So I haven’t really been going to the Fleshlight message board all that often, it got a little depressing reading about all these dudes who are wasting good erections on rubber pussy, if I had the ability to get and maintain an erection, I would not be throwing them away to something that doesn’t smell like a dumpster, I would be hunting the finest low quality women around, seducing them with drugs, a warm meal and a shower and inviting them back to my motel room for a romp with Jesus. Not many of you can say that, but that’s only because of your name, blame your parents and not me. So I come across this post from this dude justifying that he isn’t into a poofter. Motherfucker jerks off, possibly using his fleshlight to videos of other men rockin their fleshlights. I think the whole idea of watchin a dude jerk off is gay unto itself and the addition of a plastic pussy doesn’t take away from that.

This dirty homegirl is obviously a little torn up inside about this shit, so he wrote a fuckin novel explaining that he doesn’t wish the fleshlight in the video was his mouth, point of the story is that watching people’s internal struggles with their sexuality is always fucking funny…..

You gots to read this shit and it is after the jump…..

Jesus, the homophobia on here is creepy. Get over it guys!

Look, I love the Fleshlight, I’ve been using them for three years, I’m TOTALLY STRAIGHT. I love women.

And I LOVE to watch fleshlight videos of other guys getting off with them. It gets me off so fucking good. Why? It has nothing to do with watching another guy’s cock, as the tough lumberjack fellows on here have insisted.

ChuckB28 posted quite a few pics and vids of himself on here getting off with his Fleshlight. One in particular, is a vid of him fucking his fleshlight hands-free in a matress to a magazine pic of Angelina Jolie. It’s one of the fucking hottest things I’ve ever seen, and I’ve gotten off to it many times. I told Chuck myself that I loved his vids for this reason, and I told him I got off to them. He thought it was very cool, and he understood completely that it wasn’t a gay thing at all.

There are also a few Yahoo groups that I visit, where guys post pictures of their favorite female celebrities that they jerk off and cum on, and I think that is also very hot. To see a hot celeb spatterred with cum, it’s like you know inside you would do that same thing if the picture was in front of you, and it’s so deeply naughty and sexual to see someone else actually post a picture of that, it’s the ULTIMATE voyeurism, and I think it’s fantastic. Again, I’m not attracted to guy’s cum…..I’m attracted to what he DID with his cum, which is the exact same thing I would do with a slutty picture of my favorite female celeb. Make sense?

I can tell you exactly, that when I’m watching him fuck his fleshlight to Angelina Jolie, it’s like I’m watching myself as a horny guy alone in my room getting off to my favorite porn, it’s as if I have a mirror into myself, like I’m watching me, and yet I know it’s someone else. And that whole dynamic is electrifying. And, to go one step further, when I’m watching that vid, I’m not looking at his cock, I’m looking at what he’s DOING with it. I’m looking at the picture that he’s looking at, I’m watching him go in and out of his Fleshlight, and I match his movements. It’s not an attraction to HIM, it’s an attraction to what he’s thinking as he’s doing it.

What it has to do with is making a connection…..a VERY intimate and deep connection with another person. In this case, the connection is that I’m watching something very, very private, and I know that the guy is thinking the same thing I’m thinking as he’s fucking his fleshlight….i.e. “I’m going to cum soon, I can’t hold back, I’m thinking about my favorite porn star”, etc. etc. etc. It’s like your watching YOURSELF, and that intensifies the experience a thousand times.

I’ll go you one better!! I’m more secure in my manhood and I’m more secure emotionally than the homophobes, because I can still stay in my complete straightness and yet share a very intimate and private connection with an anonymous guy, knowing that we are doing something for the exact same reason, and for the very same emotional and sexual rush. I am in no way attracted to a man’s penis or his anatomy, YET I can totally get off within the context of knowing that what I’m watching is something that I can completely and fully relate to. And that is….NOT GAY. The word gay is so twisted around on here it’s pathetic.

So…..to all the iron-man titan manly men on here…….here’s my take – I get off with my Fleshlight in a way YOU will never be able to, you’re missing out on an intense experience. Oh, if only you poor bastards could get over your homocreepiness……

Miko

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