I thought this would be appropriate for all the perverts who read this site, or used to read the site, but got turned off when they saw too many words. The reason this shit reminded me of you is because you have a problem, you masturbate too much. You spend too much time at home, and whenever your mom’s out doing groceries, or in the other room, or you have 5 minutes of privacy the first thing you think of is jerking off. You are a sexual predator, and Jennifer Ellison, a 23 year old pop singer from the UK thinks you should stop. Unless her PDA is about polluting/littering, in which case my whole post is a complete waste of time. It wouldn’t be the first time. I suck at life.