These pictures of Charlize Theron are pretty shitty and that’s ok. The first time I saw Charlize Theron naked was while working at a gas station in the late 90’s and she did Playboy. I got busted jerking off to mag and that was pretty much my last day working here. I know busting nut to Playboy is almost as bad as getting off to Jeopardy or the Men’s Olympic Gymnastics competition but you gotta remember that this was a time when my dick still worked and Playboy was good enough. The internet meant nothing to me and it was right before my life feel apart, so I hold Charlize Theron semi-responsible for all this…..

Come to think of it, maybe she wasn’t the playboy celebrity I got busted jerkin’ off to on the job, but I’ll just pretend she was because I already wrote this post….

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