I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2007

21

Jun

I am – Christine Lakin is Worth a Round of the Day

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This girls name is Christine Lakin, I had never heard of her, but didn’t really care because after seeing the pictures I figured she was worth a post on a girl you thought you never heard of but would jerk off to if you saw her naked.

It turns out she was on the show Step by Step in the 90s. I spent most of the 90s fucked up, but that never stopped me from strapping in on Friday nights at 8 pm to watch ABC’s TGIF. I was all about Boy Meets World, Full House and my favorite shit was Step by Step with Suzanne Sommer’s tits. It was the perfect gateway show to harder drugs and a good way to get my weekends on a role. That moral at the end of every show made me realize why I drank and slept with hookers.

Speaking of being someone no one knows, I went out last night and started talking to random people who were asking me about what I do, because it seems like that’s what people like to know about a person. I told them that I run the hottest website on the internet that nobody reads and none of them had ever heard of the website. I wasn’t surprised because if it was the hottest site that everyone read, I’d be living in a much nicer shitbox of an apartment. I also learned that when you tell girls you want to make them famous on the internet they generally don’t get naked in excitement and kinda just give you dirty looks acting like you just asked them to take 2 dicks in their ass on video and walk away disgusted, even when you tell them your site was voted number 1 in the city, they keep on walking because no one gives a fuck about a number 1 rated site, because the internet is fucking lame. I also realized that cocaine is a lot bigger than it was when I was too poor to do it back in my Step by Step years, when I would have welcomed it with open arms. There was constant line-ups to the bathroom and my little bladder and big drinking stomach couldn’t handle it. I didn’t piss myself but I did blame Lohan for fuckin’ up all these kids and ruining public bathrooms in bars internationally….

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