I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2007

17

Jul

I am – Kelly Osborne Eats Popsicles of the Day

Kelly Osborne

When I think of girls eating popsicles, I think of girls in short-shorts, with knee high socks, in really, tight white shirts that are kinda see through, but maybe that’s just me. Instead, here’s Kelly Osborne, a piece of celebrity offspring that I really try to hate but can’t. As much as she’s a whiney, spoiled, little bitch at times, she doesn’t really deny it, and the first step towards beating is a problem is admitting you have one.

I work at Dairy Queen part time, and you would be amazed at the number of fat little shits that come in there everyday with the parents. They are obviously not in need of any more ice cream, hamburgers, french fries etc, yet day after day, their parents come in to buy it for them. All it takes is the kid laying down on the floor I never mop and kicking and screaming for a minute and half and BAM!, they get whatever they want. It;’s truly amazing to watch a 35 year old man crumble at due to a 5 year old.

Unfortunately, I learned pretty fast that throwing temper tantrums never works with Jesus and my mother. One time they left me in Wal-Mart, kicking and screaming until I realized they were gone. and started to cry. I took a ride home from some random stranger and made small talk with him about school, while in my head all I could think of was this old dude killing me and dumping me in a ditch off the highway. I got home, went to my room and cried, and I also didn’t throw any more temper tantrums after that.


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