I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2007

24

Jul

I am – Pam Anderson and the Big Pink Elephant of the Day

Pamela Anderson

Julien, our token gay blogger sent this in this morning, and since you are probabaly going to die of AIDS anyways, I thought maybe you could relate!!

You know how a few years ago it was this huge deal that Pamela Anderson had hepatitis? It was all over the news and shit and it was always getting brought up whenever anyone talked about her. And now, people don’t talk about it anymore. I mean, she’s still all over the media but there is never any mention of the fact that she contracted hepatitis. I came up with a theory about why this happened.

I got kicked out my house when I was sixteen by my father when he found a bunch of gay porn magazines of mine that I had stolen from a convenience store. He said all the cliche things like “I didn’t rasie no faggot� and “No son of mine is going to suck cock� etc etc etc. So he hit me a couple of times and I ran out the house and went to live with my hippy Aunt. I’ve talked to him a couple of times in the past few years, but it has been nothing more than a few sentences here and there. The point of this story is, if I caught HIV and then went back to him and said “Guess what Dad? I’m HIV Positive!� he wouldn’t be shocked at all because in his mind, that’s what gay people do, they get HIV and die. So me being HIV positive would be no surprise to him, it wouldn’t change a thing. To him, me catching it is like saying the sky is blue.

So the reason why people don’t talk about Pam’s hepatitis anymore is that it’s a little redundant. Of course she contracted a STD, she’s Pamela fucking Anderson! This whole thing was practically written in the stars. I mean no one’s going to be shocked when Lindsey Lohan
dies of a drug overdose right?

Smooch!

Julien


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