I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

04

Aug

Sophie Monk is Rich of the Day

Call me sexist, but I don’t think girls should drive expensive sports cars because they have a hard enough time driving everyday cars that putting that kind of horsepower under their vaginas is just asking for disaster and a very luxurious traffic jam caused by her multiple attempts at parallel parking the fuckin’ thing. The only stick a girl should be rockin’ is the one in her man’s pants and if she needs to get herself around to the grocery store, because that’s really the only time she should be let out of the house, she should take the fuckin’ bus. But if a bitch insists on having her own car because we live in a modern world where women don’t belong to men, there’s always the Smart Car or the Miata or a minivan to pick the kids up from soccer, but a Ferraris shouldn’t even be considered because it should be illegal for them to get behind the wheel.

Speaking of girls lookin’ retarded, I was just outside for about a minute to see if the world had been wiped out by some kind of natural disaster and to my disappointment it hadn’t but this really hot girl wearing the tightest little shorts and the tightest little top rolled by me. I felt like she was sent by god to bring joy to my life with her bounching braless breasts in a wifebeater, before realizing she was on a fucking skateboard, not the longboard kind that you see on the beach that everyone is using for transportation these days, but an actual skateboard like Tony Hawk would use and no matter how hot she was, her awkward balancing and use of the thing offended me so much that I couldn’t enjoy her the way she was meant to be enjoyed because of her stupid gender bending behavior because she feels the need to break barriers by using something made for boys badly and I felt like I was at the circus.

Either way, here are pictures of Sophie Monk and her weird lookin’ face I want to fuck shopping for luxury sports cars because she’s richer than us even though she’s barely done anything, proving that entertainment is a smart career choice if you’re lookin’ for one. She’s obviously trying to feed some emptiness caused by her future husband and lesbian lover from Good Charlotte cheating on her with Paris Hilton, which is usually something that leads other girls to suicide because that vagina bumpin’ by association is too close for comfort.

Posted in:Rich|Sophie Monk

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