I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

26

Nov

Beyonce in Full Body Spanx on the Today Show of the Day

In honor of Thanksgiving, I decided to post these pictures of a turkey, or someone who will probably eat an entire turkey tomorrow, because Beyonce is the kind of girl who just doesn’t like sharing and has the ability to clear a table stocked with enough fried chicken for a couple dozen people, but in her defense, she’s never been this physical in her performances, and that probably works up a mean appetite, you know making those who used to be shocked with how much she managed to eat before, she was doin’ nothing, totally blown the fuck away when they see what she manages to stuff in her face now, and it’s got something to do with her not wanting to share the spotlight with the younger, hotter Rihanna who I know she just can’t fucking stand, even though Rihanna’s career is making Beyonce’s divorce settlement a lot more lucrative, when she finally leaves Jay Z for two timing her.

Every time I watch her do this song and dance, I laugh because of the pain I see in her eyes. It’s like watching some morbidly obese person trying to get a new lease on life and taking their fat ass to the streets to burn off some calories, or like watching my wife trying to get off the couch. There is struggle and panting as heart is begging her to stop, but Beyonce won’t listen, because if she does, it means Rihanna won.

At least she’s managed to find a full-body pair of spanx to strap her in and keep her fat from spilling out all over the fuckin’ reinforced stage, making the homeless people they kicked off their corner to throw this street performance even more pissed off, you know in a first they take their homes and now they’re rubbing how much food they’ve managed to stuff in their faces in their face, while they sitting there starving, cold in mismatched shoes waiting for it all to end..

Here are the pics.

And the videos….

Her Performing Single Ladies…

Her Obnoxious Grand Entrance and a Little Crazy in Love

Bonus Some Dude in the Crowd’s Vidoe

Posted in:Beyonce|Fat|Spandex

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