Modern Day Journalism




Cameron Diaz Does Maxim of the Day


I hate Maxim.

I mean if you think about it, I should try to be friends with them and sell my site to them, so I can retire, and travel the world with a flipcam making amateur porn videos of dumb sluts for the internet for at least a month, because that’s all this site is worth…

But instead, I write hateful letters to the Vice President, and CEO telling them how useless they are, how shitty their photoshoots are, and to embrace the fact that it’s not 1994 and the world doesn’t need them….

Leading to them hating me and sending me lawyers letters everytime I post pictures of their bottom feeding celebrity photoshoots, that have declined and become more insignificant every year….

Because I’m not in a position to take pics of these bitches in my basement apartment, so I rely on other people to do it for me…

And the funny thing in all this is that MAXIM featured me in an article years ago….gave me a photoshoot like I was Cameron Diaz and shit….giving me more reason to be nice to them…

But I just feel when you’re done, you’re done and sometimes you need a friend to tell you…

That doesn’t mean I don’t like looking at Cameron Diaz’s old photoshopped legs….She’s spectacular…that’s just to say, I’d rather see it in any other venue but in MAXIM…

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