I know that Jessica Simpson has a team behind her on this pregnancy publicity stunt, cuz she isn’t clever enough to dress as a “Mummy” on Halloween, the day she decides to announce on her blog that she’s going to be a “Mommy”, even though we were all 90 percent sure she was, even though I liked that 10 percent grey area where it was just where her fatness decided to deposit itself, like the permanently pregnant looking girl who works at Walmart the last 5 years, and who has never given birth…we all know someone like that, and it is always way more joyous when witnessing some unsuspecting asshole congratulate them, far more joyous than the actual miracle of birth cuz it does more self-esteem damage and less vaginal damage, perfect combination for me to get laid….

Either way, now she’s got an excuse for eating for two….at least for a few months…who cares..

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