I accidentally watched TV at a friend’s house the other day and I was exposed to a trailer for a movie called Mother’s Day, where I assume Jennifer Aniston played a mother, something she’ll likely be nominated for an Academy Award for, provided it’s not seen as the straight to DVD smut it is….an Academy Award nominated roll not because she ever plays anyone with more depth than herself…but because having kids of her own is such a fucking stretch, it’s like Halle Berry playing a black hood woman, or Charlize theron playing a monster, or Cuba Gooding Jr playing a retard…yes my Academy Award knowledge died in 1997…

You see, no one has ever knocked her up, maybe because she’s a narcissist who didn’t realize she would hit menopause ever…or didn’t want to ruin her body…or didn’t want to have a clone get in the way of her life…or maybe…because the second she wanted to reproduce every motherfucker ran….including but no limited to Brad Pitt, who you clearly know from his army of kids…was into having kids…just not with her…

I don’t find Jennifer Aniston hot, especially now that she’s “47” years old….I do remember her when she was on Friends with her hard nipples and high pay day in an era where sitcoms paid idiots who didn’t deserve the money too much fucking money…because fans were committed to their characters…something that made the execs a hell of a lot more money than the people they exploited with million dollar per episode pay checks to…sure not quite exploitation…but I would have just killed her off…

Doesn’t matter, Here’s her bra…and hard old granny face….not as botoxed as you’d expect…

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