Ass Archives - Page 30 of 44 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

27

Sep

I am – Danielle Lloyd Ass Flash Pictures of the Day

I saw these picture of Danielle Lloyd the other day and wasn’t too impressed, because the ass flash picture wasn’t released. I don’t remember who she is, probably from Big Brother UK but I do know that she’s one of those chicks who constantly exposes herself and when I see her name in the boards I rip my pictures off of, usually means a guaranteed post…

Reality is that I like slutty lookin girls who dress in revealing clothes. I like girls who show off their bodies and don’t wear panties. I like being with girls who like to flash their bodies and their body parts discreetly even though they usually suck in bed, but watching other guys get hard over them is a total power trip. Unfortunately that hasn’t happened since I got one of my chicks to not wear panties one night and discreetly expose the shit, but that was a long fucking time ago….

I also like girls who like sex. So I spent the last hour sitting on a park bench outside a maternity store. I do this sometimes because I like to let the girls know that I know what they’ve been up to by giving them dirty looks or creepy smirks. In my head I think to myself how that bitch let a dude bust nut inside her and smile and I know she knows I know she let some dude bust in her and that in a few months so will the rest of the world….it’s kinda like she’s released a sex tape or has starred in a porn flick that I’ve never seen, but I still know she was in it.

Here are those Danielle Lloyd pics.

Related Posts:

Danielle Lloyd Interracial Bikini Pictures
Danielle Lloyd Expensive Bikini Pictures
Danielle Lloyd Fat Ass Bikini Pictures
Danielle Lloyd Green Bikini Pictures

2007

26

Sep

I am – Kim Kardashian’s Mom Jeans of the Day

3 Comments »

I was at a bar the other day and I saw 2 chicks making out with each other. They were like half-breed lesbians who didn’t think it was funny when I moved in and asked for a 3-way kiss. They were too busy being into each other and it was pretty much a waste of a hot chick. She looked really hot in her tight skirt and cleavage exposing shirt and the way she moved made her look like a dirty little fuck. She on this sexually liberated experimental kick that girls go through, but she wasn’t in the mood for any cock. Not that I had any cock to offer but they were blowing off dudes from every angle. I don’t think they were pulling the whole frat boy chick making out thing to get guys to look at them but I do think they were legitimately into each other and not doing it for attention, but because they were drunk and horny and were going to go home to fuck the shit out of each other in the scissor stance. I didn’t find it hot to watch and refused to watch the spectacle because I can’t deal with hot lesbians who turn down cock. I can deal with lesbians who look like dudes and wear leather because they are just man hating rape victims and shit, but hot lesbians who I want to fuck but who don’t want anything to do with me or any other penis for that matter but hot chicks who who are into other hot chicks and refuse dick just piss me the fuck off.

Either way, Kardashian may not be into girls and she may be into black dude cock, because black guys are good at working the huge fucking asses but she’s rockin’ a pair of mom jeans, that make her ass look even bigger than usual and that remind me more of the man hating lesbians who work construction and drink been than the hot little sluts who don’t like dudes who I saw the other day. Both are equally annoying.

Related Posts:

Kim Kardashian and Jenna do Heatherette Fashion Show
Kristen Davis and Kim Kardashian are Friends
Kim Kardashian Bikini Pictures
Kim Kardashian’s Armenian Ass

2007

26

Sep

I am – Kim Kardashian's Mom Jeans of the Day

3 Comments »

I was at a bar the other day and I saw 2 chicks making out with each other. They were like half-breed lesbians who didn’t think it was funny when I moved in and asked for a 3-way kiss. They were too busy being into each other and it was pretty much a waste of a hot chick. She looked really hot in her tight skirt and cleavage exposing shirt and the way she moved made her look like a dirty little fuck. She on this sexually liberated experimental kick that girls go through, but she wasn’t in the mood for any cock. Not that I had any cock to offer but they were blowing off dudes from every angle. I don’t think they were pulling the whole frat boy chick making out thing to get guys to look at them but I do think they were legitimately into each other and not doing it for attention, but because they were drunk and horny and were going to go home to fuck the shit out of each other in the scissor stance. I didn’t find it hot to watch and refused to watch the spectacle because I can’t deal with hot lesbians who turn down cock. I can deal with lesbians who look like dudes and wear leather because they are just man hating rape victims and shit, but hot lesbians who I want to fuck but who don’t want anything to do with me or any other penis for that matter but hot chicks who who are into other hot chicks and refuse dick just piss me the fuck off.

Either way, Kardashian may not be into girls and she may be into black dude cock, because black guys are good at working the huge fucking asses but she’s rockin’ a pair of mom jeans, that make her ass look even bigger than usual and that remind me more of the man hating lesbians who work construction and drink been than the hot little sluts who don’t like dudes who I saw the other day. Both are equally annoying.

Related Posts:

Kim Kardashian and Jenna do Heatherette Fashion Show
Kristen Davis and Kim Kardashian are Friends
Kim Kardashian Bikini Pictures
Kim Kardashian’s Armenian Ass

2007

25

Sep

I am – Lohan in Rehab of the Day

1 Comment »

Lohan is the kind of girl I think I will always love. She was my original celebrity obsession on this site and I tried everything I could to get in touch with her. I used to stalk her co-workers, I used to leave her voicemail messages, I used to harass Filipino kids pretending to be Lohan on Myspace. It was a big part of my life work that really never materialized. In those years I’ve seen her go from a big breasted barely 18 sex pot to a washed up 21 year old broken down pick-up truck with herpes, addiction and an eating disorder. She’s been hospitalized, arrested, in accidents. She’s had breakdowns and freak outs and itall started when her first love, the immigrant on That 70s Show broker her heart. She took some insane self destructive path to fill the void that he left by going on to have sex with everyone, while he continued to live life as is banging regular girls 10 times hotter than Lohan that were impressed by his “fame”. The biggest problem in all this is that in her path to death she never released a sex tape and at the course she’s going, she may die and then that vagina will be off limits for ever and I will never reach my goal in getting her herpes.

An ad agency for some drug rehab center in Jersey released the “Don’t Die Lindsay” ad today. It’s one of those riding a celebrity coat tail situation to get publicity to your campaign and your company in hopes of getting better business. It’s a pretty standard fucking ad, it’s just text, it’s far from genius, but I am posting it anyway, because I don’t want Lohan to die.

I was at a strip club the other day and one of the girls was brown. Every other girl in the place showed off her box, I’m talking spreading the shit, fingering the shit, sticking it in our faces, you know doing what strippers do. But this brown one kept her underwear on. I figured it was a religious thing, like female circumcision and that’s when it dawned on me. If Lohan was female circumcised when she was 18, like a good little brown girl. She woulda never got into any of these issues. Sure it’s a violent, unethical treatment of women and I can appreciate that it’s disgusting, wrong, psycho and cruel, but shit woulda done wonders for Lohan and her career. That’s all I’m saying.

Here are some pics of Lohan in some boots, with leggings on, showing off her hot little ass that she’s put a “Hello, My Name is Sober Fun” sticker on, while rockin’ an ironic shirt telling us not to follow her….without realizing that we need to follow her to stare at her ass….but at least she’s communicating with us. I figure that’s step 1 in trying to fuck her.

Related Posts:

Lohan’s Fat Ass in a Whore Stance Pictures
Lohan’s Sex Scene from I Know Who Killed Me
stepINTERVIEW with Chauntal, Some Chick Who Played Lohan in an Internet Video
Lohan’s Rehab Tits

2007

24

Sep

I am – Nicole Richie’s Pregnant Bikini of the Day

3 Comments »

These have been out for a while. I saw them over the weekend. I thought that it was nice to see her taking a vacation from her life that is a vacation. I am not one to really talk. I may not have any money but I don’t have to get up to look at some asshole boss in the face everyday….and sometimes that’s more important than having money.

Either way, I like pregnant girls because girls generally won’t ever let me get them pregnant. That means I have never had sex with one, or had to deal with all their raging pregnancy emotions and hormonal imbalances. I am the kind of guy who girls end up banging out of confusion or depression and as their lives go on they realize that I am not worthy of dropping my seed in their womb. Even my wife told me that there was no way she would ever have my babies when we first hooked up and I thought it was the right thing to do since I was married and hated her.

Reality is that kids are kinda cool and would have distracted me from things I hated, until realizing that they were damn expensive to keep around and then I’d resent them for having to get a job that would make me face a boss everyday just to pay for their stupid designer clothes….So reality is that I may not have a legacy or a little fucker to pass all my wisdom onto, but at least I don’t have to work…

Point of all this is to say I could go off about how bitch looks like a rat-faced rodent of some sort and that she’s probably pregnant with 10 little babies in this litter, or I could go on to talk about how she’s so anorexic and now she’s not pregnant she just has a distended ethiopian stomach (it’s her heritage), I could go onto how the baby isn’t really a baby, it’s just where Good Charlotte hides their make-up and gay porn because they are fags and they don’t want that getting out…I could talk about how dumpy her ass is or how her milk filled tits are really luxurious but I am not going to do that because I would rather go out and get drunk. See ya.

Related Posts:

Nicole Richie Leaves Town of the Day
Nicole Richie’s Pregnant Titties
Nicole Richie’s See Through Maternity Slutwear
Nicole Richie is Pregant!!!!

2007

24

Sep

I am – Nicole Richie's Pregnant Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

These have been out for a while. I saw them over the weekend. I thought that it was nice to see her taking a vacation from her life that is a vacation. I am not one to really talk. I may not have any money but I don’t have to get up to look at some asshole boss in the face everyday….and sometimes that’s more important than having money.

Either way, I like pregnant girls because girls generally won’t ever let me get them pregnant. That means I have never had sex with one, or had to deal with all their raging pregnancy emotions and hormonal imbalances. I am the kind of guy who girls end up banging out of confusion or depression and as their lives go on they realize that I am not worthy of dropping my seed in their womb. Even my wife told me that there was no way she would ever have my babies when we first hooked up and I thought it was the right thing to do since I was married and hated her.

Reality is that kids are kinda cool and would have distracted me from things I hated, until realizing that they were damn expensive to keep around and then I’d resent them for having to get a job that would make me face a boss everyday just to pay for their stupid designer clothes….So reality is that I may not have a legacy or a little fucker to pass all my wisdom onto, but at least I don’t have to work…

Point of all this is to say I could go off about how bitch looks like a rat-faced rodent of some sort and that she’s probably pregnant with 10 little babies in this litter, or I could go on to talk about how she’s so anorexic and now she’s not pregnant she just has a distended ethiopian stomach (it’s her heritage), I could go onto how the baby isn’t really a baby, it’s just where Good Charlotte hides their make-up and gay porn because they are fags and they don’t want that getting out…I could talk about how dumpy her ass is or how her milk filled tits are really luxurious but I am not going to do that because I would rather go out and get drunk. See ya.

Related Posts:

Nicole Richie Leaves Town of the Day
Nicole Richie’s Pregnant Titties
Nicole Richie’s See Through Maternity Slutwear
Nicole Richie is Pregant!!!!

2007

24

Sep

I am – Meg White Sex Tape of the Day

1 Comment »

I am a little slow moving today with the whole being hung over and having a site that crashes more than Lohan driving drunk and high in her benz, but who really needs to be fast on this Meg White sex tape shit. Bitch is a fucking pig and always left me feeling uneasy. I never found her hot, so watching her get fucked isn’t really hot either. The only time I would want to see her get fucked is on stage by her brother, but that’s just because I am convinced they bang. Otherwise why would he let her in his band? You never do see the dude in the videos face…That said, who really knows if this is even Meg White, I don’t think anyone has looked at her long enough to know what she looks like, they just see a brunette fat chick and assume….

Either way, she’s a bad lay but takes the load inside her like any self-respecting woman should, provided she’s into STDs and unwanted pregnancy….which I am but only because there’s just something exciting about waiting it out for the month in uncertainty. You know that excitement that hits when your girl tells you she’s got her period, even though that only lasts about 3 minutes until you realize that she’s probably not going to let you fuck her for the next week, unless you have a cool chick who’s into period sex and you don’t mind the mess.

Speaking of mess, here’s that video, listen to her pant, then fuck yourself. Sicko.

I am – Pam Anderson Covered Up at the Beach

No Comments »

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

I was surprised to see these pictures of Pam Anderson on the beach covered up, mainly because she’s an exhibitionist slut who is normally in a skimpy bikini with fake and real parts spilling the fuck out, but I guess it was cold out considering that buddy she’s with is rocking a gayer than bicycle shorts, tight as fuck wet suit.

I usually rip into this bitch for being a trashy washed up stripper. Or I go off about her hepatitis and how she was the object of all your wet dreams when you were in high school, but I guess I gotta step back and be realistic for a second. She’s got a couple of kids, she’s pretty menopausal, and she’s still got a tighter body than most 20 year olds I try to get naked. Sure, I prey on the ugly ones because they appreciate the attention and I appreciate their youth, but they are still girls. I think Pam’s future husband does the same thing, only he’s more successful and the young girls he goes after are heiresses that he’s enterprising enough to film getting fucked raw dog. I always wondered if he was the source of her herpes, which is the strain that has hit everyone in Hollywood, or if she scored that somewhere else. It doesn’t matter. What does matter is what Pam and his sex smells like, you know her hep, his herp shit’s could be pretty fucking gross.

I am not so into fake tits, I don’t like what they do to girls. They make them so tit-centric that being around them is fucking tedious. They always talk about their tits, flash their tits, make people touch their tits, which isn’t the bad part, the bad part is that I am never the one they ask to touch, lick or rate them, and whenever I am left out, I get bitter. I was walking down the street today and saw some pregnant lookin’ chick walking alone with a set of fake tits, my first thought was that I bet she didn’t know the daddy’s name because her fake tits lured him in one drunken night, when I asked her, she wasn’t too impressed and told me to fuck off.

Either way, here are the Pam Anderson and the shit stain on her arm covered up on the beach pics.

Don’t worry, this post didn’t make me laugh either.

Related Posts:

Pam Anderson White Bikini Pictures
Pam Anderson in a Black Bikini
Pam Anderson Licks Some Dude With Her Vagina Exposed
Pam Anderson Partying in a Hooters Uniform

2007

18

Sep

I am – Pamela Anderson in a Bikini in Malibu of the Day

4 Comments »

I guess Pam Anderson doesn’t realize that her prime ended when Baywatch was still on the air and ever since then it’s been this downward spiral of fake tit removal, fake tit replacement and a haggard old catcher’s mitt of a face that reminds me of the lady who works at the Salvation Army where I buy all my used panties for my used panty collection. I am weird like that.

Pam Anderson can’t seem to get herself out of a fucking bikini. Every week there are new pictures of her half naked and although half naked is good, I find this shit desperation like a Britney Spears comeback performance. At first I just thought she went insane and got a bikini grafted onto her because it is such a part of who she is, but then I realized that that was a stupid thought and that she is just like the local stripper, who was the star performer ten years ago, you know the one who everyone wanted the lap dance from and you’d never get a chance to touch her tits because she was always in the back working, who now still works the same club, holding onto a dream, remembering the good years while chain smoking at the bar hoping that someone will either remember her and take her for a dance the sake of a fantasy they never lived out, or that all the other girls get taken in the back and she’s the last man standing. She knows she’d be better off working as a receptionist or at the cosmetics counter of the Pharmacy but stripping is all she knows.

Here are some Pam Anderson bikini ass pics for you to live out the fantasy from the past when she was actual relevant, hot and wanted by all. Before she had two washed up losers fighting over her. Around the time of the sex tape, but all things aside, she has an amazing ass and I’d still do her, her big tits and her hepatitis ridden vagina.

Related Posts:

Some Pam Anderson in a Black Bikini Pictures
Pam Anderson’s Vagina Puppy Pictures
Pam Anderson in a One Piece Bathing Suit Pictures
Pam Anderson Nipple and Ass in a Bikini

2007

17

Sep

I am – Jennifer Ellison Bikini Pictures of the Day

1 Comment »

I have no idea when these pictures were taken mainly because I don’t even know who this bitch is, but also because I am not good at staying on top of shit. I can’t even recognize the real celebrities in pictures so pointing out some no name is pretty much impossible. I do know that these pictures are doing the rounds and that she’s got some big tits and an exposed ass and that’s something I fully support.

The thing I like about no name d-list celebrities is that they have these huge fucking egos. They think they are more important than they are and give attitude to anyone who crosses their path, because they are trying to maintain that they are important because they have been on TV or in a magazine or some shit. Real celebs aren’t as accessible because people are constantly running after them and actually care about them, so I’d never know if they work the same way but I’ll never know and I don’t really care.

What I do know is that I met some useless actor from commercials out of LA who has been there for 2 years trying to establish himself with some kind of career. He was talking to a girl I was talking to. Dude was talking about how he likes to visit montreal, but his new home is LA and that he’ll be going back fro auditions in a couple of days, thinking that that will lock down her vagina for him. He would go off on how he’s met certain celebs and how the bars in LA are way cooler than the shit hole we happened to be in. He was drinking champagne and I thought his game was fucking weak but dude still got the girl to go home with him.

All this to say that losers with a dream who are delusional enough to move to LA in hopes of being found, get a lot of pussy when they leave LA because the girls they meet are easily impressed and fuck them in the event they ever do hit it big so that they have a story to tell their kids.

What I am getting at is that if you can’t impress girls you meet lie. Tell them you are some d-list piece of shit, drink champagne and compare everything to LA and you will probably end up getting laid or beat up by local guys who think actors are fags and don’t like the way their scarves seduce the local sluts….

Here are those Jennifer Ellison Bikini pictures.

Related Posts:

Jennifer Ellison’s See Through Shirt Pictures
Jennifer Ellison is a 2 Dollar Hooker Pictures
Jennifer Ellison Public Service Announcement

Archive for the Ass Category