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Archive for the Body Category

2010

14

May

Gisele’s Hot Mom Body of the Day

Fine. I’ll stop beating the dead horse with my dick. Gisele isn’t a tranny from Brazil. Tom Brady isn’t a faggot who joined football for sexual reasons. The baby wasn’t staged to kill the rumors cuz they are rich and powerful and can afford to manipulate the world with fake babies…..as long as she agrees to keep on putting out modeling pics like this…cuz dick or not…sometimes it’s ok to stop asking questions…and take things at face value…especially if face value looks like this and if we really need an expert opinion, I have no problem volunteering my mouth to explore the mangled mess in her panties, cuz cock or not, getting off to this is not homo…even if it’s smoke, mirrors, duct tape and photoshop…..good enough for me….and I’m sure it’s good enough for you too…you sick fuck

Posted in:Body|Gisele Bundchen

2010

11

May

Pixie Lott Almost Pantless of the Day

I don’t really know who Pixie Lott is, but I do know that she’s not stepping up and being competitive in terms of her performing. Everyone knows that girls on stage, even the fat ones like Lily Allen, the old ones like Madonna, the unattractive gender confused ones like Lady Gaga, the sloppy ones like Katy Perry, the old timers like X-Tina and Britney, the black ones with no talent like Rihanna and the black ones who people thought was born a man like Ciara all get on stage in leotards, so this Pixie Lott bullshit clearly doesn’t want to be famous, becasue she’s covering the fuck up as much as she can, while still rockin’ what needs to be rocked, like a bitch in a bikini who refused to remove the towel from around her waist, I feel ripped the fuck off.

Pics via LFI

Posted in:Body|Pantsless|Pixie Lott

2010

19

Apr

Chloe Bridges Shows Off Her Body of the Day

Her name is Chloe Bridges. I’ve never heard of her but she’s some teen star of low level movies you’ve probably never heard of. She’s over 18 and I’m posting the shit because clearly she’s trying to slut things up in her tight dress, showing off her ass, and blowjob lips in efforts to get noticed, like some low level Angelina Jolie / Megan Fox wannabe who accidentally went to Octomom’s plastic surgeon before getting hit by a fuckin’ bus, but I’d still fuck her and really that’s all that matters to me, because at 18 or 19 years old, you can be a fucking overweight hermaphrodite with bad skin, bad teeth, bad hygiene and I’d see past that shit cuz youth is something only people forced to fuck 40 year olds can really appreciate…the pussy you wouldn’t fuck when you were their age seems like prized pussy the second your 20 years older than them….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Body|Chloe Bridges

2010

17

Feb

More of Christina Aguilera’s Hot Little Body on the Day

If you read this site, you will know that I posted a few pictures of Christina Aguilera on set of her new movie, because I guess she’s an actor now, as acting doesn’t take much talent. She was wearing tight leggings and her body looked rockin, because I guess being in a movie called Burlesque means she strips down, not that burlesque stripping is really anything to get excited for, but we cal all hope Hollywood puts a hotter spin on it that the burlesque shows I’ve been to, where girls who dress like Betty Page and think they are in the 1950s, who you would assume is a lesbian and who is a solid 35 pounds out of weight humiliates herself in nipple tassels, trying to cocktease, when really just providing serious comedy….because hot girls don’t need to do that kind of song and dance to get laid….they can strip at real stripclubs or fuck rich guys who pay their way…like Christina Aguilera did and I am loving Christina Aguilera’s little whore body in tights…it brings back memories of jerking off to her ten years ago…good times.

And Some Hot Mom Camel Toe

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Body|Christina Aguilera|Hot

2010

01

Feb

Sophie Turner Showin’ Off Her Body of the Day

I don’t know how old Sophie Turner is, mainly because I don’t really know who Sophie Turner is, I just know she threatened to sue me for saying she looked like a pornstar, because she looks like a fucking pornstar, but it turns out she find that offensive, because it is beneath her to fuck on camera, but it’s not beneath her to dress half naked to events, even if she looks fucking ridiculous, like a clown you probably want to fuck, despite not knowing why you want to fuck her or who she is but strictly basing it on the fact that she’s got a vagina that’s probably been worn in proper….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Body|See Thru|Sophie Turner|Tits

2010

18

Jan

Lily Allen Shows Off Her Sloppy Fucking Body in a Bikini of the Day

Lily Allen is a fucking slob and here she is in a pair of bikini bottoms showing off what not working out, eating too much, drinking too much and doing a lot of drugs thanks to the money you made using your mother’s connections and landing your a stupid record deal,recruiting dumb girls as fans and being boring while unsexy at all the same fucking time…here are the pics…

Pics via Fame


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Posted in:Body|Lily Allen|Sloppy

2009

11

Nov

LaToya Jackson’s Hot Body of the Day

I figure that it was never quite gay to jerk off to Michael Jackson, not because I spend a good year doing it, but because his voice was angelic, his talent possibly sent from god, his sexuality and gender pretty ambigious and really more on the no penis in his pants side of things. It was on the same level as a dude jerking off to an Anime movie, or a comic book character, he was just bigger than life, almost non-human sent from another planet to seduce us and manipulate us thru song but I do think it is weird to jerk off to him now that he’s pretending to be dead, and living as a muslim woman in the desert somewhere to escape his demons here…..that’s where LaToya the stand in pussy comes in. She’s like some kind of MJ fluff girl, picking up the slack from him now that he’s dropped the balls he never really had and manned up and escaped the hell he is living and her body is pretty fucking tight lookin…not to mention one I have jerked off to decades ago when she worked for Playboy…good times…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Body|Hot|Latoya Jackson

2009

29

Sep

Karina Smirnoff and Some New Boyfriend Showing Off Her Body of the Day

I am not posting these pictures because I care that Karina Smirnoff has a new boyfriend, or that I think it’s one of life’s biggest tragedies that I am not that boyfriend, because I’m not one of those people who gets that involved, you know the kind of guy who punched the wall when Aguilera got married when I had a bet running with someone for 1000 dollars that I’d fuck her before either of us die, I just don’t bother with these celebrity idiots since they don’t exist to me since I can’t grab their asses in bars when drunk, but I know someone out there is upset about this and that person watches Dancing with the Stars everyday, which also makes him a little homo or a little teenage girl or even a little bored middle age housewife along with the weirdo lonely loser he is, so who she fucks doesn’t matter, especially when she rose to the top as a mail order bride or girl in the international sex trade and I guess that doesn’t matter, what does matter is that Karina Smirnoff is showing off tit cuz a dancing body is not a body worth wasting.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Body|Karina Smirnoff|New Boyfriend

2009

25

Sep

Stephanie Pratt’s Unfortunate Last Name of the Day

I am not going to say that Stephanie Pratt is hot, because her face looks like a pile of fucking shit after I ate my wife’s make-up one night when I was fuckin’ drunk, but I am trying to ignore the fact that she is not only on the biggest piece of garbage to hit televison since Laguna Beach, I am also going to really try to ignore that she is only on the show because she is related to Spencer Pratt, and not the kind of related you don’t mind being, like second cousins or some shit, because this bitch fell out of the same fucking pussy as him. I am doing my best to appreciate her tight skinny body, because in this day and age, it’s a rarity because that whole obesity crisis is taking the fuck over, and girls who would have been hot are now fat and ugly girls who are skinny are considered hot just because we have limited options and take what we can fucking get and the way I’m doing that is imagining that if I was know I was going to fuck her, I’d go out and fuck the dirtiest street whore I could find a few weeks earlier, without a condom, in hopes of getting AIDS, that I can pass onto her and in turn the entire cast of The Hills because they use the same port-o-potty or some shit..pretty much saving the fucking world from the garbage these assholes spew.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Body|Legs|Stephanie Pratt

2009

03

Aug

Jessica Alba Inspires New Mothers With This Body of the Day

It’s taken a while, but it looks like Jessica Alba’s gone and got her body back. I guess we can all stop hating on Cash Warren and calling him a muderer for killin’ her body and we can go back to sympathizing with him knowing that this bitch trapped the motherfucker for life, but at least she’s lookin good now while doin’ it.

Let’s just hope for everyone’s sake, the next time she lets a dude cum inside her that she has the decency to herself and the rest of us to get fuckin’ Plan B morning after pill, or better yet a fuckin’ abortion, because abortions are like porn to me, they are also a total relief and if I could, I’d devote my life to abortion, but unfortunately it takes years of schooling to be an abortionist, that you can work your way around if you want to get arrested. I’ve looked into it.

Here’s her body in her bikini for her big reveal you’ve all already masturbated to..

Posted in:Bikini|Body|Jessica Alba

2009

31

Jul

Some Bai Ling in Some Skimpy Outfit of the Day

It’s hard not to be into a tight Asian body, that even if it’s on some useless, possibly 50 year old, cunt, who really isn’t all that useless if you think about it, because she exposes her nipples on the fuckin’ regular, because it gets the inner pedophile out of you when you get to fuck them and shit won’t get you arrested or shanked in prison for stealing innocence, if if the vagina was so small it made you think you did, but I guess I’ll never know just how small an asian vagina actually is since I am a married man….but I’m sure Bai Ling does, since she has one and I’m also sure she’s done everything in her power to beat that shit up and make it look as big as the other girls in Hollywood, but all her extra meat went to her nipples…

I don’t know what I am talking about. I just wanna put that out there if you’re reading this scratchin’ your head wondering what the fuck I am getting at, assuming someone actually reads this….even though I know they don’t….

Posted in:Bai Ling|Body|Vagina

2009

27

Jul

Elisabetta Gregoraci in a Bikini With Her Billion Dollar Tits of the Day

When you are an old fat billionaire you not only get to fuck young tight bodied wonderbra models, but you get to marry them and cheat on them with even younger tighter models, while the original young tight wonderbra model won’t do shit about it, because she’s hooked on the lifestyle and you were smart enough to sign a prenup leaving her nothing, not that you’d want to fuck other pussy with this laying in your bed everynight, and by not wanting to fuck other pussy I mean, all pussy gets boring, even if it is attached to the hottest body, because guess what bitches, no matter who they are, get fuckin’ annoying, and new bitches keep shit fresh, especially when you have the old ball and chain at home waiting for you as a back-up in the event the new one isn’t as good as she is proving yet again that being a billionaire makes for a good fuckin’ life.

Posted in:Bikini|Body|Elisabetta Gregoraci|Flavio Briatore

2009

13

Jul

Lisa “Pussyface” Rinna’s Jacked Body of the Day

I used to know a bitch who was into suction on her pussy. She made this device with a plastic cup and a garden hose that she’d but over her vagina and start sucking and one day I was lucky enough to watch. She said something it being the only way she can get off, but I’ll tell you the space creature shit that happened to her vagina under that kind of pressure was disgusting as a vagina should never be seen under those conditions, and it was the one time I couldn’t get off to a naked bitch who wasn’t my wife and the shit looked a lot like Lisa Rinna’s mouth.

Here is Lisa Rinna on the beach and she is fuckin’ jacked and I guess not eating is the least she can do after spending all that money over the years on lips, tits, and labia reduction surgery that has yet to be confirmed but would explain what the hell is on her face.

Posted in:Body|Lisa Rinna|Ripped|Tits

2009

05

May

Kelly Ripa Rock Hard Bikini Body of the Day

I always liked Kelly Ripa. She made me laugh. She was little and kinda hot and she liked to get fucked. At least that what I assumed after she had all those kids because getting pregnant involves fucking. See, I am not as dumb as you thought.

What I don’t like is that her her body is so fuckin’ rock hard, sure I always shit on mom’s post pregnancy, for being ruined, and Kelly is no exception to the fucking rule, because instead of being doughy, she’s jacked on fuckin’ steroids and the way her tits are pulsating with testosterone off her chest is some weird fucking look.

That said, I wouldn’t mind watching her pussy flex its muscles. But that’s cuz I like pussy.

Posted in:Body|Kelly Ripa|Rock Hard

2009

21

Apr

Lisa Rinna Shows Off Her Tight Body in a Bikini of the Day

Lisa Rinna is old, doctored, and pretty fucking fit. She’s in this month’s playboy, I haven’t seen it yet, but with that vagina on her face, I guess there’s really no point in seeing her actual pussy, it’ll just be some deflated mess in her panties that will just let me down and my life is filled with enough of that, so I don’t want to deal with it right now. You know keep the dream of a collagen pussy alive.

I think these pics are from the weekend and hit yesterday, I’m slow. Deal with it.

Hey Fat Chicks, if you’re wondering how she stays fit, watch this video….

Posted in:Bikini|Body|Hot|Lisa Rinna|Tight