I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Candice Swanepoel Category

2014

14

Aug

Candice Swanepoel Has Crabs of the Day

She also has slaves. She’s South African, that’s kinda what those racists do, especially when they own farms and her family owns farms. It’s not anyone’s fault, it is just historical fact we can’t deny. Just like how the AIDS rate in South Africa is high enough to make you probably consider using a condom with someone like Candice Swanepoel, if you had any control of your penis provided you ever got close enough to Candice Swanepoel. It would be more of a “let’s risk this and hope she gets pregnant, is religious, pro life and stuck to me forever, I could use the monthly stipend”…you would just need to tolerate her awful, abrasive, trashier than Australian accent, which I could easily do.

TO SEE HER BEHIND THE SCENES ON SET IN LINGERIE CLICK HERE

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

13

Aug

Candice Swanepoel’s Panty Ballet of the Day

Candice Swanepoel won instagram with these pics of her lean model body doing Ballet….because I guess when she was a South African slave runner with a farm that made her rich, she was being professionally trained in dance, like the other rich girls while the hired help was dying of AIDS, poverty, and all kind of other horrible things that happen in South Africa by white people to black people…it’s historical fact….just ask Nelson.

That said, thank god she did Ballet, because these pictures happened and I am very into them. I am cultured and respect the artform like that.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

22

Jul

Candice Swanepoel Nipple on the Beach of the Day

Candice Swanepoel is probably at the point in her titty model, lingerie model, career where her nipple has been seen by pretty much everyone, that there is no need to really hide it on set…

She’s getting paid big money, she’s tired or hungover, or a wreck, at least that’s what her face is telling me, from having to actually wake up and leave the house to let assholes take pics of her for I assume minimum 30,000 dollars for the day…You know doing what she’d be doing at home all day, laying around, but in hair and make-up not at home…

I mean that’s the struggle…and when a tit falls out of a top…sometimes..it’s just all part of the job…comes with the territory – she’s a puppet and she may know it – but I have a feeling she probably thinks she’s a big deal and not a puppet at all…because rule number one about being a puppet master – is to never let the puppet know it’s a fucking puppet – otherwise it acts up..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

16

Jul

Candice Swanepoel Dog in her Crotch of the Day

Whenever I see a girl who posts a picture of a dog in her vagina – or on her vagina – wither she’s naked or clothed, I always wonder if she’s ever slept nude with her dog, only to wake up to him licking her vagina, because she’s either got her period or didn’t shower, only to close her eyes for a few minutes before pushing the dog off saying “gross, wwwwww, OMG, I can’t…I Literally Can’t”…

Now I am not sure if that’s a testament to how twisted I am, or if it is more about how little faith I have in girls to not let a massive tongue on their vaginas knowing that no one will ever know they had the massive tongue on her vagina…

I know girls have been eaten out by dogs…just google that shit…it is disturbing…but my theory if one person posted that to the web…10000s of people are doing it…

Freaks.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

08

Jul

Candice Swanepoel Boring for H&M of the Day

If you want to see a total misuse of a lingerie model, who dabbles in bikini modelling, and who I believe even has done some nude modelling, like this was the 90s and she was trying to pay rent, only it’s the 2014, and pretty much what you have to do when you sign up to be a model, you know you sell your body for money, you need to do what you’re told…kind of thing…

Just check out these Candice Swanepoel in H&M leather pants, not even focusing on her ass..

I mean H&M may be worth billions, and her 50,000 – 100,000 dollar day rate may not be anything for them, and sure cheap leather pants, can be erotic, depending how hot it is out and how many hours the girl has been wearing them…you know making them panties a little swampy…

But if you’re gonna book this talent, use it…If you go to a strip club, you don’t pay a girl to put on her track suit she wore to work…

This is some weird reverse vortex shit, I’m not sure I’m comfortable with.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

02

Jul

A Day in the Life of Candice Swanepoel of the Day

Here is a video proving that just because she’s a model, does not mean she’s interesting, has anything important to say, or that she leads a fun life…

But in Candice Swanepoel’s defence, I stopped watching in the first 10 seconds, I have better shit to do with my time…but luckily you don’t….

She’s got a hot accent, her dairy farm that expiated black workers for generations bit was a little heavy, and the fact she’s not half naked a total misuse of her talent…

But I support her body…in spirt not financially like her Victoria’s Secret bra…so here is a horrible day in the life with her…

Here are the pics from this failed campaign:

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

26

Jun

Candice Swanepoel Posted a Bikini Pic of the Day

She is a bikini model. This shouldn’t be news, noticed or cared for…Why give her attention when she’s just doing what she’s supposed to. It is like celebrating me for every blog post I post that no one reads…it’s my fucking thing, it’s part of who I am, it is what I do…only she’s a half naked millionaire model, and I am obese and just bought 5 beers with Nickels…so I guess…it’s not the same thing at all..

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

11

Jun

Candice Swanepoel and Others at the Some Silly Party of the Day

I am not a fan of Maxim, if anything they are garbage and my enemy…

Sure they used to pay me month yin the past, for a solid few years to promote their nonsense because despite being a big brand, I was a substantially bigger website than them…

Sure they featured me in their Magazine in 2007, because I am a handsome man…they even had a catered photoshoot set up for me…it was quite lovely…

But they are still low level garbage, that I guess are making a comeback, and their top 100 is some arbitrary nonsense, that only old bitches in their 30s think have nay bearing…

I mock Maxim, and their low level hustle all the time, their lawyers are fucking on my ass, and not in a prison rape this is better than jerking off kind of way…they try to sue me all the time, cuz they are run by lawyers…so they are essentially dead to me..

But I’ll still look at the pussy in attendance of their shit, and judge them for participating in the event for the brand because it is shit..

But girls will do anything for attention, for red carpet hustle…and here is the winner Candice Swanepoel, who is pretty hot…


TO SEE ALL THE PICS OF THIS RANDOM PARTY FILLED WITH AT LEAST 100 GIRLS YOU THINK ARE BABES
CLICK HERE

Here is Sophia Bush who is pretty old, but in a Weird See Through Dress that you’ll like cuz you can see what could be granny panties…


TO SEE ALL THE PICS OF THIS RANDOM PARTY FILLED WITH AT LEAST 100 GIRLS YOU THINK ARE BABES
CLICK HERE

Here is some Samantha Hoopes, old looking but brand new model in a hot dress…


TO SEE ALL THE PICS OF THIS RANDOM PARTY FILLED WITH AT LEAST 100 GIRLS YOU THINK ARE BABES
CLICK HERE

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel|Samantha Hoopes|Sophia Bush

2014

05

Jun

Candice Swanepoel is an Instgram Fitness Model of the Day

I guess Candice Swanepoel has figured out that Instagram is designed to make models you would otherwise only know for the A-List guys they have sex with and their lingerie modelling work, to have a platform to showcase their fabulous, luxurious, celebrity life…I mean that and fitness pornography….

So she’s jumped on the Izabel Goulart bandwagon and started humping the air in fitness apparel, because her handers at Victoria’s Secret fitness realize “If we own the bitch, created the bitch, let’s use the bitch’s instagram to sell our product of her in selfie videos”…because you know if it was up to Candice, she’d probably be kicking’ it not on instagram…unless of course she’s an egotistical, narcissist who believes she belongs in front of the camera to share her beauty with the world…and I have a feeling that’s exactly what she does….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel