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Archive for the Candice Swanepoel Category

2019

22

Nov

Candice Swanepoel Topless of the Day

Candice Swanepoel Topless

Candice Swanepoel to remind you that the Victoria’s Secret fashion show is no more…which I thought was already a known thing…because the world doesn’t care about shitty INFOmercials…even for lingerie that isn’t lingerie but that mall brand shopping America thinks is lingerie…made in China underwear overpriced to afford international sex working promo models…

Anyway, I never watched that shit and always wondered why anyone would be hyped on it, marketing I guess…a Network Show of girls in underwear walking…I think there’s better ways to see girls half naked…I think it’s called instagram.

I don’t think the lack of interest is because Victoria’s Secret is an outdated brand, even though it is an outdated brand….I don’t think they need to throw tranny’s and fat girls in the mix to be relevant to the masses….maybe that appeals to 20 year old college kids…but forget about them..there are plenty of us who appreciate the use of hot chicks to sell things half naked..and that appreciation isn’t going to be increased or benefit from…a man on hormones being “fabulous”…but then again men are better than women at all things they do..so maybe it is just what we are missing…

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2019

23

Oct

Candice Swanepoel Wet Bikini of the Day

Candice Swanepoel Bikini

Candice Swanepoel wearing her new Tropic of C 2020 bikini collection….Tropic of C is her own personal brand, because I guess selling bikinis for an evil empire that created her entire persona and celebrity, and has been really the only job she’s ever had, wasn’t enough for her, knowing she was getting old and that eventually they’d fire her…but instead probably invested in her Tropic of C bullshit…so she is still working with them….

I just wrote a lot of fucking nonsense…that took us on a fucking circle…to get us to no fucking conclusion…beyond Candice being an old hag of a model, trying to do her 30s building a brand off her 20s as a bikini model for the biggest panty/bikini company that financed epstein…enterprising but not nearly as hot as she was in her 20s…but kids and aging will do that to a whore…

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2019

01

Oct

Candice Swanepoel Fitness Erotica of the Day

Candice Swanepoel Fitness Erotica

Candice Swanepoel with the deep pussy stretch was the alternate title…but our friend Cannon Show gets mad when we write Deep Pussy stretch because it makes advertisers cry…like the pussies they are….maybe Candice’s cunt being stretched is like a mirror to their overly sensitive, easily offended pussies….I just don’t know.

I do know that Candice Swanepoel is doing a DEEP pussy stretch, trying to stay as fit as possible, maybe trying to retrain her muscles to hold her uterus inside her after all those kids…you know a way to not become incontinent while being as sexy as possible with her fitness erotica…because fitness is a way to post slutty content while still being a respectable woman who cares about her body and health….how can you be mad at someone being healthy…with her vagina out…who knows…who cares…

Candice Swanepoel, the Hot VS model who has only done VS, now 30 and less hot…bringing nothing great but nothing terrible and that’s ok.


Candice Swanepoel Fitness Erotica

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2019

09

Jul

Candice Swanepoel See Through of the Day

Candice Swanepoel See Through

Candice Swanepoel is a weird one. She is hot when she does Victoria’s Secret….but whenever she does anything outside of Victoria’s Secret, it ends up being what I consider a disaster or a mess or just awkward.

It is like she can’t handle anything but Victoria’s Secret.

I can assume she’s an early model of the VS-Bot they created in an underground lab somewhere, so that they don’t have to deal with actual models, and they didn’t program her AI to be believable outside of the underwear modeling task at hand….because the now old, washed up, but once hottest VS thing…out there trying to reinvent herself or branch out is too little too late. Maybe her focus should be on dealing with her many children she’s had instead of this. Save the hot modeling for the young hot models….whoever decided the lifespan of a model should go well into her 40s is a crazy person.

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2019

05

Jul

Candice Swanepoel Pussy of the Day

Candice Swanepoel Pussy

Candice Swanepoel is no longer pregnant, which may be exciting to some of you Candice Swanepoel fans, who didn’t like seeing her pregnant the last three years, because she lets dude cum up inside her and doesn’t get abortions, so that she can start a family…..wholesome…

So she’s celebrating her no longer pregnant, and her perpetual Victoria’s Secret work, by showing you her pussy in sheer dress, to show you its not as blown out as you’d expect!

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2019

29

Mar

Candice Swanepoel Pussy Flash of the Day

Candice Swanepoel Pussy

Candice Swanepoel is in TULUM on vacation because she’s celebrating not being pregnant for the first time in 4 years…

She is boring, she hasn’t done anything interesting besides Victoria’s Secret, she never tried to break free from the evil corporation and do something innovative or interesting, because I guess bitches are fucking lazy, and this one was making well over a million dollars a year, more than she ever expected to make back home in South Africa where she was avoiding legless athletes with guns, AIDS, and black people who were revolting the insane white racism of South Africa….

But look at her now, in Mexico, in a bikini, like a legitimate socialite all at the age of 30….retirement time…and still looking hot after 2 kids…cuz some bitches just do things better.

I can’t vouch for her cunt, that shit is probably blown the fuck out…but if it’s strapped into a tight bikini bottom….how the fuck are we to know otherwise…it’s not like she’s showing any of her labia…

Instead, she is showing us this…her most interesting work that isn’t even that interesting.

Candice Swanepoel Bikini


Candice Swanepoel Bikini

Candice Swanepoel Bikini

HER TITS ARE OUT!


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2019

05

Mar

Candice Swanepoel Tits Out for Carnival of the Day

Candice Swanepoel Tits Out for Carnival

It’s MARDI GRAS Today… Where are the fucking titties?Being based in a basement apartment in the middle of fucking winter…the titties aren’t here..

I’m hoping the titties in New Orleans…the best of the American cities…hands fucking down and titties fucking out…

So here’s Candice Swanepoel, the Victoria’s Secret model, mom of two, not ready to retire…. doing her own Mardi Gras appearance for Brazilian Carnivale…which is their Mardi Gras..the day before Ash Wednesday, some Catholic shit…eat your pancakes….live large before fasting the next 40 days…depriving yourself of sex or booze or whatever you choose to deprive yourself with….probably masturbation….because it’s the closest you get to sex and you know it’s posing a problem on your psychological well being….and getting in the way of accomplishing your dreams…as all this porn is a fucking distraction…

Point being..model at Carnivale…


Candice Swanepoel Tits

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2019

25

Feb

Candice Swanepoel Hard Nipples of the Day

Candice Swanepoel nips in a beater …is probably just her just trying to stay relevant…

Every woman who taps out of her model life to make a kid or two, has a lot of time to reflect on their careers…and Candice..who has been paid very well for a long time, has got to realize that the bulk of what she’s done as really just been a promo model for a shitty sweatshop brand, with little else besides that. All the media she did, shoots she did, editorial she’s done…has all been an extension of being a promo model…

So what better way to protest the mall brand, underwear company than to walk out in protest, braless in a beater, which was a fetish of mine in the 90s when no one was doing it.

It’s the silent dis, the passive aggressive fuck you…..the teenager rebelling against her parents, this is the Patty Hearst joining the SLA….because not all heroes wear mall brand panties…

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Here’s more of her in a bikini

Candice Swanepoel Bikini

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2018

02

Aug

Mom Candice Swanepoel’s Mom Tits of the Day

Candice Swanepoel litereally shat out a kid 3 hours ago…and is in a bikini showing off her post baby body, huge tits, in a TAKE ADVANTAGE while you can, because she knows she will get as pregnant as she can as soon as she can, because she’s addicted to birthing process…or being pregnant…or who fucking knows….but I know it’d be better if her addiction was more basic…like Cocaine and starvation…but I guess you can have all those addictions all at the same time…it’s called being a model…

The point of the story is….check out those tits…mom tits…that will make you neglect her mom pussy you know is battered…and gut she hasn’t lost yet while celebrating the fact that women can bounce back from pregnancy…just not your wife who blames you for her weight gain that she’s never bothered trying to lose cuz she’s a mom now…

I suggest husbands with fat wives post this up on your fridge to motivate your slacker wife….that people with million dollar contracts and an ego….

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Posted in:Candice Swanepoel|SFW

2018

04

Apr

Candice Swanepoel’s Fat Uterus of the Day

candice swanepoel pregnant in a little red bikini

MMMMMMMMM Pregnant models….nothing hotter than a baby factory….a woman who for a decade played the hot South African blonde chick who statistically has a higher chance of having HIV, since she’s from South Africa, but I don’t know if that stat applies to white people…

What I am trying to say is that Candice, who got knocked up a year ago, clearly likes being pregnant, maybe because she gets to eat whatever she wants, or maybe because she’s a religious person and follows god’s will of have the baby when you’re knocked up, don’t abort, but back to back babies, in her family planning seems mental…

And more importantly, disgusting to look at in a bikini, maybe she thinks it’s hot or beautiful, or amazing…a miracle that fuels her narcissism..but the rest of us find it fucking gross…a parasite inside her….growing, mooching off her, only to rip through her pussy for freedom…in what will probably be soon, at least based on her massive inflated womb…ready to drop porn never my interest.

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Posted in:Candice Swanepoel|SFW