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Archive for the Candice Swanepoel Category

2012

30

Nov

Candice Swanepoel in Some Victoria’s Secret Ads of the Day

Candice Swanepoel is lovely…and I know I am pretty much buying into the advertising and marketing strategy of Victoria’s Secret, even more than I normally do when I post their girls in lingerie, contributing to their “fame”….but this time, I’ve gone so far as to post their fucking ads, with writing on them, like I am fucking working for them handing out flyers outside my local Victoria’s Secret, that I happen to be banned from, for loitering near the changing rooms one too many times…

I feel like a sucker…but I like her body too much to not whore myself to the billion dollar man.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

26

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Bikini for Instagram of the Day

Candice Swanepoel posted this bikini pic to Instagram a few hours ago and it helped me start my day off in a relatively decent hungover…rocking 3 hours of sleep…looking for more booze to calm these shakes…kinda way…you know by rubbing it in my fucking face that her life is easy, that her work involves doing what she does in her spare time….but gets paid for it….all while looking better than anything I’ve ever fucked…and I’ve fucked some decent looking prostitutes back before the recession in the early 90s….and for some reason…it doesn’t make me bitter, jealous or angry, I’m just happy she’s sharing with us….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

19

Nov

Behati Prinsloo and Candice Swanepoel are Model Friends of the Day


These are my kind of best friends ever…that I am sure are not actually best friends…but they play best friends in social media…because in reality they probably can’t stand each other, are jealous of each other and are competitive with each other, as all girls are…especially when they work for the same company modeling bikinis and lingerie…sure it makes sense to think they both feel like they won the lottery and their lives are just so fun and exciting that they can’t have a catty bone in their body…cuz they both have that stamp of approval…but society tells us another story…and historical research on women says they are smiling bulldozers…and the first chance one of them has to fuck the other’s fiance…they’ll take it…cuz it doesn’t matter where they are…or how much people like them…it matters that they are head to head competing….it’s nature’s way..

So they can pretend this is real all they want….they can play it up and pose together…but we know that when the instagram app is turned off…they are shit talking each other behind each other’s back…and they are judging each other’s bodies…poses…etc….cuz they actually fucking hate each other….since they are in the same game…

“OMG, Candice has a belly role that she always sucks in, and makes a stupid face when she models, but don’t tell her I said that”…..is the conversation when Candice leaves the room….you know it.

But they are hot…and I’m a fan of looking at their lies when their lies are half naked….

Posted in:Behati Prinsloo|Candice Swanepoel

2012

19

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Elle Brazil Nipples for Old Times of the Day


These looking familar…but I am drunk….and everything looks the fucking same 9 years into this…

I am sure I’ve seen these pictures of Candice Swanepoel in Elle Brazil showing nipple back in September….you know back BACK in September ….but they were emailed me 3 times by 3 different people I can only assume work for the Victoria’s Secret PR team, because the fashion show is coming up…and we need these girls shoved down our throats more than they already are…because Victoria’s Secret has invested a lot of money making them famous…and what their return on investment…and as long as it involves revisiting Candice Swanepoel’s nipple…shot by someone other than Victoria Secret shit photographers…I’m into it…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

13

Nov

Candice Swanepoel for Juicy Couture for Terry Richardson of the Day

As you may or may not know…I fucking love Candice Swanepoel for her personality….it’s got nothing to do with her hot fit body in a thong bikini…a body she gets paid 100s of thousands of dollars to be in shitty campaigns for Juicy Couture like this….shot by Terry Richardson…who snuck into the shit….that I call shit…cuz it fully lacks any originality like all the shit going on out there….

Now I know there are hotter girls than this tall as fuck South African model….but they aren’t the ones in this stupid video…so it’d be stupid to talk about them….wouldn’t it…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

09

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Rihanna Ass Grab at the VS Show Pics of the Day

Candice Swanepoel just posted this pic of her grabbing Rihanna’s ass at the VS fashion show…along with other pics of Rihanna saying girl crush…I am gonna assume it has something to do with Candice being african and Rihanna’s ancestors being african slaves that make her feel this connection but I am also gonna assume that Victoria’s Secret runs like a porn company…and that their girls are actually owned by the corporation….or at least their names are…because the corporation is powerful and made them the celebrities they are….taking them out of the third world….waving green cards in their faces…all while so many other girls could be doing their job…..

So I am gonna assume the instagram of all these girls is run in a little basement office at the Limited Brands head office in Ohio….but at least while pretending to be Candice…they are posting pics of her half naked….modeling from their show…to hype it up more than the infomercial already is…cuz as you know…I’m a pretty huge fan of this one….not sure why…but I’ll start with her toes and work my way up….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel|Rihanna

2012

08

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Ass and Titties for 10 Magazine of the Day

I don’t know why….but I really really like Candice Swanepoel a lot more than she likes me…I guess that’s the case with all girls…but only because girls despise me…they don’t give me a chance to charm them with my chronic masturbation, fear of commitment, love of polygamy and pornography…..

Now I liked Candice Swanepoel before today’s 10 Magazine photoshoot was released…of her wearing a black wig like a hot, mysterious, South African spy from the 60s….secret agent who lived the life of a farmer turned Victoria’s Secret model…to not make anyone suspect of her evil, information gathering, AIDS medication robbing for the sake of saving her country strategy….you know a shoot where she’s showing off a little ass and a couple little titties….but now I like her even more than I did before…cuz getting a girl naked..or in my case seeing a girl naked…cuz girls never get naked for me….always make her more valuable in my heart…as well as in my soiled underwear.

She’s a babe.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

07

Nov

Candice Swanepoel in Lingerie for Victoria’s Secret of the Day

All these pics are the fucking same….so whether I have posted them before or not is almost irrelevant…because I can tell you with certainty that I have…sure the may or may not have featured Candice Swanepoel…but the dozens of other models they have recruited over the last 10 years…but I am sure they were essentially the fucking same…because I guess you run out of ideas for a catalog shot for a panty line…

It is the Victoria’s Secret fashion show today….it is an informercial…that will be as dull as all the times before it….but that people will talk about..cuz corporations buying an hour Time slot to showcase babes in underwear is a big fucking deal in America….

First show is at 4 pm….maybe some pics will be leaked…but in the meantime…here are the dull photoshopped bullshit you’ve seen so many times before.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

06

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Rockin Stomach of the Day

The Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show is being filmed tomorrow….to be broadcast early December as an hour long paid advertisement for the billion dollar brand…to sell product for the Holidays, their biggest time of year….

I find the shit fucking offensive and boring….even though there are half naked girls who are amazing to look at in it…cuz there is something about corporate run garbage….designed to trick the lowest common human who has NBC or ABC or CBS…..by polluting them with content that is just an hour long fucking ad….disguised…..

If I was gonna watch an ad….I’d rather it be one where the models are not millionaire, but tacky stripper bitches begging me to call them at 3 in the fucking morning…you know the ghetto infomercials we all jerked off to in the 90s….the “we can have a really good time, just call me…pick up the phone”….cam girls before cams existed….

Well CANDICE SWANEPOEL is one of the majors for the brand….and she’s posting her stomach to instagram…cuz I guess she likes her fitness…and as it turns out…so do I….this is hot….but then again…I am biased…cuz I can’t stand fat chicks.///

Here she is in video some creep edited….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

05

Nov

Candice Swanepoel is Funny of the Day


So Candice Swanepoel’s handlers at Victoria’s Secret who run her instagram…had a funny typo when posting this picture of her either at her fitting…or as a placeholder or excuse to mention her fitting…

This is what they wrote:

Did my #VSfashionshow fitting today. Amazing how everyone came together after #sandy. #theshowmusthoon @victoriassecret

Since you’re an idiot…I laughed because the # The Show Must Ho On….like bitch knows she’s just a half naked prostitute with a great body making millions without having to fuck her way to the top….but by still exploiting herself…even if we are all fucking hookers…her honesty…was lovely…and just more reason to like her.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

29

Oct

Candice Swanepoel’s Legs Skateboard of the Day

There’s something I really hate about girls who skateboard….and that I have always hated about girls who skateboard….and that is that they look like idiots and usually aren’t as dainty or as lady like as I like my girls to be…but I guess that was an era before the long board made a comeback…cuz seeing Candice Swanepoel, my favorite, rocking her long athletic model legs, squatting like she was on my dick…but instead on a longboard…. all beachy and 70s erotic…and not tom boy trying to pop shove it….and I like it….but then again…I like all Candice Swanepoel has to offer…from her period…to shitting…to anything disgusting she can do..it’s all fucking gold to me…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

19

Oct

Candice Swanepoel on Set for Juicy Couture of the Day

Candice Swanepoel is venturing out from Victoria’s Secret, you know making big moves….cuz she’s a huge name, has a perfect body, and because all these companies are the fucking same bullshit, with the same shoots and probably even the same ownership….and she’s mastered the catalog campaigns…..

I like her, I get hate mail about her, people don’t seem down with white Africans making more money than they do, I guess they are still stuck in the slave era I guess, when I just wish I was stuck ball deep inside her…

To See The Rest of the Pics on Set
FOLLOW This LINK

Here she is the other day in a black dress….


To See The Rest of the Pics Partying in her Black Dress….
FOLLOW This LINK

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

16

Oct

Candice Swanepoel for Instagram of the Day

Nice and greased up and in her bathing suit for her instagram, reminding me of an erotic jelly wrestling match I once had with a fat chick, only she’s not fat at all, she’s a tiny, fit, amazing little package, who might be more of an Aids cocktail than a hotel bar cocktail kind of girl…you know the kind of girl who is shiny thanks to topical ointment for her AIDS lesions like she was Tom Hanks in that AIDS movie….thanks to getting tattoos or her ears pierced or sharing a drink or fucked by her farm’s field workers when she was 14 and rebelling….but none of that matters, with the medical advances in AIDS, you can live forever with the shit, and guilting a girl who looks like this for the rest of your life, wouldn’t be such a bad deal….not that any of us are fucking her…but you get what I am saying and if you don’t…it is that she’s lovely.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

15

Oct

Candice Swanepoel and Anja Rubik Topless for W of the Day

Models and titties are a couple of my favorite things…cuz models, depsite being whores in their own right….getting paid to get naked for fashion, are a little more classy and luxurious about it andc aren’t tacky as shit about it….looking like actual whores, straight from the trailer park…..

More importantly, models are lean and elegant, instead of looking like their topless model counter parts that get naked for money while looking like fake tanned tranny strippers who are working as hard as they can to make money to pay for the operation to remove their dick…

So here are models like Candice Swanepoel, Anja Rubik and some other vagina I would pay to masturbate on their panties….rockin’ out for W Magazine…the November Issue….good times.

Posted in:Anja Rubik|Candice Swanepoel

2012

12

Oct

Candice Swanepoel Boring for Victoria’s Secret of the Day

Victoria’s Secret made a couple of billion dollars in sales last year….and I expect more out of their catalog shoots…even if they made them more like a hip hop video with helicopters and fucking Rolls Royces in the background….maybe a few hip hop video girls twerking…I mean anything but this standard, constant, catalog shoot that I jerked off to in the fucking late 80s, with a different babe I want to impregnate as the star….

I guess it is just uninspired and I like things to be a little more revolutionary….

This why change a good thing shit is shit.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel