I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Candice Swanepoel Category

2012

17

Dec

Candice Swanepoel’s in Bikini of the Day

OH MY GOD CANDICE SWANEPOEL IS MODELING BIKINIS…..SHOCKING BECAUSE THAT’S ALL THIS BITCH DOES…..Seriously, she needs to tattoo Property of Victoria’s Secret on her fucking forhead, asssuming she doesn’t already have that around her asshole, which happens to be where they extendable plug of her robot ass comes out for charging…you see cuz after much investigation, it has been decided, that there is no way this bitch is real…..

Here are the pics – cuz 40 Victoria’s Secret posts today wasn’t enough….it’s Christmas people and we need to brain wash you into shopping there…even they they only pay us in half naked bitch pics and not a portion of their billions.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

17

Dec

Victoria’s Secret Holiday Campaign of the Day

Victoria’s Secret have got me from the fucking balls….they have made their models celebrities…so that everytime one of them tweets some cleavage, I jump like it is news….they have set themselves up that every photoshoot they go on has paparazzi there to cover it….and that every catalog they put out….the pics get released to…all in efforts to make all of us continuously talk about them…and the international pussy they recruit….and everytime I post on these evil corporate assholes…I know exactly what I am doing…I am buying into their strategy like a mindless idiot…but the tits…and the girls…is just too good to ignore…

Here’s their holiday push….

Posted in:Barbara Palvin|Candice Swanepoel|Miranda Kerr

2012

14

Dec

Candice Swanepoel and Maryna Linchuk are Bikini Models of the Day

Candice Swanepoe and Maryna Linchuk are modeling for Victoria’s Secret, because they are both probably owned by Victoria’s Secret, you know third world babes who signed their life away for the dream, and I am okay with that, cuz I dig their tall, fit, half nakedness….and that’s why I follow them on instagram…where I leave comments like

Wow, you should look into becoming a model

Cuz their fans get so angry that I don’t know who they are…when in fact I do know who they are…as I have had sex with both of them…at the same time…in my mind…thanks to these pics they’ve posted to social media….and by “they”…i mean the marketing staff at Victoria’s Secret…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel|Maryna Linchuk

2012

13

Dec

Candice Swanepoel Ass in a Bikini of the Day

Guess who’s on the beach of St Barts shooting for Victoria’s Secret….Candice Swanepoel…cuz Victoria’s Secret fucking own her…and may have even made her in an African lap somewhere…you know like some kind of billion dollar robot that won’t age and that will never leave them…and investment that helps them make 30 billion dollars a year in sales….which is totally fucking ridiculous if you think about it…that’s like 2 billion pairs of underwear a fucking year….do people really need that many pairs of underwear…..I mean I’m not complaining cuz the evil empire that is Victoria’s Secret has given me this lovely angel to make love to myself / my screen / my MONKEY SPANKER to….which is enough distraction for me to furhter investigate their criminal human traffic robot making practices….


TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

11

Dec

Candice Swanepoel’s Victoria’s Secret Holiday Lingerie of the Day

I ran into an old friend who I guess visits the site every once in a while, because he asked me why the fuck I always post on Candice Swanepoel, and that before my site he had no idea who she was, and that even now that he knows who she is, he doesn’t really get why I bother posting her catalog pics, he finds it weird and a little excessive…to whice I say…this is only my second Candice Swanepoel post today, and if I do 20 posts a day, that’s only 10 percent of my content devoted to her, which is practically nothing, I mean sure, I could have done posts on the countless other twats who ignore me on social media, you know giving this bitch no play at all, but have you seen her half naked body? This shit is legendary….and that’s all the justifying I’m gonna do about Candice Swanepoel posts til the end of time…cuz if I had my way this site would be the offical Candice Swanepoel fan club…you know the kind of site that gets me arrested when I start following her around the world for exclusive content…you know passion that is misunderstood as stalking….

Here are the hot body pics….for the evil Victoria’s Secret corporation….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

11

Dec

Candice Swanepoel Athletic for VSX of the Day

Candice Swanepoel has a fit fucking body….sure her career depends on it…and she’s living large, making easy fucking money, that is in fact stupid money, because of that career that depends on her body….motivating her 20 days off a month to be spent working on her fitness….cuz it’s the best option for her….cuz she, like anyone else, oulda chose cake and candy and fries….working a desk job….like so many potentially hot girls if they weren’t buried in disgusting….and I think we should thank her for taking the right path…cuz a body like this is a glorious thing to stare at and without it…we have nothing…and there’s no point in living…maybe I’m just being dramatic….the HOLIDAYS GET ME EMOTIONAL …..

Here are the pics….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

06

Dec

Candice Swanepoel’s Ass in a Thong for Instagram of the Day


The highlight of the Victoria’s Secret informercial was not Candice Swanepoel sucking the dick of the corporation for making her matter…pretty much saying she owed her life to them like a scared battered wife…

But it was listening to her talk…cuz that accent just makes her that much better….and trust me that’s saying a lot coming from me…cuz I hate when models talk…it takes away from their whole being half naked modeling where they belong..

She posted this ass shot to instagram…reminding us that her body fucking matters….and she’s better at doing Victoria’s Secret catalog pics than Victoria’s Secret…cuz Victoria’s Secret despite selling thongs…can’t showcase thongs…INSANE but not as insane as how good this is…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

04

Dec

Candice Swanepoel’s Ass in a Little Dress of the Day

Candice Swanepoel is at the stage in her career where she’s pretty secure with herself…she’s got the millions of dollars in her bank account…her people are likely turning down jobs everyday…she realizes she looks good enough for people to pay her instead of all the other bitches dying for her jobs….so she can get away with posting pics that don’t flatter her…because who really gives a fuck about her nose, or her broad shoulders…them shits make money….especially when all I’m really looking at is her cute little ass…

All this to say…keep up the good social networking woman…cuz you’re winning at it…or at least winning at giving boners…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

30

Nov

Candice Swanepoel in Some Victoria’s Secret Ads of the Day

Candice Swanepoel is lovely…and I know I am pretty much buying into the advertising and marketing strategy of Victoria’s Secret, even more than I normally do when I post their girls in lingerie, contributing to their “fame”….but this time, I’ve gone so far as to post their fucking ads, with writing on them, like I am fucking working for them handing out flyers outside my local Victoria’s Secret, that I happen to be banned from, for loitering near the changing rooms one too many times…

I feel like a sucker…but I like her body too much to not whore myself to the billion dollar man.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

26

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Bikini for Instagram of the Day

Candice Swanepoel posted this bikini pic to Instagram a few hours ago and it helped me start my day off in a relatively decent hungover…rocking 3 hours of sleep…looking for more booze to calm these shakes…kinda way…you know by rubbing it in my fucking face that her life is easy, that her work involves doing what she does in her spare time….but gets paid for it….all while looking better than anything I’ve ever fucked…and I’ve fucked some decent looking prostitutes back before the recession in the early 90s….and for some reason…it doesn’t make me bitter, jealous or angry, I’m just happy she’s sharing with us….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

19

Nov

Behati Prinsloo and Candice Swanepoel are Model Friends of the Day


These are my kind of best friends ever…that I am sure are not actually best friends…but they play best friends in social media…because in reality they probably can’t stand each other, are jealous of each other and are competitive with each other, as all girls are…especially when they work for the same company modeling bikinis and lingerie…sure it makes sense to think they both feel like they won the lottery and their lives are just so fun and exciting that they can’t have a catty bone in their body…cuz they both have that stamp of approval…but society tells us another story…and historical research on women says they are smiling bulldozers…and the first chance one of them has to fuck the other’s fiance…they’ll take it…cuz it doesn’t matter where they are…or how much people like them…it matters that they are head to head competing….it’s nature’s way..

So they can pretend this is real all they want….they can play it up and pose together…but we know that when the instagram app is turned off…they are shit talking each other behind each other’s back…and they are judging each other’s bodies…poses…etc….cuz they actually fucking hate each other….since they are in the same game…

“OMG, Candice has a belly role that she always sucks in, and makes a stupid face when she models, but don’t tell her I said that”…..is the conversation when Candice leaves the room….you know it.

But they are hot…and I’m a fan of looking at their lies when their lies are half naked….

Posted in:Behati Prinsloo|Candice Swanepoel

2012

19

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Elle Brazil Nipples for Old Times of the Day


These looking familar…but I am drunk….and everything looks the fucking same 9 years into this…

I am sure I’ve seen these pictures of Candice Swanepoel in Elle Brazil showing nipple back in September….you know back BACK in September ….but they were emailed me 3 times by 3 different people I can only assume work for the Victoria’s Secret PR team, because the fashion show is coming up…and we need these girls shoved down our throats more than they already are…because Victoria’s Secret has invested a lot of money making them famous…and what their return on investment…and as long as it involves revisiting Candice Swanepoel’s nipple…shot by someone other than Victoria Secret shit photographers…I’m into it…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

13

Nov

Candice Swanepoel for Juicy Couture for Terry Richardson of the Day

As you may or may not know…I fucking love Candice Swanepoel for her personality….it’s got nothing to do with her hot fit body in a thong bikini…a body she gets paid 100s of thousands of dollars to be in shitty campaigns for Juicy Couture like this….shot by Terry Richardson…who snuck into the shit….that I call shit…cuz it fully lacks any originality like all the shit going on out there….

Now I know there are hotter girls than this tall as fuck South African model….but they aren’t the ones in this stupid video…so it’d be stupid to talk about them….wouldn’t it…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

09

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Rihanna Ass Grab at the VS Show Pics of the Day

Candice Swanepoel just posted this pic of her grabbing Rihanna’s ass at the VS fashion show…along with other pics of Rihanna saying girl crush…I am gonna assume it has something to do with Candice being african and Rihanna’s ancestors being african slaves that make her feel this connection but I am also gonna assume that Victoria’s Secret runs like a porn company…and that their girls are actually owned by the corporation….or at least their names are…because the corporation is powerful and made them the celebrities they are….taking them out of the third world….waving green cards in their faces…all while so many other girls could be doing their job…..

So I am gonna assume the instagram of all these girls is run in a little basement office at the Limited Brands head office in Ohio….but at least while pretending to be Candice…they are posting pics of her half naked….modeling from their show…to hype it up more than the infomercial already is…cuz as you know…I’m a pretty huge fan of this one….not sure why…but I’ll start with her toes and work my way up….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel|Rihanna

2012

08

Nov

Candice Swanepoel’s Ass and Titties for 10 Magazine of the Day

I don’t know why….but I really really like Candice Swanepoel a lot more than she likes me…I guess that’s the case with all girls…but only because girls despise me…they don’t give me a chance to charm them with my chronic masturbation, fear of commitment, love of polygamy and pornography…..

Now I liked Candice Swanepoel before today’s 10 Magazine photoshoot was released…of her wearing a black wig like a hot, mysterious, South African spy from the 60s….secret agent who lived the life of a farmer turned Victoria’s Secret model…to not make anyone suspect of her evil, information gathering, AIDS medication robbing for the sake of saving her country strategy….you know a shoot where she’s showing off a little ass and a couple little titties….but now I like her even more than I did before…cuz getting a girl naked..or in my case seeing a girl naked…cuz girls never get naked for me….always make her more valuable in my heart…as well as in my soiled underwear.

She’s a babe.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel