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Archive for the Alessandra Ambrosio Category

2013

07

Mar

Alessandra Ambrosio Bikinis it Up for Money of the Day

Unlike you, Alessandra Ambrosio gets paid to prance around in her bikini….so you’d think looking at pics of her in a bikini would be uneventful, typical, even boring….because we’ve seen it all before…but I like to think of it as watching a great juggling act more than once…or listening to guy playing the same guitar solo on repeat….only the bikini version…

Sure it’s familiar…it has been done….but it just speaks to your soul like a magical angel sent from heaven to watch over….more importantly….it offers us a baseline to compare the women in our lives to….to feel inadequate….but content knowing that this kind of mom body exists…even if the closest we will get to it is masturbating to it….

She’s a babe….she’s in a bikini….she’s getting paid…and we’re all assholes for celebrating it like it matters…but I’ll still celebrate it like it matters….cuz I have nothing else going on.

Here’s the video…


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2013

20

Feb

Alessandra Ambrosio for London Fog of the Day

There is something totally erotic about a girl…or a model…nude in her raincoat….like some kind of creepy flasher outside the playground….only way thinner, more luxurious, classy and with less cock….

Alessandra Ambrosio, a lingerie model by trade, is the spokesperson for London Fog…and she brings a nice amount of that half naked sexiness to the mix…but maybe…just maybe I’m a pervert who finds anything with a vagina…even just an alleged vagina….exciting….even when passed out and covered in feces……

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2013

12

Feb

Alessandra Ambrosio Amazing Nipples for Terry Richardson of the DAy

This video and photoshoot of Alessandra Ambrosio in Terry Richardson’s studio doing a fun little video of her breaking through a photographer’s backdrop…..while wearing a hot little wife beater…with her nipples shining through….is a reminder to that Alessandra Ambrosio is very real…..for that fat chick who told me that Victoria’s Secret models aren’t real, especially post pregnancy but that Adele and Kelly Clarkson are real, and not just real lazy and real eaters, really into food….

I don’t even hate that this girl has a kid…cuz she puts work into her body and shit…I’m into staring at it….

Amazing.

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2013

11

Feb

Alessandra Ambrosio for Victoria’s Secret of the Day

Since 90 percent of my life is spent on the internet…and hating fat chicks…it is only natural that I get in fights with fat chicks on the regular because fat chicks, as proven from all their eating, have big fucking mouths….and last night, when mocking Adele, hoping the stage was reinforced, someone stepped up and said that she just had a kid, give her a break, as if she wasn’t a tank prior to the kid….to which my rebuttal was all the Victoria’s Secret models who get back in shape a month after they have kids, cuz they don’t let themselves go, and they put fucking work in…..and porky writes back “Victoria’s Secret Models aren’t real”….no bitch, they are real, they just aren’t lazy fucking pigs who blame their awesome model bodies for giving lazy fucking pigs negative body images, cuz instead of training and eating well, they’re at the fucking donut shop….

Now I can’t attest to their vaginas being real awesome after the babies….but I can say the rest of them is and sometimes that’s a decent trade off….

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio

2013

01

Feb

Alessandra Ambrosio Bikini Photoshoot of the Day

Alessandra Ambrosio is a mom, an activity that I think ruins women on all fronts….cuz pregnancy has no glow…they just like to think that’s a glow…to make it a less disgusting experience….an experience that makes families, but rips apart perfectly good vagina…..

Seriously…I fear all things baby…..

But for some reason, a reason I call her awesoem body, I can see past that horrible torture she’s done to herself…kinda like eating out a hot girl you know has herpes, cuz it just doesn’t matter in the grand schemes of things…cuz she’s so hot….


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2013

07

Jan

Alessandra Ambrosio is a Babe of the Day

Alessandra Ambrosio is back home, or somewhere south enough that it is summer, and she’s taken to social media to show the world that she looks awesome in a bikini or bathing suit at all fucking times…because that’s her job and like a doctor…you can’t just turn that shit off when you’re on vacation….it’s ingrained in your fucking core….and you’re so good at the shit that even when a retard takes your pic with a fucking polaroid he found in his retard basement….she looks like she’s worth the 1000 dollars an hour her agency charges….in what some may think is insane since she doesn’t even have sex at that price…but that isn’t insane cuz the fashion world needs girls like Alessandra Ambrosio to make us fucking care about their underwear….either way…she needs me to write her love songs all day and all night…but instead…I just post smut cuz someone’s gotta do it…and that someone is me.

Here are some pics of her hot friends…..to remind us that going to Brazil looks like fun…

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2012

31

Dec

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Shitty Bikini Pics of the Day


Hey everybody…it is New Years Eve and I’ve been drinking for the last 1800 or more days…but today is more special than the last…cuz tonight…the world will be celebrating…and in Asia and Australia the world has already celebrated….and what better way to ring it in that to look at Alessandra Ambrosio’s body…or half her body…self shot like some kind of cam girl, attention seeking teen….bitch who doesn’t get paid a lot of money for this normally…you know looking for exposure…and praise…when bitch’s bank account does that for her every day…FUN…

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio

2012

17

Dec

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Bikini in St Barts of the Day

Mom body has probably never looked this good…here is my favorite Instagram girl who ignores the fuck out of my comments…and who may even censor my comments…like I don’t have feelings…and like my words don’t matter…even if they are praising just how lovely she is….but I don’t let it get me down, cuz girls have been ignoring me and pretending I don’t exist for the last 4 decades…and not only am I used to it…it makes masturbating to them more fun, passionate and angry….

She’s in a bikini, in St Barts, for Victoria’s Secret, cuz I guess they have a compound there, and I guess that’s what Victoria’s Secret models do, which I guess isn’t all that exicting, but it’s better than looking at fat mom’s at the coffee shop gossiping and talking about how their stitches from their birthing pussy haven’t dissolved yet…or about their love for the cakes they are eating…you know…typical mom shit isn’t this good…so I am glad mom Ambrosio in her bikini happened this past weekend….


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Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio

2012

05

Dec

Alessandra Ambrosio Hot for Made in Brazil of the Day

Alessandra Ambrosio is rolling around on the beach for Made in Brazil….a magazine and photoshoot that reminds me of the one thing I wish that was made in brazil…an Alessandra and Jesus Martinez creampie in a seedy hotel room…or her dripping off my face…or really…anything sexual with this lovely mom who has the body of someone who isn’t a mom…

That said, I dig brazil…and I dig brazilians, even the trannies are ok…and I am not just because of their Bum Bum contests…

Here are the Ambrosio pics…

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio