I don’t know what is more shocking. that I am doing a post on Amy Smart, a 37 year old actress who barely existed even at her prime, or that she’s gone off and gone fat, like a doughy piece of shit that has been left in the corner of hollywood, but who isn’t wearing a bra and who has a hard nipple, making her almost relevant, despite how unfortunate her weight gain has been at selecting body parts in which to gain wait….I mean shit, this post would almost be hot if that belly was more of a set of tits….
Here are some pictures of Rose McGowan and Amy Smart at the premiere of their new movie, it toally feels like it’s still 1999. Unfortunately, I don’t. The last 11 years have destroyed me physically, mentally, and emotionally…I think I just shat out my liver and I haven’t stopped coughing in 6 months. I am broke, unemployed and married to a fat pig. My stepdaughters are no longer 16 and 17 and a lot has happened. Not to mention lookin’ at these girls 10 years later….looks 10 years later…it’s one of those putting your wife in a school girl outfit…if you can find one in her size…it just doesn’t work…it just isn’t an actual school girl and no amount of booze can make you think it is….
I can only assume that Amy Smart just freshly gave birth to her first kid at the age of 34 with her boyfriend she’s been with for the last 15 years…because that would tap into my milk filled tits fetish…paritally cuz I like getting reward for all my hard work when sucking a bitch…except whent that reward comes from a 45 year old hooker who still lactates from a late term abortion she had 25 years earlier…cuz that shit just grosses me out…but also cuz I like seeing
I can also assume that she has real uneven tits…the kind of tit you’d probably want to get sorted out with surgery or at least inserts…cuz the left one means business and the right one is in fucking hiding….She definitely doesn’t have the same body as she did in Varsity Blues when she did that Whip Cream Bikini ….but I’m kinda liking how this cotton dress is falling on her fat mom after breast cancer surgery body….or at least the tit that is left part…and I guess that’s why I am posting this, cuz it sure as hell not because I think se’s relevant in any way….I do it all for the titties..or in Amy Smart’s case…I do it all for the left titty….
I wish I card about seeing a nobody acturess in her booty short underwear and having her tit fall out of her shirt on the set of some shitty movie, but the truth is that I am not 14, my computer has access to tons of porn and for as little as 5 dollars a day, I can see stripper tit or convince local sluts to re-enact this shit for me in exchange for some booze. I don’t give a fuck about Amy Smart and she could be getting fucked up the ass and cum farting all over a dude’s face and I still wouldn’t give a fuck about Amy Smart, but you like her and that’s enough reason for me to post this.
This nipple tape bullshit reminds me of every hipster event I’ve accidentally walked into where girls think it’s not very lesbionic to put electrical tape on their nipples as they wear their mesh shirts. I don’t really fully understand that shit and I don’t really understand how this dude’s job consists of putting tape on a half-famous bitches tits, but it reminds me of the bus boy at the strip club who has to get on stage and shift change to disinfect the shit, only probably less hazardous.
I had this idea of going to the toy store the other day because I figured it would be a good place to be inappropriate. I walked around lookin’ for new mothers to harrass. The best I pulled off yesterday was taking one of those new born baby dolls and going up to the mom and asking her some trivial bullshit question that I knew would have an long drawn out response because new mom’s love talking about themselves as they hang out in their home in their post-partem depression while their husbands stay at at work late banging new pussy. Anyway, as this unsuspecting mom started going off on her rant about formula babies versus breast fed babies I slowly started undressing the doll and touching it inappropriately until she cut the conversation short, didn’t know whether to tell me off, call the authorities or just deal with her own awkwardness and it was funny.
Now I don’t approve of pedophiles and I think it’s some serious sick shit, but I do approve of making people feel ridiculous awkward in seemingly innocent places for a good time using a doll as a prop. I guess I consider creeping out a toy store an accomplishment an accomplishment Amy Smart probably felt when she landed a job that only had one half-assed taped up tit sex scene in it….because covering her nipples seems to be what she’s typecast for. It doesn’t matter – just look at the pics.
Some Tagged Pics Thanks To The Nice People at the Paparazzi Agencies…..Because They Want You To Know Who Owns These Pictures…Kinda Like The Time My Friend Gave Some Slut Herpes So She Would Never Forget Him…Only Not Quite as Nice of a Gesture….
So this is that meth-head Jodie Sweetin who was Stephanie Tanner on Full House when she was a kid. She always took the backseat to the Olsens and from the way I see it, she was just an accessory to making them billionaires, while leaving her in the corner hating herself so much, unable to get work and turning to smoking meth. Think about it, you’re on the same show as these cunts and they don’t even have a fucking talking role because they are still in diapers, but for some reason they still build a fucking empire out of it, while you just fizzle off into nowhere, living in your parents shitty house they bought with your money, your big tits and all, you’d be hurting too…
Reality is that her tits are so fucking stacked that there is no way she was ever really addicted to meth. The way she can barely fit into her jeans makes me think it was some E! True Hollywood lie to get her back into the public eye, land her some interviews on TV and in Magazines and give her the opportunity to show the world she’s still around and by still around I mean her massive tits. This Bitch is all big and bubbly and trying to make a comeback. all the meth addicts I’ve known have had ratty fucking skin, emaciated meth bodies, no tits, yellow meth eyes and have been shaky, speedy, itchy anxiety ridden. I don’t think there is anyway that this bitch was on meth, I think it’s a way to launch a K-Mart product line and series of children’s books.
Either way, she is at the opening of Retard Harry Morton’s restaurant/club called Pink Taco. He’s Lohan’s ex boyfriend, son of the owner of Hard Rock Cafe, Grandson of Morton’s Steakhouse and I am assuming that dude wasn’t inspired by Lohan when he came up with this fucking stupid name, because if he had the place would be called “The Big Spotted and Scabby Red Cunt That Smells Like Shit From Rotten Cum From Other Dudes She had Raw Dog Sex With and Let Drop Load in Her and a Tampon She Forgot in there a Month Ago when She Was Drunk”, I don’t think that would have been so good for business, but he’s a rich kid, he doesn’t need the business to make money, it’s just his dad’s way of giving him something to keep his son busy with…
That Lohan Vagina joke was probably pretty obvious, but I am hungover again and just trying to get through the day….
Other People in Attendance of His Big Opening:
Jessica Alba With Her Extreme Face Close-Up
Some Chick Named Nikki Griffin I want to See Naked