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Archive for the Ashlee Simpson Category

2013

26

Jun

Staring into Ashlee Simpson’s Soul of the Day

I am not a religious man, but every now and then I feel the need to start my day, by staring into the soul of a woman, via her vagina. It helps me question and understand our existence, you know from the source, because real enlightenment comes from knowing what it all means…and what better way to do that than to use Today’s Vagina, despite being low quality and wrapped in a bikini bottom, provided by Ashlee Simpson, the original Teen Mom, I guess in a pose inviting new sperm in for another round…cuz her career’s not quite as lucrative as her uterus…

That’s all I have to say about that…in fact, I’ve said too much.

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Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2013

06

Feb

Ashlee Simpson’s Upskirt of the Day

The old timer blogger in me…who build my empire on girls flashing their panties, having sex tapes, and nipple slips….kinda appreciates Ashlee Simpson’s old timer efffort to get noticed for the first time since her singing career exploded….due to acid reflux…..but the scientist in me wishes there were no panties…just so I could see how much damage her single mother’s vagina took in the natural disaster that was becoming a single mother….you see cuz panties just aren’t hardcore enough for me…but scars on labia always will be pushing the limit and letting the world know you’re here and ready to get down.


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Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2012

27

Dec

Ashlee Simpson’s Teen Mom Ass in a Bikini Bottom of the Day

This is just typical behavior from a girl who’s parents are going through a divorce cuz her dad is gay, you know spreading her ass on the internet in a bikini bottom, just cock teasing for perverts like you to give her attention her daddy never gave her cuz she had a vagina, but more importantly, because she wasn’t the cute daughter relatives wanted to molest, but I guess we already knew that back when she was baby making in her teens to get attention…..and now all I can think is “thanks for not showing us lip, cuz there’s no way that vagina isn’t as ravaged as you’d imagine it would be, thanks to the whole birthing process….decent legs though…

Just be glad this isn’t Jessica Simpson’s ass…because…it will probably eat you like an all you can eat buffet….you know taking food in from both ends just to get it inside her….and not in a good way…in an obese chick way….


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Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2011

16

Nov

Ashlee Simpson Not Wearing Pants of the Day

Aslee Simpson is at the level of fame where I write she’s not wearing pants, and the video or picture next to it is of her fisting herself listening to a Jessica Simpson medley of song, because Jessica Simpson is what made her, from the shitty albums, to the lip syncing…to pretty much everything she’s ever done….including the Fall Out Boy dude who knocked her up…..and really she only stayed in the media because it was fun to mock Jessica Simpson cuz Ashlee had everything she wanted….the younger sister was married, was skinny, had a baby…all things that Jessica couldn’t get as she got fatter and fatter…and now that she’s pregnant, with some K-Fed of her own….Ashlee Simpson just doesn’t matter…

She just looks like a lesbian with a pointy nose out to buy organic food or some shit…and that’s BORING. She needs to learn how to make pantsless better….

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2011

26

Sep

Ashlee Simpson Bikini Pictures of the Day

[I CAN'T POST THE ASS IN BIKINI PICS BECAUSE THE PAPARAZZI HATE ME - BUT CLICK THE BELOW LINK - IT IS AMAZING]

Here is Ashlee Simpson’s mom ass that was wasted on the homosexual she married because he was popular at the time and she thought it’d help her get her career that never was back on track before getting knocked up one night when his semen dripped out of her ass after he dressed her like a man, leading to her having a baby, because she’s a good christian who doesn’t do the whole aborition thing, before realizing like she was LeAnn Rimes, that life is better when your husband isn’ gay….

Bringing us up to date on this Jessica Simpson sibling who was always in her very large fat chick shadow, who put so much effort to break out, and who now has a body that’s so tight, she deserves to be the star child, partially cuz she doesn’t eat all the family food….but also cuz this ass is ridiculous….

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Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2011

14

Sep

Ashlee Simpson’s Cleavage of the Day

Here are some Ashlee Simpson, young mom who was married to a lesbian, possible inseminated by a turkey baster, because as far as I’m concerned her ex-husband has a huge vagina….showing some tit and I’m just posting them cuz I almost forgot this bitch existed…you know Jessica Simpson’s shadow who was more of a joke hanging on as hard as she can than anything else….some nose job who I would only get with to get to her fat older sister….

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2011

20

Jul

Ashlee Simpson is a Mom in Some Little Shorts of the Day

I don’t know why I posted these pictures…I think I thought she had more tits…or that her little shorts would be as exciting as the little shorts I see everytime I leave my house…from the 19 year old in little skimpy shorts who was dry humping her boyfriend in the park, ass out, making me practically cum my pants, to I mean every other girl this summer who realizes that ass cheeks hanging out of their shit like it was the 70s is a fucking good thing….I didn’t think she was on a walk with what looks like her shrink, or AA sponsor, or some lesbian bitch she’s decided to date because she was married to a homo and the level of testosterone, sex and strap ons was essentially the same…..so dyke she doesn’t get her period anymore kind of thing…

What it comes down to is Ashlee Simpson peaked when she got caught lip syncing….and here is the damaged mom goods in some boring pics that don’t even compare to what’s going on outside in REAL LIFE….

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2010

08

Nov

Ashlee Simpson Has No Ass in Jeans of the Day

I don’t know where Ashlee Simpson left her ass, but I know it’s not in her pants. Maybe Jessica ate it when her team of chefs couldn’t make her a pulled pork sandwich at 4 am…cuz there were no 24 hour grocery stores around…but more importantly because they were ignoring her calls due to extreme exhaustion from all the work she’s been putting them through with her emotional eating that she’s embraced as part of who she is lately…It’s just not humanly possible to keep up with those kinds of demands….

The good news for Jessica is that country music chicks from Texas are allowed to be fat…instead of starving herself for the LA scene and the general public she turned her back on cuz we expect her to be the busty hot chick we used to jerk off to…country fans are more loyal, less superficial, and used to obesity…if you’ve ever been to Wal Mart in a Texan suburb, you’ll get what I’m saying….

The bad news for her is that she has to buy two seats on the plane when she travels commercial….

The good news for Ashlee is that genetics haven’t bogged her down and blown her up into a fucking big and she doesn’t have to drop the “baby weight” excuse every bitch uses….But the bad news for her is that she looks like a dude from behind…especially with the new haircut…which is great news for her husband Pete “Fall Out Boy” Wentz, you know cuz he’s gay and I guess that makes him the winner in all this.

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2010

03

Nov

Decades of Denim Event I Wasn’t Invited To Brought Out Some Winners of the Day

There was an event that brought out some real huge celebrities….you know the kind of event that if the Taliban knew was goin’ on…they’d fly a fucking plane into the shit…you know cuz the world would not be able to function without these key players…they are combined as useless as the time you bought condoms before your Cancun springbreak trip, thinking you’d totally get laid cuz everyone there does, you know that finally your luck would turn around thanks to drug and booze fueled insanity…but unfortuantely, that wasn’t the fuckin’ case…however it was 10 years ago and you still have that unopened box of condoms cuz you’re not just a loser on Springbreak homeboy…

Cheryl Tiegs See Through of the Day

Ashlee Simpson was there lookin’ awkward

Cassie Scerbo showed off some tit…No, I’ve never heard of Cassie Scerbo either, but she has cleavage and that balances out staring at those pics of Ashlee Simpson…

Eliza Bennett had a bit of a see through…No, I’ve never heard of Eliza Bennett before…but whatever…

The only bitch worth noticing was Rose McGowan, but I’m biased, I always think she’s lookin’ hot…and that alone makes her very very fucking useful….

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Cassie Scerbo|Cheryl Tiegs|Eliza Bennett|Gillian Jacobs|Rose McGowan

2010

08

Sep

Ashlee Simpson’s Legs in a See Through of the Day

Ashlee Simpson is doing a hell of a lot better than her fat as fuck sister…I like to think this is a good old case of sabotage. You know after years of being on the back burner in the family, doing what Jessica wanted, spending birthdays and Christmas where Jessica happened to be performing, pretty much putting everyone’s life on hold for Jessica….only to decide to launch her own career, that was a fucking disaster, because no one told her that just cuz your sister is liked, wanted and famous, doesn’t mean you will be…pretty humiliating herself and making her resent and hate Jessica even more….You know, secretly happy when Jessica’s marriage failed, and when Jessica couldn’t land a man, or keep a man to have a family with…realizing how rewarding it was when Jessica finally got what she fucking deserved….and Ashlee came out as the fucking winner, with a happy marriage to a faggot, a baby, money and a good life….that Jessica just can’t get. Finally, something Ashlee is good at. Finally the prize in the family….

I can only assume that Ashlee is partially responsible for this, you know melting a stick of butter in Jessica’s protein shakes, or having eating competitions with her to get the ball rolling, only to puke secretly, leaving Jessica to blow the fuck up…It is the only explanation for Jessica Simpson’s new fat and horrible body ….


Here are some pictures of her rocking out at the US Open Cuz It’s Good To Be Her Now That She’s the Prize of the Family Even Though She’s Retarded
GO

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2010

30

Aug

Ashlee Simpson’s Barely Used Ass and Legs of the Day

Here are some pictures of Ashlee Simpson walking chin first in some ridiculous heels, cuz everyone knows ridiculous heels make your mom legs and mom ass look a lot fucking better, even if your mom legs and mom ass are hardly used, since the man you got knocked up by is a total faggot who only likes when he is the one things are being inserted into…

She’s still come a long way from being the lip syncing joke trying to make a name for herself, stuck in her sister’s shadow, but I like to think her sister’s over-eating ha s a lot to do with that…

Either way, legs are legs, and the fact this pussy is practically virgin, despite having had a kid pass through it, not only confuses me, cuz mom pussy by default is supposed to be haggard pussy, but kinda turns me on….

So as long as she keeps up this chin first whore strut, I’m down to watch.

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2010

02

Aug

Ashlee Simpson on All Fours on the Beach of the Day

Ashlee Simpson and her gay married wife Pete Wentz brought their Gaybies to the beach for some photoshoot for out magazine, showing the world that Gay people can have babies that grow up to be normal thru good parenting, and that Ashlee Simpson is seriously craving cock, cuz I know any bitch crawling around all fours is eager to get a serious dicking, especially when her husband is a homosexual who doesn’t fuck her….and here are the barely exciting pics….

I figure the only way to make this Simpson post complete is to include some pictures of Jessica Simpson trying to have what her little sister who was always in her shadow has with some guy who is trying to come to terms with the fact that he’s banging Jessica Simpson, cuz everyone knows banging Jessica Simpson, no matter how fat she gets is amazing and makes good financial sense….

I am not sure why she looks so sad in these pictures, but I can only assume it has something to do with this new boyfriend/user eating the last donut…

Pics via Fame
Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2010

18

Jun

Ashlee Simpson Reminds Jessica Simpson That She Sucks of the Day

Not only has Ashlee Simpson landed a man…or what is marketed as a man…but she’s also got married, had kids, relaunched her career, but most importantly…is not a fat slob eating away her sadness from how life has wronged her with her gay Yoko Ono trying to force feed the donuts down her throat so that he gets all the glory…Take that Jessica Simpson…Remember when Ashlee was the latch on sister who felt insignificant in your shadow. Revenge is Bittersweet…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2010

07

Apr

Ashlee Simpson Shows Off her Useless Mom Legs of the Day

You know it is a boring day when I post pictures of Ashlee Simpson’s legs in pantyhose like shit is hot…a seriously boring fucking day….

The only thing partially hot about this girl is that she let a dude cum inside her, but when you remember it is Pete Wentz’s cum, it kinda ruins the excitement….and really most girls let guys cum inside them anyway, it’s one of those things that you find in nature and instinctively we do…and just because most girl’s I’ve fucked without a condom yelled at me everytime I did it on purpose but pretended was accidental, doesn’t mean there aren’t girls out there begging for loads to be dropped inside them to make them feel loved or some shit…and then there’s the whole baby has ripped that pussy apart shit…and her fucking busted up face that gives Jessica Simpson low self esteem because she can’t land a man but her baby sister can, not that Pete Wentz is a man, but you get what I am saying….

Here are the miserable pics….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Mom Legs

2010

01

Apr

Ashlee Simpson Shows Off her Legs to Distract from her Face of the Day

I have never been turned on by Ashlee Simpson. The only good thing about her was that that she was the ugly sister and ugly sisters try harder to make you cum than the hotter sister or even the average girl because they’ve got a complex and spent their lives feeling second rate and second rate always picks up the slack for being the ugly sister by servicing men better if they aren’t the kind of second rate that kills themselves cuz they can’t deal with being second rate…..I figured the only guys she’d get would be no names trying to get close to Jessica Simpson, but she proved me wrong by marrying and getting knocked up by some homosexual possibly because Jessica Simpson turned fat and battered looking, making the calls to Ashlee Simpson totally die down…or maybe she just wanted a guy she could share her clothes with…and I guess none of that matters and what does matter is that she knows to show off her thin legs, to distract us from her face and to find female escort that is even uglier than her to make her look less ugly….and that effort shouldn’t go unnoticed….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Legs|Ugly