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Archive for the Christina Aguilera Category

2024

14

Feb

Christina Aguilera in Red Light Giving Boners of the Day

The new highlight of my pathetic and boring day is revisiting X-Tina…Let’s get Dirty….

I don’t actually care about Aguilera, I’m just happy to see that she’s less fat than she was in her 30s, because her being fat was a pretty sad turn of events when she was so small in her 20s….

It’s nothing against Aguilera, but celebrities are fucking shit and I don’t care about any of them….but since it’s a celebrity site and I have to post celebrity bullshit…my new favorite celeb is a skinny, older, sluttier, X-Tina….passed her sexual prime but willing to give the sexual content for the likes and follows and views because that’s how you get paid..

She’s less desperate since she’s Aguilera, so it’s like classic celebrity from the early 2000s doing her rounds before she dies..and I’m fine staring….

So here’s Aguilera giving boners….

Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2024

05

Jan

X-Tina Aguilera’s Dropped 40 Pounds and Still has Big Tits of the Day

It’s safe to say that X-Tina Aguilera, like all the other 40 year old fat celebs, is rocking the diabetes medication harder than they probably should, because clearly no one likes being fat, even those fat empowerment people pushing for diversity in models because they are fat and that’s how they get paid, wish deep down inside that they weren’t over-eaters….

I will never believe a fat person who says they are happy being fat, because as a fat fuck, there’s literally no benefits from being fat, from your penis getting absorbed by the fat, giving you a very female looking penis thanks to your gunt….to struggling to get up stairs, to being uncomfortable in clothes, to being uncomfortable in human sized chairs….it’s hell.

So it’s nice seeing that X-Tina took her new Vegas residency seriously enough to do basically nothing to actually lose weight, but take some pharmaceuticals, but it looks better than if she was still fat and that’s important….especially to me……because I still have a bet that I will fuck her in my lifetime.

I have written about this before, since it’s my only X-Tina story, but back in the 2000s, I was team Aguilera cuz she was getting DIRTY and her fake tits on her skinny frame was hotter than Britney’s thick neck.

I hated the way she sang, but I hated all pop music, so at least she did sing….

Anyway, it was pre-social media, pre-desperate celebs that are accessible people, back when there was a very aggressive barrier of entry between a man and a celebrity vagina.

So being the confident man I am, one who knows that I can end up ANYWHERE I really want to end up, because this shit’s a fucking videogame….I made a bet with a friend, who is probably dead by now, that in my lifetime, I will have sex with Christina Aguilera…

Neither of us are dead and she’s been fat for a long time so I haven’t even tried yet, but this 24 year old bet is still active in my mind and I’ll manifest that shit if she maintains this look for the next year, so WATCH OUT AGUILERA…looking like a hot 40 year old may lead to the worst sex of your life….probably smarter for her to get fat again than to have to resist my good looks and charm when I decide to turn it on to fulfill said bet.

Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2023

17

Oct

Christina Aguilera Has the Big Tits of the Day

I always fancied myself more of a Christina Aguilera fan than a Britney fan, which isn’t really being a fan since I hated all their music, especially the aggressive howling that Aguilera did, but strictly in a “who looked like a better fuck with the better fake tits”….

Aguilera, the tiny fake blonde chick with the bolt ons was just a level of trashy and sleazy that spoke to me, while Britney’s whole aesthetic was pretty fucking bulky….that was until Aguilera herself got bulky and spent the last 15 years looking like a fucking pig….a big fat ate her feeling pig…

It’s safe to say that she either ran out of money or realized how easy it is to make money as an Aguilera, so she’s got herself on what I assume is Ozempic, or some other weightloss miracle that slimmed her body down but kept her fake tits.

She’s now got a Vegas residency where she’s getting paid, she’s likely got a new album and these are some Behind the Scenes of the new video she’s dropping, ina CHECK OUT THEM TITS….

At 42, she’s finally got back to where she was at around 25 when I wanted to fuck her, not run from her because I feared her sitting next to me on the bus, which wouldn’t happen because she’s rich and doesn’t take the bus, but you know what I mean, fat girls are vile and not hot, so a skinnier Aguilera is a better Aguilera even though she’s old now…but clearly old is better less fat.

Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2022

04

Oct

X-Tina’s Titties are Big of the Day

I have a terrible memory, which is either because I block out my past due to trauma, alocholism, bad died, early dementia, or a constant thinking ahead because I have trained my brain to do these posts that no one reads every day!

So when I was thinking about what celebs I thought were hot or wanting to fuck in the 80s-90s and 2000s, I couldn’t really come up with any, because I did go to movies, I did listen to music, but I never bothered getting sucked into the whole lifestyle around it!

Meaning, I didn’t care who the actors were, if they were naked and I happened to have the rental, I’d jerk off to it and leave it at that, so I was never a fan, which is why I thought this site would be funny, a celeb site by a non-fan!

I remember making a bet with someone during X-Tina’s DIRTY era, where she was a tiny thing with bolt ons who looked like a gutter whore who would eat your ass, a big deal at the time because ass eating didn’t become standard practice yet, and that bet was that I would fuck her before either of us died, so I guess the challenge is still technically on 20 years later!

I was hoping she’d be more of a falling off, broke, destitute, turning tricks by now, you know so that I could get her sex at a discount, but instead, it seems she’s been paid well enough to keep her fed…..very well fed.

I won’t throw the towel in yet, but I don’t think her obesity will be the insecure kind, she’s likely still got a huge ego, but she’s also got huge tits, as fat girls do, so it’s worth putting the effort into this seduction, I mean, I have a bet to win, I just don’t remember who I made it with and obviously, I didn’t actually think I’d ever fuck her, but GAME ON, the key to life is setting goals and working towards them, that’s what gives us purpose!

Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2021

17

Sep

Christina Aguilera Panties of the Day

I don’t know if this is actually X-Tina getting DIRTY like it was 20 years ago…or if this is some wax figure of her, since her legs and stomach look a little too VAMPIRE GOTH white and not quite like actual skin…maybe it’s a shapewear leotard she’s trying to troll us with by sticking a bejewel where her belly button is…I DO NOT KNOW…but if those panties are as see through as they look, I’d expect to see more LABIA than NO LABIA….and who really cares…

She was my favorite of the popstars at least when she was on mute, I fucking hated her songs and that screeching kind of singing, but I did think she was hot…

It was a different era, where hot wasn’t really every girl in the world trying to be hot, trying to monetize, like it is now. I mean girls were pretty conservative back then, so seeing a racy pop star with her fake tits out on her tiny frame was always welcomed…keep in mind people used to jack off to music videos on MTV…I mean we were basically Amish virgins before a barn raising…

Anyway, I don’t know what the 40 year old is flashing us for, but WELCOME back from that sabbatical you jezebel you…

I am looking for more dignified words for whore, or slut, you know to class this place up a bit, since this smut is being produced by people worth 1000s of millions of dollars…they deserve better adjectives….like HUSSY, TROLLOP, VAMP…or we can stick with slut…I mean we can’t reinvent my 5th grade writing skills, old dog, new tricks…something X-Tina probably relates to.

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Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2021

16

Apr

Christina Aguilera Cleavage of the Day

I don’t why Christina Aguilera basically checked out for what must have been a decade…but I’m glad she’s making a comeback…

As much as I like Britney Spears now that she’s a prisoner of the system who has totally lost her damn mind, at the time of their rivalry I was also for X-Tina…she seemed tiny with big bolt-ons and she got DIRTY…when rebranding herself as X-TINA…it was a different era where girls weren’t selling pics of their assholes and sexting with strangers…when a hot music video was enough to jack off to…

I remember making a bet with a friend that I could fuck X-Tina Aguilera if I really tried, you know, I’m charming and capable…but she didn’t give me that reason to try…because she dropped off and disappeared and got fat…

But she’s still that trashy, still got the big tits out, and she’s all lubed up and ready to Jello Wrestle…at 40…game time.

Christina Aguilera Cleavage


Christina Aguilera Cleavage

Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2021

10

Feb

Christina Aguilera Hot Tub Party of the Day

Christina Aguilera Hot Tub

So the Genie in the bottle is the Big Girl in the Hot Tub…and I like it…

Christina Aguilera is the 40 year old popstar from the past who I guess has been reprogrammed and is ready for a comeback because make that money when you can….especially when you’re not as old as J.Lo…

I know all these bitches like to fake being hot, stretching it out as long as they can, but remember their vaginas are still those of old ladies…so all the lies are just lies…the vagina…like the rings of a stump tell the true age…and you can’t hide that…

But you can soak it in a fucking hot tub…where I guess she is hiding her old lady vagina to focus on what is important…her fat tits that are still likely her original bolt ons…it’s just her body caught up to the bolt ons and gave her the tits her skinny body could never support….because girl is thick….her pregnancies led to eating…but at least there’s the tits…

For a reference, I always thought X-Tina was the hottest of the popstars of her time, so I’m into the old fat version of her and encourage her to keep up the bathing suit titty pics…you know do it for Britney now that Britney only does beheading style videos from the prison camp…

Christina Aguilera Hot Tub

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Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2020

24

Aug

Christina Aguilera Gets Wet of the Day

Christina Aguilera Wet

Christina Aguilera is celebrating 21 years since her debut album this week and she’s doing it by showing off just how fat you can get in 21 years.

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Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2020

13

Aug

Christina Aguilera Titty Top of the Day

Christina Aguilera suprisingly only has 6.9 million followers on social media, which is crazy because some of these no name TikTok girls have 45 million followers. I’d google a list of the most followed accounts on instagram, just to show you how low 6.9 million followers is on the list of irrelevant internet people, who are clearly VERY relevant on the internet, because someone like Christina Aguilera who to me is up there with Madonna or Britney level of fame is fucking sucking..

It just goes to show you that the internet doesn’t really care about what you do off the internet, it’s all about what you do on the internet…and Aguilera, who I guess is moving in on Britney’s turf now that Britney’s instagram is fucking weird as shit and is likely in captivity somewhere, has clearly realized if she wants to play in the current era, she’s gotta start posting her massive tits, sure they are massive cuz she’s a fat 40 year old mom who was abused as a child, but they are still big tits and that’s enough to win the internet.

Not to mention, X-Tina, hasn’t really done much in the last 10 years that I can remember, I mean she probably still makes fucking bank, but she could easily drop a track on TikTok a month with some choreographed dance and make a shit ton more because she’s X-Tina, clearly lazy, based on her gut…but I guess starting to make moves..

She has the money, she has the team, she has access to the best producers, she’s X-Tina but is too lazy to drop a track a month…and is only now starting to show off her tits on instagram to get where she needs to go…

I’m a fan of X-Tina….I mean her singing annoys me…but she was the slutty bootleg Britney and I always side with the underdog so I’m a forever supporter…but bitch needs to step it up and stomp the fucking yard already, it’s SOOOOO easy to “break” the internet when you’re Christina Aguilera…so start fucking trying harder bitch.

Posted in:Christina Aguilera

2020

10

Aug

Christina Aguilera Wet T Shirt Contest of the Day

Christina Aguilera White Dress Pool

Christina Aguilera, unlike Britney Spears, is finally figuring out this social media thing at 40 years old, because she’s from an era where celebrities were so coddled that they didn’t need to do this bitch work, that was for the assistants and interns and I guess it probably still is, but she knows enough to participate in the capturing of the photo.

I was thought Aguilera was hotter than Britney Spears because I was more into trashy and slutty girls from broken homes, but I guess I didn’t know that Britney would end up allowing losers to knock her up and set them up for life, a pretty redeemable quality, before being held captive by her own family to produce hits, perform old hits and all that…while Aguilera went onto have a kid with some ugly as fuck dude, and control her own existence and money..

In this post from her pool, you will see the larger than she used to be, set of tits nippleless despite being in a white dress….confusing me, but fat chicks in the pool floating with their fake tits compensates for the lack of nips, I mean she does have to keep things semi PG, she’s 40 fucking years old after all and bringing out the tits now, like some kind of 20 year old, would be out of context…I guess.

She’s apparently promoting the new Cardi B song “WAP” because she’s probably paid to help push it, it’s a weird industry and after finding out Cardi B is managed by Kris Jenner, you sort of have to accept that this is all manipulating your minds…

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Posted in:Christina Aguilera