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Archive for the Jennifer Aniston Category

2014

16

Dec

Jennifer Aniston in Allure of the Day

I don’t think Jennifer Aniston is that hot…I mean not now at 100 fucking years old, and not when she was on Friends…

I think people were only responsive because she had fat tits and hard nipples while on a hit show, when hit shows mattered…

I figure if she’s not good enough for Brad Pitt, she’s not good enough for me, throw her out like last week’s kitchen garbage, shitty sitcom star…

But I’ll still look at her dried up, menopausal, not good enough for anyone to marry….tits…in Allure’s January issue…

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston

2014

11

Nov

Jennifer Aniston for Harper’s Bazaar December of the Day

I guess when you get old and your sex appeal dies with your fertility – you try to do creative things when it comes to photoshoots to distract people from the botox her millions of dollars buys herself…

Now I’m not a Jennifer Aniston hater, I just think she’s old, had a TV hit and should leave some room for the younger and fresher girls.

You know, do like she did in her marriage to Brad Pitt and take the sidelines for hotter pussy.

It just makes sense…unlike her posing with balls…which is kinda like the idea of her having sex appeal..

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston

2014

09

Sep

Jennifer Aniston in a See Through Dress of the Day

Jennifer Aniston is probably too old to not be wearing bras in see through tops if the camera flash hits the tit from the right angle, but I guess when these women don’t have kids and haven’t quite hit menopause, but are already starting to miss their periods periodically as they are slowly drying up, they know that it’s the window of opportunity, right before it’s absolutely too late…to give the world what they wanted to see 20 fucking yers ago…

Her nipples on tits that are hardly as good as they were on Friends, in an era when she was too prude to show her tits, even though we all know getting famous meant showing her tits often to all kinds of people, it’s part of the program.

But good enough to notice, because I guess it’s never too late to not wear a bra and show your nipples, even if it seems like you’re pretty much expired…that’s some silver lining that comes with the fact that people like tits in all stages of life because they are tits.

Here she is a bit of tank thanks to the depletion of estrogen…

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2014

08

Apr

Jennifer Aniston Monster of the Day

Jennifer Aniston always looks like this to me. Everyone, and by everyone I mean a handful of people with nothing better to discuss than Jennifer Aniston’s transformative role in some new movie, despite being a horrible actor to begin with, but hollywood spews nonsense and hollywood fans buy into it…perpetuating this horrible horrible world…

But for the last 5 years, despite her solid tits and hard nipples, this is all I saw when I saw Aniston playing the love interest or sex symbol in movies…Some old, saggy faced, overrated actress, who should be replaced with someone who isn’t 100 years old…because as fun as old ladies trying to be young girls since they can’t get pregnant cuz they removed their uterus for their career, I see similar women all the time, because I guess it’s a trend for moms to compete with their teen daughters for who has a nicer ass, it always has a nice level of pathetic, but not as much pathetic as I really want, because she’s probably worth 100 million dollars thanks to doing this shit and I guess that means the jokes on us…I mean look at this face…

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Posted in:Jennifer Aniston

2014

12

Mar

Jennifer Aniston Face of the Day

Remember when Jennifer Anistion was considered this hot thing all because she was on TV and had hard nipples? Or more importantly remember when Jennifer Aniston played a stripper a year ago in a movie like she wasn’t 100 fucking years old…

Well here’s Jennifer Aniston…now…not looking’ her best…

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Posted in:Jennifer Aniston

2013

31

Dec

More Jennifer Aniston Bikini Pics of the Day


If life wasn’t bad enough…knowing that we are heading into another miserable year…where we will be another year older…another year of more debt, failure and disappointment, where all our aspirations and hopes and positive expectations for ourselves will be fall and leave us exactly in the same place this time next year…Jennifer Aniston decided to get into a bikini and show everyone her body that if this was 1995…even 2005…it’d be hot and fun and exciting even…but bitch, we’re so bombarded with babes, even nobodies on our Facebook feed, that look better than this, it just pisses me off knowing these tits made her 100,000,000 dollars or more…what a fucking scam…

This would be much better if Jennifer Aniston chose a ski vacation instead of this.

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2013

30

Dec

Jennifer Aniston is a Bikini Monster of the Day


I saw Meet the Millers where Jennifer Aniston played a stripper monster who had no business stripping thanks to being 100 fucking years old…but it was a movie and I’ve been to strip clubs and know the broken down women in their 40s who still strip and hate it…so I could let it slide as a slice of reality in an otherwise pile of shit…the sadness in her face as she tried to be sexy knowing she isn’t sexy…

But here she is being a bikini monster far too old, and possibly pregnant, even if she’s likely too old to be pregnant…and the whole thing is scary to me…like a horrible nightmare that I may be taking bit too seriously, because with all inappropriate or misappropriation of bikinis, I can always turn the other way and look elsewhere, but really the fuck would I do that, I am totally into train wrecks…in the form of women who think they still got it.

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Posted in:Jennifer Aniston

2013

05

Sep

Jennifer Aniston’s Stripper Scenes from We’re the Millers of the Day

I don’t mind watching Jennifer Aniston trying to strip, because she’s horrible at this stripper shit, and since she’s won at life, it’s nice to see her fail at such a major scale…I’m talking on the big screen for everyone to ridicule, even though I know people are idiots and probably love the shit, even though she’s pushing 60 years old, and is clearly too old for this shit…not that you can ever be too old for stripping, some of my favorite strippers, the real desperate kind, are in their 50s…because they don’t have to take nights off cuz of that pesty period….like Jennifer Aniston…and they don’t even have a body nearly as good as Aniston, who spends hours a day on this shit, because the second she loses it, she won’t matter anymore….

Either way, based on her moves, she’s probably a really shitty fuck…but Brad Pitt could have told you that…and that was before menopause…

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston

2013

21

Aug

Jennifer Aniston’s Paparazzi Bikini Product Placement Pics of the Day

Some people get excited when they see Jennifer Aniston in her bikini pics and by some people I mean her corporate sponsors who I know pay her a few million dollars a year to promote their “Smart Water Brand”…because why else would she always be seen drinking the shit…it’s straight up product placement…

The simple law of paparazzi is that every picture you see is staged.

If Jennifer Aniston doesn’t want to be seen in a bikini in pictures when in a bikini, she isn’t…

My theory is that in her contract it states “This water must be in at least 10 different paparazzi pics a year” and she’s up to 8 and trying to pull it all together…to get paid, because celebs love their fucking money.

I mean the fact that the water is even in the shots is just proof to how full of shit she is, and really who cares about her water, or her hard nipples in her bikini, when the real highlight is how old as fuck she looks when she gets wet…like a real fucking Lochness Monster pissing in the pool cuz she’s got no bladder control thanks to menopause…and all the anal she had trying to not get pregnant to focus on her career. Good Times.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston