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Archive for the Jenny McCarthy Category

2009

14

Jan

Jenny McCarthy Whoring Herself of the Day

Jenny McCarthy believes that beauty should be recession proof, so she took on a job supporting the cause like it was some sort of political protest and not a fucking very well paid gig for her to spokesperson this shit and hopefully get people who are losing their houses, losing their savings, starving to death to pull out the 5 dollars Suave products cost, because I guess when you’re forced into prostitution, it’s better to have soft skin for random strange men to cum on, unless of course you’re Jenny McCarthy, in which you can just prostitute yourself by attaching yourself to commercial campaigns, because you already whored out your fake tits and body to Playboy decades of go and it was the John that kept on giving, wasn’t it. You fucking cunt.

Oh, and Suave, you’re a fucking cunt too. You have no sympathy to the current state of America you just want people’s money…milk them for all they got by thinking they actually need your fucking product, when we all know that your shit doesn’t do shit, it’s just a scam. You make girls feel insecure and come in as the fucking solution to all their problems, well guess what, my wife uses Suave and she’s fucking ugly, and no matter how much of your fucking shit she slaps on her greasy fucking body, she’s still fucking ugly, so why don’t you make your fucking product actually work and accept the fact that some people are lost causes, instead of milking the lost causes who know they are lost causes with your snake oil, especially in these hard fucking times. Fuck you.

Posted in:Jenny McCarthy|Whore

2009

06

Jan

Jenny McCarthy’s Hot Body in a Bikini with her Brother of the Day

I always wanted to punch Jenny McCarthy in the face, which may not be saying much since I want to punch most women in the face, I think it’s one of those wanting to do what you’re not allowed to do, you know the same reason your 15 year old daughter is rippin’ lines and sucking two dicks at a time while skipping school, only a lot more angry. The reason I wanted to punch her in the face wasn’t just because she had fake tits and a pussy, but because she was fucking annoying. I’d see her yelling aggressively at me on TV back in the 90s used to piss me off in a big way and I’d want to shove that big horse head in the motherfucking trough and hold her under the water until I felt her stop resisting, knowing that enough oxygen was deprived from her brain to leave her in the corner playing with rocks and drooling, calm and not bouncing off the walls screaming at me, like her autistic son, but her body is pretty fucking spectacular considering all she’s been through and how old she is, so seeing her in some bikini pictures works for me since her screechy annoying yelps can’t be heard, but the real thing that makes these pictures hot is that this couple look like fraternal twins and everyone loves seeing or thinking about twins fucking, it’s next masturbation we can envy since we’ve exhausted every masturbation method possible to keep things fresh and don’t have a twin to feel like we’re fucking ourselves.

Here are those pics…

Posted in:Body|Hot|Jenny McCarthy|Tight

2008

13

Aug

Jenny McCarthy Does Autism in a Bikini of the Day

I was walking down the street yesterday and had a little altercation with an Autistic kid without realizing it. I was standing on the street corner pretending to be a hooker, as I like to do sometimes, because my theory is that we all need a little glamor in our lives sometimes, and some mother was pushing her baby along in a stroller. I looked at the kid, who was sucking its thumb and lazily getting toted around by its mom and I realized the girl was 12 years old. I turned to a girl next to me and asked if she sucked her thumb like that when she was 12 and if her mom still dressed her up and played baby with her because she was the kind of mom who tried so hard to get pregnant, that when she did, she never wanted to let her go by growing u and still breast fed her at 12 and never potty trained her so that she could always change her little babies diaper, even after her little baby had her period and pubes, because the mom always wanted to be part of the girls life. The girl next to me was giggling then pointed out that the mom had a t-shirt that read “Mother’s of Austism 2008″, and I realized that I was an asshole.

Speaking of Autism, here are some pictures of Mother of an Autistic kid and her brother who she turned into her lover, and she’s in a bikini. Now, I don’t know about you, but I wanted to fuck the annoying, loud, obnoxious smile off this bitch’s face in the 90s, so it is only natural for me to document her bikini body whenever I can and the truth is, retarded baby from a broken down uterus or not, I still want to fuck the obnoxious smile off her face and bring the tears, pain and depression like I normally bring every time a girl gets with me.


Related Posts

Jennifer McCarthy and Jim Carey on the Beach
Jenny McCarthy’s Hot Mom Body in a Bikini
Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carey Make Some Gender Bending Jokes

Posted in:Autism|Bikini|Jenny McCarthy

2008

07

Jul

Jim Carey Makes a Joke With Jenny McCarthy’s Bathing Suit of the Day

Jenny McCarthy and her long lost Canadian relative, who I assume she doesn’t know is her relative and decided that the connection she felt the first time she met him was love at first sight, when in reality it was just on some genetic level. It’s like when you met a cousin from another country for the first time and you just hit it off immediately because you have the same grandparents, only in this case you give them your genitals, instead of a gift certificate to Starbucks for Christmas. Leaving the rest of the world looking in amazement and wondering if you’re related or if it is just a coincidence that you look like you’re twins while making out with each other in public. I guess we’ll all just have to wait for the flipper baby to know the truth and I am not talking about that Autistic shit McCarthy is up on already, that baby’s from a previous marriage.

I never found Jim Carey funny, I actually kinda hated him up until recently. He’s just this clown of a person who tries too hard to get a laugh and looks like an asshole while doing it. He reminds me of some cocksucker in my class who would never shut the fuck up in his antics and annoyed everyone until he got beat up enough that his spirits and jokes just stopped, leaving him down and out and reclusive in a dark corner, going from the annoying life of the classroom to the weird kid in the corner no one notcies, that is until one day he decides to take out his rage on the world and stages a school shooting.

But I have to admit, this stunt where he decided to put on Jenny McCarthy’s bathing suit to fuck with the paparazzi/public and get a laugh was pretty clever and reminds me a lot of this closet case who would always suggest we do the gayest things because it would be funny and for the sake of comedy. When he’d run around in ladies clothing, make-up and show a serious interest in Brad Pitt, we could pass shit off as a joke, but it got out of hand when he told me that we would really mess with our girlfriends at the time if they walked in on us sucking each other off. I didn’t really get the joke but he came back at me aggressively, because he thought I was ruining his joke and said that it would only really be funny if we timed it perfectly and the second they walked into the room expecting us to be playing videogames, I’d be cumming all over his face instead. It’d be a real fuckin’ knee slapper.

Sure, I was complimented that he thought I was worthy to take part in his joke, but I didn’t see much funny about letting him suck me off, it was just a little gay….

Either way, Jenny McCarthy’s body looks tight.

Posted in:Bikini|funny|Jenny McCarthy|Jim Carey

2008

20

May

Jenny McCarthy is a Hot Man of the Day

Jenny McCarthy has never been hot in my world, but then again, my world is a scary place and girls who were in Playboy don’t exist in it, but when I look at her now, I feel like she’d fit in nicely amongst the trannies I roll by and want to befriend because I am fascinated in their big hair, bad make-up, fake tits and penis, not in a sexual way, I am not creepy like that, despite knowing that tranny porn is watched mostly by straight dudes who think it’s less gay to watch a chick with a dick bang a chick than watch a dude bang a chick, because at least the dick’s got a hot set of fake tits, but I find it a little too unnatural to be down with. I do know that someone who has done that to themselves is probably a lot of fun to hang with because they obviously don’t give a fuck about what other people think about them.

The point of all that was to say that Jenny McCarthy may have big tits, she may live a life as a girl but until I see a spread out pussy, I am calling dude on this shit. Her freaky face is just too much like one of my homeboys than one that comes stock with a vagina.

Posted in:Hot|Jenny McCarthy|Man|Tits

2007

24

Aug

I am – Jenny McCarthy Bikini Pics of the Day

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No one seems to care that Jenny McCarthy is dating her long lost brother, I guess they think it is magical that 2 retarded faces came together like puzzle pieces from across the country and met in hollywood to be together. Their parents would be so proud.

I remember the first few time I watched porn in the early 80s, they always had an incest theme, which is kinda weird, but I guess was a fantasy of the era. I am talking more than one movie that I saw was about a father fucking his daughter or a sister fucking her brother, and that’s the shit people were getting off to. I didn’t think it actually happened, it was just so naughty that they got off to the concept and not to their siblings…if you know what I mean…

Then I met Roy, this dude who lived in the suburbs who was about 14 and dude came into school one day bragging about how he got laid. This went on for about 3 months before we called him out on who he was banging and all he would say was this older chick. We ended up finding out that his fat sister was jealous of all her friends who were getting cock so she started banging him, she was probably 18 or 19 at the time and we were all disgusted because she was his sister but that was before realizing how hot the shit was except for her being fat…

Either way, here are pics of Jenny McCarthy in a bikini with her rockin’ tight body for a 40 year old…


Related Posts:

Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carey on the Beach
Shitty Jenny McCarthy Upskirt of the Day
Jenny McCarthy Hangs With Carmen Electra

Posted in:Bikini|Cameltoe|Jenny McCarthy|Tits|Unsorted

2007

06

Jul

I am – Shitty Jenny McCarthy Upskirt of the Day

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I don’t think it’s considered an upskirt when the bitch in question is wearing some kind of bikini bottoms under her stupid dress but I will post it anyway because having no standards means it’s good enough for me.

That attitude translates nicely into my everyday life. I run a website that no one reads, before doing that I worked in jobs that lead to no where good. Before marrying my bottom of the barrel fat wife, I spent time with a variety of girls who were pretty fucking close to the bottom in both looks, addiction and where they were in life. The ones who were decent looking would cry while banging or run out screaming that they couldn’t believe what they just did and never accept that the did what they did. If I saw them on the street they’d cross over the other side.

So basically, these shitty Jenny McCarthy upskirt pics are just par for the course as they say in golf or wherever they use that stupid expression.

Posted in:Jenny McCarthy|Unsorted|Upskirt

2007

05

Jul

I am – Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carey on the Beach of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Hollywood “POWER” Couple, Jim Carey and Jenny McCarthy on the beach holding hands and they freak me the fuck out. These two look like they are brother and sister and I don’t normally have any skills at spotting similarities in people. I am also not very good at remembering names, secret handshakes or anything I do after about 1 drink because I am convinced my liver gave out on me a few years ago and shit goes straight to my head like I was an anorexic 15 year old girl at my first club.

Either way, incest freaks me out so much that I even had a dream, some may call it a fantasy about it the other day. In the dream, I walked in on a brother and sister having sex. I was into watching them fuck at first because I am a voyeur but when I realized that they were two people I knew who were related I freaked the fuck out. When I confronted them they said that their parents were brother and sister and that their grandparents were brother and sister and they were just doing what they knew. It was a weird fucking dream that I have no idea where it came from but it made me stop asking people I know if they would bang their sister. I know talking about dreams is as gay as it gets but when incest is involved I just can’t keep it to myself.

When I was younger I met this dude who used to brag to us about how he took his sister’s cherry. He was kind of an idiot farmer and thought we’d think he was cool but shit was just too twisted for me to grasp. He would tell us that he would sneak into her room at night and have his way with her and she was totally into it. He would brag about how accessible it was and how we were all a bunch of virgin idiots who didn’t know that the prize was so close to home. I never knew what happened to that dude, because he ended up getting caught and sent away so don’t let Jim Carey and Jenny McCarthy trick you into thinking this shit’s ok just because they are famous, how big her tits are or no matter how much you think that you’re the hottest thing out there and the only thing good enough for you is a bitch who looks like you….and remember no matter how long your hair is and no matter how many punk rock t-shirts you wear, you’re never hardcore when wearing schpants….

Posted in:Bikini|Implants|Incest|Jenny McCarthy|Jim Carey|Tits|Unsorted

2007

22

Jun

I am – Jenny McCarthy and Carmen Electra Hang Out Together of the Day

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I remember when these two bitches were considered the hottest thing Playboy and MTV ever did. It was the 90s and I am surprised I remember much from that era. I am happy to see that they are still friends because I am pretty sure back then they both hated the fuck out of each other. I am sure many plastic surgeons were bidding on their business by playing their tits up against each other, but in their old haggard age all that is behind them. Seeing these two sluts together reminds us all that there can be unity in this mean world, all you have to do is get older and realize that both your careers were created because of your fake tits and that anyone with 5,000 dollars could be you, so now that younger and hotter girls are taking over the seen, maybe it’s time to put your differences aside and compare what happens to fake tits as you age.

Posted in:Carmen Electra|Jenny McCarthy|Unsorted