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Archive for the Jessica Alba Category

2013

03

Jan

Jessica Alba’s in a Bikini and I Don’t Care of the Day

There’s something about a bitch having two kids that makes her invisible….even if her body is incredible…even if she’s someone who was considered the hottest Mexican to grace shitty movies…that she never got naked in….before doing typical hoodrat Mexican shit like getting herself knocked up to lock in a man….

The only good thing about her, is that she puts all other fat lazy mom’s to shame….cuz they pretend they can’t bounce back from their uterus being used to its full, unfortunate potential…

Yeah yeah…I get it…you wish this kind of thing was your wife or what your wife looked like…but what kind of person fantasizes about a wife…that’s way too lonely, sad, hopeless romantic…fantasies should be about hot pussy.

You see cuz there are a lot of under 30s out there, pre-baby making, who look better than this without starving themselves and trying so hard to have a second go at a career

I suggest we focus on that.

But on a positive Not AT LEAST SHE’S NOT Reese Witherspoon who Should Be Banned from Beaches ….Seriously….I know it’s not saying much but REESE WITHERSPOON ON THE BEACH SCARES ME …..

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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

05

Oct

Looking Down Jessica Alba’s Shirt of the Day


I keep holding onto the Jessica Alba dream because I am dated, out of the loop, I don’t leave my house and I don’t pay attention to the new Jessica Albas, the up and comers, the future….but after seeing her deflated mom tits in a bra, I figure it’s time to say goodbye to yesterday…

Alba’s an old lady, a mom, and even if she bends over in the rain wearing a black bra, all for the paparazzi to say “look at me, I’m still here and stylish, relevant and hot”…..I think it’s time to catalog her in the box in the basement of our minds as a teen dream we used to jerk off to and eagerly await hard nipple pics of….in a time that is long gone.

She’s done, or at least I’m done with her, but here’s one more run of Jessica Alba for the believers.


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

28

Sep

Jessica Alba Ass Scatcher of the Day


There is something that comes with being a mother that is amazing and beautiful….but there is so much more that comes with being a mother that is fucking disgusting….like the fact that these women spend so much time in doctor’s offices spread…or dealing with puking, shitting babies, even if the nanny does most of the work….coupled with hormones and exhaustion that lead to doing inappropriate shit like scratching your hermorhoided mom ass in public cuz your designer panties are irritating them….and for some reason I like this better than when bitches are young, conservative prude…giving up is awesome.


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

17

Aug

Jessica Alba in a Kids Pool in an Actual Pool in a Bikini of the Day


Jessica Alba has blocked me on twitter becasue she didn’t like my love letters I’d send her every hour on the hour….discussing the way I would treat her half mexican baby making ass like it was a dog I rescued from a backyard breeder….so I don’t know when this crafty bikini pic was taken all I know is that she’s showing off her cunt privileged life of being so rich and fortunate that she can swim in a pool within a pool, while the average american only gets to swim in sewer drainage ditches after a rainstorm….Oh how good it is to be hollywood…

I’m just posting it cuz she’s in a bikini and that’s the only way I like girls.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

16

Jul

Jessica Alba’s in a Bikini of the Day

I realize that the pic I posted isn’t of Jessica Alba in a bikini, but bitch is on a boat in a tube top, looking like a castaway on Survivor, crossed with some Mexican looking bitch, cuz she’s Mexican, on a fucking boat, rocking some thin shoulders, but during this trip….Jessica Alba was out in a bikini and I don’t have the rights to post the pics but I can link to them….and that is what I am going to do….and really it is probably better for me to keep 30 plus moms in bikinis off the site…cuz that’s the kind of shit, even when it is starring Jessica Alba, that shouldn’t fucking happen….there comees a time in every shredded thanks to pregnancy vagina that it needs to assume the role of middle aged mother…and that time has come for Alba…even if she’s hotter than most bitches, she’s still only a fragment of what she was….but I guess she’s still Jessica ALba…maybe I am just made cuz she blocked me on Facebook and Twitter for no reason….other than my hateful yet hilarious comments.


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

11

Jul

Jessica Alba in Her Bikini of the Day

I posted this pic of Jessica Alba in Italy in her bikini yesterday, or whenever it was that she put it up on Instagram, because I’m a fan of girls who are content produers….and who put the shit out before the paparazzi get to it….because the paparazzi are the devils and making the obsolete is a good thing…even the whole point of this post is to drive you to the paparazzi pics of Alba in her bikini …..

I like tacky girls marketing themselves in bikinis, it is the basis of most of my facebook masturbation sessions….you see cuz girls you know half naked is more fun than girls you don’t know getting fucked….and the real highlight of personal pics is finding out that bitch’s Mom’s got some Tits…..


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

10

Jul

Jessica Alba Twitter Bikini Pic of the Day


I woke up and turned on my instagram cuz I am only following hot girls who seem to post all kinds of bikini pics of themselves in a way that would make me wonder if they ever sleep or if they are in perpetual sun in a bikini, if I wasn’t too busy masturbating to their pics….and these Alba shots of her being a drunk in a bikini dropped that I decided to comment saying

I can see your boner….no wait that’s mine

To which she responded by blocking me.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

21

Jun

Jessica Alba’s Posing Hot for a Photoshoot of the Day

I don’t know what this photoshoot is for, but seeing Jessica Alba in a strapless dress, pretty much looking like she’s been knocked over at her high school prom, or even better, like she’s fallen over from being roofied at her high school prom, only for some a sexual predator, let’s say someone like me, you know for the sake of argument, to have clear path to her golden fleshy baby making cavern of all things good in the world…..because mom or not, Alba is still pretty fucking hot, and mom or not, I can still have fantasies of being the guy she never gave the time of day to, getting up inside her while she rests….it’s a totally normal fantasy….google it if you don’t believe me….


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

30

Apr

Jessica Alba Shopping with a Friend in a Little Dress of the Day

There are two hot things going on here that I like….

One is that happily married chicks are porno to me….especially when they are as hot as Jessica Alba….because there is no such thing as happily married…and the slight chance that she’d cheat on her husand inspires me…cuz dating married chicks is like dating the terminally ill…it is short lived and full of passion…so you never get locked in or really have to deal with the bullshit….cuz everyone knows where they stand and that it is all just about fucking before it is too late…

The other is the hot friend who isn’t Jessica Alba but who wants to be and every night asks herself why she wasn’t so lucky…resenting her everytime they hang but using it as a chance to out dress her and show off her body that didn’t have two kids so that all eyes are on her for once….It is the competitive nature of being a woman….a competitive nature that I know fucks with this girl’s self esteem hard…and makes her willing to fuck subpar men to feel good about herself…and that works for me….in fact that’s the only reason I’ve had sex.

Posted in:Jessica Alba