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Archive for the Jessica Alba Category

2011

09

Sep

Jessica Alba in a Shitty Mom See Through of the Day

Those Moms…..always starved for male attention after wrecking their bodies…I see how they look at me as they breast feed in the park…in disgust…but as far as I’m concerned looking at me in disgust is fucking foreplay and they actually like me watching….

Only in this case, Alba is taking her typical Alba stance, that can be found in all her shitty movies, and that’s by not being nude…and just being subtly erotica….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

01

Sep

Jessica Albas Post Baby Weight of the Day

Here are some Alba milk filled titties…all empty in the uterus…but still ravaged in the vagina…assuming she gets celebrity c-sections…cuz a little scar is easier to hide in a bikini than a meaty fucking cunt….as you know she’sll try to make a comeback and be that bitch on all fours showing vagina she once was…only now she’ll have to get naked to stay competitive….and interesting…which will be a nice change of pace for people like me who have always wanted to see her naked…I just have a thing for Mexicans who pretend they aren’t mexican, especially when they are hot and hollywood, even with their babyweight…. You know how it is.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

02

Aug

The Spy Kids Premiere Was Pretty Erotic of the Day

I just assumed that people who go to see movies like Spy Kids, especially grown men who don’t have kids are just real fucking perverts who you gotta look out for in the movie theater cuz they may be there to masturbate on your kids popcorn when you’re not looking…..you know kinda like me when I went to see that teenage hot chick movie about cheerleading or gynastics or some shit when wasted…only to be in a room full of 14 year olds who looked at me like I was creepy as fuck…cuz lets face it, I am….

But it turns out that there’s a whole diverse level of perversion at the Spy Kids premiere…there’s shit for everyone of all different fetishes to get off to…not just the pedos….

Here’s the unofficial list of the fetishes that were in attendence…

Alba pregnancy extreme pregnancy…for the Ready to Drop Porn Lovers

Charlotte Ross extreme legs….

Rachel Fox Some 15 Year Old….for the Sex Offenders

Verne Troyer for the Midget Fetishists

Electra Avellan for the Twin Fetishists even though she’s not with her twin…..

Alexa Vega for the Haggard looking 22 year old with Colombian father’s and model mothers who was an amateur Gymnast Fetishists…..yeah this one’s a real fucking stretch but I like to view it as a highly targeted fetish

Holly Robinson Peete for the Black Chick pushing 50 but who is from 1990′s ABC Sitcoms Fetishists….

And the Kool Aid guy for the real fucking weirdos who love fucking mascots and marketing icons for shitty brands….

This post is one of my dumbest…

Posted in:Alexa Vega|Charlotte Ross|Electra Avellan|Holly Roninson Peete|Jessica Alba|Kool AId Guy|Rachel Fox|Verne Troyer

2011

06

Jul

Jessica Alba Pregnant Tits Walking of the Day

Jessica Alba is another pregnant slut who pretends she’s not a slut by being all married and already a mom who I’d like to feel how tight her asshole gets as the baby crowns….you know one of those bathing in her placenta as her water breaks all over my chin….in a whole “pregnancy is beautiful as long as you’re not fucking it, because when you start fucking it, it gets messy, which sometimes isn’t all that bad, just ask Kim Kardashian how she feels about being a receptacle bodily fluids, it ain’t that bad”, nice belly button, ya heard….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

27

Jun

Jessica Abla’s Pregnant Mom Tits of the Day

I call these pics “Fat and Fertile, Mexican Roots Exposed” cuz every mexican woman I’ve ever met, even half mexican, has a uterus as fertile as a fucking rat living in the communal outhouse in the motherland…I’m talking kid after kid after kid….like there’s an endless supply of corn tortillas and avacados and pinatas to fuel the fucking thing and raise it to be the best illegal immigrant to jump the fence into the USA…..

Alba, despite denouncing her Mexicana roots, cuz she’s a cunt like that, too good to be Mexican, all Hollywood and above us Mexicans, but she can’t hide the fact that she’s already planning the next litter for when this one comes out, cuz she just can’t help her breeding self. It’s instinct..as well as a way to keep a man who tried to escape her….but instinct never the less.

I just like lookin at her tits for old times, uterus bloat or not…

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

16

May

Jessica Alba Pregnant Bikini Pics of the Day

I don’t know if I already posted these pictures, pregnant chicks, especially when half naked, are kinda like what black people think about white people, that they all look the same.

That’s not to say I wouldn’t try to have sex with her unprotected for confidence that I wouldn’t knock her up and have that lifetime commitment, but is to say that I’d probably hit it from the back, cuz that baby filled stomach with a buldging belly button is about as erotic as finding out a bitch has AIDS before sticking it in.

If that makes any sense…

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

13

May

More Jessica Alba Pregnant Bikini Pics of the Day

I figured we needed a little horror for Friday the 13th, and as far as I’m concerned having a creature growing inside you is as bad as it gets, for both career, sex appeal and most importantly vagina….

Clearly, I’m not one of those people who think pregnancy is hot. Ever.

To See the Rest of the Pics
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

12

May

Pregnant Jessica Alba in a Bikini of the Day

The only time I find a pregnant chick hot is when it is my wife and the I know for a fact the kid isn’t mine because then I have an excuse to leave the bitch with a smile on my fucking face.

I am not one of those idiots who thinks pregnancy is beautiful. I know the damage it does to a woman’s vagina, the headaches it causes, and if anything a living thing inside you, even if it is natural, seems so fucking unnatural….

So here are some pics of Alba throwing away her career a little more, and the positive side of this is that she’ll come back as a mature actress willing to get naked, the unfortunate side of that is that it’ll be too little too late, cuz this coincides with her not being at her prime.

If you know what I mean.

To See the Rest of the Pictures
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

19

Apr

Jessica Alba’s Pregnancy Pictures that Represent Bad Decision Making Skills of the Day

Here are some pictures of a pregnant Alba…What a fucking waste.

Maybe I’m just saying that cuz I’m a firm believer that pregnancy isn’t hot and that it kills bodies, careers and vaginas……

Maybe I’m just saying that cuz I don’t realize how naked she is gonna be getting in future roles to stay relevant and to get paid….

Maybe I’m just saying that cuz I firmly believe in abortion as a form of contraceptive…third trimester if escape route is needed….

Maybe I’m just saying that cuz these aren’t pics of her in a bikini….

Posted in:Jessica Alba