I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Kanye West Category

2009

02

Mar

Kanye West and His Lesbian of the Day

Kanye West took his new girlfriend out shopping, because buying her shit is the only reason she’s hanging out with him, it’s all part of the deal, along with fucking him up the ass like he was one of her lesbian lovers with her massive strap-on, but that’s just because it’s not as gay that way. I am having a debate with my stepdaughter right now who says she looks like a cheap hooker from the 90s from the neck down and like a dad from the neck up holding a life jacket in the event she has to jump off the fuckin’ boat and escape this asshole rappers wratch, while I just think she looks like a dyke about to go out and chop up some wood and plant an organic garden, because when you denounce dick, you’re only serious about it if you end all meat intake.

It really doesn’t matter, some rapper I met from NYC this weekend seems to think Jesus Walks is an epic song, that Kanye’s an amazing producer and that he just talks to much. I think Kanye’s an insecure little baby with sexual identity issues, trying to convince himself that all teh positive reinforcement his mom gave him was actually reality, even if he never really felt in in his heart.

Either way, Amber Rose is ugly, whether she’s a dyke or a hooker or just some groupie hipster bitch trying to get ahead and again, who really gives a shit.

Posted in:Kanye West|Lesbian

2009

24

Feb

Kanye’s Lesbian Hipster Girlfriend Dressed Like a Clown of the Day

If you’re wondering why Kanye’s dating some lesbian hipster, it’s because she’s got a haircut he can deal with as long as he fucks her from behind and she answers to the name, Jeff.

Here are some pictures of Amber Rose, Kanye’s Girlfriend, and her Ex-Girlfriend…Doing Some PG Dyking Out
GO

Posted in:Hipster|Kanye West|Lesbian

2009

18

Feb

Kanye West’s Vagina of the Day

So some Kanye West video just dropped and I figured I’d post it because everywhere that’s talking about it is saying shit like

Its not your computer this is how the video really is Kanye west ft kid cudi Welcome to heartbreak

or

Kanye makes a revolutionary move by making a video that will make people smack their TVs to see if they still work…

or

Mastermind, Kanye West Intentionally produces a video that will make you want to find ….

Shut the fuck up. Kanye’s not an innovator. He’s a biter. Not only is his music on some raping hipsters from Baltimore and Paris and making their unwanted mainstream baby because they are pro-life, but he’s also ripping off that Man in the Moon movie about Andy Kaufman where he wants to fuck his Christmas special up to get people out of their seat and smacking their TVs. I figure that was 30 years ago, so media, stop sucking his big clit and stroke his insecure fake ego, shit’s been done.

I am really only posting this video to go with the pictures of the monster Kanye’s been fucking, Either she’s got cancer or a dick, I don’t fucking know, but I do know that these aren’t doing a good job putting the rumors that he like an nice broad shouldered, bald headed man to rub up next to….if you know what I mean…if you don’t I’ll spell it out for you…he’s a fucking homo.

Posted in:Kanye West|Vagina

2009

30

Jan

Kanye Wests’ Word of Wisdom of the Day

I somehow managed to get on Kanye’s email list. I guess he sends shit out to various blogs to get some more exposure as part of his marketing strategy. He makes it look like he’s personalizing the shit, which makes us feel really important so we post it.

The truth is that I don’t really care either way. In fact, part of me hates everything about Kanye West and the other part of me really doesn’t give a fuck either way. I get he’s an ego, it’s an act, he’s insecure, his mother died for his sins and all that shit, but when I get emails like this, I can’t help but post them, because they are the kind of wisdom I feel we’re all lacking in our lives and by wisdom, I mean insanity. On a side note, I like how it’s all in caps lock, shit alienated me so much I only got through the first couple lines but liked where he writes thanks Paris because a genius loves company or some other ridiculous thing.

Subject: LAST DAY IN PARIS!

“THIS IS MY LAST DAY IN PARIS AND IT’S BEEN CRAZY. I’VE MET SO MANY DOPE PEOPLE. I FEEL SO INSPIRED BY THE TRIP… I’VE BEEN THINKING OF RAPS, BEATS, CLOTHES, VIDEOS ,STAGE DESIGNS AND PHILOSOPHIES … I ALWAYS FEEL MY BEST WORK IS MY NEXT WORK… I’VE MADE SOME GOOD CHOICES AND SOME MISTAKES… I’VE BEEN LOVED AND HATED…. I’VE BEEN HAILED AND RIDICULED… I’VE BEEN INVITED TO SHOWS AND AS USUAL ASKED NOT TO COME… I’VE BEEN ATTACKED FOR BEING ME… FOR BEING BRIGHT RED IN A GREY WORLD…. I AM NUCLEAR ENERGY… WHEN ENCAPSULATED IN AN IDEA OR BOX LIKE A STAGE OR SHOE DESIGN I CREATE MAGIC… WHEN LEFT FREE SOMETIMES I BURN THINGS… IT’S THE NATURE OF A TRUE ARTIST… I AM NOT PERFECT AND I WILL NEVER BE WHAT I WAS TAUGHT MY WHOLE LIFE AND THAT WAS TO BE “CHRIST LIKE”… I’M FINE WITH JUST BEING THE BEST ME! I ACCEPT AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR MY MISTAKES AND LEARN FROM THEM. I WILL NEVER ATTACK NEGATIVE PEOPLE AND THEIR ENERGY…I FORGIVE THEM FOR THEY DON’T THINK FOR THEMSELVES BUT MERELY BASE THEIR OPINIONS ON WHAT THEY WERE TAUGHT. LIFE IS A GAME! IF EVERYONE UNDERSTOOD WHAT I WAS DOING WHEN I WAS DOING IT THERE WOULD BE NO CHALLENGE THEREFORE NO GAME. IT IS THE CRACK IN THE WALL THAT ALLOWS LIGHT TO SHINE THROUGH… SOOO THANK YOU SENSATIONAL NEWS REPORTERS … THANK YOU GOSSIP SITES… THANK YOU BARBER SHOPS… THANK YOU TO ANYONE WHO THRIVES ON THE DOWNFALL OF OTHERS FOR I WILL NOT FALL!!! YOUR PESSIMISM IS MY POWER… YOUR PRESUMPTIONS LEAD TO MY REDEMPTIONS … I DON’T LIKE THE OBVIOUS… I LIKE THE TENSION… I LIVE FOR THE FIGHT… I AM A SOLDIER OF FREE THOUGHT IN A CLOSED MINDED WORLD AND I AM READY FOR WAR… I HAVE LOST EVERYTHING SO I AM FEARLESS … YOU OBVIOUSLY DON’T KNOW WHO YOU’RE UP AGAINST… I WILL SPARK A GENERATION OF THINKERS WHO WILL QUESTION TRADITIONAL THOUGHT UNTIL THEY FIND THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH. THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME SOMEONE TO PROVE WRONG AS I HAVE DONE FOR MY ENTIRE LIFE… YOU FEEL THE WORLD WILL NEVER CHANGE.. YOU FEEL MISERY IS THE ONLY COMPANY… AND I AM HERE TO PROVE YOU ALL WRONG… (I’LL GIVE THE SECRET TO MY DEMISE FOR ALL THAT WISH I WOULD JUST DROP DEAD…. ACCEPTANCE!!… IF YOU COULD FINISH MY SENTENCES THERE WOULD BE NO REASON TO START THEM. ) THANK YOU PARIS ONCE AGAIN FOR ALLOWING ME ACCESS TO THE GREATEST ARTISTS AND DESIGNERS THIS EARTH HAS TO OFFER… THANK YOU FOR THE INVITATION BECAUSE GENIUS LOVES COMPANY”

Let’s hope he keeps me on this crazy email list. It feels like group therapy with a self absorbed prick who preaches his crazy theories and over analyzed ideas and I find that fun. Next time I promise to read the whole thing.

Posted in:Kanye West|Words of Wisdom

2009

26

Jan

Kanye West is an Asshole of the Day

I hate Kanye West. You can tell dudes an insecure little pussy with no friends. He just secured a deal with Luis Vuitton to make some hip hop shoes for them, because that’s how these big corporations work, hire a celebrity to be the face to a new direction they are taking their shit.

Now he’s on some ego trip. Like he’s a fashion icon, because not only did his mom suck his dick and make him feel like a star when she was alive, but so did everyone else. He is the kind of guy in dire need of getting beat the fuck up and the only way we can do that is to not buy anything he does, or participate in his music.

That means, everytime it hits the radio, call your radio station and complain. That means standing outside your local record store staging hunger strikes and shit. This motherfucker is detrimental to the world and needs to be stopped.

In this video, he’s decided to joke around about changing his name to Martin Luis the King Jr and I find that offensive. Kanye hasn’t progressed society in anyway, he’s just a little 5 foor 6 cunt with small man syndrome and no mother.

Posted in:Asshole|Kanye West

2008

05

Dec

Kanye’s Eat Shit and Die Freestyle of the Day

A fan through a penny at Kanye, which it too bad, because they should have thrown a brick or something that permanently damages him so that he can stop his touring because this hipster poser cunt, who is ripping off France Electro acts annoys me. So Kanye decided to show the world how easy it is for him to pump out hits, by making up some freestyle on the spot called “Eat Shit and Die”. Telling the penny thrower that he should be ashamed of himself and should “Eat Shit and Die”. Watching Kanye, is like hanging out in the school yard, watching a little brat who’s mom coddles him being picked on, who finally decided to stand up for himself and take on the bullies, and I’m impressed, because when I’m backed in a corner and someone throws money at me, I usually just pick it up and run away, hoping they don’t come after me asking for it back, because I am a hurt bag and any amount people can afford really helps, even if it’s rudely thrown at me. There are no high roads too high where I come from, straight up bottom feeding is my survival skill. I figure if I can manage to get 1000 people to throw one penny at me, I’ll have enough to buy a 6 pack, I just need to find a way to offend or annoy people as much as Kanye does,

But I have pissed off someone enough to throw money my way once. He was some gangster drug dealer and I was at a bar and cut him in line. He was trying to impress a chick, to prove that he was some big shot and that people bow down to him, so he started pushing me while I was ordering my drink and to be a big shot about things. I told him I was waiting to pay, and that’s when he got right up in my face and threw 100 dollar bill on the counter. I was worried about being shanked, because he was mad and wanted me to know how tough he was, without realizing the waitress spotted it before he could get it back, and pocketed that shit before I had a chance to, but I think he really proved his point that I shouldnt cut him in line ever again because it may or may not end up in winning the fucking lottery. Asshole.

Posted in:Eat Shit and Die|Kanye West

2008

26

Nov

Kanye West Suicide Watch on Conan of the Day

I was at some chick who lives in the building’s apartment because I needed to borrow a cup of sugar, and by sugar I mean bitch just wanted to fuck me and I don’t have it in my to say no to positive attention and by wanting to fuck I mean I invited myself over to watch TV because I don’t have one.

I ended up watching Kanye on Conan and when I watch him I feel like I am experiencing some sort of mental breakdown, and since I was too busy staring at the chick who lives in my building’s braless titties, I didn’t really pay much attention to this insecure broken down motherfucker, but I did notice that near the end of the interview he announces he has to go to the bathroom like he’s got no fucking filter or care for anyone by himself in his self centered world, like a retarded kid who can’t think 30 seconds into the future, and who need handlers to make sure he doesn’t do things he’s not supposed to when in public, like this retard I used to work with, who was hired by some work program, so my boss could get cheap labor, and I could have a good laugh when showing him pictures of tits in playboy and convincing him that they were the girl we worked with’s tits, getting him all riled up and ending with him groping her, because dude liked what he saw and didn’t realize shit was inappropriate behavior because he could only work on impulse, it’s what being retarded’s all about.

Either way, Kanye doesn’t play along with any of Conan’s jokes, he wasn’t interesting to listen to, he wasn’t funny, and he wasn’t normal, he seemed medicated and totally affected by the fame, money, and death of his mother. Dude’s about to fucking crack and he reminded me of a 5 year old who just got molested only he takes himself a lot more seriously than a 5 year old, with self-proclaimed announcements that he’s a pop artist through music and shit, because everyone knows if you call yourself a pop artist, people will believe you’re one, but the real truth is that his art died the second he made his first album, now he’s just some mainstream, pop, Daft Punk rip off artist, milkin it for all he can while losing his fucking perspective and slowly diving into insanity and the day he takes his shit that he’s been taking so seriously to heart and ends up jumping off a fuckin’ building, or Kurt Cobaining himself.

He’s not pushing boundaries, he’s just a broken down motherfucker and I think it’s gotta do with God taking his momma away, but maybe it’s time for his friends to intervene, but I am pretty sure he doesn’t have any, he’s just got employees and people sucking up to him and that’s probably where the crazy started.

Here’s his performance.

Posted in:Kanye West|Suicide

2008

25

Nov

Kanye West With a New Freestyle Weirdness….of the Day

So Kanye’s on this new kick where he breaks into weird made up song when he’s in concert. This time he goes on some weird ramble about there being other fish in the sea and into some Pinocchio shit..last week in concert he went on some freestyle about being lonely at the top .

It’s like he uses the stage as a platform for his therapy where he runs some beat and sings songs that he throws together off the top of his head that are about as solid and make as much sense as when my wife gets singing in the shower, you know throwing random broken English words together trying to make some kind of song she thinks represent her feelings at the time, because she thinks she could have been famous if she was black, because fat white women get no respect, but fat Black women get careers like Beyonce, Queen Latifah, Alicia Keys, Star Jones, only she doesn’t realize she’s a talentless hack who should stick to what she’s good at, like eating more Oreos in one sitting than you thought was humanly possible.

Truth is, this dude is like a 5 year old kid who starts in on a made up song as she finger paints, but Kanye thinks he has the right to be heard, because he’s got this fake ego and thinks he is Elvis with some revolution creative artistry because he’s a broken down little white girl with mommy issues, who was coddled and told he was the best growing up and that has given him a whole lot of insecurities, all while trapped in a black man’s body, but people are confused and think that he’s some kind of genius, when in reality, he is just good at marketing his shit and ripping off other people making people think he’s really this talent and this chanting weirdness, like something out of a cult sermon, or a preschool Christmas Pageant makes me feel uncomfortable when seeing it coming out of his mouth, when people bought tickets to hear his Daft Punk/Justice cover song called “Stronger”.

Either way, here’s a 5 Year Old Singing a Made Up Song…Kanye Rippped Off Her Style….

Here’s another set of 5 Year Olds Singing a Made Up Song….Kanye Ripped Them Off Too….

Posted in:Freestyle|Kanye West

2008

14

Nov

Kanye West Goes on a Crazy Freestyle Rant of the Day

I can’t figure out if Kanye West is a genius, or just fucking crazy. The guy pulls the ego shit amazingly, he is the the center of his own world and doesn’t really give a fuck about anything that isn’t about him, so I heard his last tour didn’t have a DJ, because he wanted all the focus on him, and I heard that he was pretty much preaching his shit to the crowd and talking to a computer the entire show, instead of playing his hits, and that it fucking sucked…..

So when he was in London, he went on a 12 minute freestyle, that’s more like some chant, and not a rap, and it was like reading a page out of a really intense girl’s diary…..I didn’t listen to the whole thing, because shit was fucking boring….but he goes into the market being too bad to sell his house, and about being lonely at the top after getting the number one spot he wanted, about how his mom is looking down on him, how suicide is the only way out, or some other crazy shit but he won’t let them get the best of him because he lost his better half….This is like watching a seriously disturbed video you’d see before a kid goes and shoots up his school. His head’s not in the right fucking place and that’s why I am posting it….

I kinda like it better when people bottle their problems up inside them and don’t fuckin’ bore us with their shit. But if anything can be learned from this, talk about your dead mother as often as possible, because it’s the perfect sob story that gets people excited and cheering…and drop Obama’s name every chance you get because you’ll get people chanting along with you…..

So this is boring, but you have nothing better to do, so witness all the warning signs that Kanye will be found dead in a hotel room somewhere, because despite loving himself so much, he’s a weak momma’s boy who can’t survive alone….if his next album doesn’t sell at a level he wants it to…it will be the straw on the camels back, or whatever that Arab expression is….


UPDATE: I don’t follow the news, but it turns out that Kanye was Arrested Last Night for Fucking with the paparazzi….

Here’s the story
GO

Posted in:Crazy|Kanye West

2008

07

Nov

Kanye West’s Shitty New Animated Video of the Day

So my internet didn’t work when I woke up this morning after a night of drinking and I figured it was a message from God to take some time for myself because I just work way too hard, then I realized that I barely work, what I do is my way to waste my free time, I just happen to have a lot of it, so it seems like I am always online being productive, I am online all the time, but I am never productive, I just have nothin’ better to do. It also turns out that there is no God, my neighbor just didn’t pay for his internet I’ve been stealing, so I went over to give him shit about it, he made a few calls, and now I’m back.

In my time off, I decided to go on a walk, I came across a sign that was promoting some moving sale at someone’s house near by. It said there was designer clothes, jewelry, Luis Vuitton products and all this other bootleg shit, so I figured I’d take my cracked out self by to pick up some Luis Vuitton luggage on discount, so I could turn around and sell that shit for a profit, like I was Obama livin’ in the Ghetto, sellin’ crack, but when I got there all they had was a couple of picnic baskets, a pair of skis from the 80s and 2 bibles. It was a bust….

Just like this new Kanye West video that premiered earlier today….

Posted in:Animated|Kanye West|Video Premiere