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Archive for the Kimberly Stewart Category

2009

27

Nov

Kimberly Stewart’s Useless Ass in Jeans of the Day

Here are some pictures of Rod Stewart’s mistake who moved to Hollywood to live off her ridiculous trust fund like she was a celebrity of her own. Trying to do the whole Paris Hilton thing she was doing a decade ago, but for some reason shit just never worked out for her. She never got picked up, she never got work, she never got a fanbase, she was just some bitch going in an out of clubs and the whole thing left her just lookin’ old and washed up, wishing she had more of a relationship with her dad, other than just access to his money that he gives her to keep her the fuck away from his new life because he’s too busy masking his sexuality by spending all his free time with his fifth manly blonde model wife and his four younger, less fucked up kids who he actually has some confidence in since he’s learned where he went wrong in making this Kim Stewart and her ass in demin his trial run that fucked up along the way…..

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Ass|Denim|Kimberly Stewart

2009

25

Sep

Kimberly Stewart is Real Ugly of the Day

Hey Rich Girls….Kimmy Stewart proves that if your dad doesn’t give you much love or attention because he is too busy being a short rockstar marrying tall models pretending he’s not a fuckin’ fag, despite what his music would imply, then divoricing those tall models because they don’t have dicks and they give up on trying to convince him to fuck them for more than just the sake of knocking them up, cuz babies secure the lie since everyone knows that gay guys don’t have babies, forcing him to move on to the next tall model, leaving you without a father, but with a trust fund to do whatever the fuck you want with it, because he has so much money, he doesn’t care you burn thru, cuz he doesn’t really care about you as he never really got to know you since he has only really met you a handful of times, which may be a good thing for you, because after seeing the Mackenzie Philips incest lie, having a rockstar dad who likes you a little too much does just as much damage -leaving you self-medicating disaste with a serious drug addiction…. don’t fall into the trap, cuz by the time you turn 30, you’ll look like fucking shit.

Pics via INFphoto

Posted in:Devil|Kimberly Stewart

2009

21

Aug

Kimberly Stewart is Not Dead but She Is 30 of the Day

I think I may be psychic because I was just thinking about this whore the other day, remembering a time when she was embarrassing herself everywhere she went. I figured she was dead and no one reported it because she is insignifcant, but I guess I was wrong and the real issue is why the fuck I was thinking about Kimberly Stewart…..

Sure she was an easy thing to laugh at cuz her dad is Rod Stewart and he was off touring the world and fucking models when she was growing up, you know too busy to spend time with her, leaving her forced to build a relationship with him by playing his CDs to fall asleep at night and pasting her face in pictures she cut out of the tabloids to put on her wall, like some obsessed fan and not like a little girl wishing to be with her daddy, but he alway took the time to have his assistant male off the check to make sure she could distract her enough from his absence.

So her daddy issues, as funny as they are, are not that much different than the daddy issues so many other girls I’d rather look at have. So I prefered her bird faced twat fading into obscurity. I didn’t miss seeing her spending her daddy’s money like a waste of space…an old waste of space because she was out celebrating her 30th birthday yesterday and here are the boring pics….

Rhys Ifans was there….you probably know him from jerking off to the Harry Potter movies…I know him as the engaged to…thanks to the make a wish foundation or something…but at least she was wearing a see thru shirt….cuz slutty behavior may explain how she tricked a celebrity into hanging with her….it all starts with the vagina….

Posted in:30|Kimberly Stewart

2007

28

Sep

I am – Kimberly Stewart’s Pantyhose of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Kimmy Stewart lookin’ better than usual at some premiere in the UK two days ago. I feel like Kimmy Stewart’s the kind of girl that guys are always two days late for because she’s not that hot and when they hear that she’s two days late they plot some kind of scheme to punch her in the stomach while she’s sleeping, the “I was having a nightmare” induced miscarriage.

The thing that always surprised me about her is that she’s probably slated to inherit a truckload of money when her dad dies. I know he’s got his own army of blonde kids running around the globe, with his own army of blonde ex wives he needs to payout and I am sure Kimmy’s not the favorite one, but she’s more set than you’ll ever be, and that’s enough reason for me to fall in love, because looks aren’t everything.

I was in a bar last night, in a group of people trying to get my drink and some asshole farted, literally. Everyone around me were looking to see where the fucking smell was coming from, and as soon as they saw me, they were gave me the look like I’m fucking disgusting, because I was the fattest and rattiest dude and although I usually smell, I actually showered yesterday and it wasn’t me, I am convinced it was this tight bodied blonde chick in a short dress but since she was hot everyone assumed it wasn’t her even though logically, her asshole was pretty much hanging out of her dress and there was less travel time for the fart to get out there…I fucking hate talking about fart and making fart jokes but it’s a story and it proves my point…I just wanted to clarify that I hate fart jokes….and was just telling a story to prove a point….

And the point of the story is that I felt like Kimberly Stewart at a family dinner, so I guess what it comes down to is that looks do matter. Sorry Kimberly but at least we’re in it together now buy me things. Cuddles.


Related Posts:

Kimberly Stewart’s Cellulite Ass in a Bikini
Kimberly Stewarts Skirt Fights the Wind
Kimberly Stewart Getting Dressed at Coachella
Kimberly Stewart’s Got Hot Legs
Kimberly Stewart’s Sister is Hotter Than Her…So Are Most People…

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Legs|Pantyhose|Unsorted

2007

28

Sep

I am – Kimberly Stewart's Pantyhose of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Kimmy Stewart lookin’ better than usual at some premiere in the UK two days ago. I feel like Kimmy Stewart’s the kind of girl that guys are always two days late for because she’s not that hot and when they hear that she’s two days late they plot some kind of scheme to punch her in the stomach while she’s sleeping, the “I was having a nightmare” induced miscarriage.

The thing that always surprised me about her is that she’s probably slated to inherit a truckload of money when her dad dies. I know he’s got his own army of blonde kids running around the globe, with his own army of blonde ex wives he needs to payout and I am sure Kimmy’s not the favorite one, but she’s more set than you’ll ever be, and that’s enough reason for me to fall in love, because looks aren’t everything.

I was in a bar last night, in a group of people trying to get my drink and some asshole farted, literally. Everyone around me were looking to see where the fucking smell was coming from, and as soon as they saw me, they were gave me the look like I’m fucking disgusting, because I was the fattest and rattiest dude and although I usually smell, I actually showered yesterday and it wasn’t me, I am convinced it was this tight bodied blonde chick in a short dress but since she was hot everyone assumed it wasn’t her even though logically, her asshole was pretty much hanging out of her dress and there was less travel time for the fart to get out there…I fucking hate talking about fart and making fart jokes but it’s a story and it proves my point…I just wanted to clarify that I hate fart jokes….and was just telling a story to prove a point….

And the point of the story is that I felt like Kimberly Stewart at a family dinner, so I guess what it comes down to is that looks do matter. Sorry Kimberly but at least we’re in it together now buy me things. Cuddles.


Related Posts:

Kimberly Stewart’s Cellulite Ass in a Bikini
Kimberly Stewarts Skirt Fights the Wind
Kimberly Stewart Getting Dressed at Coachella
Kimberly Stewart’s Got Hot Legs
Kimberly Stewart’s Sister is Hotter Than Her…So Are Most People…

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Legs|Pantyhose|Unsorted

2007

20

Aug

I am – Kimberly Stewart Bikini Pictures of the Day

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The weekend is always pretty dull for me. I end up going out on Friday and getting carried away with the drinking so that on Saturday I can’t fucking function and end up passing out by midnight on the kitchen floor, and Sunday is always the day I have set to do shit like the dishes or the laundry or whatever around the house but it never fucking happens, I always get distracted or end up at my wife’s shitty tea party with disgusting bitches who can’t get dick, but trust me they are fucking trying and by the time I figure out a way to get the fuck out of that shit, I try to hit up the strippers to get a couple of lap dances to inspire me for the week of work, because new titties always make for new ideas but my wife had no money for me to steal and I was forced to stay in and smell her from the other room. I was considering posting all the new pictures that are came out over the weekend, but since it was the day of rest, I decided to sleep for 14 hours instead.

Here are some Kimmy Stewart pics in some booty short type bottoms riding up her ass….I always write about how this bitch looks like she’s been hit by a fuckin bus because her face is so fucking busted but she’s got a good enough body for me and I’d still watch her shower because I’d pretty much watch anyone shower, but that’s the kind of guy I am, I call it non-discriminating, and I should be an example to all you fucking bigots. Reality is bitch has cellulite an should be rocking a pair of those body contouring shorts that hide that shit, but if you’ve seen my wife, you would realize that a little out of shape skinny girl in boyshorts is a lot better than a morbidly obese fat girl in pretty much anything. So be a little more positive about things, asshole.


Related Posts:

Kimberly Stewart Bikini
Kimberly Stewart’s Sister
Kimberly Stewart’s Got Good Legs
Kimberly Stewart Dresses Like a Fag at Coachella
Kimberly Stewart’s SKirt Fights the Wind

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Kimberly Stewart|Unsorted

2007

18

Jul

I am – Kimberly Stewart's Skirt Fights the Wind of the Day

Kimberly Stewart

I used to hate Kimberly Stewart, but as I thought about her more I realized she’s not so bad. Yeah, she is just another Hollywood socialite, but she accepts that. I never see her going to “acting” classes, or here about her putting out her new album, or going to work with AIDS babies in Africa, or becoming a “designer” and starting some bullshit clothing line she plans to sell for way more then it’s worth, cause we all know she’s really not a designer.

Kimberly Stewart accepts that her father is a rich old bastard, and that she just gets to run around shopping and going to night clubs, and be a famous idiot while the rest of us work all day and hate our lives. I know she modeled for a bit, but I mean that doesn’t count because you just get to be pretty and sit there. She knows she’s pretty much useless, but doesn’t try to be something she’s not and in a round about way, that shows her confidence just to be herself and be comfortable with it. I respect that.

There’s a lot to be said for confidence. I was out of town with my ex-boyfriend not long ago, and was hanging out at this bar when this midget came up to me and started running all this game and trying to take me home. He was short obviously, but pretty cute. When it came down to it. The thing that amazed me out of all of this was this dude had more confidence and skill with ladies then almost any other guy I have met, and he was a fucking midget for god sakes.

He was so comfortable and accepting of the fact that he was what he was, that after talking to him for 5 minutes, I almost forgot my initial thought path of wanting to see him wrestle in a ring. If I hadn’t have been with boy friend that night, I prolly would have gone home with him. What can I say? I would have liked to fuck a midget.


Related Posts

I am – Kimberly Stewarts Hot Legs and Busted Face of the Day
GO

I am – Kimberly Stewart Had Good Legs of the Day
GO

I am – Kimberly Stewart’s Cleavage of the Day
GO

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Uncategorized|Unsorted|Upskirt

2007

18

Jul

I am – Kimberly Stewart’s Skirt Fights the Wind of the Day

Kimberly Stewart

I used to hate Kimberly Stewart, but as I thought about her more I realized she’s not so bad. Yeah, she is just another Hollywood socialite, but she accepts that. I never see her going to “acting” classes, or here about her putting out her new album, or going to work with AIDS babies in Africa, or becoming a “designer” and starting some bullshit clothing line she plans to sell for way more then it’s worth, cause we all know she’s really not a designer.

Kimberly Stewart accepts that her father is a rich old bastard, and that she just gets to run around shopping and going to night clubs, and be a famous idiot while the rest of us work all day and hate our lives. I know she modeled for a bit, but I mean that doesn’t count because you just get to be pretty and sit there. She knows she’s pretty much useless, but doesn’t try to be something she’s not and in a round about way, that shows her confidence just to be herself and be comfortable with it. I respect that.

There’s a lot to be said for confidence. I was out of town with my ex-boyfriend not long ago, and was hanging out at this bar when this midget came up to me and started running all this game and trying to take me home. He was short obviously, but pretty cute. When it came down to it. The thing that amazed me out of all of this was this dude had more confidence and skill with ladies then almost any other guy I have met, and he was a fucking midget for god sakes.

He was so comfortable and accepting of the fact that he was what he was, that after talking to him for 5 minutes, I almost forgot my initial thought path of wanting to see him wrestle in a ring. If I hadn’t have been with boy friend that night, I prolly would have gone home with him. What can I say? I would have liked to fuck a midget.


Related Posts

I am – Kimberly Stewarts Hot Legs and Busted Face of the Day
GO

I am – Kimberly Stewart Had Good Legs of the Day
GO

I am – Kimberly Stewart’s Cleavage of the Day
GO

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Uncategorized|Unsorted|Upskirt

2007

28

Jun

I am – Kimberly Stewart's Got Hot Legs and a Busted Face of the Day

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I was just given free credits on a webcam site so I logged in to talk dirty to girls doing dirty things to themselves. The first room I went into was a tall blond girl in her lingerie who looked pretty fucking amazing. Just as I was typing “Stick a dildo in your ass like the whore you are”, she started to blow her nose into a Kleenex. I would have been okay with it if bitch hadn’t been so graphic in trying to clear out whatever was clogging up her nose. She was shoving her finger in the thing diggin’ for clams in front of a pocket mirror. I made me want to throw up so I didn’t end up wasting my free credits on her and that means I never saw her real clam.

She didn’t care that dudes are trying to jerk off to her. She didn’t care that dude’s have no interest in seeing that shit. It was probably her passive aggressive way of saying she doesn’t give a fuck about us or our needs, she just wants our money and until she gets our money she’s just going to sit there waiting like we’re not there and even if that means scratching her ass, blowing her nose, popping her pimples or doing her fucking laundry and any other disgusting habits she’s got, she’s going to do them.

Kimmy Stewart is a lot like this webcam whore, she walks around with her face out in the public making us all sick to our stomachs distracting us from her hot legs. If she was to walk around with a mask on, or a hood over her face, or a Muslim costume while showing off her legs, you’d think she was a hot piece of ass you’d want to fuck, instead we don’t have the chance to enjoy a good thing or wait for bitch takes off the mask, hood or Muslim costume to have all the dreams of cumming inside her wash away. She just puts it all out there…

So if you’re an ugly girl with hot legs, ass or tits don’t feel afraid to cover up your problem spots, even if it’s your face. If you’re a webcam whore, try not to do disgusting things when guys are watching you. I am just trying to help you get ahead.

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Legs|Unsorted

2007

28

Jun

I am – Kimberly Stewart’s Got Hot Legs and a Busted Face of the Day

kimmy_stewart_legs.jpg

I was just given free credits on a webcam site so I logged in to talk dirty to girls doing dirty things to themselves. The first room I went into was a tall blond girl in her lingerie who looked pretty fucking amazing. Just as I was typing “Stick a dildo in your ass like the whore you are”, she started to blow her nose into a Kleenex. I would have been okay with it if bitch hadn’t been so graphic in trying to clear out whatever was clogging up her nose. She was shoving her finger in the thing diggin’ for clams in front of a pocket mirror. I made me want to throw up so I didn’t end up wasting my free credits on her and that means I never saw her real clam.

She didn’t care that dudes are trying to jerk off to her. She didn’t care that dude’s have no interest in seeing that shit. It was probably her passive aggressive way of saying she doesn’t give a fuck about us or our needs, she just wants our money and until she gets our money she’s just going to sit there waiting like we’re not there and even if that means scratching her ass, blowing her nose, popping her pimples or doing her fucking laundry and any other disgusting habits she’s got, she’s going to do them.

Kimmy Stewart is a lot like this webcam whore, she walks around with her face out in the public making us all sick to our stomachs distracting us from her hot legs. If she was to walk around with a mask on, or a hood over her face, or a Muslim costume while showing off her legs, you’d think she was a hot piece of ass you’d want to fuck, instead we don’t have the chance to enjoy a good thing or wait for bitch takes off the mask, hood or Muslim costume to have all the dreams of cumming inside her wash away. She just puts it all out there…

So if you’re an ugly girl with hot legs, ass or tits don’t feel afraid to cover up your problem spots, even if it’s your face. If you’re a webcam whore, try not to do disgusting things when guys are watching you. I am just trying to help you get ahead.

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Legs|Unsorted

2007

17

May

I am – Ugly Kimmy Stewart and Her Legs of the Day

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I just rolled out of bed because I was tired and really didn’t have anything to get up for. It’s not like I have a job to go to, or appointments to meet and during the day is the only time my wife isn’t taking up 3/4 of the fucking bed and I can get some fucking sleep.

I decided that today would be a good day to treat myself to some lunch, so I end up in this restaurant half asleep and unshowered because I woke up hungry and the dude in line in front of me knows the fucking staff and is chatting them up. At first he’s being a little loud but it’s not that noticeable because I wasn’t really paying attention. Then asshole starts making lame joke after lame joke in this big fucking voice and I start thinking to myself that this asshole thinks he’s a fucking stand-up comedian and he fucking sucks and doesn’t realize he fucking sucks. Then I hear his friend ask him how his stand-up act is coming along, and it turns out the asshole is a fucking stand-up comedian, obviously not a very successful one and the kind who only has one good joke and that joke is that no one laughs to any of his jokes.

Either way, it got me thinking, how does someone decide to be a stand-up comedian. Do their parents and grandparents give them so much positive reinforcement by telling them that they are so fucking funny all their fucking life that they make the motherfucker tell jokes at family functions where the whole family cracks the fuck up because they are just as lame as he is because they made him but dude’s so fucking so drowned in compliments about how funny he is that he starts believing it and drops all inhibitions that normal people have and decides that it’s ok for him to take the family function act to the fucking public by being a total loud asshole in public when people are just innocently trying to do their jobs and people are just trying to innocently trying to order their food.

It was pretty fucking presumptuous of him to tho that to us, but I have a feeling that he thought he was doing us all a favor by giving us a free show, like in his mind I just walked into Bob Dylan busking on the street corner, but the reality of the whole fucking thing is that I didn’t buy a ticket to his show, I didn’t sign up to listen to shitty fucking jokes, I just wanted some lunch. Maybe I should have said something, but I got better shit to do , like stare at the chick he was with’s ass. Motherfucker.

Here’s some Kimmy Stewart who probably was told how pretty she was all her life by her parents polluting her brain into thinking she actually can go out in public without a mask on, but at least she’s got hot fucking legs to give me something to focus on…

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Legs|Unsorted

2007

02

May

I am – Kimmy Stewart Getting Dressed Like a Clown at Coachella of the Day

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The problem with strip clubs is that the girls who are there with their boyfriends or husbands, usually there for the first time are a lot fucking hotter than any of the strippers who are up on stage. The last time I was at a strip club there was a pretty hot blonde chick who looked like she just got out of bed, in sweatpants and shoes that looked like slippers, like her and her boyfriend were in the middle of banging before he stopped her because it wasn’t working for him and that he had to run to the strippers to get inspired with new tits or some shit. But year, that half asleep looking girl was substantially hotter than any of the strippers and I ended up spending my whole night staring at her, until the boyfriend came up to me and told me to fuck off. Luckily they had some Larry King playing on one of the TV screens that was supposed to be for porn and my girl Oprah was on because Oprah is my porn and strippers are just a waste of fucking space when they’re ugly….

Either way, here are pictures of Kimmy Stewart at Coachella dressed way too over the top for me to understand what the fuck is going on. Is she a clown or doing a drag show because I have seen Halloween costumes with less fucking intensity. The fag with the penis haircut and valet vest is almost prettier to look at, which doesn’t make me gay, it just means that Kimbo is that fucking ugly because that dude is a total cunt and from my experience, just cuz bitch wears a bikini top, doesn’t mean bitch is a bitch…if you know what I mean.. Cuddles….

Related Posts:

I am – Kimmy Stewart is Still Ugly

I am – Kimberly Stewart Dressed Like a Clown

I am – Kimberly Stewart’s Bikini

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Stripper|Unsorted

2007

02

Apr

I am – Lohan and Kimbo Stewart are Best Friends Who Dress the Same of the Day

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Lohan and Kimbo Stewart are already such good friends that I have never seen together before that they are already wearing matching outfits like they were 7 and this was fucking kindergarten. They are like watching two seven year olds running around the park in matching outfits only these girls aren’t 7 anymore, the only thing they have in common with the number 7 is that they banged 7 different dude’s last week along, at least Lohan did…

Either way, these girls are like the kind of friends who go to grade school together, then highschool together where they lost their virginity, then college together where they lost it some more, then get married the same year after college to the guys who gave them herpes who happen to be best friends too, then have babies together, they are like attached at the fucking hip, sisters who aren’t sisters, only in Lohan’s case they just met last week….

Speaking of sisters, I always loved when my stepdaughters would pretend that they were twins and wear matching outfits, so when they got older, I used to buy them matching panty sets to wear around the dumpster I call home. I got so into it that I had a different lingerie set for them to wear every day of the week, from the sailer girls to the school girls to the cats…meow. I guess it probably wasn’t the most morally sound thing to do but they didn’t seem to mind, and since they didn’t mind either did I. My wife put all the fun to an end when I tried setting up bath time for them and they complained. Bitches.

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2007

28

Mar

I am – Kimberly Stewart Has Good Legs of the Day

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The problem with writing a site like this is that every fucking blogger drops the same fucking joke. I had some pics I almost posted yesterday of Hilary Duff in a cleavage dress, pretending she has tits and I didn’t bother because the joke was too easy. I went to the site called TheSuperficial about 10 minutes ago and saw that motherfucker dropped a lamer version of the same joke. Having a celebrity site is like sitting in a room with a bunch of virgins brainstorming on different variations of the same joke until one of them gets chosen, only in this world, all the shitty brainstormed ideas that would normally get flushed down the fucking toilet make it out on the idiot who suggested it’s personal site…It’s like people with no business writing anything, myself included, somehow have a fucking audience and are making boat loads of money, myself excluded, when before having these sites they would spend their nights thinking about jerking off to porn, and going to bed feeling dirty and guilty about having had those thoughts…..

Speaking of dirty and guilty, here are some pics of Kimberly Stewart from a couple of days ago, still looking like her dad beat her up with one of his many Platinum records, repeatedly, over the course of her childhood, permanently ruining her but leaving her long Model legs that she got from her long model legged mother untouched because he knew they were the ticket to getting her useless self off his payroll and onto some other asshole who she married, like a poor rich virgin who once ran a celebrity site before selling it to AOL for 100,000,000 dollars’….

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Unsorted

2007

14

Mar

I am – Kimmy Stewart Is Still Ugly of the Day

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There was once a time when I couldn’t turn on my computer without seeing some Kimmy Stewart bullshit. It was never really that fun for me but she’s been laying low for the last few months, which is a pretty good thing because she looks like her dad accidentally ran over her face with his Rolls Royce while he was drunk from writing that Maggy May song and she was drunk from sucking Jack Osborne’s Dick.

Point of this post is to say, where the fuck has this bitch gone. When people lay low it means a few things, either they are in a relationship, they have AIDS or they have taken up heroin. I know Kelly dropped some AIDS and her family member shit and I guess Kimmy could be the source….

If Kimmy happens to die, I think her legacy should be that she was the only rich person in history who couldn’t make themselves decent enough for me to fuck….I don’t know if that made sense, I am still fucked up on allergy pills and I have no standards, but even with no standards I wouldn’t bang’er but I would bang a car’s exhaust pipe at a busy intersection. Hope that brought my point home.

Posted in:Kimberly Stewart|Unsorted