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Archive for the Kylie Minogue Category

2014

25

Mar

Kylie Minogue’s Hot in Some Magazine at 100 of the Day

The other day Kylie Minogue reminded us that Breast Cancer didn’t rob her of her femininity…but rather did the opposite because she’s hotter than ever and I am all about her SEXERCIZE VIDEO despite memories of her in the early 90s making it hard for me to be into someone born the same decade as her…you see, because she’s old as fuck…

But here she is in some magazine, looking amazing, like some kind of freak of nature who can’t really be australian, since every Australian I know, turns into some kind of shrivelled looking sun damaged alligator-faced monster that could have killed Steve Irwin, if the stingray didn’t beat them to it…

So I’m here thinking maybe the cancer treatments also killed the aging process, or maybe she’s now some genetic freak, but ultimately, none of that matters, what matters is that she’s perfect.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2014

21

Mar

Kylie Miogue’s Sexercize Video of the Day

I feel like I did the locomotion in the late 80s, when Kylie Minogue was in her 20s, meaning that she must be in her 70s now, and for 70, she’s looking pretty good.

In fact, she’s looking better than most girls in their 40s, at least in this in Gym white Leotard erotica that features twerking, humping the dildo swiss ball, it’s a real sex toy, and all kind of other moves that remind me of every time I work out…

It was filmed by Roman Coppola, and they did good…It’s up on some Call On Me, work out erotica. I watched it on mute…because I don’t like Kylie Minogue’s music as much as her cancer surviving, but I will say that this makes me want to hang with more 70 year old bitches at the gym…a little geriatric aquarobics motehrfuckers.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2014

31

Jan

Kylie Minogue Spinning Properly of the Day

Like a gay man working on getting fit enough for his HIV ridden South American import he’s trying to get a work visa for…I have done a spinning class once…and I did survive…

My motivation…was to be locked in a room with sweaty babes in tight clothes…

What I experienced was not so many sweaty babes in tight clothes…but more fat chicks trying to be sweaty babes pig in the city….and at least one of them kept farting…

What I didn’t experience was proper heels and tight dress apparel like Kylie Minogue brings…

Kylie Minogue may barely exist since the cancer, but shit…she still brings it.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2013

12

Dec

Kylie Minogue Legs in Her Red Bottoms of the Day

OH shit…Kylie Minogue, who must be a robot because she still looks good at 75, I mean I remember doing the locomotion in the 80s, and she was running shit then…not to mention she survived cancer with her tits…and now she’s showing off her red bottom shoes like some stripper or fame whore or ghetto club girl on instagram…and I don’t really have a foot fetish, or heel fetish, or expensive shoe fetish, but I do when it involves someone who is not wearing pants…cuz skin pants are my favorite…

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2013

17

Oct

Kylie Minogue’s 2014 Calendar of the Day

Breast Cancer survivor Kylie Minogue has a 2014 Calendar out, which makes sense because she’s in her 40s, and still remembers a time when calendars were relevant, and people did not have computers or smart phones…you know a simpler time when creepers would put their favorite pin-up in their locker at the shop, or in the garage they worked at, because knowing the date comes in handy while counting the days off until you die…

I don’t know if this is a breast cancer campaign, which would make sense, because why would she need the 500 dollars she’ll make selling these to her 8 fans who would actually pay for this…while the other 30 fans she’s got will wait until 2015 when they can pick it up for a discount….

But I do know that she’s looking pretty fucking awesome considering everything she’s been through, like being born in the 60s.

If that doesn’t excite you – because Calendars are Some Dated Shit – Here’s a fashion video she did for GQ Germany…

Posted in:Kylie Minogue|SFW

2013

16

Aug

Kylie Minogue Holding Her Tits for POP Magazine of the Day


I guess Kylie Minogue was having a flashback to her pre-cancerous tits, because she posted this 2006 POP magazine cover on her instagram for Throwback thursday, of her grabbing at her tits…

I kinda get the vibe that this is framed on her wall, as a tribute to what was…not that she really had tits then, or doesn’t have tits now and I am just assuming that when they found the cancer, they took out her nipples, as they often do, like she was Angelina, because that is the responsible thing to do…

But I guess with or without her nipples, she’ll always have this cover..and she looks pretty amazing, good enough for me to book a trip to Australia in a time machine yo..cuz I can do the locomotion…but I’d rather she does it…on my face.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2013

25

Jul

Kylie Minogue Rockin’ The One Piece of the Day

I guess it makes sense that she’d be in a one-piece, with being 90 and all.

I respect that unlike other 90 year old bitches who have even a worse body than Kylie the Cancer survivor, she’s in the one piece…rather than half naked in a bikini….not that I mind anyone in a bikini…I just think at a certain age, the classy thing to do is never even think about putting one on…

I get it, old bitches like competing with young bitches, usually their daughters, to feel like they still got it…but there’s really no contest, and even if they are fit, they really always come in second…so deal with the awkward tan lines…take the high road…and remember your bikini days are behind you….and now all you have to look forward to is death.

To See The Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE  

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2013

10

May

Kylie Minogue Slaps Her Own Ass on Twitter of the Day

Kylie Minogue posted this stupid picture of her slapping her own ass, in what I call Technology making triplet fantasies come true for those bitches who aren’t triplets but who you wish were, except there’s not enough eating herself out or fucking herself with a strap on to really make it count…remember it’s not incest if you’re from the same litter, it’s masturbation and it is definitely not incest if you were photoshopped to look this way….

Boring, I know. Posting it anyway. Deal.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2013

28

Jan

Kylie Minogue Gets Sexy For Australia Day of the Day

It’s nice to see that cancer didn’t get Kylie Minogue down…unless it was just a publicity stunt to justify why her pop albums were awkward….seeing as she was in her 40s…pretending it was still the fucking locomotion….

When it doubt blame it on cancer…I mean it’s something I’ve been doing for years in efforts to get free meals at restaurants….free movies…and free trips to Disneyland….

But cancer or not…she’s a survivor…and more importantly a patriotic as she’s doing her country like it was a record exec in the 80s before she got her first deal….rocking this Australia flag in her Australia Day pics….like it was a cumshot….

Posted in:Kylie Minogue