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Archive for the Maria Sharapova Category

2007

29

Jun

I am – Maria Sharapova Down Shirt Tennis Post of the Day

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I figure that a lot of you fuckers like sports because otherwise athletes wouldn’t be making millions of dollars. If the whole world worked the way I work, then strippers would be the main attraction at arenas and these bitches would be makin way more money than Hollywood Stars and people in sports combined, but I guess that doesn’t really matter to you.

What does matter is that as long as there is a sport that allows women to maintain some level of sex appeal, whether it be by not being bulky as fuck, whether it be by not being lesbionic as fuck, whether it be not having cocks taped to the inside of their legs because they are really dudes trying to excel like in every shitty cliche movie, then I am all for posting pictures of the girls involved bending over, showing their asses, wearing little tight shorts and rockin’ camel toe.

These are pictures of Sharapova, a girl you all want to throw a ball at, but you’re ball would be attached to your dick and your game would last a lot less that a normal match she’s used to because you have premature ejaculation issues and vaginas are like to forbidden fruit you’ve never seen so you’d get overwhelmed with the hole thing and blow it.

I snuck into the professional ladies tennis match that happens here every 2 years last year and I couldn’t really follow the game, their squeals distracted me, on my way out I say Sharapova in person, she’s really not that hot, sorry to break it to you, but she’s a pro athlete and she may look good compared to the people she is up against like the Williams sisters, but that’s like saying my gonorrhea discharge is sexy because it’s not herpes – ya heard?

Posted in:Athlete|Maria Sharapova|Tennis|Tits|Unsorted

2007

28

Jun

I am – Tennis Bitches of the Day

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So I don’t really watch sports ever because I am not a real man. I was asked if I was gay yesterday because i had my hand on a dude’s shoulder. I was drunk and trying to keep myself from falling but still didn’t take offense to the question. I know that real men don’t run sites like this because they are too busy doing construction but reality is that dudes don’t get me hard and never have. Unfortunately, either do women but that is because I have a medical problem, and I keep on trying.

In my life I never thought for a second that I was fag, I always was fascinated by pussy way too much, so much that I would rather watch a porn than watch a bunch of dudes in tights tackling each other. To me sports were pretty fuckin’ homo and even people who played sports were semi-homo too because to shower with a group of men while slapping their asses and thinking about gangbanging the cheerleaders never seemed 100 percent straight. So that said, I am okay with holding a dude’s shoulder, I am ok not watching sports and sticking to watching porn, I am okay with jocks thinking I am a pussy or a fag because I won’t shower with them but when sports become porn, I always make an effort to tune in…

These are some pictures from Wimbeldon of Girls Playing Tennis, and to me this shit is better than porno, bitches bend over, cry screams of pleasure like they are taking it up the ass, flash their tennis panties non-stop, tits flop everywhere, camel toes always happen, and that is why I like
spending my summers next to the local tennis courts…Enjoy.

I guess the shit I love about Pro Tennis though, is that all these Russian bitches dominate and I know they have cousins out there with a lot less broad shoulders and a lot less muscle mass that are totally mail order…and mail order brides are the new high school sweetheart. True Story.

Daniela Hantuchova

Maria Sharapova

Maria Kirilenko

Tatiana Golovin

Posted in:Camel Toe|Daniela Hantuchova|Maria Kirilenko|Maria Sharapova|Tatiana Golovin|Uncategorized|Unsorted|Wimbeldon|Women's Tennis

2007

13

Jun

I am – Maria Sharapova Practising her Tennis of the Day

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I figure since you’re a bunch of lazy perverts, you’ll appreciate watching or looking at pictures of one of the hottest bitches in tennis training. You can look at her struggling with her ball, bending over, stretching and making forced faces that are similar to the faces she’d make banging you and pretend that she is banging you, because you are creepy….

I decided that I should become a stand up comedian because it’s a life that is designed for fat losers with nothing much to say but nonsense they come up with while sitting at home getting drunk alone in efforts to forget how much their lives suck.

The reason they think they have it in them to be stand up comedians is because their better looking friends always tell them that they are funny because there’s really not much else going for them and when trying to prevent your fat loser friend from killing themselves, you go for whatever it is you can to make them feel better about themselves.

The only real reason why their funny is because they are overcompensating for their inability to look good enough to fuck and some asshole told them that humor is the fastest way into a girls pants while forgetting to tell them that that only applies after all the good looking and successful guys are unavailable.

So stand up comedy is this who fucking pool of assholes who have this delusional idea of having what it takes.

Since I figure I fit the part, here are some jokes I wrote in efforts to live the fucking loser dream:

Maybe fag’s are into to you because you are an asshole

That’s pretty much all I’ve got….

Posted in:Ass|Athlete|Jock|Maria Sharapova|Tennis|Uncategorized|Unsorted|Working Out

2007

26

Mar

I am – Maria Sharapova's Stretchin' Ass of the Day

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I went to a random strip club with a friend of mine the other day that had the weirdest fucking thing on the menus. For 2 dollars you could get a plate of cheese and crackers, but I am not talking luxurious cheeses, I’m talking kraft singles on saltines. I can’t say no to the most ghetto meal in the fucking world because beggars like me take what we can get and I ended up spending my 20 dollar budget on 10 rounds of this shit…The highlight of the club wasn’t really the cheese though, it was the fact that the place was full service and bitches suck your dick in the booth for 40 dollars. I couldn’t test it out because I only found out about it after I spent my budget on their food menu, but at least I showed those whore that I was a baller with my 10 empty plates with 20 cheese slice plastic wrapping scattered around the table…

Speaking of cheese, here are some pics of Maria Sharapova stretching because girls in sports are usually disgusting and she’s the exception to the rule….

Bonus: While on Tennis here is a pic of Venus Williams proving that she’s like that movie “Ladybug” and really has a cock.

Posted in:Jocks|Maria Sharapova|Unsorted

2007

26

Mar

I am – Maria Sharapova’s Stretchin’ Ass of the Day

maria_sharapova_stretch10.jpg

I went to a random strip club with a friend of mine the other day that had the weirdest fucking thing on the menus. For 2 dollars you could get a plate of cheese and crackers, but I am not talking luxurious cheeses, I’m talking kraft singles on saltines. I can’t say no to the most ghetto meal in the fucking world because beggars like me take what we can get and I ended up spending my 20 dollar budget on 10 rounds of this shit…The highlight of the club wasn’t really the cheese though, it was the fact that the place was full service and bitches suck your dick in the booth for 40 dollars. I couldn’t test it out because I only found out about it after I spent my budget on their food menu, but at least I showed those whore that I was a baller with my 10 empty plates with 20 cheese slice plastic wrapping scattered around the table…

Speaking of cheese, here are some pics of Maria Sharapova stretching because girls in sports are usually disgusting and she’s the exception to the rule….

Bonus: While on Tennis here is a pic of Venus Williams proving that she’s like that movie “Ladybug” and really has a cock.

Posted in:Jocks|Maria Sharapova|Unsorted