So I didn’t give up on the Token Gay Blogger, even though he thought I did. I just overlooked this post of his for a day because I was out getting drunk and I like making people feel insecure about themselves, it usually keeps them on their toes to pump out stronger, better, faster posts that will actually make me famous. So I am still convinced the Gay Blogger is going to make all the difference for me, while Michelle Trachtenberg may be making all the difference for the Jewish girls she used to go to summer camp with….it gives them massive street cred at temple….
Here is his post:
So I was walking down the street today and I noticed there was a lot of traffic, which I thought was strange for the hour of the day. As I kept walking, I came to a crosswalk where there was this homeless guy, standing in the middle of the street directing traffic. Of course he was no good at it because he was homeless, which means he was drunk and/or high and/or crazy and he was causing all kinds of confusion. People were honking at him and screaming and just generally pissed off. But I thought “Good for you Homeless Guy! Grab life by the horns and go for it!” See, he could’ve been like every other homeless person and just sit on the sidewalk and ask for change or play a shitty guitar or paint a shitty painting but no, he wanted to be different so he just jumped in the middle of the road and directed traffic. He is an inspiration to us all.
Which brings me to Miss Tranchtenberg. See, she hasn’t done much since she was on Buffy, sure was in a few episodes of Six Feet Under and a few shitty movies, but she is not doing all that much to separate herself from every other young starlet. So what’s her solution? Putting on whoreish red lipstick? Sorry, sweetheart, Xtina already did it (and she looked a trillion times better too). I think Michelle needs to take some lessons from our homeless friend and do something daring. So, Michelle, wipe off the whore lipstick and do something unexpected.
Like make a sequel to Harriet the Spy.