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Archive for the Reese Witherspoon Category

2014

02

Oct

Reese Witherspoon in Tights of the Day

Want to know something that I don’t like…Reese Witherspoon in a pair of tights.

I also don’t really like that back before she was really famous, she got knocked up on set of Cruel Intentions and instead of an abortion like a normal girl getting knocked up, she made Ryan Philippe commit and make her 12 more babies, that’s the way good southern Christians work…it reminds me that at any given time – my unprotected sex may end up a living hell. She’s the poster girl for that…but the good new is that girls aren’t dumb enough to have my kid, and more importantly, it all worked out pretty well for Philippe. Reese got really fucking famous, we’re talking A-List…and probably bankrolls his broke ass because pretty boys don’t last forever…they are easily replaced…

So looking at this mom ass doesn’t excite me…it may excite you…it’s better than any ass you’ve had…and those girls weren’t even moms…they were just fat and half retarded and lonely…

But this mom ass represents hope…of a better tomorrow…

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Posted in:Reese Witherspoon

2014

07

Jan

Reese Witherspoon Bikinis in Hawaii of the Day

Here is the opposite of a bikini bridge …where a mom of 10 and her chubby alcoholic pushing 40 folds hang over the spot where the bridge is supposed to happen…making it less about the bikini…and more about the tidal wave of fat that’s been sent to take out the bridge like it was a natural disaster…we’re talking a Tsunami…when the very thing the bridge is designed to cover and transport you safely from point a to point b…retaliates and takes out the bridge…living it just fragments of fabric people in the future will find and wonder what was once there…

Pretty horrible…but I’m still looking…this bitch needs some special effects to look better than her doughy self looks…

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Posted in:Reese Witherspoon

2013

05

Jul

Reese Witherspoon’s Horrible Bathing Suit Pics of the Day



I appreciate the attempt to cover-up, you know by wearing the one piece to cover her ravaged stomach thanks to good wholesome southern cooking and baby making…but she didn’t try hard enough. I mean she has the kind of body that needs to remain in clothes at the beach, you know like she’s got a sun allergy or some shit, in a snow suit maybe, because seeing her melting ass and boxy square shaped body, doesn’t only remind me that she’s never been hot, she’s always been fat and sloppy, but also that there is no God.

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Posted in:Reese Witherspoon

2013

13

Jun

Reese Witherspoon is Mooning You of the Day

Reese Witherspoon is disgusting…so seeing her brat ass being flashed to the paparazzi like they were the Police and she was being arrested for hard drinking and driving and being an uncooperative cunt, is pretty much up her redneck new money alley, but it’s so unfortunate that it happened, I mean seeing so much lumpy flesh on the street is far past it’s expiration date. In fact, Reese Witherspoon, even at her peak, was a lumpy pile of fleshy shit, but the good news is that unlike sexy clothes on drunk or medicated women, this shit is a surefire rape deterrent, so I am gonna assume that’s what being done here…scientific research, like the clamp/claw/blade female condom that bites unwelcome cock, the hollywood bare ass edition.

Horrible.


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Posted in:Reese Witherspoon

2013

03

May

The Reese Witherspoon Arrest Tapes of the Day

The Reese Witherspoon arrest is a nice example of her true colors, she’s a cunt, but I could have already told you that and I’ve never met her, but more importantly, her pussy actor husband not having her back as he shits himself getting arrested, because his cushy bullshit life doesn’t take well to real situations like getting arrested, and says “I had nothing to do with that”….in a broken voice…because these people, when you strip away their money, can’t handle the simple things in life in a normal way, they think, because we make them think, that they are important, above the law and run the fucking country, even though all they do is play make belief. Fuck em all. I am just bummed she wasn’t sent to county, prison raped, and taught a few lessons of how the world, when you’re not a millionaire celebrity people suck up all the time, works.

The worst thing in all this, is that I still think this is a publicity stunt to promote her movie and get her in the news.

Posted in:Reese Witherspoon

2013

25

Mar

Reese Witherspoon’s Unfortunate Bathing Suit Experience of the Day

This is the reason I don’t read my twitter feed….Seriously. Celebrating Reese Witherspoon’s birthday with what may be the most offensive pics of a woman in a bathing suit in the last decade, all fat and sloppy because lets face it, she was fat and sloppy in the 90s when she first started getting pregnant, but she managed to carry herself though it in ways that tricked people into giving her an Oscar. This whole southern girl with good morals and values who traps the high school quarterback with her uterus, ruining his career. A church goer, who gets knocked up out of wedlock, because she’s full of shit, literally, at least according to her belly in these bathing suit pics.

Defend her all you want, she’s pushing 40, has kids, I get it…but fuck there’s no excuse for this level of sloppy. Bitch needs to hit the beach in a snow suit.

Warning – You Can’t Unsee These Pics


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Posted in:Reese Witherspoon

2013

06

Mar

Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore and Reese Witherspoon Together in Bikinis of the Day

I am not even going to bother posting the pics of Drew Barrymore and Reese Witherspoon in their bathing suits…Cameron Diaz is looking horrible enough for the group and she’s the fucking babe of the party….

I mean the idea of middle aged chicks in bikinis to being with is offensive as shit…keep you fucking bathrobe on bitches…no one wants to see this shit…not even your husbands…they are just with you cuz you’re famous…and allow them to fuck younger girls cuz you don’t want the public divorce….

I mean shit…just click the link…it’s that fucking bad…worse than showing up to a Caribbean resort in Blackface and expecting to get a laugh from the black locals…their behavior, thinking they can pull this off, is just as fucking offensive….it’s like say behind your rich person gated pool that security keeps the paparazzi away from….

Long are the days that they had sex appeal….not that I ever though doughy Barrymore ever had sex appeal…like you did that first time you saw ET…..and I never thought Witherspoon the vagina that trapped Ryan Philippe from fun with 12 kids was sexy….but jesus christ they looked a hell of a lot better than this….

Where they are now…is horrible…and the real sad thing in all this…is I would eat all their asses right after they took a shit and didn’t wipe…cuz I am a sick motherfucker…but that doesn’t mean I don’t think they look like shit….


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Posted in:Cameron Diaz|Drew Barrymore|Reese Witherspoon

2012

21

Mar

Reese Witherspoon’s Gunt is Probably Caused By an Occupied Uterus of the Day

Reese Witherspoon could just be Bloated, fat, Swollen in the uterus from her previous dozen kids….dumpy from always being dumpy, you know a little too into souther fried cooking to ever really be fit….I mean since she first hit Hollywood she played the fat chick as far as I’m concerned, sure it was the fat chick who controlled her fatness as hard as she could before getting knocked up on set of Cruel Intentions, only to tricky homie into marrying her, and living a horrible life with her, before her good Christian values that I like to call a fucking lie, led her to another homie, who has been rumored to have knocked her up, occupying her swollen gunt she’s always had, but now has a reason for having….and like all good Christian Women, she’s remaried, so this isn’t a bastard brewing, it’s just you know, another kid to add to her army, made by different sperm, like she was a ghetto fucking stripper in line at WalMart with 4 kids all a different shade of brother. If you know waht I mean.


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Posted in:Reese Witherspoon

2012

10

Feb

Reese Witherspoon’s Shitty Dumpy Legs of the Day

I hate on Reese Witherspoon for one reason and one reason only…..she’s the fucking devil and I need to bring her down…everyone thinks she’s this great mother, wholesome housewife who was cheated on and forced to remarry….when I know she’s a fucking movie star…and all movie stars…despite how many pictures of them you see going to church on Sundays…are vapid, spoiled, rude, disgusting, money grubbing whores….trash that if they actually cared wouldn’t be practicing lines in the mirror…but would instead be helping save AIDS babies for an organization or some shit….

Here are her shitty legs….to remind you that despite all her working out…she’s still disgusting.

DOWN WITH WITHERSPOON….


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Posted in:Reese Witherspoon