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Archive for the Tara Reid Category

2008

13

May

Tara Reid Rockin’ Out on the Bikini Because It’s All She Does of the Day

It turns out that even party sluts need a break every once in a while, you know sometimes they just want to put the binge drinking, late night coke parties, random hook ups, dancing on the bar in a bikini top like an eternal spring break party on the back burner to feel like a normal person. They usually do this by settling down with some random guy they met in the club and it lasts for about a week, until she realizes how fuckin’ boring relationships are and she ends up sneaking out when dude is asleep and goes back to her party slut ways.

The good news is that in the meantime, Tara Reid is settling down by getting in a bikini on the beach with the dude she’s using to feel like a normal 35 year old, because bitch’s body looks pretty fuckin’ banging and drunk or not, I’m down with staring at it.


See More High Res Pics of Tara Reid in Her Bikini in the Forum
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Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Tara Reid

2008

11

Apr

Tara Reid’s is a Star Party Girl of the Day

Tara Reid is a machine and parties all the time. I don’t think she gets enough credit for the work that she does because going out is a total pain in the ass. Everyone hates on her for being useless but the truth is that she draws a crowd when she hits these clubs like some d-list rockstar and she’s constantly bringing her A-game.

I know when I get wasted in barsI am pretty much tapped out for a week. I get 2 day hangovers and usually don’t leave my bed until my wife gets into it but that’s just because there’s not enough room for the two of us. That’s life as a fat man with a fat wife and that’s probably part of the reason why I don’t have the same kind of stamina as Tara Reid.

The good news is that I still drink everyday, but there’s just something easier about getting wasted in a gutter alone than having to make conversation with useless people while trying to look your best, which is something I never have to do because I’m no miracle worker and can’t help but look like a wreck. I guess that’s just one of the many reason’s I’m not like Tara Reid, other reasons include not having fake tits, not having money, not being someone people want to have sex with and not wearing my wallpaper out as a dress because I don’t even have wallpaper. I know…I’m pretty much good for nothing.

Posted in:Party Girl|Tara Reid

2008

31

Mar

Tara Reid Hangs With Men in Miami of the Day

It was the Winter Music Conference in Miami this past week and I wanted to send someone there to get video footage of all the crazy party people high on drugs, but the WMC decided that my site wasn’t legit or cool enough to cover their shitty week of club djs and I got rejected, so I had to tell the unemployed dude in Miami who owned a video camera that his dreams of being an online TV producer for a shitty site no one reads will have to wait until I trick the WMC that the site isn’t a waste of internet space next year, which turns out to be a pretty hard task because I kinda agree with them.

These are some pictures of Tara Reid on the beach in Miami during the WMC with various men who I can only assume are DJs, club promoters and drug dealers who are in town to support their party lifestyle/industry, because she’s a staple in the club scene internationally and probably won some kind of award for being at the most parties in the last 5 years than any other living human being. I think whatever trophy she got will look good next to her haggard cocaine face, or even next to her old liver she had bronzed after she finally scored that transplant of the liver she stole from 18 year old party girl on Springbreak who she invited back to her room for some exclusive hotel party, at least that’s the only explanation I have for how bitch keeps going.

Posted in:Miami|Party|Slut|Tara Reid|WMC

2008

24

Mar

Tara Reid is a Good Drunk of the Day

For someone who has drank a lot everyday for many years, Tara Reid proves to be a pretty articulate drunk. She’s barely slurring her words on the Red Carpet of some event she’s hosting at some shitty Studio 54 club in Vegas that is some kind of novelty take on the original but probably has absolutely nothing in common with it because that’s just how lame rip offs work. I guess the sad part of this interview is that Tara Reid wishes she was old enough to party at the original Studio 54 because that was the heyday for glamorous partying and now everyone seems to be doin’ the club thing and it’s about as exclusive as Paris Hilton’s vagina, which has proven to not be very exclusive at all.

I am hungover, I drank a lot for Jesus and his resurrection, while after peaking and being convinced I had alcohol poisoning while laying on the bathroom floor of the seedy bar I go to, I decided to resurrect myself and do a few more shots of whiskey and try to sexually harass a few more women, like some kind of son of god on Easter weekend but the way cooler version.

Either way, watch the video.

Posted in:Drunk|Tara Reid

2008

20

Mar

Tara Reid is a Spring Break Mess of the Day

I wonder what the Cancun Airport smells like when the Spring Break week is over and all the college whores head back to their normal lives. I am thinking like stale beer, cigarettes, cum and aids….a lot like Tara Reid’s vagina.

These are some pictures of our All American Sweetheart arriving in LA after her Cancun party weekend, reliving the last 10 years of her life, since she’s always on fuckin’ Spring Break all year round and she doesn’t even go to school or work because spring break is her job. The bad news is that shit is catching up to her as her face slowly falls off her body…the good news is that all those fees she charges to show up to your party can cover the cost of plastic surgery. I say she’s got another solid 10 years in her before she’s gotta hang up the bikini and sleep it off because this bitch is stamina.

Posted in:Mess|Spring Break|Tara Reid

2008

17

Mar

Tara Reid Does Spring Break in Cancun of the Day

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

Sure Tara Reid never went to college, but she played enough roles in movies as the all-american college girl, and that’s probably just as good of an education as American colleges offer. Reality is that half the population already think she’s some college graduate because they saw it happen on screen and to them that is reality because no one has ever taught them the difference between real or fake. This are the same people who are taping pictures of their favorite stars to their pocket pussies and bringing them home to meet their parents when their mom’s bug them enough to finally meet their girlfriends…..

Reality is that Tara Reid doesn’t need an education, she has more money than most people who work all their lives and she has the luxury of living the college party girl until she dies of alcohol poisoning at 40 and here she is in her early 30s rockin’ out in Cancun during Spring Break like she was 18. Sure she’s not flashing her tits, or eating pussy on stage like the other college girls but she’s a seasoned veteran there to offer support to the fresh meat on their first encounter with STDs from multiple sex partners in any given day because she’s already been there and done that. The good news is that she’s not a fat mid western wreck like most Cancun party goers, so here she is in a bikini sobering up before the big nights she has ahead of her hosting Middle Aged Women Gone Wild…because that’s pretty much what she is and that’s why I want to see her naked.

The Paparazzi Made Me Take Down the Pics But You Can See Them Here
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Posted in:Bikini|Cancun|Spring Break|Tara Reid

2008

04

Mar

Tara Reid Never Looked So Good of the Day

These are some pictures of Tara Reid from this past weekend, I think it’s safe to say that she’s drunk and lookin’ her age as her face slowly falls off her face as fast as the cocaine got sucked up her nose off the club’s toilet seat for the last 10 years.

I know when I am drunk I don’t really look my best, actually in my mind I do but when the pictures surface and I’ve sobered up a bit, I realize that I actually look like a greasy rapist on some kind of rapist mission to creep out every single girl I cross paths with.

Either way, she reminds me of some kind of office Christmas party gone wrong , which is fine when it is your office Christmas party and it only goes down once a year and she’s the receptionist you’ve wanted to shove your dick inside the last 9 months she’s been working there, but it isn’t a very good look to be hustling every fuckin’ weekend when you’re old enough to be a soccer mom. At one time she was the all american poster girl for College Spring Break parties and now she’s working on being the poster girl for why you gotta stop partying so hard after college because it will rape you harder than the frat boy did that night he took you on a date and slipped roofies in your drink…you can’t hate him though…at least he took you out for pizza and a movie first.

Posted in:Disaster|Drunk|old|Tara Reid|Wasted

2008

20

Feb

Tara Reid is an Academy Award of the Day

Here are some pictures of Tara Reid dressed like a Golden Academy Award because we’re all allowed to have dreams and if you can’t win one, you might as well be one. She’s at some She’s all socially conscious at some Live Earth event and I’m not talking about knowing where the next big party is or what time she’s meeting her friends for more drinks at the exclusive after-party like the socially conscious party sluts I know, I mean doing good for the environment by promoting the Smart Car for some Live Earth event that she is probably getting paid to do because the only Live Earth Tara Reid knows is a shot she once had at a college Frat party in Mexico during Spring Break that lead to her getting gang banged….

I am a fan of the fake tan, but I am also the kind of guy who only interacts with strippers and considers spending an afternoon in the waiting room of a Tanning Salon a good time because I get to see the cheesy bitches outside of their club elements. I am also a fan of Lionel Richie and all thing trying to emulate him.

To be fair, Tara Reid spends most of her time in the dark, where trying to figure out how much is too much especially when all the girls around you are more orange than you are because having a glowing face igets you noticed, not to mention she was probably wasted when she did her make up, and I know that whenever I am wasted and end up putting on my wife’s make-up to cater to her lesbian fantasies, I always end up lookin like a 300 pound tranny who just got punched in the face by a group of preschool finger painters….


Related Posts:

Tara Reid Upskirt Moment
Tara Reid is a Drunken Mess
Some Tara Reid See Through Nipple
Tara Reid is a Washed Up Drunken Party Girl

Posted in:Bronzer|Fake Tan|Skinny|Tara Reid

2007

26

Nov

I am – Tara Reid’s Got Skinny Legs of the Day

tara_reid_skinny_top.jpg

When I look at Tara Reid, I am reminded of myself. Not because I am a skinny little blonde chick with fake tits, but I wish I was, because I’d never stop trying to get into my pants, but because I am an alcoholic and respect people with the same life goals as me, that don’t involve having a respectable career and making money for the luxury life, but taking what you can get and making money to just get fucked up. Now my drinking budget is a lot more pathetic than hers and usually leaves me in the gutter blinded from drinking rubbing alcohol all night, while she’s out touring different cities in the World at the hottest parties but the foundation of what we do is the same and when blinded by rubbing alcohol you’re really in no position to be rockin’ the hottest parties anywhere but inside your heads.

Speaking of hallucinating, I had serious alcohol withdrawal after a few days of binge drinking, it was the first time it had happened to me in years but I’ve been goin’ hard lately because I have bad friends who think it’s funny to get me drunk and destructive and I was raised to never turn down a free shot of anything. So the withdrawal hit was because I didn’t have any money to get more drink in me and because I’m damaged fuckin’ goods and my brain and body can’t deal with alcohol anymore. It basically involved me laying in bed next to my furnace of a wife which is convenient since it’s winter, so she’s good for something, staring at the ceiling shaking and convulsing and having visions of a young slut bouncing on my dick which was alright until I found out she had AIDS.

Speaking of AIDS, Here’s Tara Reid drifting into full blown, if you know what I mean, if you don’t just look at them legs. I guess the party’s gotta stop sometime.


Related Posts:

Tara Reid Hot in FHM
Tara Reid’s See Through Shirt
Tara Reid’s Bikini Pictures
Tara Reid’s Shitty Ass

Posted in:Blonde|Legs|Skinny|Tara Reid|Unsorted

2007

14

Nov

I am – Tara Reid Showing Up Late for Work of the Day

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

Here are some pictures of Tara Reid showing up an hour late for work in Vancouver probably from a late night drinking. I am running late today too and it’s probably for the same reason. Based on what she’s wearing, you’d think she was showing up for the afternoon shift at the strip club and not showing up to some movie set.

I used to park outside the strip club back when I had a driver’s license and my neighbor’s car keys, before getting charged with a DUI and losing that shit and leaving my neighbor’s shit box on the side of the highway, and all the daytime strippers would show up like this. They’d be wearing their club slut coat, with track pants and a haggard face from an abusive night before, only to get inside and take the shit off for a dude who pays them 10 dollars a song, which rarely happened because it was the afternoon shift. I guess there are a lot of similarities between Tara Reid’s career and an afternoon stripper, because makin’ money rarely happens which is too bad because she still owes money on her implants she bought on credit.

Either way, I am not a fashionable person. I don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong and I generally don’t give a fuck about what a girl is wearing, I am more into what a girl isn’t wearing and how I am going to get them to take off whatever they are wearing to do a little dance for me. But that’s just because I love dancing.


Related Posts:

Tara Reid Hot in FHM Magazine
Tara Reid’s See Through Shirt
Tara Reid’s Bikini Pictures
Tara Reid’s Old Man Ass

Posted in:Haggard|Late|Tara Reid|Unsorted