Remember Lisa Loeb, I do. It was the mid-’90s and I was doing what I always did, rockin’ out to Nirvana and other grunge bands, until a cute little girl in glasses enters the scene with her guitar. She changed all of our lives, we went from fucking bitches with tattoos to ones with glasses overnight, at least I did, and it wasn’t by choice, my girlfriend got knocked up, with what I thought was my baby, until he came out retarded. I told the bitch there was no way I can create a retard baby and showed her and her butterfly tattooed ass the door. I guess the whole point of the story is that only sluts wore thongs in the mid -’90s, I bet money Lisa was granny panty all the way, cuz that’s just the image she portrayed, a wholesome girl who was a minx int he bedroom. Either way, she’s in a thong now, so let all your childhood memories, expell all over your belly (if you get off on shitty images of a bitch in glasses, that is.) Yeah, it’s still 5 am. I need sleep. Cuddles. Oh and for the record, these are from her new reality TV show. Some Jesus-evangalist shit is on TV right now that’s the shit where they try to convert insomniacs, cuz we are too cloudy brained to make rational decisions…well I am not gonna let them.

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Some guys like women who look like women, other guys like women with a bit of manliness to them. I am not implying that the guys who like butch’s are fags, I think hangin with a little dainty girl is cute, but I can also see how it gets fucking annoying. So I guess chillin with a bitch who is built like a bus, who likes to wrestle, who’s got a clit the size of a grown man’s thumb and who has a little hair on her chest isn’t the end of the world. After seeing these pics of Ryan Starr at the lingerie bowl, an American idol candidate, I realize that there is a third kind of man, and that is the kind who likes women who look like women from the neck down, and by women from the neck down, I mean a tranny from Brazil, those fuckers always throw me off, but walk like gorillas and have busted up faces. I guess Ryan Starr is to women, what American Idol is to the music industry. It’s 5 am, time to sleep. If there are typos, remember this is the drunkenstepfather, even with the new look.

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This is one of my fans. She is 16 and legally I can post this cuz she’s not showing cooter. She wrote this into me.

Dear Jesus,

I wanted to write your name on my ass but I couldn’t reach. hehe.
I am going to have sex with my boyfriend next week for the first time.
I wanted you to have a picture of my untouched body, below the belt. hehe.
I am 16 and didn’t want to get you arrested (again), so I wore underwear.
I love your site. Hope you love this picture.

Jenny

Thanks Jenny we love you too, you are probably worth getting arrested for, especially with a tight body like that. If I wasn’t impotent, I would have volunteered to be your number 1. I am in Canada and 14 is legal. Good luck with your boyfriend and his useless 16 year old dick. It may be horrible at first, but you have lots of pooning ahead of you. Remember you can’t get pregnant your first time so don’t use a condom and be sure to let him come up in you.

Keep them pictures coming,

With Love, Cuddles,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

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Everything in China is backwards. From the way they read to their slanty eyes. The fact is that they speak in binary code and are the closest thing humans have to robots. Robots with very little penises. That’s not racist, but it does explain why they celebrate New Year’s a month later than the rest of the world, actually it doesn’t really explain anything at all, I just wanted to drop some china-man disses What better way to wish all you railroad men a happy New Year, than to dis your culture.

Point of the story is that Jordan and her retarded tits never miss an opportunity to get fucked up and dance. Here are some pics of her celebrating the Chinese New Year in a see-through dress, nothing surpising, bitch is always in something see-through. Happy fuckin new year, I would eat an egg roll in celebration but I am hate MSG.

I am trying to fix my thumbnails, I don’t know shit about web design and the guy who is supposed to be setting this up for me isn’t answering my calls, which means either he’s fucking a hooker, or he’s asleep. Hopefully, I’ll have it sorted out tomorrow, cuz I know this shit is KILLIN my bandwidth, and No, I didn’t notice her herpes. LOVE>

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Everything in China is backwards. From the way they read to their slanty eyes. The fact is that they speak in binary code and are the closest thing humans have to robots. Robots with very little penises. That’s not racist, but it does explain why they celebrate New Year’s a month later than the rest of the world, actually it doesn’t really explain anything at all, I just wanted to drop some china-man disses What better way to wish all you railroad men a happy New Year, than to dis your culture.

Point of the story is that Jordan and her retarded tits never miss an opportunity to get fucked up and dance. Here are some pics of her celebrating the Chinese New Year in a see-through dress, nothing surpising, bitch is always in something see-through. Happy fuckin new year, I would eat an egg roll in celebration but I am hate MSG.

I am trying to fix my thumbnails, I don’t know shit about web design and the guy who is supposed to be setting this up for me isn’t answering my calls, which means either he’s fucking a hooker, or he’s asleep. Hopefully, I’ll have it sorted out tomorrow, cuz I know this shit is KILLIN my bandwidth, and No, I didn’t notice her herpes. LOVE>

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I am not the biggest fan of band shirts, but I do like some bands. I listen to old Rolling Stones sometimes, but that’s not why I made this my t-shirt. I did it because I like dudes who dresse up like women. It’s not gay if ‘brokeback mountain’ is wearing a skirt and bootyshorts, at least that’s what my foster dad always told me, before making me put on a dress…

Rolling Stones

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I know that it’s such a typical cliche thing to say, but I can’t avoid it. When Joe Simpson looks at these pictures it brings back memories of when his little girls would run around the house naked, like normal little girls do, it reminds him of changing their diapers and seeing their little bottoms, it reminds him of the first time he promised to make them famous if they never tell their mother about the places he touches them. I guess the positive lesson we can take from this is that you never get caught if you keep your promises. Either way, there’s no proof that this fucker molested them, but you can only assume, since he talks about their tits like the belong to him…probably because they do. Creepy motherfuckers need to be outted.

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Christina Aguilera has had breast implants, there’s not doubt about that in my mind, and I couldn’t care less. I have slept with more women with breast implants than women without implants and I prefer a natural titty any day, but my wild days were in the 90s, and in the 90s all the trashy bitches I knew had plastic titties.

The reason I know Aguilera has implants is because she parades these fuckers around town as much as possible, and that’s something only people with implants do, because the have a serious detachment from their tits, and their tits becomes accessories or toys more than part of their body. Seriously, watch flashing videos, always more implants are flashed than non-implants. The other reason I know she has implants is because her nipples aim up to the sky, and it’s so rare to find a natural tit with nipples that aim to the sky.

I don’t know why I just analyzed her tits like that, it wasn’t funny and no one cares. Just click on the pictures and leave me alone you cunt.

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