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Archive for the Claudia Schiffer Category




Claudia Schiffer in Sweaters of the Day


Claudia Schiffer and her angular, structured, strong, face…did a campaign for sweaters…because she’s 100 years old, still skinny, but grandmother aged, the grandmother of top models, and there is very little grandmother’s like more than Sweaters…

I don’t really understand how Claudia Schiffer has such fresh and youthful, almost robotic skin…that could be from good lighting, photo and make-up, she is professional…or maybe good photoshop because she is working with pros, or maybe it’s just her plastic surgery because she’s a model, superficial and vapid….rich from their looks and their looks alone…

I like to think it’s Nazi programming from Nazi Germany science…that people don’t seem to remember was only 70 years ago….a long time maybe…but it’s not like their science didn’t go anywhere…or create this…in the 70s or 60s when she was born…

I remember the 90s…and jerking off to her in Playboy because I liked her German Aryan vibe more than the other bitches of the era like Momma Africa Naomi Campbell and Miss America Cindy Crawford…so this sweater campaign is hilarious to me…

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer|SFW




90s Model Comeback for Balmain of the Day


I was masturbating in the 90s, meaning I wasn’t born in the 90s, so I remember when these “supermodels” were the most aggressively marketed girls of the generation, they were household names, and not the only thing people were masturbating to, I mean there were the 90s Playboy chicks and the 90s Victoria’s Secret girls, and the 90s actresses and more obscure models and porn chicks…but these three – Claudia, Cindy and Naomi were the tall , fashion industry, probably the top paid, most glamourous and they were all capable of landing at least one billionaire, because that’s the kind of hooking they did…

Balmain decided to bring them all together, in some reunion tour, like the recently announced Spice Girl reunion tour, for old timers and the kids who are appropriating the 90s because it’s hip and ironic, and 50 year olds may never have looked this good, thanks to technology, but they are still 50 year olds…and that, even to a 45 year old…is repulsive, but probably not as repulsive as all the sex I’m sure they’ve had in those 50 years, mainly the early part of their career…18 year olds navigating the scene…and I guess that, along with everything else, makes these three together in a publicity stunt, still speak to that fetish…

Posted in:Cindy Crawford|Claudia Schiffer|Naomi Campbell|SFW




Claudia Schiffer is Hot at 100 of the Day

I remember guys I knew would circle jerk to Claudia Schiffer. This must have been in 1994. I never participated because I always just assumed a circle jerk was less about the sport of competitive jerking off to see who cums first and more about the leader of your gang being a closet case homo who just wants to watch all his friends jerk off….you know the kind of guy who invites his friends to fuck his girl because he just wants his friends there to watch his friends…

All this to say, Claudia Schiffer doesn’t bring up gay thoughts for me, she just reminds me of that story, because dudes fucking loved her enough to jerk off together to magazine pics of her and I don’t just mean David Copperfield…I mean so many fucking dudes..she was the Kate Upton of her era…and now, 20 or 30 years later…I am not good at math..but that are the equivalent of 100 years in model years…and she’s still fucking amazing…I guess some people just take care of themselves when their whole existence depends on their look…and I guess some people, especially have good genes thanks to ethnic cleansing that happened 30 years prior to her birth…

Here is her shoot for something random that doesn’t matter….because what matters is Claudia Schiffer

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer for Marie Claire UK of the Day

Claudia Schiffer may be in her 40s, but she was one of those supermodels in an era before instagram, when you actually needed to be chosen and needed to be professional on set, and needed to work fucking hard in order to make the millions…you know before one topless scene in a music video allowed your bird face to be the highest paid, biggest deal, since the fat one got too fat for Sample Size clothing….

She represents and era that’s long gone, when the media fed us people and we had no choice to collectively decide if they were good or not, and for some reason that represents a simpler time, because the masses and general public shouldn’t be responsible for deciding anything, because they are fucking idiots – proven by everything that is popular now…

At least when the industry chooses their hits, things like Claudia Schiffer happen….

Here she is revisiting modelling in Marie Claire UK…hiding her old face but still lovely enough for me, even knowing David Copperfield’s best illusion was making his dick disappear inside her….

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer Guess 30th Anniversary Photoshoot of the Day

Claudia Schiffer is still hot at 40….but for some reason I have trouble saying that…even though I am in my 40s…

It is like it goes against everything in my being….the core of who I am…my soul….my morals and values or lack of morals and values….and to admit an above 40 year old is still hot pussy…is like a fucking sin to my religion tha I’m drafting when not too busy masturbating to girls on Facebook…

The craziest thing about it is that more and more often than not, I’m seeing 40 or even 50 year old women that are fucking hot….that I want to actually fuck and not just in an I’m drunk, they are bored, recently divorced, unable to get pregnant, very experienced in bed…..and willing to fuck me kind of way….

Either they are getting hotter, staying hotter longer thanks to modern science, or this is what happens when you are old…..you settle…especially when your fat wife is disgusting to look at….

I don’t know how or why I think these older bitches are hot like I think 20 year old pussy is hot….but I guess I’m maturing into a seasoned pervert that appreciates all pussy ….more than just being willing to fuck all pussy….

But then again, this is Claudia Schiffer, it is a pro ad campaign for Guess? 30 years…..she is a model….shee was never disgusting or bottom feeding like i used to think 98 percent of moms in their 40s were…she’s kinda in a different league at all ages.

I’m so accepting of old pussy. I’m a hero who breaks down boundaries…

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiiffer Revisits Modeling of the Day

After posting a January Jones pregnancy picture, I have no choice but to reflect on her baby daddy who was rumored to be Claudia Schiffer’s husband, forcing me to compare her dumpy shit, with Schiffer’s latest photoshoot for Vogue because as you can imagine, Claudia Sciffer is fucking hot and has been for at least 2 decades, while January Jones fucking sucks….even though I’m drawn to broken homes….Claudia Schiffer’s dysfunctional home is highly more erotic but harder to break into…here are the pics…

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer Supports Her Philandering Husband of the DAy

I respect any woman, especially a hot old supermodel woman, who stands by her man in a time of bad publicity. People say he knocked up January Jones while filming a moive as Schiffer picked up the kids from school, yet she realizes, even if he did, who really cares…

Marriage is not supposed to be a prison. This is real life and we like to fucking stick our dicks in other things, as wives like to stick tennis pro dick in their pussies…It’s nature’s way…

Marriage is supposed to be that friendship, that level of communication, laid back and a tax break or in my case a way to pay my rent, food and drinking cuz she’s fat and has few options.

Does him cumming in a Hollywood bitch, who is younger, fatter, and less successful than Schiffer worth throwing that dynamic away…Apparently not…making Schiffer the perfect woman…

Unless of course he didn’t knock the bitch up and that was just press for the movies, in which case, who fucking cares how strong their marriage is, or how cool Schiffer is about his penis galivanting around town, cuz it makes this post too romantic, when I’m really more about gaping pussy and naked titties…

Too late now, I’m gonna run with this….

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer is the Hot Bitch Who Got Cheated On of the Day

Funny story came out today that Claudia Schiffer’s husband was fucking January Jones raw dog and knocking her up only to discover too late that January Jones wanted a baby and doesn’t believe in abortions, while Claudia Sciffer was at home picking up her kid from school everyday as he pretended he was just “working” on a movie with her….January Jones over Claudia Schiffer, I guess this proves the whole even fucking Claudia Schiffer gets boring for her husband argument people used to use in the 90s.

What it comes down to is that models are supposed to marry older billionaire business men who want the trophy to feel accomplished, they aren’t supposed to mess with people in Hollywood.

What is also comes down to is that dudes like to fuck and we aren’t that picky, and don’t really care if the bitch we are getting with is hotter than the one we have at home, we just like that we are getting it…

Either way, here she is with her hot mom ex supermodel body in England, the calm before the scandal storm…and she’s looking hot to me…if she needs a dick to cry on, I volunteer mine mainly because like Patch Adams, it brings laughs and joy to those trying to find it in the scavanger hunt that is my sex life.

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer’s Hot Old Model Legs of the Day

More women should age like this. I find it refreshing to see a 50 year old who has maintained her sex appeal and who looks long, thin and elegant as she walks her long, thing and elegant vagina around in mom jeans. Look in the mirror, or look at your wife then look at these pictures now ask yourself where did you go wrong?

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer Retired Model of the Day

Here are some long model legs for those of you still stuck in 1993 remembering David Copperfield’s best trick.

I have a feeling I’ve used that joke before.

I have limited capacity when it comes to humor…

I also have limited capacity for keeping it in my pants when I see pictures of how retired models age…I don’t know why, but it’s just porn to me. Maybe it is their superior genetics, or the comedy of seeing them struggle with aging, knowing their self-worth relies so much on their appearance, and really who fucking cares why I like anything, just look at these skinny legs.

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer’s Asian Umbrella Holder of the Day

Fany pants! You know you’ve made it when you can take a little Asian man away from his convenience store/sweatshop/computer programming, to work as your personal umbrella holder, cuz everyone with money knows holding your umbrella is ungodly, uncomfortable, and almost embarrassing, you know for common folk, and anyone who’s anyone has a poor immigrant do it, to strip him of all dignity he once had out of him…

Here’s ex-model/David Copperfield Trick, Claudia Schiffer showing us how the other side lives….This must be what Rihanna was singing about…Now I get it….

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer in the Same Outfit Two Days in a Row of the Day

Either Claudia Schiffer is endorsing whoever made this outfit for her, or she’s taken the Sarah Jessica Parker class on getting the paparazzi to not bother with you because you wore the same outfit two days in a row (don’t ask me why I know that, trust me it is not cuz I am the president of the SJP fan club) even though wearing the same outfit two days in a row would be red flags to me if I was a paparazzi…I’d think maybe she’s broke and only can afford one outfit, like the hookers I frequent…or maybe she slept at some dude’s house and is pulling the walk of shame…something I am sure you’ve all seen and wished you experienced…unless you’re a girl, in which case you really grasp why it is called the walk of shame…and really who fucking cares about Claudia Schiffer, she’s a retired model, two words that when put together in a sentence don’t make me want to masturbate.

November 3

November 4

What a dirtbag…

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer




Claudia Schiffer Naked on the Cover of Vogue of the Day

Some dudes like to jerk off to pregnant chicks getting slammed. I don’t know if it has to do with them getting off to something that they will probably never experience because girls don’t want to get pregnant by them or have them inside them while pregnant, or maybe it is on some other level that involves a bitch not being able to get pregnant if she’s already pregnant, or maybe it is the fact that there is a living creature inside them, or it could be that they’re fucking pregnant and about to bring life into the world to raise and nurture, but here they are in video getting fucked, which just makes the bitch a total fucking whore, like the most desperate a bitch can possibly get in a “come on, just go to lamaze class and get off the porn / stripper circuit”…I am not one of those dudes…

But I guess seeing Claudia Schiffer naked for fashion while pregnant takes naked pregnancy to the next level, because it’s not the fat black stripper on welfare and meth, but a model who I went through my 20s wanting to fuck like I was David Copperfield pulling his best illusion……

She did the cover of Vogue naked and pregnant the way I may not like it, but you probably do.

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer|Naked




Claudia Schiffer for the Retired Supermodel Pregnancy Fetishists of the Day

Some people have specific needs when it comes to jerking off and getting off. I realized a long time ago that pretty much anything you can think of, no matter how vile, at least one person has got off to it. I like to credit my friend who got off to garbage, because he found the story behind the garbage exhilerating and erotic. The mystery of who the person behind the empty coke can, or the half eaten sandwich, or the dirty kleenex was enough for him to get off….motherfucker would walk around with a garbage bag and gather during the day thanks to umemployment, welfare and insanity, then he’d spread it around his apartment floor and roll around in the shit naked and moaning….so I guess the idea that a percentage of people who used to masturbate to Claudia Schiffer when she was the supermodel who wouldn’t get naked who are also into ready-to-drop porn, that there is a market for and exists, is not that far of a stretch and here are the pictures for that guy.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer|Ready to Drop




Retired Supermodels Nude for i-D of the Day

Claudia Schiffer, Eva Herzigova and Helena Christensen are retired supermodels bringing their hot older bodies out of motherhood, to show the world why they were models in the first place and that when once a model always a model because models never die and good genes last forever or some other comic book mantra you’d be better off writing for me, since I don’t do comics.

They look good, but the pics are a little boring, maybe it’s just me but when a bitch gets this close to showing me her pussy but backs the fuck out, I get angry …real angry….and that kind of behavior gets a bitch raped or at least a black eye….if you know what I mean….

This is one of those photoshoots I would have liked to be masturbating in the corner on, cuz you know between shots, bald mom pussy was bountiful…

Either way, here are the pics…..take it in cuz I figure eventually they will age and start falling apart at the seams, but no matter what they put themselves thru, they still look pretty solid, but then again, maybe that’s why they aren’t showing their pussies…you know with all the dick and babies and losing of elasticity and shit….

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer|Eva Herzigova|Helena Christensen|Nude|Retired Models