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Archive for the Dead Category

2010

06

Jan

Casey Johnson With The Dead Heiress Titty Picture of the Day

They reported that Casey Johnson died on the 29th of December, so I doubt any necrophiliac’s are still lusting over her, cuz I’m sure she’s not quite a pretty sight, but the good news is that there are always pictures of her for you to get off to cuz I know first hand that there’s something magica about getting off to dead chicks, it’s like the ultimate disrespect, something far worse than convincing them to let you shit on their chest back when they were still alive, maybe it’s cuz there’s a possiblity that her spirit is watching you doin’ it and that’s why I jerk off to pictures of bitches in their bikinis from the 1950s assumin they are dead by now or to videos starring girls in this video…..

It’s one of those so wrong it’s right kind of thing…..

On a sidenote, I’ve feel like I have a special bond with Casey Johnson because I’ve been using their Bandaids on my dick sick I first got scabs…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Casey Johnson|Dead

2009

03

Nov

Lady Gaga Kils a Paparazzi of the Day

I want to know who the fuck is paying off everyone for Lady Gaga’s career.

Last night she awarded for her contribution to style in New York. I realize that decision makers don’t always know what’s u and a lot of politics and money go into making these choices and I get that it is easy for idiots to get confused by what Lady Gaga does, thinking it may be fashionable, when really it is fucking ridiculous and circus shit and I understand that Lady Gaga is all the fucking rage today, so if you have an award to give, givingit to her is good marketing because the second she shows to your event, people will know you exist or some shit….but am I the only one who is bored of this bitch. Doesn’t anyone else see through her bullshit, can’t they see she’s a joke and a machine fabricated by a record company to cater to the gay market? Do people really think this is authentic and not contrived? It just doesn’t make sense to me. She is not talented or fashionable, she is just a stain on pop culture….at least she covers her disgusting face….

The craziest thing in all this is that when Gaga showed up to the event, one of the paparazzi fell off a ladder and died. Seriously. That’s just how poisonous this cunt is and the real tragedy in all this is not that a dude died because of Lady Gaga, something I am sure wasn’t on his top 10 list of ways to die, but that it wasn’t her who died because she is the fucking devil and needs to be stopped….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Dead|Lady Gaga|Paparazzi

2009

05

May

RIP Motherfucker the Dom DeLuise Edition of the Day

I just heard this now, because I don’t have my finger on the pulse of pop culture, but I do sometimes get lucky enough to have my finger inside pop culture, and by pop culture I mean unsuspecting college girls who had a little too much too drink and happen to fall asleep while I am on the couch next time them, and by sometimes, I mean never.

But Dom DeLuise died in his sleep at 6 pm. He was 75. He had a good life. He was fat. He probably would have lived another 10 years if he ate a little less, exercised a little more, advice I don’t give my wife, because she’s seen her prime and I feel it’s time for her to say goodbye to this mean world.

Either way, here’s some youtube videos of him, to remind you who he is, in the event you forgot.

Here he is on Dean Martin’s Show….

Here he is with Dean Martin Again

Here he is as Pizze The Hut in Spanish

Here he is with Dom DeLuise on Johnny Carson’s Show…

Posted in:Dead|Dom DeLuise|RIP Motherfucker

2009

13

Apr

RIP Motherfucker the Marilyn Chambers Edition of the Day?

Another drug addicted retired/weathered pornstar dies in her mobile home….

SANTA CLARITA, Calif. Marilyn Chambers, star of such golden age classics as Behind the Green Door and Insatiable, was found dead Sunday in the mobile home where she had been living for the past several months. She was 57. Chambers was found by her daughter, McKenna. No cause of death is yet known, and an autopsy will be performed. ?

I am not going to lie, I had no idea who Marilyn Chambers was earlier today. But after lookin her up, the real surprise is that she didn’t die sooner than this, you know 70s pornstars who hung with John Holmes were all drug addicted HIV positive runaways.

Here are some quick facts on her:

One of her claim to fame was that she was one of the few actresses that could fully deepthroat John Holmes’ penis.

She was one of the first female stars to shave her bush.

She was noted for her enthusiastic performances of deep throat, anal, lesbian, interracial, extreme bukkake, and double or triple penetration scenes.

She was also the Ivory Snow model before Ivory Snow found out she did some legendary porn called Behind the Green Door that I’ve never seen.

She was also a Disco recording artist like she was in Boogie Nights…and here’s her song Benihana that I’d like to dedicate to Steve Aoki and suggest he Remix since his dad was Benihana.

RIP Motherfucker….you had a good run….you made many men cum…and now you will make many guys who get off to dead chicks cum…your legacy lives on….


BONUS – You can download Behind the Green Door if you Follow This Link – But Be Warned – The Links May Be Dead – I Didn’t Test Them Out….
GO

Posted in:Dead|Marilyn Chambers

2009

02

Mar

Lindsay Lohan Death Watch of the Day

Despite looking like death, Lindsay Lohan is still alive, unfortunately, but the good news is that it probably won’t be for long. She’s in the UK doing her thing by going to synagogue and going on dinner dates with her lesbian lover, you know doing her girlfriend duties that don’t involve suckin Ronson’s clit, and both this girls look like fucking shit. I figure they’ve gone back to Ronson’s home to say their final goodbyes to their family and friends at one last bash before taking their own lives, but I could be wrong. I usually am.

On a sidenote, when wasted, I met a 16 year old girl in the bar I was drinking at and she was really into Lindsay Lohan, so I did what any perverted 40 year old would do when a 15 year old girl is in love with Lindsay Lohan, and made her flash me her vagina for her phone number. I am not sure how long it’ll take her to realize I gave her the wrong number because last thing I need is Lohan suing me for giving her number out, but I got to see 16 year old vagina. I figure as long as it goes down in a bar, where you legally have to be 18 to drink, it’s safe.

Wow, my posts are sucking today….

Here they are at a Bar Mitzvah becauase Ronson is Jewish, Lohan is Converting, because they know they are both dying and that in Judaism there is no hell…which makes being a sinner, addict and cunt….

Posted in:Dead|death|Dying|Lindsay Lohan

2009

02

Jan

RIP Motherfucker the Jett Travolta Edition of the Day

John Travolta has a 16 year old son who has been reported to have autism and some Kawasaki Syndrome that fucks up his heart and makes him ride motorcycles, that brings on seizures and it turns out that he had one in the Bahamas where the family was celebrating New Years and may or may not have hit his head on the bath tub he may or may not have been masturbating in and died.

I was 16 once and the majority of it was spent masturbating so don’t get mad at me for fuckin’ up the facts. I know that I blame scientology but I mean that’s just obvious and the whole thing is a pretty shitty thing to have happen especially when ringing in a New Year, but if Travolta followed his heart and lived the gay life he was destined for, instead of this closet-case shit, none of this would have happened.

But that doesn’t stop the hurt he’s feeling from this premature loss, so RIP motherfucker. My heart goes out to Kelly Preston in these very sad times because I used to find her hot before she was polluted, and I am sure many sad years are ahead of her, unless of course this was a scientology sacrifice that was planned, in which case, you should go to jail. Let’s hope justice is served.

Posted in:Dead|Jett Travolta|RIP Motherfucker

2008

06

Dec

Bettie Page Is Gonna Die….of the Day

Rockabilly Pin-up Alternative Model Fat Chicks are probably not getitng out of bed today, mourning the soon to be loss of their idol, the God of their movement, the girl who inspired them to wear Corets, Vintage Lingerie and cut their bangs short and stupid, the one and only Bettie Page, who up until today, I thought was already dead, is about to die.

I am kinda upset that she is still alive and that I was wrong in thinking that she was already dead because a few years ago, I went through a phase where I’d only jerk off to nude pics of dead chicks, because some crazy part of me thought their spirit would be watching and that I wouldn’t be jerking off alone. I spent a solid 2 months on this kick and occassionally was jerking off to what I thought was a Betty Page’s dead pussy when it was in it’s 1950s prime, when I was really jerking off to some alive and well grandmother’s not quite dead pussy when it was in it’s prime and her spirit wasn’t in the room with me, but in some retirement community playing shuffle board. I feel like the 3 orgasms I’ve had over this bitch, thinking I was being all naughty with her and shit, were lies and I can’t get them back.

I hate you Bettie Page for robbing me of those orgasms, you were dead to me long ago, but here’s an R.I.P. motherfucker in advance.

I guess she deserves some thanks for being the leader of girls getting naked for money and without her being there willing to sacrifice her dignity for male attention and money, who knows what other slut of her time would have stepped in to lead the way. I guess we’d need Bill and Ted to figure that out and should appreciate her efforts to in innovating porn.

Here are some videos of her hot 1950s tits and remember you’ve always got Dita Von Teese’s shitty Betty Page Impersonation anytime you want to reconnect.

Here’s some Bettie Page Videos…..

To Read the Article on Bettie Page Dying….
GO

To See a Whole Lot of 1950s Pinup Grossness….
GO

Posted in:Bettie Page|Dead|Dying|RIP Motherfucker

2008

24

Oct

RIP MOTHERFUCKER the Jennifer Hudson Edition of the Day

Jennifer Hudson didn’t die, her mother and her brother did. They were found shot to death in what police think is a domestic dispute. I can only assume Jennifer Hudson is destroyed by this and it probably wouldn’t be right to crack any black people die in the ghetto jokes, especially considering these black folk are rich.

According to the Chicago Tribune, a 7-year-old boy named Julian King is missing. Police would not say whether he is a relative of the actress. They are also looking for a white 1994 Chevrolet Suburban with Illinois license plate No. X584859 or a teal Chrysler Concorde four-door with the left front headlight hanging down

A 1994? This girl’s won an Oscar and has hit songs, couldn’t they get a newer car? But I guess that’s not really a major concern, considering her family was just murdered…and she is now an orphan.

So i if you see those cars, call the police….not that anyone who reads this site leaves their house, but I just felt it was my duty to throw it out there…

RIP motherfuckers, it’s a sad day for my Dreamgirl and there’s nothing funny about this kind of thing, this will destroy her, let’s hope her faith gets her through this, because she is really big on God, and I assume, she feels like God has let her down, and that usually leads to some major self destruction and/or suicide because her life is pretty much over and she will need lots of therapy to get through this, so let’s hope she survives.

On a side note, police are looking for William Barfour, Balfour listed Hudson’s mother’s address as a place of residence within the last year. According to the Illinois Department of Corrections website, Balfour is currently on parole after serving jail time for attempted murder.

Note to self, don’t let an attempted murderer move into my home, because it may end in murder.

This is a crazy story, a sad story and I hope they get the fucker and give him the death sentence, only instead of lethal injection or the chair, they have Hudson smother him with her big ol’ tits, cuz used the wrong way, those things are lethal…and if they do, let’s hope they videotape it because it may revolutionize porn.

Posted in:Dead|Jennifer Hudson|Mother|RIP Motherfucker

2008

27

Sep

RIP Motherfucker the Paul Newman’s Own Edition of the Day

Along with Salad Dressing, Pasta Sauce, Microwave Popcorn and Chocolate Chip Cookes, Paul Newman can add Obituary to his list of things that are his….

It is the end of an era. Paul Newman died yesterday at 83 from a battle with lung cancer. I just wanted to say his over-priced dressings will not be the same without him around to see the sales reports. This man was Cool Hand Luke and Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, a seriously great contribution to American movies, and someone who tried to use his name to make a difference in the lives of sick kids and it’s sad to see him go.

I mean you can’t be all that sad consdering dude is 83, and that’s a pretty long life, one longer than any of us will probably live, but you should take a minute to recognize all that he’s done in his lifetime, and to realize that it is a whole lot more than you ever did.

So tonight when getting drunk and smoking cigarettes, the same cigarettes that killed Paul Newman, spill a little drink on the sidewalk for your fallen homie..I’m talking about you Newman.

It’d be nice if I woke up today to write my RIP Motherfucker to the cast of The Hills, but instead I have to do this. Maybe Paul Newman’s final legacy will be teaching the cast of The Hills how to land a terminal illness, I guess only time will tell.

In the next few years, a lot of these Hollywood Old Timers are going to start droppin’ like flies, I’m talking about Regis, Barbara Walters and a whole lot more, so get ready for a lot more of these…which is exciting, because they are so fun to write while hung the fuck over feeling like death myself. Yay!

To Read More on It
GO

Posted in:Dead|Paul Newman

2008

25

Sep

Naked Man Gets Killed By Cops of the Day

Here’s a video of someone who is better off than me today. Watch it.

Posted in:Dead|Naked Man

2008

01

Jul

RIP MOTHERFUCKER the Ruslana Korshunova Edition

So this may be old news, Supermodel Ruslana Korshunova killed herself by jumping off the 9th floor of her Manhatten apartment yesterday afternoon. They say that it could have something to do with the Russian mob because they are fucking crazy, but it is most likely a suicide from a broken heart. Every Russian that I have ever met has always been a little off, I always blamed communism and the everyman is the working class, with rationed bread, poor living conditions, state issued clothes that everyone wore, like being raised in some kind of prison, but I never went to Russia and it was all speculation. They always seemed willing to hurt other people, but never themselves.

Now I don’t know this chick, but she was fucking successful and maybe she was taken away from her family too young, or maybe she couldn’t adapt to going from a life in hell and poverty to a life of Glizt and Glamor, while all she really anted was her her mother’s home cooked Borshch, but put up with the day to day shit of being a model to not let her family who she was sending her money back home to. Maybe it was drugs or too much pressure on herself or maybe it was a broken heart. But Russians are known to strong and to have no emotions are are too busy getting the job done, training for olympic sports, modeling or doing eveything in their power to get the fuck out of Russia like becoming mail order brides and you’d think that Ruslana was living the dream, but I guess sometimes the only way to stop the demons in your head or your unhappiness is off yourself. Suicide is for pussies, and it’s pretty fuckin’ sad especially when it’s a a beautiful successful girl who had her life ahead of her, and the cast of The Hills or some fat chick who is sad because no one really cares about, because the world has enough fat chicks and can do with one less.

Either way, I feel like I have lost one of my own, not because I am a model, but because I like to masturbate to picture of models. Ruslana Korhunova, RIP Motherfucker.

Geraldo stayed classy by airing footage of her dead body because dude will do anything to get people watching his shit:

Posted in:Dead|RIP Motherfucker|Ruslana Korshunova

2008

01

Jul

Mental Patient Died in an Psych Ward due to Negligence of the Day

As the most incompetent person at everything I set my mind out to do, I can say that I have never been directly responsible for someone’s death in my incompetent ways. Truth is that I didn’t really have a job that would really put anyone’s life at risk, I mean other than being a Valet at a shitty hotel for about 3 days, before getting fired for being too slow, but other than that the only life at any risk was my own for operating machinery when completely wasted on the job or falling asleep, not showing up, and pretty much sucking at everything I put my mind out to do.

I saw this video of a mental ward waiting room and it pretty much blew me away, because 2 security guards, a doctor and a nurse all walked in and out on a dying bitch and did nothing about it because I guess they aren’t paid enough to actually give a shit. I was always under the impression that being in a hospital was the best place to be in the event something went wrong. I would remember I’d get severe panic attacks when in hospitals visiting dying friends because disease scares me and was confident they’d defibrillate or jack my lifeless body up with meds in the event that I was to go down, but then again, I don’t live in the US where poor people are prisoners to a flawed system designed for the rich. That is probably the reason why Magic Johnson is still alive with HIV and every whore I know from the 90s in New York that I used to spend time with and who got the germ are dead. That’s pretty much why I am up in Canada, not because I like it here but because it works for ghetto folk like myself.

Posted in:Dead|Mental Patient

2008

24

Jun

Alyssa Milano Hot Naked Video The Way We Like Her…of the Day

Here’s a video of Alyssa Milano Naked in some recent movie called Pathology. Her nude scene is her dead and getting cut open in some sort of autopsy and it’s pretty fucking sick but you can still see pussy. I assume that some of you are fucked up enough to find this hot as you spent most of your childhood killing your neighborhood cats and other random animals that would cross paths with you and you haven’t quite moved onto bigger things yet, because you aren’t that much of a psycho and you just leave the psychotic thoughts for your masturbation.

I was talking to my friend the other day and he told me about how he plays a game called “Would You” with his friends. It’s basically where different scenarios are laid out and you decide whether you’d d fuck the chick or not. One of the weirder ones was if you’re driving down an old dirt road in the middle of nowhere and you come across a passed out 18 year old hot girl in a mini skirt is lying on the side road like she had been hit by a car or something and you pull over to help her, do you bang her or do you call or help or do you bang her then call for help. I guess fucking a passed out chick is a lot less disgusting than fucking a dead chick, most of the chicks I’ve banged were passed out by by booze or drugs and not by getting hit by a car, so I wouldn’t do it and I’d get her help, but I bet you’re not as wholesome as me you horny fuckin’ creep.

Posted in:Alyssa Milano|Dead|Naked

2008

23

Jun

RIP Motherfucker, The George Carlin Edition of the Day

I don’t know much about George Carlin or his comedy but I do know people think he’s some kind of legend and I am sure it goes without saying that he is substantially funnier than me, at least he was until today because now he’s dead. RIP, Motherfucker.

Posted in:Dead|George Carlin

2008

23

Jan

Heath Ledger’s Body Being Taken Out of His Apartment of the Day

You’ve probably all heard the updates on this story. Ledger didn’t die of the AIDS he got on the set of Brokeback Mountain and he didn’t kill himself because he couldn’t live with himself for having had sex with Lohan or because of his ex Michelle Williams who got knocked up by him and locked him down by keeping the baby. He died by accidentally taking too many over the counter sleeping pills and it was rumored to have happened in Mary Kate Olsen’s New York apartment, but that was later proven to be a lie.

I don’t know why I am putting up the pictures of the body being taken out because it’s pretty fucking depressing to look at and almost as morbid as you can get, but let’s just hope dude staged this death like he was Elvis and is moving to that mystical island celebrities who “die” prematurely go to so that he can finally live his dream of producing a Biggy and Tupac album with Andy Kaufman or some shit.

Even though lots of people die before they turn 28, shit’s still too young and it’s too bad that Hollywood drags these kids through the mud forcing them to live these lives of drug and alcohol fueled excess, but we all know if any of us were in their situations, with their level of disposable income and free time, we probably would have died a long fucking time ago. That said, here’s one more Rest in Peace Mate.

That said, I don’t judge and know pretty much nothing about this dude, I just think the whole things too bad and to celebrate dude’s life, I am going go watch some Kangaroo mating videos, but between you and me, I was planning on doing that anyway.

Here are some pictures of Lohan wearing her black tights and showing how sad she is that her ex fling died by hanging out with some new cock…..I guess it’s one of those “to get over someone you get under someone else” situations…but then again getting under someone else is kinda Lohan’s life story…..Let’s expect this emotional time to be the excuse Lohan’s been waiting for to go back to the bottle because she’s already milked her parent’s divorce as much as she’s milked every cock she’s come across.

Update – Fine, I take it back, here’s Lohan sad on the phone since Ledger died or she’s on the phone with her agent and he just told her to act sad because it’s good for business or she just found out she spent all her money and can’t afford designer leggings or she just realized that all the herpes rumors are true or she just realized that she has a yeast infection and can’t fuck for a week or…I don’t fuckin’ know….she look sad.


Related Posts:

RIP Heath Ledger
Brokeback Mountain Is Not Gay

Posted in:Dead|Heath Ledger|Unsorted