If only all Cuban prostitutes looked this good….I’d be on the next flight to the breadlines of the communist island…with rolls of quarters in pocket…ready to make my dick’s dreams come true…..it’s never too late…

That’s not to say that she’s a Cuban prostitute, but she’s cuban and in her underwear on the internet, she’s just from a better socio-economic background, benefitting from her dad being Human Trafficked to America, where he was able to do steroids and climb the ranks of the Oakland As, making big enough money to allow his daughter to get naked on the internet for fun, not for money to buy her baby formula on the black market, or designer purses.

Which is what makes Josie so great, along with a hot body, hot face, that willingness to show it off for no reason other than showing it off, speaks to my soul not that I have a soul, I’m words on a screen people, but if I did have a soul, this rich kid would speak to it.

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Posted in:Elsa Hosk

Elsa Hosk is a nice reminder that hot lingerie models still exist. They aren’t all dopey assed instagram bodied, Kardashian pig looking bitches, and even after having a kid, she’s managed to tape her cunt to her upper thigh, so no one even realizes that shit’s been blown out MILF style….

It’s like why can this Swedish athletic basketball playing bitch look so good at 30 years old after shitting out a kid, while other bitches just throw in the fucking towl.

This is the competitive spirit we need, going head to head against the impending rot most women experience in their lifetime, and I say most because some die before it happens.

Maybe it’s Sweden, you know they did to good with Ikea, is she the Ikea of women, probably not, since that shit breaks in 2 years, while this one is still at it making you want to meatball her, which I haven’t defined as a sex act yet, but I’m thinking it could be either putting the meat remnants of her vagina on your balls, or rolling them up into a set of balls, like the female to male trans do…..which doesn’t seem like a hot thing, but I only know so much about Sweden…Ikea and Meatballs…that’s about it.

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Elsa Hosk and a bunch of models who aren’t as hot as Elsa Hosk…because as far as I’m concerned, Elsa Hosk is the best thing to come out of the Victoria’s Secret human trafficking ring, you know just importing those models from various countries for dudes of the world to jerk off to them, and women of the world to buy the panties they are paid a lot of money to wear, in hopes dudes will jerk off to them too…it’s a business model….

Not that Elsa is still with that basic, mall brand, bullshit, but they basically made her, probably own her, and she’s definitely branded by their ranch.

She went to the Elvis premiere, which seems like a dog shit, over the top, Gay Elvis fantasy of a movie from the trailer, but they paid for models to be at the premiere, so I like their marketing.

I am an Elvis fan, he’s a fucking legend, so seeing him all gay is weird, I can’t trick my brain into thinking Vanessa Hudgens’ ex is Elvis, but you know, it’s Baz and that’s just what he does with things….and who cares about the Elvis movie, when I’m here for the hot model tits.

And some pics:

To See the Rest of the Pics from Cannes featuring a whole bunch of sluts CLICK HERE

Posted in:Elsa Hosk

I just did a post on on how the MILFS I see on the regular aren’t actually MILFS but rather MIAWTFBTAA….Mom’s I am Willing to Fuck Because They Are Around….

You know, when you have no standards you capitalize on ANY girl willing to fuck you, if she’s willing to fuck you, in that brief moment in time, with that brief window of opportunity….take what you can get….and having a kid and a wrecked body is usually increasing your chances because they hate themselves as much as you hate their gross battle wounds from pregnancy and giving up….

Some moms, like Elsa Hosk, who would never be willing to fuck you, because they have an athlete’s approach to staying hot and winning, despite having a kid try to fuck them up, which they clearly don’t let fuck them up, because they aren’t like the MILFS I see on the regular who all look like they have 2 kids more than they actually have, you know REAL mom shit at walmart….that this mom puts to shame in a “You are lazy bitch, get it together”….I mean look at his shit

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Posted in:Elsa Hosk

Elsa Hosk is something else..a….hosk…..

Get it…

I mean, I buy into her origin story, some Swedish B-Ball player in a league you could obviously jack off to…and I’m sure many people did, why else would they be watching lady sports.

I am just surprised that Josephine Skriver, the other hot VS model is the only one made in a test tube with genetic modification thanks to her dad’s working in gene editing and making designer babies….because Elsa Hosk is the one who looks like she was created in my MIND yet here she is all cummed to life….BUT the real question is whether she’s real, I mean are you real? Am I real? Is the internet real……do I actually put lame ass jokes on a blog everyday like a teen girl with big dreams….I mean I like to think I’m in a Coma and this is just the delusions….MY WHOLE LIFE was manufactured in my mind…..

But I’ll go with real, because if you don’t know the difference of real or simulation, and I don’t….then it’s real enough to jerk off to

Elsa Hose..is something else.

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Cameron Hammond is a pretty successful photographer who travels around the world taking pictures of amazing models in amazing settings, you know, that whole bikini photoshoot thing is still lucrative despite every bitch taking bikini selfies all day.

We’ve been following his work lazily for many years now, he’s basically an instagram sensation, and any time his wife / manager is lovely when she has emailed us to take down the pictures we’ve posted under what we call “FAIR USE” since you’re here for my incredible colorful writing about terrible things and not for the pictures, but that the people who took the pictures call THEFT…of copyright.

Most people don’t see the value of having their work promoted on blogs, since blogs are an outdated technology no one gives a fuck about, and instead want to get paid, even though we don’t have money. They send lawyers letters and are pure cunts about it, where the Hammonds are like “these pics aren’t public yet, please take them down until they are public”…and that’s the winning attitude.

So today, I post his pictures of Elsa Hosk, who I think is the hottest bikini model out there, despite having blown out her cunt with a baby in recent months / years, she’s still fucking banging and as a stepfather, you’d think I’d be into MILFs, it’s par for the course but I’m a self hating stepfather disgusted by child birth, so when you make it through that horrible, seemingly alien and unnatural process, that I guess is so natural it feels fake, child birth….and come out the other end with an ass you want to reverse birth yourself into head first….it’s a fucking win.

This is a campaign for a bikini company, Elsa Hosk is fucking hot, and the photographer Cameron Hammond and his wife aren’t cunts. That’s the conclusion of this post.

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Posted in:Elsa Hosk

Elsa Hosk is doing some posing in her bikini and is looking pretty fucking good because she recently ripped her CERVIX apart for her baby, so that the baby would come out alive, which it did.

I don’t know if birthing, or ripped cervixes or would it be cervices are your thing, I would figure you’re more the kind of guy who doesn’t ever make contact with the cervix, for short dicks and lack of women letting you near their vaginas, but maybe when you vigorously masturbate you think about the porn chick you’re watching gt railed as “I’d destroy your cervix, if only I had enough money to hire you to do a porn shoot in my house, despite not having a penis long enough to make contact with your cervix, but maybe I could buy an extender”…you weird angry fuck.

I do know that birthing didn’t really stop her model and athlete muscle memory from happening, unless these are photoshopped, becasue she’s as good as she was and that makes no sense….but I’m sure she didn’t use a Ukrainian baby factory of surrogats that I read about in the news…and that she did infact give birth because out of all the VS models, she’s one I don’t think is a tranny trying to trick us as a trap or a pass.

Point of the story, Elsa Hosk is being expensive in her Ketchup and Mustard bikini, the hot dog bun you’d want to slide your hot dog in because she’s wonderful and that’s how we honor wonderful ladies. That and cum tributes. Which I still don’t understand but unfortunately know they happen.

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Posted in:Elsa Hosk

Elsa Hosk may have had some work done, all these near 30 year olds have face injections to look more like a muppet on instagram….but she’s still looking hot to me.

One of the hottest models brought into the Victoria’s Secret empire after a career as a female pro Basketball Player, the Michael Jordan of female basketball in Sweden, because she brought in the fans, who could jerk off to the games the way women’s sports were originally designed before letting in the people who excelled at the sport….

I don’t know about you, but I’m not watching women’s sports for the feats in athleticism that high school boys can probably pull off….you know, girls vs guys in sport….just ask that Trans Swimmer who is making a joke of sports while trolling as a girl swimmer destroying titles designed for women because woke went too far….

I am watching female sports for masturbation purposes….

Not that Elsa still does that whole sports thing, it’s her bullshit origin story that sounds better than “Fucked agents, bookers, or cockteased, them, but got in to replace Candice Swanepoel when she was breeding and did it better”….until deciding to breed herself.

So this is her MILF Mom bod, one that’s substantial and worth celebrating in its underwear, looking better than most bitches who don’t have kids, probably the muscle memory or a little vanity and effort, either way, it works!

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Posted in:Elsa Hosk

Elsa Hosk is a YUMMY MOMMY….rocking a fit fucking body thanks to being a SWEDISH basketball star before deciding “that’s boring, I can strip down for top brands and make millions doing it”….she was one of the hottest VS girls prior to her whole birthing process you’d probably jerk off to …READY TO DROP PORN is something special to lonely people….

This ties right into my MILF POST that I basically just posted…saying MILFS today aren’t MILFS I’d consider MILFS….because too many hotties have pieces of shit children as props….almost making the whole MILF thing less impressive than it once was when ALL moms were blown out, fat, pigs who looked exhausted…and ready to die because they’ve thrown in the towel…

Where this rich fuck’s pussy probably healed, and is just still hot bodied and frolicking in the ocean with not a care in the world…the kid’s probably with her nanny..

It’s definitely a mind fuck, but it’s a mind fuck you can jerk off to, making it more tolerable..

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Posted in:Elsa Hosk