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Archive for the Events Category

2014

12

Sep

Reviewing the Russell James Book Launch I Wasn’t Invited to of the Day

Victoria’s Secret put out a book for Russell James, their senior photographer, who I guess has been shooting with them for a very very long time, and has got rich and a lot of fucking sex from babes who want to be Victoria’s Secret models, which happens to be every girl in existence…called ANGELS ….featuring their Angels, and now Kendall Jenner, because I guess she’s bought her way into Victoria’s Secret modelling…

The launch was last night, I wasn’t invited, obviously, but Getty Images was, so here’s my run down of what you missed…

Russell with Branson, because creeper billionaires with private islands like photographers who bring top models there…

Russell with Lima, because there is a bond created when a girl gets half naked and bossed around by a dude with a camera…that involves being allowed to pick her up / cum on her face whenever he wants

Adriana Lima Kissing A Picture of Herself, Something I am sure she does often and everytime she sees a mirror – it’s all part of being an ego

Russell and Sara Sampaio

Three Victoria’s Secret Models…I think Lima is making this event about her…

Russell and Karolina Kurkova

Russell with Kendall Jenner because she pays him to be her photographer

Kendall Jenner with Branson – because her mom taught her how to sniff out money

Candice wasn’t bad….

But Martha Hunt was the best thing there…

Even when Lima was out trying to steal the spotlight…

Josephine Skriver is good too…

So is Elsa Hosk…

Why wasn’t I invited to this again? Oh right, because Lily Aldridge has hated me since she was an LA groupie doing TAMPON commercials

Posted in:Events|Russell James

2014

11

Aug

Top 13 at the Teen Choice Awards Happend of the Day

The Teen Choice Awards happened last night – and I watched them. Not because I like teens, in fact it was actually the total opposite of that. I just wanted to see what the kids were into these days, and as expected, it was filled what must be brain washed from the media, really silly, not even good looking, young stars who all kind of looked the same, acted the same, and reminded me that we’re all fucking doomed…

Here’s the top 10 people I noticed there…but barely cared because I didn’t find any one of them hot…compelling or exciting. The industry has gone to shit, and I’m not just saying that as a jaded asshole. It’s just a bunch of fucking cheesy, uninteresting people and Shailene Wood-whatever the fuck her name is talking about cancer patients because she did a movie on cancer and now she’s in tune. Fuck off. Phoney.


TO SEE ALL THE PICS COMPILED BY THE ILLUSTRIOUS MADAMMEOW
CLICK HERE

1- Chloe Grace Moretz because you’re all perverts and loved her in Kickass

2- Jordin Sparks because she has Horrible Cleavage…and you love horrible cleavage on even the most irrelevant American Idol trash

3- McKaley Miller Cleavage because I’ve never heard of her, but her cleavage screams “I may end up in porn”

4- Bella Thorne because we always need a good fire crotch in Hollywood to balance things out, especially one that is becoming more and more famous due to limited options, who has a slutty naked hipster sister.

5- Cher Lloyd because she survived Demi Lovato’s ass rape…to be famous…and I respect any whore willing to whore to follow her dreams…

6- Sarah Hyland was the host, totally uninteresting, or funny, but I guess that’s what happens when you’re a fucking robot.

7- Lea Michele because she’s trying to be hot, and she’s so not hot, but no one is telling her, everyone around her sucks up. So here she is making a fool of herself and has no idea of it. Always a good time.

8- Hailey Baldwin because she’s doing the Baldwin Genes alright – thanks to an injection of Brazilian model daddy Steven Baldwin stuffed…She’s the Baldwin Ireland wishes she was…

9- Ariana Grande Leads With her Chin…because her speech on never taking no for an answer, because she’s never heard no, she’s a vapid spoiled cunt with an ego of a mother was as inspiring as her gay as fuck brother coming out on Big Brother…

10- Kendall Jenner was there with her big dumb ass sister because they won

11- Taylor Swift is Good and Skinny because she’s hanging with models, possibly lesbian with models, all those boys she went through has left her realizing that getting eaten out is where the orgasm comes from…so stick with a chick – it comes without all the headaches of being cheated on….

12- Shay Mitchell because she’s relevant on a Relevant show and probably the best looking of the bunch….

13- Haley Joel Osment in Drag – because being the cute kid growing up fucks you up when you hit puberty – which coincidentally is the time when any girl becomes cute – thanks to tits and dudes being perverts – she he did what needed to be done.


TO SEE ALL THE PICS COMPILED BY THE ILLUSTRIOUS MADAMMEOW
CLICK HERE

Posted in:Events

2014

21

Jul

Jenner Sister in Fuck Me Boots for a Celebrity Charity Put On by a Woman Beater of the Day


I think the title says all you need it to…Here’s the video of Chris Brown performing for his stupid Charity to make good because you can’t base a man’s personality on his willingness to beat the fuck out of Rihanna…who I am sure is high maintenance, annoying and the kind of girl who has made many men crack…or even punched herself in the face and blaming said man because she’s that kind of diva…

Not to say beating girls is right…I think that shit is bad bad bad…I just think Rihanna’s pretty awful…maybe even a demon species of her own…

But still this Chris Brown asshole gets support from people…so I guess those celebs think beating girls is right..if there’s a photo opp in it…because no matter what charity Charles Manson puts on, you can be sure I won’t support…

MORE Pics via SPLASHNEWS

Posted in:Events

2014

17

Jul

Top 10 Tricks at the ESPY Awards of the Day

The ESPY awards happened last night. I can’t imagine anyone really giving a shit. I don’t know how much ESPN really matters, or more importantly, I don’t know how celebrating Athletes, who are already celebrated, really matters. I just know all the gold diggers, athlete fucking groupies, and possible athletes went out to the shit, I don’t know who 90 percent of the girls in attendance were, but here are the best tricks I found with my little to no actual research…

10 – Kim Johnson

9 – Draya Michele

8 – Hannah Cornett

7- Dara Torres is a Cripple Bitch

6 – Sydney Leroux

5- Erin Andrews – We Saw Your Staged Peeper Videos – To Advance Your Career – TRICK

4- Chrissy Teigen’s Career was Based on Gold Digging Brothers…Rappers or Athletes – Interchangeable..

3- Ali Fedotowsky….Dressed Like a Pumpkin…Brother’s Love Pumpkins…

2- Erin Andrews and Chrissy Teigen – Double Dose of TRICK

The Number 1 Trick at the ESPYS was Destinee Hooker – Because Her Name is So Appropriate

CLICK TO SEE PICS OF DANICA PATRICK AT THE ESPYS PRETENDING TO BE A RACECAR DRIVER

Click to see pics of JESSICA ALBA AT THE ESPYS PRETENDING TO BE INTO SPORTS

Click to see pics of CHRISSY TEIGEN BECAUSE SHE’S THE ENEMY AND YOU MUST ALWAYS KEEP TRACK OF THE ENEMY

Posted in:Events

2014

30

Jun

Top 10 Tits at the BET Awards BEEF of the Day

The BET Awards are all about controversy and scandal, because in case you didn’t know, the hip hop industry is like the WWF, this shit is staged to keep people interested and to think these millionaires are still hood and gangster, when all they really want to do is sit in their vacation home and read up on their investments…but the public wants them shooting, making it rain on hoes, partying and being ghetto…so that’s what they pretend to do…

I mean sure, some of these people are fucking ghetto, and happened to make it, but I think most are probably suburban, hard workers like Drake…they just talk like that for affect…

Either way, only one death that I know of happened at a BET affiliated event, which is good ratio…

and here are the top 10 tits having BEEF with random shit I invented at the event, starting with Juicy J VS a Trick up top, and Adrienne Bailon vs Wale down low…

Karruche Tran VS her Dress

Laura Govan VS Breast Impants and the Implants are winning

Zendaya VS Aalyiah

Brittany Daniels VS Being White

Faith Evans VS Subtlety

Naturi Naughton VS Oprah

Raven Goodwin VS Precious

Faith Evans VS Botox

Nadia Buari VS Beyonce

Claudia Jordan VS a Bra

Jennifer Hudson VS Weight Watchers

Ashley From Fresh Prince VS Scientology

Paris Hilton VS the World

Posted in:BET Awards|Events

2014

23

Jun

Drunkenstepfather EDC Exclusive of the Day

Unless you’re the DJ who pulled off the greatest scam in the history of life by becoming a DJ right around the time DJs started getting paid stupid fucking money thanks to EDM going mainstream and all the lame suburban college kids decided they were ravers….

Or unless you’re the DJ who pulled off the greatest scam in the history of life’s groupie girlfriend, who when I used to go to raves we’d call the “DJ HO” or “record bitch”…back when DJs used records…

Or unless you’re the sponsor, the VIP, or the dude making stupid money after organizing this event…

Music festivals seem like a fucking nightmare…and I wouldn’t be caught dead at them, no matter how hot everyday girls giving the party life one last shot before turning 30, coupled with half naked 20 year olds, are…

But I would convince my black friend to go take pics from drunkenstepfather, because half naked 20 year olds to 30 year olds raving..as stupid as it looks or sounds…are fun to stare at…

So here’s our EDC exclusive…shot on a point and shoot by a black man…probably dressed like a muppet…named kaveriis photos

Posted in:Events|Photos|stepEXCLUSIVE

2014

09

Jun

Emily Ratajkoski and the Guys Choice Awards Happened of the Day

Emily Ratajkoski brought her overrated bird face and big tits to the Guy’s Choice Awards, which are basically some bullshit marketing stunt to generate revenue for whoever the fuck puts them on, and that celebrate nonsense for no reason other than that the person was able to attend the event or more importantly, their tits get hits and having them part of their bullshit is good for business…and in Emrata’s case, any media coverage is good for her, since she’s faded into obscurity, her internet fame still in existent but hardly as relevant as she was this time last year…let’s hope she made millions so she can ride those 5 minutes for the rest of her life, or maybe we should hope she made nothing so that she turns to porn.

I don’t hate her or her fake everything, I just don’t think she’s a good person, but rather an entitled cunt who was given all her dreams and forgets people along the way, because cunts feel as though they deserve any and all fame they may get…

The whole thing is silly, but not as silly as the guy’s choice awards….as a concept and I’m sure as a show to watch on TV…a total waste of time…and remember watching anything called “guy choice” makes you a gay…


There were other hookers there…so TO SEE ALL THE GUY’S CHOICE AWARDS PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski|Events

2014

05

Jun

The CMT Country Music Award Tits of the Day

The Country Music awards happened last night and I would say that no one fucking cared, because everyone says they like “everything but country”….but the reality is that the average American is all about the shit, I mean they sing along like it was gospel and they even trick the producers of a singing show to recruit one of their own to make the show more successful….I mean this shit touches a slice of American pie I don’t want to eat…but Brooklyn Decker clearly does, because she made an appearance, not because she’s into country or a country music singer…but because she wants country music fanatics to jerk off to her…it is smart marketing, they are loyal people.

Kellie Pikler’s Titties her Grand Pappy Made her Buy with her American Idol Money to make their incest the best….was there

Brittany Kerr’s Got Big Country Titties Even Though I DOn’t Know Who she is but assume she’s a gold digger based on her hand…

LeAnn Rimes Lives…and her Jesus loving fans are forgiving and will never turn their back on their own, even if she’s become a heathen home wrecking hooker in Hollywood…she’s still their Christian sensation she was marketed as to them…because they can’t really see beyond what they are told…their brains don’t have that function.

Posted in:Events

2014

06

May

Met Gala Happened Last Night of the Day

I don’t believe in these pretentious, who’s who type events, I am more about getting drunk in the gutter, or spending money on things that don’t involve rich and famous people stroking each other’s egos…

Even if some freak accident happened and all of a sudden I became famous as fuck, I would never attend these things, they don’t have strippers, they are uptight and they seem like the worst possible event possible..shit is a nightmare…

But these bitches who think they matter because you think they mattered and Madam Meow was there to capture some of the best and worst of the very very very important night that is so not important in the grand scheme of the fucking world…especially in the grand scheme of your life…in fact I hate myself for posting these bitches all dolled up in hair and make-up showing tit like they are more interesting than they are…which isn’t interesting at all…but who take this shit seriously, I mean Kim Kardashian, pornographer and midget, even put on some panties you’d probably be scared of sniffing…

CLICK HERE

Lily Donaldson is a model and I like model bodies…

I don’t know who the fuck this twat is…but she was there…

Cara Delevigne and Rihanna

Hayden Panettiere’s Breast Implants are Good…

Olivia Munn’s Tits because She’s Reaching….

Johnny Depp and Amber Heard Being Theatrical

Maggie Gyllenhaal’s Sloppy Tits…

Emma Stone’s got a Weird Face….

Reese Witherspoon Fat Ass Looks Less Fat…

Rita Ora VS Rihanna because That’s Her Whole Purpose…

Beyonce Still Fakin’ It

Georgia May Jagger’s Good Times…

Nicole Richie is Creepy as Shit

Chrissy Tiegen’s Pug Face Pregnancy Belly….

Kate Upton Using Her Big Titties is Cuz That’s All She’s Got…

Here’s a Kate Upton Sports Illustrated Video…Really Annoying….

Here are the instagram pics…

Oh and most importantly, midget Kim Kardashian wore panties….


TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Events