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Archive for the Implants Category

2010

03

Jun

Amy Winehouse’s Fake Tits of the Day

I’ve always loved Amy Winehouse. I found her the hottest fucking pussy to hit the pop music scene. Not only did she sing like a black woman in the subway station I used to try to offer an extra dollar for a back alley blowjob to, but she also had serious fucking sex appeal. She always looked so fucking gutter all the fucking time….you know thanks to her drug addiction and lack of caring that left her skinny, dirty looking, toothless, unshowered and definitely something that smelled like piss, shit, cum and rotting flesh, that just felt like home to me…..but I think it had more to do with her being Jewish and my entire life I’ve had a Jewish girl fetish but they never really gave into my demands, I figured I’d be the source of their rebellion, you know the ultimate fuck you to their dad’s, but instead, they just ignore me and try to cross the street when I walk by, while Winehouse seemed like an accessible Jew, one who wouldn’t kick me out of her pussy if I was up inside her, even if it was in a rape situation, because that takes too much attention away from getting her next fix….I guess she’s just a package deal, and despite being so emaciated, she managed to keep her tits, mainly cuz they are fake tits now…but still give the affect of Fat tits on Skinny Body I’ve grown to love…

Here are the pics…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Amy Winehouse|Implants

2010

01

Jun

Kelly Rowland Implants in a Bikini of the Day

I wonder how much Kelly Rowland resents Beyonce for leaving her behind and running off with her own solo career, because Beyonce is an ego and didn’t like sharing the stage with the other girls. Sure, Kelly Rowland made a ton of money, doesn’t have to work ever again, but you know how people are, they always want what they don’t have, and don’t appreciate what they do have, so everytime Beyonce’s name comes up, her insides just cry, leaving her with little else to do but spend her time getting implants and walking around on the beach, hoping that a rapper will miraculously sweep her off her feet and give her work like she was Rihanna, but I think it’s safe to assume standing under the sun is the only shine this popstar will ever get again…and here are the pics…

Here she is in some one-piece….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Bikini|Implants|Kelly Rowland

2010

25

May

Kate Hudson’s Little Implants of the Day

I don’t know about this Kate Hudson implant bullshit. I mean it would make sense because she’s aging weird and tits are a great distraction from face and since she was always flat chested as fuck, implants were the only solution, but if she did get implants, they are probably the smallest fucking implants ever implanted in a bitch, you know implants from the cancer ward for girls who had their boobs amputated but wanted to come home with the same small bra size, not implants made to distract from a bitch’s face, I mean look at these pictuers, her arm is thicker than her tits and she’s wearing a bra, something no girls with implants do, so I’m going to say if she got implants it was a waste of money like the stripper I knew who got implants and died from an infection 3 days later before ever putting them to use…..and here she is filming one of her shitty movies…..

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Implants|Kate Hudson

2010

17

May

Playboy Playmate Jenna Bentley in a Bikini With her Client of the Day



Jenna Bentley is an irrelevant stupid lookin fake titty ex-playboy playmate who you’ve never heard of. She is apparently also a hooker…maybe not a street whore kind of hooker I appreciate, but the more subtle type of hooker who dates rich dudes in exchange for the good life, because they couldn’t get there on their own….

The reality is that being in Playboy is the equivalet to having a degree to fake titty sluts, it’s like having a built in retirement plan and guaranteed work, because rich dudes going through a midlife crisis (notice the long hair and tattoos), divorced or recently widowed cuz they are so old have usually done their share of conventional relationships that suck, as well as their share of escorts and hookers that are embarassing to bring out to social events…leaving them with no choice but to look for whores with credentials, cuz when you introduce your hooker as an ex-Playboy model, it’s status amongst the community, like a “I really made it and I’m living the good life” stamp of approval his neighbors envy…Like bitch automatically becomes the socially accepted whore….so when your fake titties have been in Playboy, there’s always a sugar daddy to fall back on….

Here are some stupid staged bikini and public weirdness the dude is loving cuz it makes him feel like he’s still got it, when clearly, there’s other things he’s got that got him this….not that bitch is hot, I actually can’t stand what she looks like, but you get what I am saying…bikini pics are bikini pics…enjoy her strategy to get noticed…that apparently works…cunt has a hold on me…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Bikini|Implants|Jenna Bentley|Playboy

2010

21

Apr

Shauna Sands Clown Tits of the Day

Shauna Sand is the kind of clown you hire for birthday parties, just not kids birthday parties, because her tricks involve using her vagina instead of a hat, which makes pulling the rabbit out of the shit both disturbing, disgusting, and pretty exciting, except for the fact that I’ve seen her vagina and shit looks like a week old Deli Platter with a mind of its own, like some kind of sea creature coming to eat it’s way through America, starting with Los Angeles aspiring Euro gay guys…not that you care….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Implants|Shauna Sand

2010

20

Apr

Jersey Shore Trash Get Her Nails Done in an Interesting Outfit of the Day

I have no interest in Jersey Shore. I think the whole concept is a waste of fucking time and I try to pretend people like this don’t actually exist in the world. I already had no hope in society, but when the gutter shit I’ve seen in clubs get their own show, whether they are being laughed at or not, I just can’t accept it or grasp that they get paid decent money to humiliate themselves….and America actually shows and interest and cares about what’s going on in their lives…it’s at the point where it’s no longer a joke, or comedy, or idiots on TV, it’s actually a fucking phenomenon….these people are “The Hills” status celebrity…and I guess this pig is the next Heidi Montag….and here she is getting her stripper looking trash a manicure in some stripper lookin’ outfit….the whole thing is fucking ridiculous and bitch isn’t hot…but she sure as hell thinks she is…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Implants|Jersey Shore|Trash

2009

02

Nov

Kelly Rowland and Her Shitty Implants in a Bikini of the Day

Kelly Rowland got the shitty end of the deal with that whole Destiny’s Child shit, not that she didn’t make great money doing the whole Destiny’s Child shit, even though no amount of money would be enough to stomach hanging with Beyonce and her bullshit over the course of a bunch of years, but because her partner went onto have a solo career and acting career, becoming this phenomenon all while Kelly Rowland is stuck training for the circus because that’s the only place a clown like her can get work.

The real confusing thing in all this, and what makes this story even more outrageous is the fact that Beyonce was the fat one and everyone knows the fat friend is the one who is supposed to be stuck on the backburner and ignored until one night when she finally stands up for herself and asks her skinny friend to leave one guy for her for a change, and that dude just happens to be you, forcing you to go home with the fat manager and not the chick you initially planned on going home with. If you know what I mean….if you don’t I’m trying to say that the fat friend doesn’t usually take the fuck over, she usually gets forgotten, but in Beyonce’s case, she became a fucking machine because I assume the millions of fat chicks who feel like they’ve been wronged, or like they’ve lost out to skinny chicks out there supported her quest to get to the top, despite everything working against her fat ass.

Either way, I wrote too much about this, when really all this is about is Kelly Rowland on the beach in a bikini while working out with some dude…..I went a little off track.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Bikini|Implants|Kelly Rowland

2009

12

Aug

Victoria Silvstedt’s Fake Tits of the Day

I figured I’d post these pictures of Victoria Silvstedt because fake tits are so fucking impresses, not only does all it take is 5,000 dollars to have a pair of your own, an amount of money that even a hurtbag like me could muster up if I really felt insecure about my tits, but they also give a false sense of confidence that propels girls into some next level whore behavior that usually leaves them getting their tits grabbed by strangers but sometimes if they are lucky they get jobs working for really rich dudes as a paid pussy….

Posted in:Fake Tits|Implants|Victoria Silvstedt

2009

09

Jul

Kelly Rowland’s Shitty Implants of the Day

Kelly Rowland spent her Destiny’s Child money on a set of fake tits. I think she should ask for a refund because they are clearly pretty fuckin’ shitty tit and she should spend that money on fixin’ her horse grill, because some of us like ridin’ horses, some of us like fucking horses, some of us even like betting on horses, but I’m pretty sure none of us like lookin’ like horses, especially not horses with bad tit jobs….

Now let me put it in terms Mr Ed will understand:

Naaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy you fuckin horsetoothed cunt…. NAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY!

Yes, I still haven’t figured out what I am doing….

Posted in:Implants|Kelly Rowland|Tits

2009

26

Jun

Katie Price and Her Big Tits of the Day

Katie Price brought out her fake tits the other night because she hasn’t really got much of a choice and they pretty much follow her wherever she goes, kinda like when I bring out my disgustingly fat everything, my little penis and my herpes. I’ve written about her so fuckin’ much the last few days and I am bored of her….

Posted in:Implants|Katie Price

2009

17

Jun

Tori Spelling Bikini Pictures of the Day

I didn’t expect the pictures of Tori Spelling in a bikini to be all that hot, I mean she is a Jewish girl afterall, and Jewish girls tend to have wonky heads, probably because of generations of inbreeding, unfortunately for Tori, she’s also got pretty wonky fuckin’ tits, probably because of a early 90s boob job her dad got her for her 16th birthday because she was born and raised in LA the pressure of being beautiful that was put on her by her trashy, superficial mother, when she wasn’t too busy drunk, medicated or fuckin the pool boy, made her feel like it was the only way, to counter balance her weird Jew face they couldn’t do much about, since face transplants weren’t technologically developed at the time, but the good news is that she’s rich. The other good news is that she’s not fat. So at least she’s got something goin’ for her….

Posted in:Bikini|Implants|Skinny|Tits|Tori Spelling

2009

17

Jun

Some More Katie Price Bikini Pictures of the Day

Since seeing these pictures of Katie Price in a bikini in Ibiza, I’ve decided that I want to move in on her and be her new husband who doesn’t fuck her, not because I wouldn’t want to fuck her dirty AIDS pussy, you know I’m talkin’ straight from an African village pussy, but I figure she won’t want to fuck me, you know, since I’m disgusting, even though I’m quite charming in the way I write on the internet, I know this will be the kind of push I need to get the media coverage I really deserve and need to pump into my site. That’s why, I’ve spent the last 24 hours, dancing on my table while throwing napkins and poppin’/pumpin bottles over my head in a bootleg Ed Hardy shirt while listening to David Guetta, whoever the fuck that is, so be warned Jordan, soon I’ll be the nude guy in the pictures with you only I’ll be coming for you in them and not talking on my mobile phone while showin of my gay ankle tatoo.

Posted in:Bikini|Implants|Jordan|Katie Price|Tits

2009

11

May

Audrina’s Fake Titties in a White Dress of the Day

Audrina may be useless, but her tits aren’t. Here are some pictures of them holding up a dress for Mother’s Day and her birthday. I wonder what else they can do. I am thinking act as a pretty good punching bag that I’d like to take out all my rage on, hopefully leaving her passed out in the gutter, naked and crying, or maybe as a nice landing pad for my cum after I’m done hate fucking her. I know I have nothing really interesting to say about her, but that’s because there’s nothing interesting about her and all I’m left with is frustration about why I’m not Audrina Patridge and no matter how long I close my eyes wishing that I was, I always see the same disgusting reflection in the mirror. So if anything, maybe Audrina isn’t useless, because she’s succeeded at making me hate myself more than I already do. Happy Fucking Birthday, Cunt.

Here is the video of her and her fake tits…..

Posted in:Audrina Patridge|Fake Tits|Implants

2009

17

Apr

Shauna Sand and Her Stupid Tits of the Day

Shauna Sand did what she does proper and that’s dress like a whore, only she made it a little more interesting by doing it in lingerie and pretty much fully exposing her disgusting fake breasts, an outfit you’d expect to see on stage at a strip club, but she’s managed to bring out to everyday life, without getting arrested for indecency, proving that not only is she a whore, but she’s also a trendsetter, style icon and will go down in history for her taste in clothes. I am talking some Jackie O shit, but instead of being a first lady, this bitch is a whore. I love it and it feels like home. Speaking of home, I need to go get drunk now because it is the only time I feel normal…like Shauna Sand needs her plastic shoes, I need my booze.

Posted in:cleavage|Implants|Shauna Sand|Stripper|Whore

2009

27

Mar

Pam Anderson’s Stupid Tits Go Shoppin’ for the Positive Post of the Day

So I’m trying to inject the site with a little positivity….and this is what I came up with….

Pam Anderson you look maternal. Not because you’ve got big enough to feed a third world country, because we all know that shit isn’t filled with milk, but with plastic, like some kind of science project for you kid’s science fair that will come in first fucking place, if you don’t mind just pullin them out of your top a little more for the judges, which you don’t.

You look like a good mother because you go grocery shopping, while other girls in your situation would just pass out all fucked up at 7 in the morning after an all night bender, forgetting where your kids are, but assuming the 24 hour nanny you hired, has everything under control.

For that, I celebrate you.

I don’t know if that was positive or not, I am still learning….

Posted in:Implants|old|Pam Anderson|Tits