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Archive for the Jog Category

2010

10

Mar

Real Housewife of New York Hard Nipples of the Day

Seeing hard nipples on a middle-aged gold digging women who is out on her own making it for herself is a lot more fun in person. It’s part of the reason I started volunteering at the YMCA years ago before getting fired for a mishap in the lady’s locker room but the good news is – I’ll always have the park bench where all these career woman with insane bodies go jogging by….and I guess these pictures of some useless fame whore with a Moroccan name who isn’t Moroccan but her money is that I’ve never heard of…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Bensimon|Jog|Nipples|Real Housewife

2010

05

Jan

Ashley Olsen’s Hipster Jog of the Day

I hate hipsters. I thought that shit would have died by now but for some reason it’s just become mainstream even though the idiot hipsters still think they are part of an exclusive group despite being part of the idiot masses. Something I thought was the total opposite of being a hipster so I get confused when I see a huge mass of jaded, cynical, indy people because I used to think “indy” or whatever it is that hipsters stand for besides no washing, pretending to be artists and cooler than fucking cool while dressing like they don’t have a trust fund….and you can partially blame the Olsen Twins and their “Hobo” chic back when they were the fashion icons they were labeled by the media despite lookin’ like Michael Jackson’s love child with a Treasure Troll and here she is taking her cause to another level while jogging and not missin’ a fucking beat from her marriage to leggings and ripped ratty flannel. What a fucking joke.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Ashley Olsen|Hipster|Jog

2009

09

Nov

Kelly Ripa’s Vagina That Has Had Many Kids is in Tight Pants of the Day

Kelly Ripa was showing off her real skinny body and flat ass in a pair of tight jogging pants, and I couldn’t help but notice the shit giving her vagina a nice little hug, because I guess the fuckin’ thing gets sad sometimes when it remembers a time before it was violated by her 12 kids cuz she married a latino and we like to breed, you know back when the fucking thing didn’t have a mind of its own and when it didn’t look like it was permanently throwing up its uterus, but I could be wrong, maybe this is just the style….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Jog|Kelly Ripa|Vagina

2009

22

Sep

Helena Christensen goes for a Jog of the Day

Ex-Supermodels jogging would be my new porn if this was actually hot. Instead it’s just a reminder than any bitch you end up with is going to end up a lot uglier than she started out, and even more depressing is that any bitch you end up with won’t even look this good when you get started out, pretty much confirming what we all already know about you and that is that you should just go HOMO.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Helena Christensen|Jog

2009

21

May

Anna Faris And Her Crotch in Period Short of the Day

Here is that pretty irrelevant actress who gets cast in shitty movies you would probably only watch at 5 in the morning after coming home alone wasted when it’s on TV and you’re lying in bed and too lazy to go to the computer and figure your best chance to get off is a story about a Playboy bunny becoming a Sorority girl, only to wake up 10 hours later, still drunk with your underwear around your ankles and your dick still in hand, with random memories of the night before, coming in wasted and alone because the girl who was dancing provocatively didn’t go home with you and trying to jerk yourself to sleep to some shitty B movie, but unsure if you ever finished. That’s the kind of girl Anna Faris is and here she is showing off her pussy in a pair of period shorts.

Posted in:Anna Faris|Crotch|flash|Jog

2009

12

Mar

Audrina Titty Bounce Run of the Day

Not much better than watching a girl run across the street, you know her titties bouncing in a way you can visualize shit to be like the Baywatch intro you all jerked off to at least once if you’re older than 20 years old. Unfortunately, when the bitch is not naked or half naked, or is Audrina, despite the big tits, it just isn’t worth bothering, and I guess in keeping this site useless, I have no choice but to post it, I am in too deep, but I am warning you, this is going to be a waste of your time….

Here’s a video of her leaving some restaurant called Nobu last night….

Posted in:Audrina Partidge|Jog|Titty Bounce

2009

05

Feb

Jordan Going for a Fake Jog of the Day

If you’re wondering how Jordan keeps her slim figure, it’s definitely not by working out and staying active, it is from starving herself, suckin’ dick, plastic surgery and probably a drug addiction,or maybe her pussy’s so busted up and diseased that it’s become some kind of parasite with a metabolism of it’s own that feeds off her fat reserve, but I don’t know if that’s possible, and if it is she’d be attaching her name to it, branding it and selling her pussy juice in decorative tubs to fat chicks, because Jordan like most whores, do it all for the money.

Just don’t let these pictures of her jogging fool you, it’s a staged scene from what I assume is a reality show that I hope no one watches because her face is so doctored she looks like a fucking cartoon and here are the pics.

Posted in:Jog|Jordan|Katie Price|Reality

2008

02

Oct

Kim Kardashian Takes a Shitty Fat Chick Jog of the Day

I always find it funny seeing fat people work out. I don’t know what it is but I always laugh in their face and feel the need to give them words of encouragement like I am watching someone run a marathon and are covered in shit and puke and 100 yards away from the finish line, only instead of actually doing anything impressive, the fat people are fully decked out in sports gear and are walking briskly, but still manage to have the look of impending death on their faces. I guess it’s nice to see people attempt to improve their overall health, but sometimes its a little too late for them and they should have probably taken the initiative by saying no to cake over the last 10 years of their life. I mean I am a fat guy and I live with a fat woman and I see both of us struggle to do everyday things, like fit into chairs, stand up after sitting on the couch and even when trying to fuck we end up giving up because of pulled muscles, uncontrollable heart rates and light headedness, which has turned out to be the greatest excuse no to bang my wife and also to never dress up in athletic gear and make a fool of myself in public.

Here’s Kim Kardashian still delusional about being a fat chick, she seriously thinks she’s normal sized and has the right to do what normal sized people do and that is funny.

Posted in:Fat Ass|Jog|Kim Kardashian

2008

03

Jul

Pink Goes for a Jog of the Day

Gender Benders are everywhere and if I was to make a big deal about seeing a man in a bikini, I’d be a hypocrite since I made a man with tits flash me the other day for 5 dollars. I thought it would make a good internet video, one that would take this site to the next level, but I don’t own a camera so only I got to see it. I know you are jealous, but that’s just because you are sexually confused, and to make you feel better about your sexual dysfunction, the majority of people who fuck tranny prostitutes are actually straight. I guess they just relate to boys pretending to be girls better than they relate to their haggard wives pretending to be girls.

Either way, here’s Pink training for the sex change or to become a mover in a bikini top, because she hasn’t quite made her tits transition into full man pecs yet and running around topless would still be deemed offensive, even more offensive than her in a bikini, something you thought wasn’t possible, but it is, so be grateful she’s covered up.

Posted in:Bikini|Jog|Pink

2008

16

Jun

Fergie Takes a Jog of the Day

Fergie is known for being fit and having a tight body, a body so ripped it looks like it may have a pair of little steroid testicles tucked between her legs. I was actually convinced I met Fergie last night at a bar until I realized that I was actually talking to some dude who happened to be a mixed martial arts fighter and went on about how badly he likes breaking bones, while wearing some kind of faggy cut off shirt showing off her “pythons”.

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Posted in:Fergie|Jog

2008

21

Apr

Pink Red Bikini Jog of the Day

I got a Lesbian show at the strip club with my friend’s money this past weekend. The girls were fuckin’ bitches and money hungry because all these Americans came in with all their money for the UFC fight I didn’t go to and it turns out that American’s don’t have stripclubs quite like these stripclubs. The bitch wanted 40 dollars a song or a half hour for 400 dollars that ends with one of them squirting. I got into a debate about how squirting is a myth and whenever a girl actually squirts she’s really just pissing, so if I wanted to watch a girl piss, I’d just follow a homeless chick around. They told me that it wasn’t piss, and asked if the room smelled like piss, because she had just squirted all over the place and I told them that I didn’t know if it smelled like piss but it definitely smelled bad. They whispered something in French about how I was some kind of asshole who wasn’t going to pay them as much as the last guys tipped them, which was true because after they put on a staged dyke show, licked each others assholes and made me feel awkward because it was so bad and they wanted me to be so into it but I couldn’t perform, something I am used to, I ended it at one song because for another 40 dollars I could buy a couple more drinks that would give me more pleasure.

Lookin’ at Pink jogging in a bikini makes me wonder whether her lesbian sex is as bad as the stripper lesbian sex I saw, or whether she’s actually got a clit and by clit I mean dick big enough to penetrate her partner because without penetration, you’ve pretty much just got foreplay and there’s nothing exciting about that.

Posted in:Jog|Pink|Red Bikini

2008

31

Jan

Ellen Pompeo See-Through Jog of the Day

So the star of Grey’s Anatomy is showing her own anatomy while jogging somewhere in a see through shirt and I just made a lame fucking joke and feel like I was your real dad and this was some kind of dinner party with all your friends and I totally embarrassed you, but not as bad as the time you caught me in the bathroom at your Sweet 16 Slumber party trying to convince your hot friend that my tongue was the roll of toilet paper minutes before getting her pregnant and having to explain to her parents that I couldn’t afford to pay for half of her abortion, but if they covered it up front, I could pay them back in installments. That was a mess we don’t want to relive, kinda like this post because it sucks.

Speaking of sucking, Ellen Pompeo has some pretty shitty tits and it’s not because they are small it’s because they look like they are placed where a normal person’s belly button would be, which I guess isn’t that back because they aren’t hangin lower than my self esteem after writing this piece of shit and I blame you. Asshole.


Related Posts:

Katherine Heigl is Pickin’ Her Ass
Katherine Heigl in a Sports Bra and Ugly Shorts
Katherine Heigl’s Dumpy Ass in a Bikini Bottom
Katherine Heigl Bikini Top Photoshoot

Posted in:Ellen Pompeo|Jog|Unsorted

2007

18

Dec

I am – Brooke Hogan’s Sports Bra Jog of the Day

brooke-hogan-jog-top.jpg

Here are some pictures of Brooke Hogan joggin in a sports bra, because she’s trying to maintain her massive body and fake tit figure. It takes a lot of work to turn yourself from a fat girl with no tits, a curse worse than death to becoming a big girl with a washboard stomach and fake tits.

I was at some shitty bar in another city the other day and it turned out that everyone in the place was a useless fucking loser. The girls were disgusting but thought they had it going on and the dudes who were getting bottle service were all old married men who thought buying bottles would score these pieces of trash, when in reality all dude needed to do was offer to take these whores to McDonald’s or shit because they were low budget.

I ended up checking out some tall broad bitch with no ass but broad shoulders and ripped muscular arms. She had shitty hair extensions and looked like Brooke Hogan with a penis. There was no way bitch wasn’t a dude in women’s clothing, but the older married bottle service dude was just so happy that some younger “girl” was showing interest in him and was blinded by the attention and didn’t notice she was really a he. So as this drunken dude tried making out with her while getting a lap dance from her, he thought he was balling and years of hard work in middle-management paid off without realizing the girl on his dick wasn’t a girl and I thought about putting on a dress to get free booze too, because I am pretty accommodating for free booze, but realized that my natural man tits wouldn’t get the kind of attention I deserve.


Related Posts:

Brooke Hogan Bikini Top in Miami
Brooke Hogan Dancing Around in Her Underwear on Stage
Brooke Hogan in Assless Pants
Brooke Hogan’s Bikini Ass

Posted in:Big|Jog|Unsorted