Minka Kelly is one of these barely-a-celebrity – celebrities that I totally missed the boat on.

Meaning that when she was not 39 years old and in her prime, you know back when she was sucking dick to get into movie and TV roles that she probably didn’t consider sucking dick to get into those jobs, they never do….I had no idea who she was and still don’t.

WHICH ONE IS SHE IN THIS PIC? SERIOUSLY

She was born to Aerosmith guitarist Rick Dufay and a groupie mom. I have no idea if her dad was in her life or if it was more of a sperm donation situation. She worked for a plastic surgeon who was going to give her tits instead of a paycheck, to which she said “No thanks, I have my own tits” and the rest is history.

She want on to be on tv shows I’ve never seen and a Maroon 5 video I’ve never seen and I just know that people are excited by her and here is her old ass tits in a bikini, even though they’ve been cum on by Derek Jeter between 2008 and 2011 and his sperm is toxic..a medical biohazard thanks to living that good life.

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This is the most important you will see of Minka Kelly to date.

I am sure when things fuck up for her officially, or when she goes officially broke….and no rich dudes will want to fuck her…

There will be VAGINA…

But for now…it’s tits..and tits are good enough for people like me…who don’t watch porn because the people in it are gross and it rots your brain and kills your creativity as it is all presented in front of you like some kind of buffet….for your lazy retard brands…

Then again maybe we don’t want to see her VAGINA.

She was engaged to Derek Jeter and he’s known to have herpes and you know that’s the gift that keeps on giving…

But in her defense…everyone in Hollywood has herpes.. It’s their secret handshake so you know you’re in the club.

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I know Minka Kelly is a legitimate name in acting, hollywood, bullshit….

But I can never place her, I just categorize her in Oliva Munn / Olivia Wilde/ and the other 40 year olds trying to prove they are still hot.

I know that nerds love her, I see her name come up, but nerds love everything they see on TV or in their Nerd Shows, because they have no one to love in real life….

Meaning, I don’t take their opinion too seriously, even if it can make people exploiting their autism very rich…I’m not that dude.

Instead I make fun of the girls you jerk off to and you hate me for it, while the cool people, the bullies like me don’t read the site cuz they are too busy not being nerds…so I should re-evaluate my strategy…not that I have one but Minka Kelly apparently does.

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Minka Kelly is one of these actresses who all the weird nerdy dudes get a hard on for, because I guess she’s just so fucking basic and accessible they feel like they’ve got a shot, without realizing that when you take a average looking girl, celebrate her, pay her well, give her work…she gets this ego and thinks she’s fucking hot and can’t fully process that they are average at best, sure there’s the typical woman insecurities, but ultimately, she’ll only fuck money, hang with money and do money thing, a consumer, her life filled with stuff…not down to earth at all but rather an ego who thinks she’s more important than people while pretending to be down to earth…it’s all nonsense…

But watching her and her 40 year old seducing us by eating in public erotica….is a fetish…a weird fetish but a fetish nevertheless.

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Minka Kelly is parts unknown, I really can’t place her, I am assuming she’s some actress pushing 40 trying to prove she’s still got hotness in her leggings, thanks to extreme squatting because whatever we’re looking at is muscular, perky, round and lovely…and I guess knowing who Minka Kelly is doesn’t matter, when you can stare at her ass…which may not matter either but it’s better than other parts of her…so like fucking a fat girl with big tits, focus on the good she has to offer…that’s what she wants you to do..otherwise she wouldn’t be posing like this.

VIDEOS:

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Minka Kelly has some hard nipples while walking the dog and it is pretty magical for those of you who like hard nipples, who think hard nipples are a thing, who enjoy putting hard nipples in your mouth – either at a strip club or with someone you’ve hired, because nipples are the focal point of the tit, without them, you’re just a breast cancer survivor…

Mastectomy Jokes…like rape jokes…never a hit at a party filled with a bunch of girls…at least not the right girls…because one on one they’d laugh…but collectively…they’d just give you dirty fucking looks…bitches.

I don’t know who Minka Kelly is, but she’s got a dumb name and that may be all I need to know…and really I probably know who she is if someone told me who she was but no one likes talking to me some I’m in this alone…luckily google can save me…if ONLY I cared enough to google such important things like “Who’s hard nipples on the dog walk am I staring at, she seems important”….

I guess I should say something like “Look at Minka Kelly Taking Her Puppies for a Walk”…or “Boy, I wish I had a dog walker like this, I’d walk backwards in front of her for days, and maybe then I wouldn’t die of diabetes….because chasing nipples is a motivating exercise”… but I won’t, even though I guess I just did.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Minka Kelly|SFW