Rachel Bilson’s looking so old, I actually had to google to see if she was Summer from the OC, or if I was getting my pickled alcoholic retard brain confused with someone else…..

Maybe it’s dementia, or maybe Rachel Bilson hasn’t captivated my heart in the way that she did when on the OC, which was a great show and something you had to watch if you wanted to fuck the college aged girls at the bars you were the creepy old guy at.

Summer was hot, now she’s in her 40s, and the decent sized tits are less fun than they were. She’s a mom with some Canadian from Star Wars.

Even though she got cancelled from a job for talking perverted shit about how she likes taking dick, typical 40+ conversation that bores me because it’s like “Grow Up” or “Keep it to yourself” or where was that energy when you were 20 and at your hottest on a hot show being hot…this bores me…HOWEVER…it is cleavage….and CLEAVAGE always wins..

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

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Rachel Bilson or Summer from the OC, which is basically where we all fell in love with her, since that show was arguably the best thing on TV, a timeless classic, and I’ve even revisited it and Bilson is as hot as I remember and the show as relevant and worth watching as it was back then.

Sure, I used the intel from the show to connect with college girls where I would drink for cheap and try to fuck….but it was still a great show….

Anyway, I read an article, barely, I don’t know how to read….call 1-800-ABCDEFG or some shit….but IT WORKED FOR ME…..and in said article, Summer who is not 45 said she didn’t cum since she was 38, which is fucking weird…..but all girls who have sex with me don’t cum, THE DRYNESS CAUSES FRICTION SO I CAN FEEL…..so I get how that can happen, even though girls who do cum don’t really understand why you’d have sex if you can’t cum, and really what’s wrong with you psychologically if you don’t know how to cum, not even from jerking your clit of like you’re trying to get a spider off your leg….or like you have parkinsons or epilepsy…you know with panic and vigor….

Anyway…she went onto say she likes being fucked missionary, because she’s lazy and likes dudes doing all the work, but she packaged it as “I like being fucking manhandled”….my god Summer, menopause has got you racy…..then she said she likes being on top, now that she knows how to cum, that’s how she does it…and her least favorite is doggy, because the big dicks she fucks, she’s Summer, why would she fuck Small dicks….HURT….and not in a HURT SO GOOD way…

All this to say, this intel would be far more exciting 20 fucking year ago…..

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Rachel Bilson is have a girl’s night, in what could be a lame ass sleep over, or even worse a get in your pyjamas for a pyjama party where they watch chick flicks, drink wine, order pizza and eat Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream out of the pint, because they are rich people and don’t need none of that bootleg shit us simpletons eat….

She’s doing this because she’s old as fuck and this is what old ladies do for a good night, maybe they got the idea on some mommy blog, who knows, but it’s lame.

The good news is that her jammies are riding up her ass harder than Hayden Christensen did back when he held her captive in Canada and knocked her up, because I did watch The O.C. and I did find her to be the hottest on the show…and for that she’ll forever be hot, even when lame as shit…

Posted in:Rachel Bilson