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Archive for the SFW Category




Lindsay Lohan Ass Picker of the Day


Lindsay Lohan will never die. She’s proved that her career can die, but this bitch can take an obscene amount of abuse…and still manages to have an ass I’d love to eat, even knowing that it’s tainted, but also that it’s probably never shit, because she’s some cocaine fueled robot with no soul…not that a shitting ass would be a turn off for me eating ass, I’m mean it’s something I deal with everytime I eat ass, and apparently, the ass always wins….I mean…as a general concept…because the fact it’s being eating by me…means it’s actually lost…

To see more pics of LOhan in a bikini CLICK HERE

But if you’re over her, like the film industry and producers are, here’s her replacement, co-star from Mean Girls, who I assume cast a spell on Lohan when they were in the same room, to either steal Lohan’s career…and/or…do Lohan better than lohan….Amanda Seyfried…in Leggigns…

Actress Amanda Seyfried, wearing a 'Save Them All' t-shirt from Best Friends Animal Society, walks to the gym


Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW




Elsa for GQ Magazine Mexico of the Day


Elsa Hosk is Swedish, yet she’s in GQ Mexico…how’s that make sense? Is this globalization? Or is this just making a girl an international success…

The fact is that she’s disappointing, because before she was a VS model on their promotional tour, she was a nude model, getting naked in fashion editorials that may have had no point, but that involved naked girls, and naked girls, is all the story I need for a fashion editorial, or really any editorial, I grew up jerking off to Playboy, I can appreciate that vibe in the mainstream, more than throat fucking, humiliation, teen porn…I’m wholesome like that…

What I am saying is, these pics aren’t naked enough for a girl who gets naked…

Posted in:Elsa Hosk|SFW




Nina Agdal Has Eats Lipstick and Has No Nipples of the Day


If you’re wondering what’s new in Nina Agdal, the annoying, loud, drunk, Danish model who I think lives in Miami….despite looking like a retard who shoudl probably live in a retard home…

She’s been eating Lipstick…

A video posted by Nina Agdal (@ninaagdal) on

And has no Nipples…

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Who cares.

Posted in:SFW




Charlotte McKinney Boobie Play of the Day


These are some screencaps from some GQ produced “viral video” called “How to Date Charlotte McKinney”…

Where you can get sucked into her up talking, dumb sounding, florida trash….lying about how she dates, who she dates, or what she thinks about dating, she’s just talking in Cliches while looking more unattractive than I originally thought…snorting and swearing like the drunk hooters girls she was mean to be….

What she forgets to say is “Rich and Connected” and/or “ex celebrity Stephen Dorff”….

She’s the worst…and doesn’t belong…here’s the video anyway – you’re welcome GQ….

But a reminder that America, the land of big tits, is still ass obesessed, but back to being tit obsessed, which I guess is a familiar place, even though I like ass, as tits come in so many shapes and sizes I can enjoy, while asses are just hit and miss….flat all back, fat, sloppy, etc…

So Big tits are back in, not that they were ever out, but they weren’t getting the same love asses were….but now they have the power to create something as shit as Charlotte McKinney…so never underestimate the power of tits…

Here she is talking about her boobs on Cosmo…for the men….pretending to be for the women…and that face…it’s so bad…

Here are some paparazzi pics of her “Bra less” because this bitch MILKS things Hard CLICK HERE

Posted in:Charlotte McKinney|SFW




Hailee Steinfeld Bikini Top of the Day


Hailee Steinfeld is the tall, awkward, weird looking, average acting, actor from I don’t fucking know what..

I just remember her as some underage actress I am sure at least one of you has masturbated to, mainly because you are perverts, but also because America made sexualizing her illegal, and everyone is drawn to what they aren’t allowed to do…or maybe men are just drawn to underage girls in some unhealthy, obsessive weird way…thinking they are fresh and untouched, even though girls get their periods at 4 years old now, and have sex by 8…with everyone in their class…all thanks to internet porn and hormones in the food…

Now she’s showing her tits in a bikini, because it’s summer and people like showing their tits in bikinis…it comes across as less desperate….and slutty, even if it’s a “hey look at me in a bikini”…which by default is desperate and slutty….exhibitionist behavior…

Posted in:Hailee Steinfeld|SFW




Lily Collins on a Paddleboard in a Bikini of the Day


Lily Collins has a career of her own. I am sure it has nothing to do with her dad being Phil Collins…the singer…of such classics as…su su sudio…

And everything to do with raw talent…and/or how scandalous she gets on instagram…with these bikini pics of her paddleboarding like a 40 year old mom on a retreat or some shit…

I need more crawling around on all fours…But there’s a bikini and bikinis get noticed by me..


Posted in:Lily Collins|SFW




Kelsey and Baylee Soles are the Twin Sisters People are Excted About of the Day

Anyone who has had a threesome will tell you “they weren’t all that hot, but there were two of them”….it takes a real lottery win, and/or a lot of money or fame, to land a threesome with two serious fucking babes…and I guess the same goes for twins….Two is better than one.

The PR team behind Soles Twins, are pushing this shit aggressively. They are all over Vogue and DailyMail, and all these other magazines, excited that there are new twins who are decent looking enough, you know in this hipster world, but more importantly, tall and skinny enough, to make it in the world of modeling…

A world, that I find cheesy as fuck, posing for the sake of posing, while everything thinks they are fucking models…and any girl, no matter what her face looks like, gets signed if she’s over 5 foot 8….

So I don’t find these girls hot, but they are getting hype, and I guess that’s enough for me to notice…but more importantly, #skinny #legs…

I don’t believe they are the next Olsens, or even the Barbie Twins, or the Budweiser Twins….But I do believe in skinny legs….I also believe that twins all fuck each other, even fraternal twins, because they have weird connections, and it’s technically masturbation…and incest…all at once..

Here’s some of there uneventful pics, making me believe, they have very expensive team pushing them because why else would I fucking know them…It’s not like I’m front row at fashion week. I don’t even get off my couch…or even browse the interent that aggressive.

Posted in:Baylee Soles|Kelsey Soles|SFW




Gisele Bundchen Gossip of the Day

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This is pretty next level…

The story is Gisele celebrated her 35th birthday by getting new tits, or 11,000 dollars of surgeries, which isn’t the scandal, we know all these people have plastic surgery, their looks are their everything, their purpose….

It gets better…she did it while dressing like a Muslim woman in full religious burqa…because shitting on a religion to stay anonymous is genius, especially when it is for new tits….

But she did did it with her regular driver and open toed shoes….

Hilarious fail, probably to distract from Tom Brady on Facebook, or whatever else is going on….

I can assume this will lead to some retaliation, but to muslims, lingerie models are probably already all evil…as their rich oil money hire to shit on them….

Best disguise ever…especially in Paris, a place where the paparazzi are powerful enough to kill royalty..

Here’s some pics of her because why not celebrate this crazy stunt…

Posted in:Gisele Bundchen|SFW




Kylie Jenner in Tongues Her Sister for Snapchat of the Day

Like Tyga, the pervert who sticks his dick inside what I assume is a teen – pregnant Kylie Jenner, at least based on her ass implants…I just can’t get enough of Kylie Jenner…

She’s like a stage show, novelty act, the closest thing to Truman Show, who has been on TV her entire life, and thus totally crazy, delusional and weird…making too much money, neglected by a whoring family, all looking 40 with plastic surgery…and I love it all..

She has turnt up for the pre-18…and not just by fucking older black dudes who probably fuck a lot of girls, based on the kid he has with a hooker…her sister has gone to the media to discuss their sex….the whole thing ridiculous, but possibly perfect…and here she is fake tongue kissing her sister…weird…

Here’s the other Kylie in some Magazine…

Here’s the other Kylie’s cameltoe…

Screen Shot 2015-07-29 at 6.14.27 PM

Posted in:Kylie Jenner|SFW




Dylan Penn for Some Catalog of the Day


Dylan Penn is average at best…you know if you were to find her standing randomly on the street somewhere…

But when you factor in that her dad is Sean Penn and her mom Robin Wright….all of a sudden that is what takes over…and average looking turns into modeling contract, and modeling contract turns into campaigns, because idiots like me, think people care about celebrity kids, their spoiled brat, raised by monster self involved rich cunts because people do care…people have nothing better to do that obsess over these idiots who have become the icons, or cool kids of our generation, when they are really just rich, scam artist garbage…

Either way, here’s the campaign..if you’re into that shit, and you are, because she’s the in to that world…and didn’t have to suck dick to get there…which I guess is boring…but can balance out when you think of all the dick she probably has sucked thanks to being a fucked up rich kid in a fucked up rich world…

Posted in:Dylan Penn|SFW




Beyonce’s Big Cleavage Tumblr Hipster of the Day


Beyonce isn’t hot…

Beyonce thinks she’s the hottest fucking shit…and she’s producing pics like she’s a hipster chick, when she’s actually a 30 something year old mom who doesn’t understand that she’s a 30 something year old mom…

This is what happens when people make too much money, and spend their entire lives being sucked up to by a crew…

This is also what happens when your husband is surrounded by groupie pussy, and makes millions a year of Bajan pussy, who can pull the sex thing, because she’s broken and from an island and it makes sense…she’s sucked some dick to this…While Beyonce was in Fucking Destiny’s child..But she does have tits, and makes fun Miley Gifs…






Posted in:Beyonce|SFW




Rita Ora’s Men’s Shirt Porn of the Day


Rita Ora wore a men’s shirt and fuck me boots while leaving a hotel or brothel or whatever this is…

Mens Shirts with party footwear, like heels or fuck me boots are the number one walk of shame solution for girls who don’t like walking around in last night’s party dress because it is covered in cum and vomit…and stale beer…

If this was a girl, who I worked with, not that I work with people, but you know what I mean, my neighbor or the coffee shop employee or really anyone…I’d be all about this..

Since it is Rita Ora who only exists because she’s a whore, it’s not all that interesting..but in her defense, none of these idiots are…


Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW




Anais Pouliot for Some Magazine of the Day


I have spoke about this ANAIS POULIOT before….she is some French Canadian I’ve never met, but should have met, but probably is best I didn’t meet, because French Canadian girls are the fucking worst level 9 crazy there is, and those are the ones stripping and thinking they are the shit, not the ghetto bitches who ended up being huge models..that aren’t that huge but huge enough to be living in NYC doing NYC things..

All this to say, french girls have anal on the first date that doesn’t even need to be a date…

She’s not as naked as she normally is, I guess she’s going legit..and mainstream…

Posted in:Anais Pouliot|SFW




Lily Donaldson for The Telegraph Bikini Shoot of the Day


Lily Donaldson is going through a mid life crisis…at least that is what I assume is going on with this 30 year old model who didn’t maximize her career when she was at her peak, she took it for granted, and I guess things are just slowing down for her and it’s time to call on her friends to get her press…

Because Lily Donaldson, a British model who was a Victoria’s Secret contract worker that they pushed under the rug and forgot about in 2012, as they do…because these girls are replaceable, especailly the uneventful ones….

Maybe she’s just looking for a rich husband, and the 2012 VS girl isn’t good enough for the billionaires, they want to marry something current..

Either way, she’s in a standardized bikini shoot, that bores me, but that is a half naked model for you…because I prefer girls naked, on my floor, doing iphone shoots….

Posted in:Lily Donaldson|SFW




The Highlight of the Michelle Rogriguz Bikini Pics…of the Day

Is the girl who isn’t Michelle Rodgiguez…


Posted in:Michelle Rodriguez|SFW