I know you’re all sitting their in fear that Snooki may have got fed after midnight or sprayed with water…and her gremlin monster babies are about to pollute our world….reminding us that the Mayans did warn us of the end of the world by the end of 2012…and that it’s quite possible this is what they were talking about…..

But…as expected…it was just a publicity stunt, maybe a classic case of “Broken Telephone”….where someone in the public washroom overheard her while she was taking a shit say something like “come on baby, get out of my belly”….or maybe it was a classic case of short fat bitch all round in what could either be uterus or gut….and who really cares…it’s Snooki….why am I talking about her….more importantly why do I know she exists…..

I guess what I’m getting at is that we’re safe for now….but unless someone doesn’t give her a back alley hysterectomy…. we’re all at risk..

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Here are some pictures of Snooki looking like she may or may not be skinnier than she used to be, but still the troll you’d expect her to be,, and while you question why the fuck you even know why this bitch exists, or why she’s got merchandise, or how she’s become a fucking brand, I’ll just stare and her shitty trashy tits in a shitty trassy bra cuz she’s wearing a see through shirt, when in reality she should be diddling her twat to get fucking noticed….The devil is amongst us, now look at ther tits while she’s underservingly money making…perverts.

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It amazes me that Jersey Shore Exists. It amazes me when I talk to people who watch it religiously because I just wouldn’t put myself through that kind of shit for no reason, I feel like life has punished me enough….and I’ve done enough self abusive things that I can live a happy miserable life without this shit…..

It also amazes me that there are a group of people who watch the show, cuz they think these people are cool…I mean I just assumed as an industrialized nation, the only reason they exist is cuz people point and laugh at the the trainwreck…

It amazes me even more that anyone, even in Vegas, the asshole of America, would pay this pig to get half naked and host events….because the last time I paid for a pig to wear a bikini….it was when I was living on a farm and I got to cook the fucker and eat him over the course of a week when I was done fucking it….

That said, some stories are better kept to myself.

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I just hope someone Owen Harts this bitch…you know some real wrestler shit that leaves her dead before the age of 65…..you know like some Chris Benoit murder suicide, or Owen Hart broken neck in the ring, or some Andre The Giant too large for her heart to keep her going….or pretty much anything that ends her useless fucking existence because she doesn’t deserve any of the “fame” she’s got…I shouldn’t know who this monster is…being a punchline of a joke shouldn’t be so prosperous…bitch should be in the corner feeling inadequate and suicidal…not basking in every second of it…She is the fucing worse, even if she doesn’t need a costume for this gig. These novelty act PR stunts don’t help….FOLLOW ME

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I will never understand Snooki or why she is famous. I will never understand how this happened, cuz she’s just a fat little ditch pig you’d expect to be rolling around in her own shit after a night of hard drinking in the privacy of her home town, and not on TV for the world to look at and try to make sense out of….You idiots made her a best selling author…I don’t think you realize how wrong that shit is….Just last year she was writing her name in period blood on her ex hook-ups bathroom mirror, cuz it was the only word she knew….It freaks me out.

Big tits lose their appeal when they are hanging over a big stomach. Trust me, I know this shit first hand cuz fat chicks like me enough since they have no one else….

Watching her make these faces in hopes of hiding her ugly, while looking like an idiotic myspace profile pout from the 2000s, is kinda funny….

There is nothing hot about this….

This post was inspired by this bikini picture…

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Shit, Snooki on the cover of Rolling Stone or any magazine for that matter, you know with her little pig face, pig body and pig attitude is almost as crazy as Kim Kardashian releasing a song and hearing people give it praise even if it sounds like serious shit…maybe even the same shit that fell on her face when sucking Ray J’s dick in video as he pissed on her….

The world is doomed. We’re fucked, We’ve made celebrities out of garbage. Satan has taken over. We’re all going to die. We might as well try to enjoy the ride…

There’s nothing hot about this…seriously…this is unfuckable barnyard shit……

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It makes no sense to me that a pig like this is being followed by the paparazzi, landing book deals, has a TV show, when really I’d expect her to be working at the mall, or the bowling ally, where she spends her days eating chocolate and candy, and her nights at the all you can eat buffet, before getting shit faced with all her friends who decided to go to college instead of being the slob in the corner, passed out with her piss covered panties exposed…

She is disgusting, like the girl that no matter how loud she gets isn’t worth noticing, even when throwing herself at you at 3 am, desperate to have a dick in her mouth to feel validated….

But for some reason, she’s a star in America and her waistline just can’t justify that.

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The fact that this half retarded troll is on a book tour makes me really question the state of America. I realize that she probably didn’t write the shit, but the fact that a publisher would put out the shit, is fucking scary and not even because she’s an ugly, pig of a person who seems like she was created in a fucking trash can outside a local stripclub when a used condom from one of the clients accidentally got a used tampon fertilized, but because everything that comes out of her mouth is everything that is wrong with America and now it is immortalized in book with all the greats before her, like Hemingway and Mark Twain and people who actually knew how to spell their fucking names…..Clearly, this is a product of publishers trying to stay current, relevant and meet sales objectives, it is their answer to not go broke, cuz no one reads anymore and if they do it’s on the internet or at the level of a third grader…we are all fucking doomed.

Here is disgusting on some Roseanne Barr kick making me nervous cuz I know when things like this are idolized the end is near

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I always knew this bitch was classier than she lets on…I mean she’s wearing a crown and that shit is only for princesses and queens….there’s no way a tacky trash can midget troll with fat chick tits who thinks she’s more important and fancier than she is now that she’s living the good life thanks to getting drunk on TV when her ugly fake tan midget face isn’t too busy talking bullshit on a show that pretty much reminds me that the end is fucking near…oh wait…clearly there is a way…and here are the pictures….

Apparently it’s her birthday or some shit, even though every day is her fucking birthday thanks to all the undeserved fameas far as I’m concerned….Don’t ask my why I’m bothering posting these cuz I don’t have an answer for you other than I’ve been drunk the last 3 days and I’m confused.

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I was forced to watch Jersey Shore for the first time with a group of people who love Jersey Shore…and it was as bad as I expected. I couldn’t believe why or how anyone watches this low quality staged bullshit…even the pussy they cast is disgusting and not worth lookin’ at…but for some reason I call marketing…this show is a hit in mainstream America, they are eating it up and that scares me….

So I don’t understand the appeal of the show. I don’t know how anyone could relate or not get annoyed watching it after a few minutes, but maybe I just don’t get the human experience as much as I should…maybe people just like garbage and that would explain why I feel so alone in hating on everything, especially when it is popular…

More importantly,there is no way anyone looks at Snooki and sees anything appealing…this is the kidn of girl you don’t even notice on the street unless she’s fingering herself while puking….and I can only assume they like cuz they are bored, she is a train wreck, but I still hate that she thinks she’s hot…

That said, my facebook went nuts last night with people watching a Snooki Spoof on Southpark….I had no idea South Park was still on the air….but it is pretty accurate and relevant depiction of this shit…

And here are Snooki’s tits to celebrate…remember, only you can stop watching the show, making them cancel it and sending her back to Walmart where she looks like she should work….

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I know guys love this shit. I don’t know why…but for some reason anytime I post anything on Snooki my server goes fucking nuts. I look at her and see someone I wouldn’t even notice on the street and if I did, it would probably because I thought she was some kind of street performer, clown, homeless person dressed like that for money…I would not believe something that looks like this is not on afternoon leave from some institution caring for for hybrid humans created in a lab during wartime…or the circus….Even when she shows off her fat tits on her thick troll body, I can’t get over just how freakish and abnormal she is….apparently you are into the girl no one ever wanted except when drunk and closet cased but she managed to sneak onto TV cuz she’s a joke of a person…and the whole thing just really confuses the fuck out of me…

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When I look at asses shaped like this, and bodies shaped like this, and faces shaped like this, and legs shaped like this- I find it hard to believe the cunt this is attached to has made it in the world. It makes me question what is wrong with our world, when pussy this dumpy gets ahead. Not that Jersey Shore is actually “making it” or “getting ahead” but it’s a hell of a lot further along that any of the drunk idiots I know…including myself…and that depresses me…There is nothing appealing about this slob. If anything it is fucking vile and sure, I get she does it for laughs cuz she’s a joke, like the clown that she is, but I don’t think that’s not enough to warrant a bitch getting paid the way Snooki does….MTV must die for polluting us with these people….

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There was a time in my life that I wanted to go into the Mechanical Bull business. I remember finding a used one and thought that I could rent it out at parties and to make extra money I’d videotape the hot chicks in mini skirts on the shit, titties bouncing around to put on the internet…

So in doing my research for this business venture, I went to a local bar with a mechanical bull, and I realized that the percentage of hot chicks who get on the thing are minimal and when they do get on it, they are all dainty and lady-like and manage to cover every interesting body part, but there were endless ugly, sloppy drunk girls, I’m talking a line of them who for some reason, their body parts that no one really wanted to see, were put out on display like it was a freakshow….

I guess Snooki proves my theory that the Mechanical bull is for fat and sloppy being thrown around like the barnyard animals on their way to the slaughthouse….and her upskirt is really just her bathing suit…but when it comes to Snooki, it doesn’t really matter because it’s all disgusting…

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