I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the stepNEWS Category

2011

18

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here is the latest stepNEWS….news that is on the news but that isn’t news because it doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of the world…but it does showcase the real idiots of the world…or at least of America and that’s always a good time…I guess…

Police Officer Attacked by Cow
A Hickory Creek police officer is out of the hospital after getting attacked by a cow.

Man Bites Dog, Sues Police
A 33-year-old man who bit back after he was caught by a Phoenix police dog is suing police.

Pre-Teen Condom Site Causes Furor
Philadelphia’s new campaign to educate young teens on the dangers of sexual activity has sparked some hot debate around town.

Caught on Tape: Mom Has Child Steal Purse
A shocking case out of Wilmington, Del., shows a child forced to steal and it was all caught on video.

Houston Dad Accused of Letting Baby Eat Pot

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

15

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here is the news that isn’t really news…but that I know you want to know about…because you think it intellectualizes your masturbation…keeps you up to speed on useless idiots doing useless things that end up on local TV…as you click on tranny porn link….and by you I mean me…as I write this site to myself and not to the one or two perverts who end up here from searching “Dick Farts” on google…yes it amazes me that half my traffic is refered by google from Dick-Fart…..that is the real stepNEWS….

Another toddler given sangria, not juice
A 2-year-old boy was accidentally served sangria instead of orange juice at a central Florida Olive Garden and was taken to the hospital.

Online Dating and Sex Predator Risks
A southern California woman says the man she met through match.com raped her. After a second date with the man, he allegedly followed her home, walked into her apartment and raped her.

Child Takes Pot to School, Mom Arrested
A mother is out of jail Thursday night after marijuana was found in her daughter’s book bag at a daycare in Norcross. Ten bags of marijuana were found in the 5-year-old girl’s bag as she was boarding the school bus.

German President Pelted With Eggs
German President Christian Wulff shrugged off an egg attack by a lone assailant Thursday, saying it was the price of having the common touch.

Pastor accused of having sex with minor
The youth pastor at a church in Brooksville was arrested Tuesday and is accused of having consensual sex with a 17-year-old girl, according to the Brooksville police.

Fetish Website Paid For Beatings
A fetish site is facing a lawsuit after paying homeless men as little as $25 to be videotaped while women whipped and punched them, leaving them with bruises, a dislocated jaw and broken ribs, The St Petersburg Times reported Tuesday.

Dude Goes To Jail and Is Listed as a Sex Offender for a Youtube Video – What a Fucking Joke….America is So Backwards….It’s a Fucking Joke….

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

13

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s some news that isn’t really news….I looked around to find some better shit but had no luck….so this is as good as it gets….which is okay because you don’t really deserve better…not that there is a you…we’re in this alone…and by we I mean me….

Teacher Accused of Throwing Shoe
A DeKalb County school teacher is in hot water Tuesday night after allegedly throwing a shoe at a student. Now the boy’s mother is considering legal action against the district

This Victoria’s Secret Photoshop Fail was pretty hysterical too…. Candice Swanepoel Looks Likea Monster …..but that’s not really random news is it…

Fuck I suck at the internet…

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

12

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s some news that isn’t news to start your day. If anything it’s just news to remind you how unfair life is cuz when you were in high school the only lap dances you were getting were from your foster mother who only was a foster mother cuz it paid and sometimes cuz it satisfied her sexual needs cuz we were giving no choice…which would have been nice…had she not been really fat white trash who didn’t shower…I mean maybe she’s the reason I got a taste for pig women, cuz trust me I had a fucking taste, more that I’d ever like to admit…cuz her lap dances were more face dances…the kind that makes most men gay and in therapy their whole life….while letting it all out on the internet after getting the same mouth rape from my obese wife is my therapy…it’s like groundhog day…i keep reliving and reliving those days when I was 12 and “come lick the lollipop” meant something that didn’t taste like candy, but more like feces, sweat and piss…Good times…

Classroom Searched After Teacher Arrest
Federal ICE agents raided an Alexandria elementary school Monday, searching the classroom of a fourth grade teacher arrested last week on child pornography charges.

Video of DeKalb Home Invasion Released
Four men force their way into a businessman’s Stone Mountain home. The victim released home surveillance video Monday in hopes of catching the perpetrators.

Teacher Used Lap Dancers In Classroom
A LaSalle University professor is the subject of a school investigation after claims that he hired strippers to take part in a symposium, during which he and students received lap dances.

Police: Woman beat boy over ‘F’
A woman accused of beating a young relative for getting an F on his report card was in court Monday.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

11

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Sometimes one news that isn’t news story is enough to satisfy my news that isn’t news needs…

A big scare for an Oak Park family, their toddler was accidentally served alcohol in a kids meal at Applebee’s. After a few swigs from his sippy cup, the 15-month-old boy needed a ride to the hospital.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

08

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s some Friday morning News that isn’t really news…I mean except for the Cop stopping the Squirrel with pepper spray…I mean that shit’s gotta go international…fuck natural disasters and wars in Arab countries over oil…and general poverty and the fall of America as China takes over….let’s focus on squirrels….and people getting superglued to Walmart toilets…and cops abusing their power to expose themselves to teen sluts…amazing…Shit so good, why do we need the other news..

Allen Iverson Goes on Rant After Traffic Stop
Atlanta police say basketball superstar Allen Iverson went on a profanity filled rant when an Atlanta officer impounded his Lamborghini.

Cop Stops Squirrel with Pepper Spray
While the YouTube video of a police officer using pepper spray on a baby squirrel has shocked some, the Mesquite Police Department is defending the officer’s actions.

Cops: Man Killed Victim to Fake Death
Fort Worth investigators said a convicted child molester murdered a man in an attempt to fake his own death to avoid prison time on a new sexual assault charge.

Teacher Charged in Student Relationship
Detectives have taken a teacher with the Fort Bend Independent School District into custody following an investigation by the Fort Bend County Sheriff’s Office.

Cops: Man exposed self to girl
QUINCY – A Fitchburg man is facing charges after police say he exposed himself to a 15-year-old Quincy girl outside the Quincy Center MBTA station.

MD man superglued to Walmart toilet
A Maryland man had to scream for help after getting super glued to a toilet inside a Walmart and an employee had to call 911 for help.

Student stole TVs to pay for prom
A high school senior looking for money to help with prom expenses wound up in jail instead.

BONUS – China’s Releasing Some 3D Porn…Soon you won’t even need real women..I think we already have that here….

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

07

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

I think the biggest news of the day is that I’m 5000 votes away from being first in a major modeling contest …..a contest I entered in as a joke…you see cuz I think male models are fruity at best, and figured I should teach them the power of the internet and a good network of supporters who think fashion needs more masked fat dudes…and less twinky queers….

I also thought it was funny to show all the bitches who send me hate mail for calling Kim Kardashian fat, that I’m model material too, so it comes from a industry perspective and not from a bitter fat man who can’t get laid….

I also thought it was funny cuz FORD MODELS blocked me on twitter for laughing at them and their irrelevance in a fake job, in a industry….seriously, what the fuck is a modeling agency? A pimp for bitches who don’t fuck….so winning their contest would be like the ultimate laugh…

I am sure they will disqualify me….and I’m okay with that…cuz I know the truth…and I’ve already won…

I guess the other stepNEWS is good too, I mean if you like news that isn’t news, but that made the news cuz local news is hysterical, especially when from Vermont…and they’re reporting a maple syrup shortage or some shit… cuz a raccoon got into the main supply…but unfortunately, we don’t have that clip…we just have dick clits.

Children suspended over porn at school
Lynn Rupp says her 8-year-old son should be in school at Cheney Elementary, but instead he’s at home. Lynn says her son viewed pornography while in class, after he says another boy pulled it up from online.

Pedophile book’s author gets probation
The man who wrote a book on how to molest children gets his punishment: Probation. Now free from jail, he said he would not rule out writing another book.

Worker for Presidential candidate Pawlenty Found Drunk in Iowa Yard
A Tim Pawlenty campaign worker found drunk and knocking on the back door of an Iowa home early Wednesday morning said he made a “serious mistake” that “will never happen again.”

Sex offender arrested without pants
KINGSTON – A Level 3 sex offender took off his pants and walked around a store in the Independence Mall wearing only a shirt and see-through underwear, police said.

Woman Arrested after Restaurant Brawl
Some low blows at an upscale restaurant land a 31-year-old woman in police custody. According to authorities, Danielle Taylor of Kimball was arrested Monday at the Capital Grille at the Somerset Collection in Troy.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

06

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

News that isn’t news but that I am glad that happened – cuz it makes me laugh and feel good about not being on the local news for being an idiot again…amazing…

Caught on Tape: McDonald’s manager punches teen employee

Texas Residents Oppose Adult Store
Residents of Bee Cave are upset at the prospect of Planet K, an adult gift shop and smoke shop opening in their community.

Cops Accused of Sexual Misconduct ID’d
Two Chicago police officers accused of sexually assaulting a woman last week while on duty — partners working in the 23rd District — were arrested after the incident, but have not been charged.

Police: Mom Hits Daughter With Car
Police say this woman struck her 17-year-old daughter with her vehicle following a heated argument.

Students OD on cold medicine
MELROSE – In Melrose, one Middle School student and one High School student had to be taken to the hospital to have their stomachs pumped after overdosing on cold medication to get high.

Car plunges six floors in Orlando
A car fell from the sixth floor of a parking garage with the driver inside.

Man broke into homes during funerals
BROCKTON – A Bridgewater man who admitted to bringing his 4 year-old with him while breaking into houses is now accused of ripping off people who were in mourning.

Beer increases odds of stomach cancer
It looks like the harder you hit the keg, the more you raise your chance of developing stomach cancer.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

05

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

I want to be the premiere source of the news no one wants or cares about…I’ve always had some level of ambition, like I knew I wanted a legacy, but I never wanted to responsibility of actually doing something meaninful, intelligent or that matters, so don’t get in the way of my stepNEWS reporter dreams…..

Coach resigns after porn incident
A Wellesley high school volleyball coach steps down after reportedly showing pornography to students during a practice last week.

Athletic Director Arrested, Charged
The Athletic Director for Southern University in Baton Rouge, LA has been arrested in Houston on a misdemeanor Prostitution charge.

Controversial site expands to Brown
PROVIDENCE – A controversial new website is going online today at a Rhode Island university.

Famous Art Work of Topless Women Attacked at DC Gallery
A famous work of art was attacked at the National Gallery

Toronto’s Slut Walk 2011 – I shoulda been there – but it wasn’t slutty enough….

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

04

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s the stepNEWS that you’re probably not interested in, but should be cuz this is the world that we’re living in motherfuckers, you should know about this stuff, cuz CNN is too busy promoting Anderson Cooper’s biceps in tight shirts for the gays to really delve into what matters, like Kiddie Porn Pastors, Naked people found in stores, Charlie Sheen’s stage show bombing, cuz Charlie Sheen fucking sucks and is boring now and pot brownies at Prom and Drunk Teachers in class…..you know the thread that makes up the fabric of our lives…the real important shit you can’t live as a normal member of society not knowing….In the event you didn’t notice, I’m kinda playing this shit up a little…FOLLOW ME

Hernando Pastor Charged with Child Porn
A Desoto County preacher has been charged with possession of child porn. Eddie Prince of Oak Grove Baptist Church in Hernando was arrested at his home on Friday.

Charlie Sheen Booed Heavily In Detroit
Fans react to the debut of Charlie Sheen’s live-tour at Detroit’s Fox Theater. “It was awful” says one fan, who left the theatre before the show ended. He was not alone in his opinion and boos were commonplace.

Prom shut down over pot brownie concerns
NORTH ANDOVER – The North Andover High School Junior Prom was shut down early on Friday night over concerns related to pot-laced brownies.

Bondage Club Murder Suspect in Court
David Edward Albert is facing murder, arson and animal cruelty charges. Authorities say Albert shot and killed his former boss, a dog, and then set the club on fire after being fired.

Naked Man Found in Store’s Bathroom
Police arrested a man after he gave employees at a valley dollar store a big shock.

Teacher appeared drunk in classroom
WEST NEWBURY – An eighth-grade teacher who was removed from her classroom last week appeared drunk to school officials and asked one student how it would feel “to have a bullet in his head,” The Eagle Tribune reported, citing police reports released yesterday.

Depositions in Transgender Widow Case
There are new developments in the controversial case of a transgender widow.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

31

Mar

Obese Man Welded to Chair for 2 Years of the Day

No. Despite popular belief, this story wasn’t about me. You can stop sending your emails in.

I’m not welded to a chair. I am just married to one and never get off my fat ass and sure sometimes there’s piss and shit all over this bitch from laziness and eagerness to get you the latest drunkenstepfather post…but I have the ability to get up if I really have to. I just don’t really like doing it….

That’s all I have to say about that. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

30

Mar

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s the post I never understand why I do…..I mean every post is a minute of “What the fuck am I doing” and “how is this my life” and “fuck this is a waste of time”….but this one doesn’t even have tits in it. What’s up with that? FOLLOW ME

Caught on Tape: Plane crashes into water in Florida
A landing attempt goes horribly wrong in Florida and it’s all caught on camera.

Special Report: Sex Slaves in Chicago
Some might think sex trafficking is something that just happens in other countries. It’s a growing epidemic in the city of Chicago.

College weighs fragrance ban on campus
FRAMINGHAM – For most students at Framingham State University, wearing perfume is a regular part of life. So when students found out the university is considering banning all fragrances, there was outrage and disbelief.

Parent: Breast-Feeding Doll is Weird
A breast-feeding baby doll. It may be a toy, but the doll is sparking real controversy.

Watch a penguin poop in the studio during a live TV segment

Fake Facebook girlfriend
Guys, ever wish you could make an ex jealous on Facebook? Or fool your friends into thinking you’re in a happy, committed, relationship?

Man arraigned on kidnapping, assault
A member of the Salem, N.H., planning board is being arraigned on charges he kidnapped and raped a woman he met through a Craigslist ad.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

30

Mar

stepNEWS of the Day

I still haven’t figured out what this daily post isn’t the only reason people come visit this site. It’s got everything you’d want out of a post….idiots, perverts, insanity, entertainment, laughs, actions that make us question the human condition, yet understand why we are all doomed…oh but it doesn’t have nipple, pussy slips, or tight pants on hot ass, so I get it…you’re only using me for my body not my brain…you pigs….FOLLOW ME

Caught on Tape: Man Charged for Knock-out Punch
Police in Bloomsburg have filed charges against the man who delivered a knock-out punch during Saint Patrick’s Day celebrations.

The Escort: Risque Play Opens in LA
“The Escort”, a play by Emmy-winning playwright Jane Anderson, opened in previews at the Geffen Playhouse on Tuesday night. If you haven’t heard much about it, there could be a reason.

Crossing guard says he was assaulted
Osceola County Sheriff’s have deputies arrested a corrections officer following an altercation with a crossing guard.

Nasty Fight Ends School Hockey Game
A championship hockey game between Keller High School and Arlington Martin High School is getting a great deal of attention for the violent fight at the end of the game.

Dallas Doctor Charged in Smoking Rage Attack
A Dallas physician is accused of trying to run over someone he allegedly saw smoking near his car.

Police: Man Used Xbox to Lure Girls
A 20-year-old Saline, Mich. man is accused of using his Xbox 360 video game system as a means to meet and lure middle school girls for sex.

Caught on Tape: SUV drives into flower shop
One Arizona flower shop is temporarily closed after a bad delivery…a delivery of an SUV right into the store that is.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

29

Mar

stepNEWS of the Day

stepNEWS that isn’t news…..Admit you’re excited to skip this post….even though it is my absolute favorite of posts ever invented or put on the motherfucking internet you motherfuckers who have no taste or appreciation for the finer real life smut in life…FOLLOW ME

Rape charges follow online meeting
Pasco County detectives have arrested a man for rape. They say he met his victim online through an internet dating service.

Mom: Teacher told kids to tape mouths
A Polk County mom is outraged over what her son’s fourth grade teacher supposedly did last week, and she wants him fired.

Cops: Woman had cocaine in diaper
An East Boston woman is being held on $250,000 bail after law enforcement stopped her at Logan International Airport with more than 1,000 grams of cocaine in a “diaper-like” garment, state police said.

Church Attendance Linked to Obesity
Many believe church is good for the soul, but new research shows it may not be good for the waistline. The study shows people who attend worship services regularly are 50 percent more likely to become obese.

Parents Offended by Padded Bikini Top
Many retailers are featuring their 2011 swimsuit line, but one particular store has parents across the country disgusted and enraged.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

28

Mar

stepNEWS of the Day

Here is the news that isn’t the news to keep you informed about things that don’t really matter, but that can be funny, if you’re not the 12 year old getting raped by the clown….scroll down and see how genius I tie things together…I’m a machine peple. A sloppy booze soaked confused perverted machine.

Women Accidentally Shoot Selves
Two women are suspected of a drive-by shooting Friday night – and they actually ended up shooting themselves!

Clown Arrested in 2002 Rape of Girl
A professional clown suspected of kidnapping and raping a 12-year-old girl in Fullerton nine years ago while he was in costume was arrested today.

Teen Boy-Woman Affair Started in Church
An observant mother … worried about changes in her teenage son’s behavior… discovers something worse than she ever expected. Her 15-year-old son had met a girl at church. They started exchanging text messages and videos. That’s not that unusual. But what if the girl is 20 and the images of the two are graphic?

Pole Dancing for Jesus Goes Global
It’s a story we first brought you last week. Who knew that a small business in Old Town Spring would make headlines across the country?

Posted in:stepNEWS