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Archive for the stepNEWS Category

2011

17

May

stepNEWS of the Day

I’m like Peter Jennings or that gay guy from the morning show in this bitch, or Barbara Walters but with a smaller dick. It’s like I’m a fucking investigative journalist, something I always knew I was good at when it came to scoping out weird porn, but now it is a skill I’ve brought to the mainstream, even though I don’t actually actively search for the stepNEWS, they are just mailed into me, but I’m allowed to pretend I work and have skills, it is important for my low self esteem and self worth….

FL Teen says she was attacked at school
Lake Mary High School student Christina Martinez says she was attacked by another teenager nearly two weeks ago

Cops Probe Alleged Plot To Sicken Kids
Police in suburban Philadelphia are investigating an alleged plot to sicken children on a school trip and then sue for damages.

Relaxation brownies, perfectly legal
There are brownies out there that promise to make you feel very mellow — but the ingredients aren’t what you might think.

Vatican releases new abuse directive
VATICAN CITY – The Vatican is coming under heavy criticism after releasing new directives about how to handle clergy sex abuse.

Push to ban sex at home during divorce
BOSTON – A new bill on Beacon Hill would ban parents from engaging in sexual relationships within the home until their divorces are final.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

16

May

stepNEWS of the Day

You know – I make fun of these idiots on the stepNEWS, but I never take the time to really appreciate what they do to get on the news, like the dude who told his employers that his wife had cancer and they paid him 7,000 dollars, before his cunt wife ratted him out, I mean shit, that plan was almost genius, but I guess the key word is genius, and I guess this really just shows us the fine line between half retarded and being smart…. this is the stepNEWS…we’re not here for smarts…I am here to celebrate retardism….

Man lied about wife dying from cancer
Police say a Greenville, N.H. main deceived his employer of thousands of dollars under the guise that his wife was dying of cancer.

Man Accused of Burning Ex Stays in Jail
The man accused of setting his ex-girlfriend on fire made a court appearance Thursday morning. Cobb County police say 25-year old Morgan Yarbrough of Powder Springs surrendered Wednesday after spending hours on the run.

Teacher accused of stealing markers
34-year-old Carl Howard, a Florida teacher, was caught shoplifting $800 worth of art markers.

Pornography Found In Bin Laden Hideout
U.S. officials say a stash of pornography was found in Osama bin Laden’s Pakistan hideout raided by Navy Seals.

Tattoo Artist Faces Child Sex Charges
A southeastern Pennsylvania man accused of trading a tattoo for sex with an underage girl now faces sex charges involving more than a dozen other children as young as 4 years old, many of them the children of friends and girlfriends.

Woman run over by beach patrol
A woman was run over by a Volusia County Beach Patrol vehicle Friday morning at Daytona Beach.

One on one with Katy Perry’s parents
Their daughter is living a teenage dream with fireworks and they are in central Florida to bring their Evangelist message to teens and parents.

Caught on Tape: Ox stuck in clothing store, breaks out

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

13

May

stepNEWS of the Day

stepNEWS to start the day make you a more informed chronic masturbating redneck hick with a grade school education and a stray dog you like to fuck when no one’s looking…

I’m making the world a more informed place…..one idiot at a time…

Police: Man stabbed woman over milk
A Daytona Beach man is facing a charge of aggravated battery after stabbing a woman for not purchasing the type of milk he is accustomed to drinking.

Burger King boots blind woman, guide dog
Helen Arnold says she was the one grilled by an employee, after going inside with her guide dog Troy Serves her Right for being blind….

School sexting investigation draws ire
The issue of teenagers sexting each other isn’t a new problem, but the way one school is handling it is. This is the first time we’ve seen a school take the cells phones and conduct their own investigation and by investigation I mean jerk off to their students conference

Near-riot breaks out at Odd Future album signing
A police officer was taken to the hospital and a huge crowd of fans was dispersed from a CD signing by the biggest thing in hipster rap Tyler, the Creator.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

12

May

stepNEWS of the Day

The stepNEWS is fucking amazing…but not as amazing as the dude who stripped down naked talking craziness and chased people in the subway….he’s one of those “shoulda been me” motherfuckers…I coulda done that with my eyes closed and got all the glory….but instead I just sat here….on my soiled couch naked and talking craziness…just goes to show what a little ambition and drive can do for a talent…it can land you on TV…Amazing

Caught on Tape: Victim beats, chases carjacker
The victim was in his truck at a drive through when another man walked up, then threatened and hit him with a stic

Naked man’s racial rant caught on tape
Cameras capture a bizarre scene on the New York City subway.

Dad Charged with Beating His Daughter
He sat silent in court as he was charged with beating his own daughter so badly her face was no longer recognizable. The 52-year-old Oxford man is being held on $2-million bond after allegedly assaulting her with a bat.

Judge fines potential juror $450
Judge Belvin Perry started the afternoon session by fining prospective juror Jonathan Green in contempt of court after he was told that during the lunch break Green had engaged a reporter with the purpose of trying to get out of jury duty

Man Sets Fire to Woman at Gas Station
Cobb County police are looking for a man who they say doused his former girlfriend with gasoline and set her on fire. It happened at a Kennesaw gas station off of Barrett Parkway early Wednesday morning.

Deputy Accused of Having Sex With Teen
Another San Bernardino County Sheriff’s deputy was jailed for allegedly having sex with a teen girl in the department’s youth Explorer Program, prompting the suspension of a portion of the program.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

11

May

stepNEWS of the Day

I know the night wasn’t entirely where I wanted it to be last night, because I am not posting video clips from the local news starring me….I don’t think that in all my insane drunken rages of stupidity that I’ve ever ended up on the local news and that’s kinda bumming me out….I guess I’m more of the drunken idiot who leaves the raping for the rapists who is more into wallowing in the rejection and questionning where I went wrong…Maybe my drunken rages are better suited for Sally Jesse Raphael…provided she’s not dead….because I like self destructing slowly to dance music better than breaking laws….but these idiots aren’t as considerate in their stupidity….

Sex-predator sting yields 22 arrests
Twenty-two men were arrested and charged in a Polk County sex-predator sting.

Woman Arrested After Truck Pursuit
Authorities arrested a woman who led them on a freeway chase Tuesday afternoon in an apparently stolen flatbed truck. Watch the police pursuit video inside the story. The fun starts at the 2:15 mark.

Man arrested for posing as school nurse
A Lake County man is facing a number of charges after deputies say he took a dead man’s nursing license and altered it for his own use to work as a school nurse.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

10

May

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s some news….it may not be the best news…the most relevant news…the most life changing news…it may not even be funny or ironic or interesting enough to watch…but that’s what makes it the stepNEWS….

Hateful Posts Hit Va Business’ Facebook
Racist rants, images and videos are starting to overtake a Facebook page created by a Northern Virginia hair care business with an African American customer base.

Priest Says He Lied About Being SEAL
A priest in central Pennsylvania and the region’s leading newspaper are embarrassed by apparent false claims that the priest served in the elite Navy SEALs program.

Developer faces rape, cocaine charges
QUINCY – One of Quincy’s wealthiest and most influential developers will face a judge in connection with child rape and drug trafficking charges.

Face Transplant Recipient Speaks
The nation’s first full face transplant recipient said the first thing his young daughter said to him when she saw him after the operation was “Daddy, you’re so handsome.”

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

09

May

stepNEWS of the Day

It turns out that even if I ignore the news, stupid shit still happens. It’s like turning a blind eye to retards, not actual retards, but people who act like actual retards, but are accepted in society as our equals, will continue to go on…It’s like the number one American natural resource or export….you stupid, ignorant, uneducated, inbred, Walmart shopping, hicks….no offense…cuz trust me, I know there’s idiots everywhere…it’s an international thing…how exclusive…

Caught on Tape: Racehorse jumps into crowd
Two people have suspected serious spinal injuries after a horse rampaged through a crowd of spectators at a race meeting in Australia, the Herald Sun reported Thursday.

Nobody cared about this woman
A 65-year-old woman training for a half marathon fell and was seriously hurt along a busy road in Garland. Despite her obvious trama, no one stopped to help her for some time.

‘SlutWalks’ Sends Provocative Message
This social movement really gets around.

Man Arrested In Craigslist Rent Scam
A man named Samuel Ferraro was in police custody Friday night in connection with what they say is a Craigslist scheme.

Beating Near Old City Bar Caught On Tape
Cameras were rolling when a group of people beat up a man outside a Philadelphia bar.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

06

May

stepNEWS of the Day

One person in the week I didn’t post the stepNEWS asked me where the stepNEWS was. One other person told me the were glad it was gone. And the other 10 million people a day who visit this amazing site, didn’t even notice it was missing….So I brought it back for them.

Woman still jailed on sex noises charge
Ellen Beth Wachs is in the Polk County Jail on no bond. Wednesday, her attorney said she is there because, as an outspoken atheist, local law enforcement sees her as a thorn in their side.

Caught on Tape: Officer Tackles Teenage Girl
An officer is under investigation for using excessive force after video is posted of him pushing a teenage girl against a wall.

62yo Man Accused of Molesting Children
Authorities say a Maricopa man has been arrested for the alleged child molestation of two juveniles, occurring between 2010 and 2011.

Volunteer Allegedly Touched Boy
A volunteer at Lakewood Church has been charged with “indecency with a child” after allegations that he touched a boy inappropriately, according to court documents

Mom: ‘I Lost My Son Because I’m Gay’
It’s the latest twist in a father-and-son love triangle that ended in murder. Would a dose of tolerance have headed off a horrible killing?

Passenger Says She Was Groped on Metro
Fox 5 spoke with a bus passenger who says sometime after 8 p.m. on Tuesday night she got on a bus heading to her home in Silver Spring where she was sexually assaulted.

Lockheed Martin Workers Caught Drinking In Work Parking Lot
For most of us a lunch break means grabbing a salad or a maybe a burger. But for some Lockheed Martin workers, lunch time has taken on a whole new meaning.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

25

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

As far as I’m concerned, it’s Easter Monday and you religious freaks should be out nailing yourself to crosses to experience Christ’s plight as the worlds first billionaire entrepreneur….I mean before him you needed royal blood or at least a ship to trade spices with China to be rich, but motherfucker instead created his own religion, which was the Entertainment of the time, making him the first Oprah/Howard Stern/whoever else is a billionaire off brainwashing their followers….

You should not be watching internet video clips…but here is the latest news…anyway…

Police: Teacher Shoved Child’s Head
A 27-year-old teacher allegedly bashed the head of his partner’s daughter because she wouldn’t let him take a nap — leaving bruises that lasted for weeks.

Prosecutors: Man Assaulted Coma Patient
A local man showed no remorse after admitting to raping a woman in coma inside her room at a nursing home, prosecutors say.

Man shoved baby wipe down baby’s throat – Better a Baby Wipe Thank His Genitals….
A Salem man was arrested for shoving a baby wipe down a baby’s throat and then throwing the child across the room, Essex district attorney’s spokesman Steve O’Connell said.

Murder witnessed over webcam
TORONTO – An exchange student from China was attacked and killed in Canada, and it was all witnessed a world away.

Tattoo Artist Gets 7.5 Yrs in Sex Case
A valley man accused of trading sex for tattoos was sentenced to 7.5 years in prison.

Umbrella mistaken for gun at mall
State police say no weapon was found inside the Burlington Mall. There were reports that a man with a gun was spotted inside the Nordstrom, but it turned out to be an umbrella.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

19

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

I biggest stepNEWS is that Jenny McCarthy answered me on twitter after mocking her uterus for giving autism….but I guess that’s really not news at all….maybe the fact that telling teen girls smoking is bad in sweat pants with an erection is ineffective and illegal is stepNEWS….or getting drunk at making friends on the internet at 4 am is…only to wake up at noon not knowing or understanding why you’re a broke ass joke…or maybe the real news is that the bitch from Scream 4 who’s pics I posted yesterday closed down her facebook cuz of me…..

I don’t know anymore…but here’s what my news editor in cheif sent me…

Adult Store Sparks More Controversy
There is more controversy for a Manassas store that sells lingerie and pornographic movies. KK’s Temptations has only been open for about six months, but some City Council members are concerned about the image it is portraying and has launched an expensive study to look into it.

Match.com to check sex offender registry
Online dating site Match.com says it will begin screening its users against the national sex offender registry. Because some bitch named Carole Markin, who is some Harvard educated Film Producer got raped from some 6 time offender she met, reminding that the internet is full of crazies…

A tornado stole this guys hamburger…

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

18

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here is the latest stepNEWS….news that is on the news but that isn’t news because it doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of the world…but it does showcase the real idiots of the world…or at least of America and that’s always a good time…I guess…

Police Officer Attacked by Cow
A Hickory Creek police officer is out of the hospital after getting attacked by a cow.

Man Bites Dog, Sues Police
A 33-year-old man who bit back after he was caught by a Phoenix police dog is suing police.

Pre-Teen Condom Site Causes Furor
Philadelphia’s new campaign to educate young teens on the dangers of sexual activity has sparked some hot debate around town.

Caught on Tape: Mom Has Child Steal Purse
A shocking case out of Wilmington, Del., shows a child forced to steal and it was all caught on video.

Houston Dad Accused of Letting Baby Eat Pot

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

15

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here is the news that isn’t really news…but that I know you want to know about…because you think it intellectualizes your masturbation…keeps you up to speed on useless idiots doing useless things that end up on local TV…as you click on tranny porn link….and by you I mean me…as I write this site to myself and not to the one or two perverts who end up here from searching “Dick Farts” on google…yes it amazes me that half my traffic is refered by google from Dick-Fart…..that is the real stepNEWS….

Another toddler given sangria, not juice
A 2-year-old boy was accidentally served sangria instead of orange juice at a central Florida Olive Garden and was taken to the hospital.

Online Dating and Sex Predator Risks
A southern California woman says the man she met through match.com raped her. After a second date with the man, he allegedly followed her home, walked into her apartment and raped her.

Child Takes Pot to School, Mom Arrested
A mother is out of jail Thursday night after marijuana was found in her daughter’s book bag at a daycare in Norcross. Ten bags of marijuana were found in the 5-year-old girl’s bag as she was boarding the school bus.

German President Pelted With Eggs
German President Christian Wulff shrugged off an egg attack by a lone assailant Thursday, saying it was the price of having the common touch.

Pastor accused of having sex with minor
The youth pastor at a church in Brooksville was arrested Tuesday and is accused of having consensual sex with a 17-year-old girl, according to the Brooksville police.

Fetish Website Paid For Beatings
A fetish site is facing a lawsuit after paying homeless men as little as $25 to be videotaped while women whipped and punched them, leaving them with bruises, a dislocated jaw and broken ribs, The St Petersburg Times reported Tuesday.

Dude Goes To Jail and Is Listed as a Sex Offender for a Youtube Video – What a Fucking Joke….America is So Backwards….It’s a Fucking Joke….

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

13

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s some news that isn’t really news….I looked around to find some better shit but had no luck….so this is as good as it gets….which is okay because you don’t really deserve better…not that there is a you…we’re in this alone…and by we I mean me….

Teacher Accused of Throwing Shoe
A DeKalb County school teacher is in hot water Tuesday night after allegedly throwing a shoe at a student. Now the boy’s mother is considering legal action against the district

This Victoria’s Secret Photoshop Fail was pretty hysterical too…. Candice Swanepoel Looks Likea Monster …..but that’s not really random news is it…

Fuck I suck at the internet…

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

12

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s some news that isn’t news to start your day. If anything it’s just news to remind you how unfair life is cuz when you were in high school the only lap dances you were getting were from your foster mother who only was a foster mother cuz it paid and sometimes cuz it satisfied her sexual needs cuz we were giving no choice…which would have been nice…had she not been really fat white trash who didn’t shower…I mean maybe she’s the reason I got a taste for pig women, cuz trust me I had a fucking taste, more that I’d ever like to admit…cuz her lap dances were more face dances…the kind that makes most men gay and in therapy their whole life….while letting it all out on the internet after getting the same mouth rape from my obese wife is my therapy…it’s like groundhog day…i keep reliving and reliving those days when I was 12 and “come lick the lollipop” meant something that didn’t taste like candy, but more like feces, sweat and piss…Good times…

Classroom Searched After Teacher Arrest
Federal ICE agents raided an Alexandria elementary school Monday, searching the classroom of a fourth grade teacher arrested last week on child pornography charges.

Video of DeKalb Home Invasion Released
Four men force their way into a businessman’s Stone Mountain home. The victim released home surveillance video Monday in hopes of catching the perpetrators.

Teacher Used Lap Dancers In Classroom
A LaSalle University professor is the subject of a school investigation after claims that he hired strippers to take part in a symposium, during which he and students received lap dances.

Police: Woman beat boy over ‘F’
A woman accused of beating a young relative for getting an F on his report card was in court Monday.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

11

Apr

stepNEWS of the Day

Sometimes one news that isn’t news story is enough to satisfy my news that isn’t news needs…

A big scare for an Oak Park family, their toddler was accidentally served alcohol in a kids meal at Applebee’s. After a few swigs from his sippy cup, the 15-month-old boy needed a ride to the hospital.

Posted in:stepNEWS