Fergie performed on the Today Show today in a pair of leather pants. She ended up grinding the stage, suggestively went down on her guitar player, did a booty shake and the whole performance looked like watching a ghetto stripshow in too many clothes. I guess she learnt this shit when she was a meth addict and needed to make some extra money at stag parties, you know dudes would pay top dollar to see any Disney slut all jacked on drugs and getting naked in their hotel suite.

The sex on stage wasn’t what made Fergie’s performance funny, the fact that she was performing for a group of middle school kids who were probably on their grad trip to NYC is what made it funny. Shit’s on Daytime TV and it looks more like I am watching a behind the scenes DVD on her life at Disney when dirty old men producers made her and her co-star Mika get it on in his office in exchange for promises of renewing that shit another year.

I am not a parent and I figure that having my 10 year old daughter doing this shit in the park with her friends is a bad thing. I went to a concert twice last year, one was a free thing in a park and the other was a free ticket to Gwen Stefani and Akon and at both shows, there were kids around me grinding up against each other like they were fucking and it made me uncomfortable, especially at the Akon show when he sang his “I wanna Fuck You” song and they were singing along, but the creepy dude in the trench coat and sweat pants behind me seemed to like it enough to start jerking off to the scene before security took him out. So at least one person approves and I guess it’s never too early to learn about the birds and the bees, maybe in 8 years you’ll be getting down to some of these girls and they’ll be like slamming a 35 year old divorcee with a horny vagina and with years of fucking experience, because they all lost their virginity at 12 and their anal virginity at 12 and a half. It’s a new scary generation and I am happy that I am not a father because even the Today Show is pornographic.

Here are the videos of her in action.

Posted in:Fergie|Today Show