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Archive for the Zoo Weekly Category

2009

05

Jan

Women Have Orgasms During Childbirth of the Day

So there’s a report that women have orgasms when giving birth, at least they interviewed some weird hippie chick who is obviously a modern dancer and the kind of girl who probably has orgasms walking or crossing her legs, because she’s so in tune with her body or something equally obnoxious that only girls with hairy bushes really understand while giving natural water birth, who claims she came giving birth, and there are a bunch of crazy bitches who agree that the passing of a watermelon through their cunts is pleasurable and the whole thing is kinda funny considering that orgasmic moment for the mom may be the last one, because for the rest of their marriage, their husbands’ orgasms will happen thinking about their wife before the day when the vagina they married was a little less mangled or most likely thinking of hotter, younger girls they can’t have. Good Times.

Posted in:Birth|Orgasms|women|Zoe Kravitz|Zoey Zane|Zoo Weekly

2008

19

Feb

Zoo Girls are Nude and Rude of the Day

Zoo Weekly consistently brings the goods when it comes to slutty Glamour models undressed or dressed half naked. They pretty destroy the American competition because they actually show some fuckin’ tit.

I guess you’re not really the home of the free, when your corporations are so fucking conservative that they won’t sponsor anything with a tit on it, even though those executives pay strippers ten dollars a dance to touch their tits pretty much every time they go away on business.

That’s not even going into the creepy shit those powerful executives do with their wives and their mistresses behind closed doors while always maintaining a clean cut image to make the psycho Christians and uptight WASPS buy their shit, because having an ad next to a picture of a tit or showing a little more tit on network TV would be so fucking bad, considering we all fuck and like fucking.

What I don’t understand is why CSI is on every night, showing people murdered and how they were murdered, with all kinds of dead bodies and blood and shit, but the second someone shows a little ass the FCC is on their ass with a million dollar fine.

It is really fucking crazy, but the good thing is that the UK give dudes what they want without labeling it porn, because let’s face it, we all like tits, except for the gay dudes, but they have Men’s Health to get them through their lonely nights that are a lot less lonely than your lonely nights, because gays like to fuck as much as you like to fuck, so they always find cock all while you’re out trying to convince a girl to get with you on Facebook…..maybe you should re-evaluate your lifestyle.

If you decided you still like tits then check out the 30 Pictures of Zoo Girls Nude and Rude
GO

Posted in:Nude|Zoo Weekly