If I was a girl, I’d want to have my unwanted baby in the Walmart bathroom…..but I’m just a guy….who has to be happy fucking girls who look like they would have their unwanted baby in the Walmart bathroom, and you know what, that works for me.

It’s the long weekend in canada, I should try to get someone pregnancy, or at least get their tits pregnant….with my mouth….and random household objects.

I am not a porn site.

Here are some stepLINKS….

If you follow DrunkenStepfather at all…and I am going to assume you do…because you are reading this with one hand down your pants…which would otherwise be a gay as fuck experience, but for us it’s our everyday….

You will know that we have stepGIRLS who model our shirts, take pics for us, and who are our girls we support in everyway….when we are lucky, they let us give them back massages…or they have sideline business…

Well one of our recent recruits….and in my opinion…one of our best girls….happens to be a cam girl on Cam Girl On CamWithHer…..because we like when our girls moonlight getting naked…

CamWithHer isn’t your normal cam site. It only features high end models that are least 9/10 that you can communicate with….it’s how we got to know Carmen in ways we never knew her before…

This is a look into her amazing…amazing…busty performance….show your support, she’s part of our stepfamily…and she’s amazing…

Here are some of the busty and amazing pics….

Denise Richards is looking pretty fit in her bikini bottoms…even though she’s 90, practically dead, and very very very fucking washed up….but in my defense, maybe I’m just into these pics because she’s with an inflatable, and like that dude on My Strange Addiction, who had a sexual relationship with inflatables, I’ve kinda been intrigued to try to fuck one…that sweet smell of plastic, those unlubricated seams that rip you apart at the pool….the whole experience likely more amazing than fucking the real life blow-up doll carrrying it….

But I’ll post the pics anyways…cuz she mattered once…back when she was a madame….in Hollywood….

I don’t know if these is staged or just bad construction, but the asshole asking for kisses through the glass window….pretty much deserved this kind of rejection, I mean you gotta treat girls you’re cat callin’ through a window with serious fucking respect….and when you don’t…you know when you objectify them…there’s always someone close by willing to play hero and defend their honor…because some people treat sluts like sluts, while other’s treat them like ladies….I just pay them for sex….

Piper Perabo from Coyote Ugly….and pretty much very little else….was invited to an event…because at least one person remembers that she got hired for a lot of movies in a short period of time 10 years ago…and she took advantage of the invite by making it count…wearing a see through shirt with some awkward pasties….you know hoping someone would talk about her again….

I don’t really see much pasties, but I do see a whole lot of head….and not the kind of head that makes me cum…here are the pics anyway….

I like me some model pussy…especially when it is cheating on one evil billion dollar corporation….that it normally models underwear and bikinis fro….for another evil billion dollar corporation….that funds sweat shops, that is responsible for the fall of production in America…that over charges people for 2 dollar items…

It’s like some weird underbelly, like Victoria’s Secret lends out their model, which is their number one asset, for some secret fabric supplier information or something….

But the backstory doesn’t matter, it’s the pictures that I’m more interested in…

Jesus, this South American bitch has some big fucking eyebrows, I mean these are some serious eyebrows, and by eyebrows, I mean eyebrows and not some clever way of saying tits, cuz you see we all know she’s busy as fuck, it’s why she is on TV, I mean better to get have a token middle aged hispanic woman in hollywood to be busty as fuck than not…..

But these eyebrows, they are distracting, all up on some Andy Rooney fucking caterpillars crawling on her face….

I guess they are better to soak up all the cum she’s had ejaculated on her face as she climbed the ladder in her career…

It all makes sense now, these eyebrows were just as important to her success as the titties that lead to all the blowjobs, because it acted as a much needed mop. I’ve seen how they clean up oil spills. I get what’s going on here….

This is pretty major for these UK Glamour models.

Girls who I always tease for not being actual models. You know just low hanging fruit that is built up to think it is hot, when really it only matters cuz it is topless.

Not that I have anything against girls who make it, or who are making money off their tits, in fact I love it.

I wish more average at best looking girls were broken enough to be doin it, because taking the traditional career route is just stupid, when you can get paid for your tits…

Historically all dudes want from you is to see your tits and lust after you, so use your vagina, it’s a far more marketable skill than a college degree.

That said, these Glamour Models are featured in some mainstream fashion site, topless, sure, that’s their move, but this is it…they can now say they are official models….and not some low grade shit…

Good times. Congrats.

I know Miranda Kerr, recently out of work, tired of having her nipples photoshopped, has gone on a bit of a rampage….

She’s even posted this pic of her cropped toplessness to her social media….like some kind of slut…

Sure, this, is not a spread pussy pic….it’s not like she’s officially lost her mind, but it is a cropped titty pic…what a slut…

I posted the original from her Vogue Italia shoot THE OTHER DAY ….you know the picture WITH THE NIPPLES STILL IN IT …

But I get excited, when these models get excited about their nude work…it means more to come!! Which means more for me to come to….

So this is a video from March 27 of a corrections officer in a prison getting knocked the fuck out….

20-year old prisoner Frederick Morris knocking out corrections officer Julie Christensen with a single punch

I don’t condone violence, especially not when a motherfucker Chris Brown’s a chick, but the video’s kinda wild….

Here’s another angle…

Dutch Model Daphne Groeneveld showed us her titties….I’ve done some POSTS ON HER BEFORE …and apparently she only turned 18 a few months ago, so it took her amazing little model body long enough to get those nipples out….but with all models….it is just a matter of time…the nipple is a sign of seriousness in their career….so I can’t say I’ve been waiting for this moment all my life, but I can say I’d write love songs for this babe if only she’d listen to them…until then, I’ll just stare at her nipple and pretend to breast feed by licking my computer screen…which I am sure will get my high with all the bacteria, STDS and remnants of MDMA all over it….yay.

Don’t Jump! Rihanna was in New York shooting a music video or a commercial or some shit and she took time out of her busy schedule to take a picture of her poppin her booty for social media because she knows what really matters…it’s not the money or the fame, sure that helps broaden her audience for her exhibitionism, but the core of what she’s about, is whoring herself out….even if this is some of her more tame work…

The unfortunate thing in all this, is that I find her hot.

Jessica Alba was walking around in workout gear and I figured I’d post it, despite Jessica Alba’s sex appeal being virtually dead, even if she’s bounced back from her pregnancies, she’s still had those pregnancies….

Sure she’s hotter than any girl you’ve got with, and you may still have a soft spot in your masturbation schedule for her, you know one for old times, cuz you have a hard time moving on….and sure even as a shell of what was, it’s still not horrible…

But I was hoping to see more cameltoe, tight pants do that to women, before realizing, her labia are probably taped to her inner thigh, you know as a result of those pregnancies…

Kate Bosworth got hired to do some video for Topshop about Coachella, which is both further proof that Coachella is some mainstream hipster bullshit….that has little to know cool to it…but instead is just over commercialized money making crap….that only matters because hot girls go to it….but more importantly, this video reminds us that Kate Bosworth still exists and that she can get work, she’s capable, and I’m into that cuz I kinda like Kate Bosworth, not that I remember anything she’s done as an actor, but I do remember her skinniness, and her ability to model….not that modeling takes much ability, but you get what I’m saying….

That said, this video fucking sucks. It’s so fucking boring….TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES BITCH.

Email of the day :

Can you please post some more on Lena Dunham she is my favorite.
She gets naked on Girls like every week & you never post about it & she is awesome.
I know she isn’t traditionally sexy but she has a girl next door look that I think is so sexy like she looks like the kind of chick you see working kfc or something just average but hot!

My response:

It is ppl like Lena Dunham who represent all that is wrong in the world! She should not be allowed naked in her private life or on TV and wanting to see her naked may mean you have a serious sexual dysfunction.

Here are some morning links….