I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

28

Dec

Janice Dickinson’s Dirty Tongue Kissing of the Day

I doubt watching a living corpse like Janice Dickinson rape a motherfucker with her tongue turns any of you on, but in the event that it does, here are the pictures.

I personally think it’s nice to see a bitch take some initiative, no matter how fucking disgusting Janice Dickinson happens to be, mainly because from my sexual history, I’ve been the one doing the raping at least 98% of the time, and the last 2% where I claim the bitch raped me, is usually because I have trouble admitting that I intentionally stuck my dick in them, and the rape accusation is the only way I can sleep at night….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Janice Dickinson|Tongue Kissing

2009

28

Dec

Alexandra Burke in Her Bikini of the Day

I’m going to try to make this post as long as this girl’s career is going to be.

Here’s a little black on black action…

Pics via INF

Posted in:Alexandra Burke|Bikini

2009

28

Dec

Gabrielle Union Flashing Some Bikini Bottom of the Day

I never heard of Gabrielle Union before, mainly because I’m not up to speed on black movies and the girls who are in them, despite having a thing for black girls. So I checked out her Wikipedia and the only thing that stood out was interesting was:

In 1992, at age 19, Union was attacked, beaten and raped at her part-time job in a shoestore.

You’d think that would have taught her not to wear a short skirt in public anymore….but based on these pictures of her flashing her cooch in her underwear for all sexually predators to get boners over, I guess she hasn’t….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Bikini Bottom|Flashing|Gabrielle Union

2009

28

Dec

Rich Designer Shoe Executive’s Fake Tits in her Bikini of the Day

This girl, or should I say, old haggard mom named Tamara Mellon, is a multi-millionaire thanks to some connections, a rich husband, a Asian shoe maker to exploit and friends who worked for fashion magazines and in the fashion world. She’s got fake tits, she reminds me of the cunts on Sex and the City and I just spent an hour cropping her daughters out of these pictures, cuz I don’t need th FBI coming after me, especially for something so fucking insignificant…Either way, her body is alright, you know not overly sloppy for a mom cuz she takes care of herself, even if her real assets aren’t real….and here she is flashin’ some ass….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Designer Shoe|Executive

2009

28

Dec

Pam Anderson’s Got Some Fucked Up Tits of the Day

Pam Anderson’s got some pretty stupid implants that she likes to show off to distract the world from her face, since they are still in their 20s and perky as shit, but by the looks of these pictures, even they find Pam Anderson disgusting as they try to make their escape in some kind of mass suicide in efforts to end the pain of being attachted to her, or maybe she’s just wearing too small of a bra…what the fuck do I know…I just know I felt these were worth posting for some stupid reason…

Pics via INF

Posted in:cleavage|Pam Anderson|Tits

2009

28

Dec

Some Dead President Offspring Bikini of the Day

I got this niche fetish that involves getting off to Dead President daughters in bikinis and since it’s a rare thing to find, since George Washington’s half breed slave babies are long dead, I am stuck with JFK’s daughter in her one-piece and that’s good enough for me…even though I highly doubt she’s good enough for her husband…he probably looks her over every night before bed, happy she’s not 300 pounds, but disappointed she’s not the hot pussy she was when they got married…

BONUS – SOME BLOWJOB FACE POSSIBLY NAKED UNDER HER TOWEL PICS

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Bikini|Caroline Kennedy

2009

28

Dec

Rihanna’s Fat Bajan Bikini Ass at Home of the Day

I don’t know about you, but seeing these pictures of Rihanna on the beach brings me hope. No, not the kind of hope that I will one day crawl inside her fat ass pussy and die from the smells, but because there was once a pop star named Lisa Left Eye Lopez and Aalyiah who went on similar vacations back to the islands and never came back to pollute our radio stations again and they weren’t nearly as offensive as Rihanna. So we can only hope…

I guess the other hope is that her family decide that she’s gone too far and lost her roots, and needs to take it the fuck down a notch, locking her in their shanty and never letting her out of their eye…or maybe her people will revolt because she is an embarassment and stone her to death, there are just so many options….all which hopefully involve her covering her shitty body up because it’s not that nice to stare at.

Merry Christmas too all and too all a good night, what? too soon….assholes….

Pics via INF

Posted in:barbados|Bikini|Rihanna

2009

27

Dec

From the stepFORUM of the Day

I have spent the last few days drunk in various places and it has almost been awesome, except for the fact that I have tried to convince endless tourists to invite me back to their hotel rooms to let me watch them shower together. You know a little fucking hot tub party because I feel like I’ve missed out on hot tub parties in my life and think it’s time to make up for lost time….all I need is to find some willing pussy.

On a sidenote, I woke up with an erection. I think that means I am over my impotence or depression caused by my wife’s body after spending the last decade on Precious’ diet….while I’ve spend the last decade trying Precious’ dad’s school of parenting…but only because I think fucking my stepdaughters is a right of passage before sending them off to the world to fend for themselves….and it doesn’t end with retard babies…

Speaking of retard babies, here’s some shit going on in the stepFORUM to keep you busy, while the rest of the world is on vacation. Cuddles….

Register to See Everything!
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———Celebs———

HOT! Rachelle Leah in Maxim Magazine (SFW)
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Charlize Theron – Flaunt Magazine
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Kate Beckinsale – Ugly Duckling
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Anna Friel upskirt leaving Theatre Royal
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Keira Knightley – David Harry Stewart Photoshoot
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HOT – Stephanie Pratt in Maxim Magazine (SFW)
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Sophia Bush-Glory Road Premiere
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Angelina Jolie – Davis Factor PS
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Kate Beckinsale out in a miniskirt
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Vanessa Hudgens – Signs Autographs
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Audrina Patridge – Out in Los Angeles
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Dita Von Teese – Book Signing in LA
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Tila Tequila upskirt Out at Villa Lounge
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Tila Tequila upskirt Out at Villa Lounge
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Some Rihanna Cleavage
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Pamela Anderson’s Massive Camel Toe
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HOT – Rosa Acosta – King Mag
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———Random——–

Josh and Amber: A Sex letter (A MUST read!!)
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Move Bitch (hilarious video(
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Real Girls (some NSFW)
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Stereotyping People by Their Favorite Author
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Spoon – Written In Reverse
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Classic! (video)
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Kansas – There’s Know Place Like Home (2009)
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Summertime Girls (some NSFW)
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Muppets – ringing of the bells (video)
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More Real Girls (NSFW)
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The Pope Getting Jacked Up
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I like to watch people puke (video)
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Greatest Hits Deluxe Edition (2009)
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I am – Random Link of the Day (CLICK ME!)
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———Audio Books———

Sword of Truth – Terry Goodkind (12 audiobooks)
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Cesar Millan – Be The Pack Leader
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———E-books———

Cyber Warfare
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iPhone Life Winter 2010
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Sound and Vision January 2010
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Beer December 2009
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———E-Comic Books———

Uncanny X-Men 519
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Dark X-Men
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Star Wars The Constancia Affair
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———Sleaziness———

Action Girls Volume 1
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Amateurs Shelbie & Levi
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Hot as Hell Legal teens
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Ass POV 2
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My Sisters Hot Friend:Eva Angelina
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Orgy Sex Parties 7
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LOVE GISELE… dont you?
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Now THAT’s an Ass!
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Some Random Amateurs
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Young Latin Ass 7
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My Sisters Hot-friend:Aletta Ocean
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Young and Busty
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Leather tease
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Posted in:stepFORUM

2009

25

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

Marie-Eve Martinez here. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m the youngest of Jesus’ two step-daughters and for those of you who do know me, it’s been far too long, I know.

Did you miss me? I’ve missed you!.

I got an email from Jesus late last night telling me that if I didn’t hear from him by this evening I should be prepared to take the helm for the day, possibly even forever, because his absence could likely mean he is dead in an alley somewhere, or at least completely comatose and passed out in a puddle of his own holiday sick – a lethal combination of KFC Holiday Supper for One, discount bottom shelf booze and/or cough syrup. I’m sitting here full after a long and over drawn Christmas dinner, and by Christmas dinner I mean a half a bottle of Jameson, sick of Christmas movies, Christmas decorations and if I hear one more Christmas song, I will probably puke. I’d like to meet the guy who wrote It’s a Wonderful Life and ask him just whose life he was talking about, or maybe just put a bullet in his head. Either or.

My brand new Yorkshire Terrier is humping my arm while I type this to an obscene amount. The dog, which I don’t particularly care for, was a gift from a guy I care for even less than the dog. He is a cute little bastard though – I’m speaking of the guy here, not the dog although the dog is okay too – and if anything that serves as a reminder that even though I hate Christmas, I do love cock, and if that means giving a small rodent a good home, I suppose I can. It makes me feel charitable this time of year without having to go work in a soup kitchen around homeless people that reek of piss more than Jesus does on a hot day.

Anywhooo, from all of us at drunkenstepfather.com, to all 6 of you reading this out there, we hope you have Happy Holidays. Or don’t. Whatever. Actually, we hate you and we hope you drive home drunk and kill yourself, or at least someone else.

But before you do that, you should probably click these links.

Hugs and Kisses

Marie-Eve Martinez


A 2009 Celebrity Bikini Recap You Don’t Want to Miss
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Merry Christmas!! Let’s Tackle the Pope
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Because I Know You’re Suicidal and Alone on Christmas
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This Just In: Britney Spears is Still Crazy
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Christmas Then and Now
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Santa’s Slay Looks Like the Best Christmas Movie EVER
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Rosie Jones Topless Christmas Card. Holiday Greetings From NUTS Magazine
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Gwenyth Paltrow is So Disgusting
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Mary J Blige Wouldn’t Punch Her Husband, But She Will Threaten Him
With Violence Until He Backs the Fuck Down – VIDEO
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The Top 10 Things We’ll Have A Hard Time Explaining To Our Grandchildren Of The Decade
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How The Grinch Touched Christmas – VIDEO
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Striptease of the Day
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Singer Amy Winehouse Charged With Assault
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Katy Perry Makes Me Want to Puke
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Christina Aguilera Makes Motherhood Look Good, Except For the
WHole Pushing a Baby Out of Her Vagina Part
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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If Santa Isn’t a Hot Slut, I Don’t Know Who Is
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Gabrielle Union in a Marc Baptiste Photo Shoot
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Ahhh to Find a Blonde in Your Bed
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How Not to Do a Burn Out in a Car That’s Way Too Good For a Person Like You
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More Drunk Sluts in the VIP
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Lexi is Masterbating
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Skater Boy Double Fail
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Lela Star is Sexy
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Adriana Volpe Topless
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Now THAT’S a Fucking Dildo
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I Wish This Slut Was My Christmas Tree
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Jennifer Lamiraqui Wants to Wish You a Merry Christmas
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Nikki, Sammie and Roxane Live Together
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Ginger Peels Off Her Lingerie
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WTF Photo of the Day
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Gorgeous Girls Gift Wrapped [56 Photos]
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Alison Angel Looks Great in the Sun
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Nuts – ‘Sexiest New Babes of 2010!’
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Violet Loves Christmas and I Love Violet
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I Knew Star Trek Had Huge Homo Erotic Undertones
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Bitch Needs a Brazilian
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Classic: N64 Christmas Kid
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Yeah I’d Fuck a Bitch in Tie Dye
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Posted in:Uncategorized

2009

25

Dec

The Marc Jacobs’ Beach Christmas Special of the Day

Wanna know what Marc Jacobs got for Christmas….Fucked up the ass….at least he has his birth control patch on…so that he won’t be making gay babies/cum farts.

Feliz Navidad…..you queers…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Christmas|Marc Jacobs

2009

24

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

Merry Christmas To All and To All a Good Night…you gang of fucking assholes…

Olivia Wilde’s Ass is Mighty, Mighty Fine
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Bad News Everybody, Christmas Has Herpes This Year
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New Developments From the Courtney Love School of Parenting
This Bitch is Giving Joan Crawford a Run for Her Money
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Because It’s Christmas Eve and You Have a Better Chance of Winning the Lottery Than Getting Laid
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On Christmas Morning – VIDEO
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Frankie and Johnny’s Furniture – VIDEO
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Anna Friel and Her Panty Upskirt
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Katie Holmes is Disgusting
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Country Hicks Are Ridiculous and I Don’t Feel Bad Laughing At Them Whatsoever
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25 Awesome Winter Fails
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Stripfilm of the Day
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Okay I Love Hamburger as Much as Anyone, But This Bitch is Taking It a Bit Far
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Red Box Has to Pull These Ads of Brittany Murphy And I Don’t Blame Them
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I Can’t Wait Till Madonna’s Teenaged Daughter Rebels Against Her Geriatric Ass
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There’s a New Kevin Smith Movie and Here is the Trailer
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Good News!!! Miley Cyrus May Drop Dead!
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Candice Swanepoel Gallery
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Merry Christmas From Jana
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Skirt Gets Pulled Off on Live TV – VIDEO
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Jamee in the Dressing Room
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Now This is a Rap Battle – VIDEO
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Horney Sluts Get Dirty in the VIP
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Alessandra Ambrosio Collection
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Christmas Morning Temper Tantrum
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Top 10 Ho Ho Hos of Hollywood
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Shakira is Topless
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Sonia Hits the Showe
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Gotta Love Big Tits in a Sling Shot – VIDEO
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Stephanie Seymour Looks Great in a Bikini, Even If She is Holding Something she Pushed Out of Her Vagina
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Lucky Lesbians Paulina James and Kylie Wild
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Angel Dark in a Tiny Black Thong
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Kristen Jean is a Girl Next Door Type
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Fuck You Kim Kardashian
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Gotta Love a Big Titted Blonde
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Jennifer is a Golden Girl
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Doutzen Kroes Deserves Our Gratitude
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How Much to Party With Jersey Shore?!
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I Still Gotta Thing For Black Chicks
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Susan Sarandon is Molesting a Young Boy
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ALESSANDRA AMBROSIO GIFTWRAPS HERSELF FOR CHRISTMAS … AND THEN UNWRAPS THE HOT PRESENT FOR YOU!
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Some Body Painted Video Girl
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

24

Dec

All I want for Christmas is Lohan to Send Me a Text Message of the Day

Lindsay Lohan is a bad santa. Let’s hope she doesn’t try to work for the make-a-wish foundation, or even to hit up all the homeless shelters or sick kid hospitals this Christmas for attention cuz she’s a bad fucking santa….

All I asked her for was to send me a couple nude pics and instead she just pretended I don’t exist, because in her world I don’t, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt me on the inside when I sat by my phone while sugar plims danced in my head, waiting for a response, especially when I see these pictures of her so actively and passionately texting some other motherfucker who is proabbly more relevant than me, but I like to think she’s just doing it to mock me knowing she ignored me and driving that point home.

Sure at first I thought maybe she was too busy getting her lips done to use her phone, then I thought that maybe she was doing me a favor because she knows her vagina’s a mess and something not worth seeing and that not sending me nudes a Christmas Miracle in disguise….and it really doesn’t matter cuz she’s in 5 years no one will even remember who Lohan is…..

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Chirstmas|Lindsay Lohan|Text

2009

24

Dec

Jessica Simpson Without Make-Up of the Day

Whoever told Jessica Simpson this was a good idea, needs to be fired….but at least she’s dressed like a Christmas present, which is only fitting because I hear when you unwrap her ass, it looks like sugarplums dancing in your head, smells and tastes like Christmas Dinner if it was blended and left in the sun for a week and has the constant discharge that has the color and consistency of eggnog….and I’d totally feast on this shit if given the opportunity cuz all I want for Christmas is to K-Fed her….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Make-Up

2009

24

Dec

Melanie Griffith is a Street Whore of the Day

She looks like one of those weathered whores who offers pretty solid discounts, especially this time of year, because most people go for the whore who still has a functioning vagina. She’s dressed like one because cheap animal prints make the whores feel luxurious in such an not so luxurious job. She’s picking up a john like one, sure it’s her husband Antonio Banderas, but you know this is all just part of their sick roleplaying sex games and that the first Aspen back alley they find, motherfucker will be fuckin’ her behind a dumpster…..

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Melanie Griffith|Whore

2009

24

Dec

Avril Lavigne’s Fat Ass and New Pussy on the Beach of the Day

I guess Avril Lavigne finally got her skater boy, but by the looks of this dude, he’s more of a figure skating boy than an actual skater boy, but maybe that’s what happens when we get older, the silly emo kid in platform shoes and spiked dyed hair becomes more of a fucking joke, you know that phase she’ll look back on and cringe she needs someone a little more refined….and by refined I mean someone who doesn’t care about how she’s gained 25 lbs and doesn’t want bang with the lights on…which works for him because he’d rather be fucking his heavyset male hairstylist and the darkness allows him to visualize her doughy body against his is actually his stylists’, only his male hairstylist doesn’t get him the same visibility as pretending to be straight and into this popstar who looks like she’s gained her holiday weight a little early….and lucky for us she wasn’t wearing a bikini…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Ass|Avril Lavigne|Fat