I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

02

Sep

Mel B Whoring Out in Public of the Day

I am the kind of guy who loves watching people fuck. Unfortunately, I’m not some kind of baller who can afford to pay couples to let me sit in the dark corner in their rooms to take part in their sex life as an audience member, so I am forced to take what I can get.

Sometimes taking what I can get is watching people make out or finger on the dance floor, other times it is a little more crafty and involves climbing up fire escapes, trees, balconies across the street and shit like that to get the solid fucking view, and by sometimes I mean all the time, because the only time I got a regular fix of peepin’ tom was when I had a roomate who would fuck in the living room next to me while I’d be watching TV.

The good news is that I don’t get off to the shit, I just find it fun to watch, so I keep my exposing my boners for the school girls on public transportation and here’s Mel B shoving her whore tongue down someone I assume is her boyfriend or husband’s throat. See I’m not up to speed on who Mel B is letting visit her Vag since that whole Eddie Murphey shit…but here are the pics…

Pics VIA INFPhoto

Posted in:Mel B|Public|Whore

2009

02

Sep

America Turns on Aubrey O’Day of the Day

So Aubrey O’Day is getting some heat because she says that Castro is a brilliant man, which upsets Fox News because they are born to hate Castro and communism as it is against the American way or some shit, because during the Cold War, Castro allied with the Russians, because he knew America was going to try to take over his country and he didn’t want that.

It is the same mentality that people have when they say “drive American cars”, when everyone knows American made cars are shit, but are just told to think that…..because I know the people of Fox News have never been to Cuba and have no idea first hand what Cuban life is like, but are full of shit…

Truth is that most psychopaths, murderers and political leaders are geniuses, and calling Castro a murderer is like calling George W. Bush a murderer for invading the middle east without a real just cause where troops and civilians died only I think Bush had less passion than Castro.

Once they backed her into the corner they asked her if she thought Hitler was brilliant and she said yes, and everyone went nuts…

So in her defense, what Hitler did was sick, disgusting, and psychotic, but the fact that he was able to get a whole country to follow his lead is proof that he was a charismatic and genius and the motherfucker just had sick use of his genius…..

Either way, I wanna fuck Aubrey O’Day.

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Castro|Hitler

2009

02

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

I am drunk. I am confused. I know I have to put up my stepLINKS but I am too distracted by the fat girl I just met in the bar who asked if I’d let her lick my asshole and when I said yes, she just called me a faggot and walked away with her other fat friends. I think I was just made fun of and I guess I deserve it cuz in dishin’ it all day, I can take it every once in a while, as long as shit is done clever. Not that you care, here are my stepLINKS

Seriously, Madonna Needs to Give It Up and Put Her Fucking Vadge Away
GO

Putting on a Condom Can Get Dangerous
GO

The 10 Hottest Girls Born In September
GO

Lego Trip, I Wish I Still did Drugs
GO

Pixie Lott Has Got it Going On
GO

Gerri Halliwell Camel Toe and Pokies
GO

Because the Best Way to Finish the Day is Bustin a Load
GO

Jessica Simpson is So Irrelavant is Almost Not Even Funny Anymore. Almost.
GO

How To: Survive When Your City Catches on Fire
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Aubrey O’Day Loves Fidel Castro and Hitler
GO

Phil Spector is Having a Big Old Cry in Jail
GO

I Wanna Motor Boat Jason Priestley’s Wife
GO

christina Milian Doesn’t Look As Racially Confused As She Has Over the Part Few Months
GO

Julie and Her Big Old Tits
GO

So Katie Price Was Raped When Young and Now We’re All Supposed to Excuse Her For Being a Dumb Whore
GO

Wow Finally Some Pics of Tyra Banks That Don’t Make Me Want to Puke
GO

Now THIS is a Music Video
GO

And The Girls Get Naked
GO

Don’t go to the KFC in Hong Kong – VIDEO
GO

Maybe Chris Brown Will Beat Up Larry King Next
GO

Pussy Fun in the Bedroom
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Kayden Kross in a Short Blue Dress
GO

Hell Hello There Daniela
GO

Nice Bums Ladies
GO

Who is Jessica Gomes and Why Don’t I Have Nudes Of Her Yet?
GO

Gabrielle Richens is Bottomless
GO

Teen Brunete in the Snow
GO

Megan Fox Elle Magazine Outtakes
GO

Latoya Jackson’s New Video is the Best Comedy of 2009
GO

Aria Giovanni vs The Beer Bong
GO

Because We All Love Checking Out the New fish in the Sea
GO

Private Cinema Viewing
GO

Some Lohan in a Bikini
GO

Firecrotch or No, I Loe Me a Redhead
GO

Okay I Love Michael Jackson As Much as the Next Person, But Seriously
GO

to Drunk to Legally Fuck
GO

IF HOLLY MADISON COULD BE THIS HOT EVERY DAY, HUGH HEFNER WOULD STILL BE FUCKING HER!
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

01

Sep

Kayden Kross Says Blowjobs are for Everyone of the Day

I don’t know about the title of this article she wrote, but I guess it’s designed for women or some shit, because as far as I know, every single dude I have met in my life has been down to get his dick sucked by a chick. Either way, I have this love for Kayden Kross and when this was emailed to me I figured I’d post it up here for you to read, because lets face it, who better to talk about blowjobs than an angel sent from heaven who gets paid to suck dick on camera…..I didn’t read it yet, but will, cuz I know it will be hot and that’s just the kind of editing I do and if reading isn’t your thing, email this to the girl you’re trying to fuck or the girl you have no choice but to fuck, maybe it’ll teach her some thigns and if you scroll down there are some pics of her dyking out….

BJs are fun for everyone
Let’s talk about blow jobs. Of the many many things porn botches and distorts I think blow jobs take the hardest hit. Blow jobs and boobs. If you watch any award winning porn you’re going to see this: 3-5 minutes of gagging, spitting and choking on a dick that was hard before she got it out of his pants. She’ll slap her face with it. She’ll jerk it hard and fast. She’ll stop and go. She’ll baby talk it. You probably won’t see his face but it’s there—the bad blowjob grimace.
.. ..
Blow jobs are an art form. They require time and patience and love. While they are great for foreplay I think they’ve been typecast. They’re not only foreplay. They are a means unto themselves, and ladies, if you’re really doing them right you probably love them as much as he does. A good blow job can be better than sex. It is not a coupon that you issue on birthdays and holidays or when you fuck up. It is not a chore. It is an exercise in meditation. I zone out when I give them. I go to my happy place where the penis and I exist in perfect harmony. The very thought of giving one makes me salivate. I don’t believe in lube I believe in blow jobs.
.. ..
A member of my website emailed me his theory on blow job cohorts. He thinks teenagers of the 70’s love to give them, teenagers of the 80’s find them degrading, and teenagers of the 90’s came back around again. Apparently there are blow job generational gaps. I have not tested this theory, and being a teenager of the last decade and generally ignorant of sexual culture outside of my bubble I was unaware that blowjobs had ever been out of favor since the advent of birth control. If you like them, read on, if not, there are many more bloggers out there who are far less concerned with the business of BJs.
.. ..
Here’s why boys like vaginas: they’re soft and wet and warm and lined with tight  muscles. The entire reason blow jobs are so wonderful for boys is they mimic this habitat. But vaginas don’t have teeth. Teeth are used for grinding flesh and roughage. They maim and kill. So keep your fucking teeth out of it, which means don’t dive bomb his poor dick with your throat. I don’t care how cool it looks in porn. It’s very hard to get perfect aim at high speed. If you feel you must deep throat for the bragging rights, then depress your tongue over the top of your lower front teeth and breath out slowly as you go down on it. It feels like it pops into place. But do it slowly and avoid dragging sharp objects across it at all costs. If you’re not sure whether you’ve done it, look for tears. They are a sure sign of throat blockage.
.. ..
Vaginas don’t hit either, so don’t smack it against things. When you see guys in porn pull out and slap it around they’re not doing it because it feels good. They’re doing it so they don’t cum. That means it feels not good. And I understand dirty talk, I do, but you know what you’re not doing when you’re going cross-eyed staring at his dick and telling him all the dirty things you’re gonna do to him? You’re not sucking his dick. So shut up and suck it. Save the dirty talk for times when your mouth is not occupied or at least pick up sign language.
.. ..
Pay attention to where contact is actually being made. While avoiding teeth you may end up going too far the other direction and not giving enough stimulation. He can feel the whole length of a vagina, he can’t always feel the whole length of a mouth. Make it count. The head and immediately underneath it are the bulls eye, then from there take in as much as you can without sacrificing quality for quantity. Shafts are cool but that’s why you have hands so use them. If you use both then use them in the same way, and use them with spit. Live by these words: the wetter the better. The best wetness comes from the back of the mouth. It’s longer lasting like Doublemint gum. Do not make a sock toy out of his penis. That is an absolute no-no. Massage it, stroke it, love it. Don’t hurt or desensitize it. The meaner you get the harder it’s going to be for him to cum. Blow jobs are only fun in the absence of lockjaw.
.. ..
Now here is why blow jobs rule: vaginas don’t have tongues. Tongues can go any direction they want. And they’re soft and wet and strong. They are a dick’s best friend. Don’t ruin that relationship. Don’t flick at it with the tip. Put as much tongue surface area as you can on him in a steady circular motion and it will keep you salivating and him happy. It will also keep your lower teeth covered. Remember you’re trying to one-up a vagina here. It just so happens that when you’re facing his belly button with his dick in your mouth it lands right where it should on your tongue, with the underside of the head nestled safely in it’s care. That’s because nature intended for us to give head constantly.
.. ..
Hands are dry, bony, and the least-soft body part you can use on him unless he’s into feet. They are not a lost cause though. He seems to get by with his own with no problem on a daily basis. Grip it just enough that the skin can be used as a sleeve, so that it moves with the hand and not against it. It’s especially nice when you can use the foreskin or what’s left of it when gliding over the head. A harmonious blow job puts your lips in near or direct contact with the top of the fist you’ve made around his shaft, and everything moves together. The hand covers what the mouth couldn’t get to and the mouth keeps everything lubricated. It’s a fine example of teamwork. The slow twisting motion that everyone seems to talk about is not urban legend. Use it.
.. ..
Let’s talk about all the little tricks you’ve heard of. Humming. Blowing. Nibbling. Ice. Playing with balls. Feathers. Vibrators. Toys in buttholes. Whatever. Some are cool. Some are not. The problem with these tricks is the blow jobber ends up focusing too much on the tricks and not enough on the penis at hand. Only do it if it doesn’t take away from the quality job you were already doing. I like to stroke lightly from the back of the balls towards the shaft with just my fingertips. I use my left hand when I do it and my tongue and right hand never miss a beat. Blow jobs in the wild don’t need bells and whistles though. Don’t let Cosmo confuse you.
.. ..
And now the most important thing of all: rhythm. It doesn’t matter how perfectly you do everything else if you don’t do it with an even tempo. Every time you stop and go you’re starting over on building his orgasm. If you pay attention you can feel him respond to the speed he likes. Faster does not always equal better. You’re not in a race, and if you were you’d lose because too fast will only desensitize him. He’ll get harder as he gets closer, he’ll get softer if you’re doing something wrong. Adjust accordingly. Just because I’m stressing an even tempo doesn’t mean you shouldn’t speed up or slow down as required. It means transition slowly. Balls also move. A lot. Balls are the window to his soul. Pay attention to where they are and what they’re doing and you’ll get a feel for how to tell when he’s close. Some guys have poker balls though, in which case focus on whatever changes—breathing, flexing etc…  Once he starts to cum, do not change what you’re doing, whatever that may be. If you hit a rut, stop, give it a rest for a few minutes, and start anew. It’s a blow job blank slate. In my experience, once you pick up the right motion, the guesswork is gone. You will become one with the penis and it pulls you into an altered state and suddenly you’ll feel like an extension of it and when he cums you might have a feel-good moment too. At least I do. And that’s why I love them.
.. ..
Disclaimer: The second you feel like you’ve mastered it you’ll probably meet the guys who likes teeth and vice grips and throws a wrench in the whole process. I can’t control for the outliers.

Did you like that? I think you should give your advice on how you suck dick, you queer. Now pics….

Posted in:Blowjobs|Kayden Kross

2009

01

Sep

Britney and Jamie Lynn Spears in their Bikinis of the Day

I started this post with these Britney pics that are shit quality and that we’ve all seen before, when really the only one triggering any of my fantasies (teenage pregnancy) is Jamie Lynn Spears. You know I have these theory about teenage mothers bouncing back after getting kocked up because they still have that youthful metabolism, despite their mature looking vaginas, and that kind of baggage makes them less picky when deciding who to fuck, if anything it makes them more eager to put out because they just want to lure a man who won’t leave them hanging like the last one, and the whole thing means no condoms and in Jamie Lynn’s case, that’s an okay thing because before her baby daddy, she only slept with a handful of execs and Disney and they were all smart enough to use a condom cuz they didn’t want to go to jail, and while other 18 year olds were ould whoring themselves, this bitch was at home breast feeding, so like everyone always says, don’t judge a book by the cover or in this case a vagina by how many fingers you can stick in the shit, cuz I have a feeling she’s not a slut, she’s just perfection…

Posted in:Bikini|Britney Spears|Jamie Lynn Spears

2009

01

Sep

The Georgetown Cuddler is Amazing of the Day

This dude is the single greatest sex offender I have come across. Just yesterday I was telling this hot chick I was walking down the street with that it’d be amazing to randomly hug people, you know just videotape us walking up to random people from behind and giving them a real solid fuckin’ hug, something loving that you’d expect to get from an old friend, just to see their reaction, but this weirdo, the Georgetown Cuddler, took it to the next fucking level, snuck into beds at night and cuddled up to single girls and that deserves a fuckin’ toast, or even a minor celebration cuz that is on some whole other level that I wish I was creepy enough to be on but still feel like I connect with…Especially since “Cuddles” used to be my obnoxious catch phrase when ripping into people online…

Posted in:Cuddler|stepNEWS

2009

01

Sep

Hayden Panettiere in Her Pink Spandex Shorts of the Day

When I first saw these Hayden pics, I thought “gross, I can see her balls” or vagina shaped like balls, like she was a gay dude on rollerskates, but as I saw them from a little closer I may or may not have got a little turned on. There’s just something about tight spandex, vagina hugging shorts that drive me a little bananas, shit just gets my nuts goin nuts, even if the bitch is built like a pick-up truck, maybe even is a little manly in her stance, or short in her stature, but these shorts just cancel all that out and are a huge reason why I sit by the bike path every weekend watching rollerbladers go by cuz they aren’t just for celebs you know, they are everywhere and I love them.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Shorts

2009

01

Sep

Cougar Convention in San Francisco of the Day

Here’s a funny convention that I think I should organize the after party to, because Cougars in their knowledge of cock, need for male attention and love for younger cock because the chances of it ending up in another failed marriage are slim to none, keeping the relationship strictly fucking sexual is amazing to come across one night randomly at the bar, but much more amazing to walk in on a whole group of bitches who have already embraced the lifestyle enough to travel to conventions designed for them, you know this isn’t a one too many drink situation, this is a lifestyle, just be sure to wear a fuckin’ condom, cuz these older whores are known to be dirty from fuckin’ a lot and not using condoms since getting pregnant is a lot of the time all they really want….

Sure this is an example of giving women too many rights, making them think this lifestyle is amazing, when really they are miserable and just wish they had a man to serve and be controlled by, but at least they put out…

Posted in:cougar|stepNEWS

2009

01

Sep

Beyonce Performing With No Pants on in the Ukraine of the Day

Here’s a video of Beyonce performing some shitty song in the Ukraine with no pants on, which I figured was appropriate because Ukranian people have been known to love not wearing pants, especially back in the human trafficking era of communism. I don’t know anything about the Ukraine so I pulled that one out of the catalog, so if it sucked, I am sure it didn’t suck as much as life does for Jay-z, everytime Beyonce makes him come home from his real money makin’ girlfriend to play house and feed her ego by listening to her talk about when she wins that Academy award, despite Beyonce getting fed on any level being a bad idea,

Here are some pics of Beyonce and Jay Z at some pool party clothed…thank god…..

And here is Rihanna’s 10 Million Dollar Mansion Jay-Z pretty much bought her in Hollywood….Just to remind Beyonce where his priorities are…

Posted in:Beyonce|No Pants|Performing

2009

01

Sep

Helen Mirren Shows Us Where Her Legs End and Vagina Starts of the Day

Helen Mirren has one of my favorite sets of Granny tits in Hollywood, I mean they’ve got nothing on some of the immigrant Granny tits I saw when I was working as an orderly at an old folk’s home back when I had “Granny Issues” because I never had a grandma growing up, she was too busy working before leaving us high and dry, never showing up on Christmas, making me spend the rest of my life trying to fill that void, first with a cookie addiction and then with knitting classes and finally getting paid to change granny diaper and wash granny ass that would always end with me nestling up to granny tit after the medication kicked in and they’d pass out around 8 pm, and as my pervert friend from the park would say when girls in dresses walked by, you can see where her Vagina Starts and her Legs End which is something that is always quite magical….

Posted in:Helen Mirren|Vagina

2009

01

Sep

Pole Dancing Doll for Kids of the Day

Here’s a publicity stunt that I don’t think is all that bad of an idea. Some dude came out with the pole dance doll for kids and it’s obviously a fuckin’ joke to get people to check out his company or for adults to send to each other because no parent would buy this for their kids even though some of them should.
The way I see it, stripping is a good “university of life”. It teaches girls what guys really care about about how to manipulate that and make money giving them a taste of what they want.

So welfare families who already know their kids will have little to no opportunity, because they have little to offer their kids, in regards to having a better life or better future, just need to be realisitic and say “maybe finishing high school isn’t for you, when you are at your prime and could be making more money than you’ll ever make anywhere”, instead of giving them the “normal” life and letting girls come to their own conclusion when depsaration hits and they are no longer 18.

If you were to embrace their future for them and introduce them to the concept, they could seriously rise to the top of the sex trade, instead of secretly do it shamefully cuz they feel they have no other option. Shit is a legit career and really should be taught in some schools, maybe even as a gym class cuz I think it’s the greatest fallback plan…..

Posted in:Pole Dance Doll|Stripping Youth

2009

01

Sep

Asia Argento in her Bikini on Vacation of the Day

Here’s one of those weird girls in the back of your class who sits at home on weekends writing poems and shit, you know the kind of person with few to no friends who takes life way too fucking seriously and who is introverted, dark and kinda scary to be around because you are scared she is going to lose her shit and stab you in the fuckin neck. One of those artist types you expect to see doing weird nude live performances in a weird theater troupe, but what do I fuckin’ know, I’ve only heard of her a few times and that was cuz of her tits.
Her name is Asia Argento, she’s been naked in a few movies, she’s writen a few movies, he’s directed a few movies and she wears really stupid fuckin bathing suits, but at least she’s got hot tits.

Here she is naked and having sex in some French Movie….

Pics via INF

Here she is topless in some other movie…..

Here she is taking a bath….

Here she is in another sex scene

Posted in:Uncategorized

2009

01

Sep

Camila Alves’ Hairy Stomach is Pregnant and in a Bikini of the Day

Pregnant with Matthew McConaughey’s second baby that he knows about, Brazilian Camila Alves showed off her hairy swollen uterus. Maybe it has to do with her hormones being all out of wack since she’s got something growing inside of her, but I’m pretty sure it’s got more to do with her latin roots cuz those bitches tend to be hairy as fuck, which always amazes me because I’ve got latin roots but for some reason have a patchy beard that reminds me of a 13 year old french kid. Maybe that means that I’m more woman than I like to admit, depsite being forced to admit it everytime I take a piss and realize I’m squirting out of nothing more than a pathetic little clit, but that’s not the point, the point is that I’d definitely fuck this bitch well into her third trimester without a condom, just because I know she can’t get pregnant with my kid if she’s already pregnant, it’s real simple biology.

Bonus – Matthew McConaughey’s mom was also sluttin’ out on the beach with her Texan granny ass….

Pics via INF

Posted in:Bikini|Camila Alves|Pregnant

2009

01

Sep

Rebecca Creskoff’s Fire Bush in Hung of the Day

I have never heard of Rebecca Creskoff, and I guess that’s probably why I am doing a post on her red pubic haired vagina, see since she’s pretty much 40 years old and not a household name, she’s gotta push the boundaries of legitimate acting and ender the world of softcore porn just to get some work as time is simply running out.

That’s not to say the show Hung is softcore porn, cuz I know it’s some HBO shit that isn’t, but in Rebecca Ceskoff’s eyes, it might as well be, because she only got hired cuz she flashes pussy and this is the height of her career.

I am always fascinated by redheads, when I was younger thinking of a red lipped orange haird pussy made me gag, but as I’ve got older and more open minded, I realize that I shoulda been fucking all the redheads when no one wanted them, because now it is too late and the whole “I’m a redhead, I’m a freak with asthma who has no friends but I do have severe nut allergies” is a thing of the past and these bitches have embraced their sex appeal. Assholes…

Here’s the Red Bush flash one more time…..

Here are some screenshots….

Posted in:Bush|Hung|Rebecca Creskoff

2009

01

Sep

Rihanna is Almost Topless in Vogue of the Day

Where I come from, this is not considered topless, this is considered fucking annoying. As far as I’m concerned if there is no nipple exposed, there is no tit exposed and I’d let my 15 year old daughter go to school like this, because really there’s nothing erotic about it and if you think there is, you have some twisted perception of erotica motherfucker, not to mention you’re a fucking pervert because bitch is only 15.

The good news is that I don’t have a 15 year old daughter and I guess Vogue tried to bring it so we should give them some “props”, even though I’m over Rihanna, I think she’s got a stupid fucking face and is full of shit and even my dog barked at her when she was on TV at my neighbor’s house and he only barks at animals, so maybe I’ve been delusional all these years, you know, tricked by the fucking media…..they are everywhere….telling us what to think….we can’t escape….

Here are those pics of her as a robot, which I hope are more interesting than my useless babble…

Posted in:Rihanna|Topless