Modern Day Journalism
 
 

2011

28

Mar

Kylie Minogue Playin Out Some Kinf of Fetish on Stage of the Day

Here’s some Kylie Minogue in some weird Star Wars Roman Empire looking costume that I assume some of you nerd virgin losers are into. You know Sci/Fi fantasy shit…that brings back memories of you fisting yourself to Kid Icarus as you tried to save the world from evil while everyone else you knew was out hanging with their friends on the weekend and not sitting at home with their mom eating oreos while taking breaks from their Nintendo…

I’m posting it to show that breast cancer doesn’t slow a bitch down or rob her of her feminity and sex appeal, bitch can hustle her old lady shit in a way that makes me want to knock her up….or at least try.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2011

28

Mar

Kim Kardashian’s Circus Freak Relationship of the Day

I call bullshit.

Sure, maybe the family is connected at the soul, you know cuz Kris Humphries has two sisters named Krystal and Kaela, on some ridiculous “We name our kids with the letter K” connection….but there’s no way this motherfucker is black enough for Kim Kardashian’s liking. Maybe the 6 foot 9 factor allows his penis to work in the way of Ray J, you know cuz even a tiny dick on a 6 foot 9 dude is probably a foot long, and Kardashian needs big cock to fill her fat cunt, all girls love big cock, but Kardashian needs big cock, just to get around that huge ass of her and penetrate her pussy at the same time, dude needs to be at least a foot just to get the tip in.

Not that it matters.

What matters is that I’m pretty sure Kardashian’s into this cuz she appreciates the fact people notice her cuz this spectacle is almost comical….I just hope the sex tape’s being filmed, cuz seriously, I love freakshow sex. It’s a weakness.

Posted in:Kim Kardashian

2011

28

Mar

Britney Spears Performing in a Leotard of the Day

I guess someone told Britney she wasn’t too fat to wear a leotard and that she wasn’t going to look like the fat kid in the dance recital trying to squeeze into the same costume as the skinny kid cuz they needed cohesiveness in their performance, and dressing her up as the fat blog of shit the other kids dance around in fear cuz it’s not politically correct, assuming Britney Spears cares about being too fat or capable, she’s just going through the motions she is contractually obliged to, cuz her team that lives off her success doesn’t want the money train to ever end, figuring she’s already got no shame, no dignity, and pretty much no soul, they better just ride this bitch out as hard as they can, whether it humilates the bitch or not, cuz she won’t know the fucking different….and the sick thing in all this is that I’m loving her big, round fat ass, I wanna take a fucking bite out of the shit I know is smeared all over it thanks to a lack of hygiene or ability to take care of herself…you know how crazy people are…maybe it’s cuz I know she’s wrapped so tight in that latex that buttery maple syrup is pouring off her….either way…I like it.

Posted in:Britney Spears

2011

28

Mar

Retard Room with a View of the Day

Someone sent in this video to me. Apparently this bitch is beat me in the Charlie Sheen search for an intern thing that was really just an advertising campaign for some website that Charlie Sheen got paid a lot to use in the moment he was at his most relevant, long before his act got boring, uninteresting, unfunny, repetitive, staged and maybe even pathetic and I’m not saying that cuz I feel rejection, even if it seems like I am, I would have never gone through with the internship thing, I’m saying that cuz he just got boring and more importantly his whore pussy he hires isn’t even hot and it all relevance stems from the whore pussy you fuck….

Either way, I hope this Andy Cap wins.

Posted in:viral

2011

28

Mar

stepNEWS of the Day

Here is the news that isn’t the news to keep you informed about things that don’t really matter, but that can be funny, if you’re not the 12 year old getting raped by the clown….scroll down and see how genius I tie things together…I’m a machine peple. A sloppy booze soaked confused perverted machine.

Women Accidentally Shoot Selves
Two women are suspected of a drive-by shooting Friday night – and they actually ended up shooting themselves!

Clown Arrested in 2002 Rape of Girl
A professional clown suspected of kidnapping and raping a 12-year-old girl in Fullerton nine years ago while he was in costume was arrested today.

Teen Boy-Woman Affair Started in Church
An observant mother … worried about changes in her teenage son’s behavior… discovers something worse than she ever expected. Her 15-year-old son had met a girl at church. They started exchanging text messages and videos. That’s not that unusual. But what if the girl is 20 and the images of the two are graphic?

Pole Dancing for Jesus Goes Global
It’s a story we first brought you last week. Who knew that a small business in Old Town Spring would make headlines across the country?

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

28

Mar

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

I got drunk. Spent my wife’s welfare check on lottery tickets. She tried to chase me around the room, but couldn’t really do it without her medical scooter, but unfortunately when I passed out drunk, bitch choked me out by sitting on my fucking face….300 pounds of pure fishy hell.

Here’s the morning hangover dump…

Can’t wait for the season to begin!
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Snow Dive Fail, Because Old Man Winter Has a Great Sense of Humor
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The Top 100 Road Trip Destinations in America
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These Sluts Will Make the Start to a Shitty Week Better
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Not all Tattoos Suck Ass and Here Are Some Rad Ones
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Britney Spears is Dancing Again, Wear Lingerie
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Fire Cracker Wake Up Prank! Yes!
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Vida Guerra is Lookin Hot on the Beach
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These Two Sluts Get Naughty Together
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And the Rebecca Black Parodies Just Keep on Coming
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:MHD

2011

25

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

There were the two jokes I wrote today for twitter:

The first about shitty things…

It’s shittier than a condom at a gay bath house on a Saturday night.

I don’t think that’s really a joke, since gay guys don’t use condoms, especially at a bathouse…so here the second one about Lohan changing her name to just Lindsay…

I hear MTV is changing their name to just “M” because tv killed the radio star and they want to disassociate themselves from that

I need a hobby. My stomach is rotton as we go into the weekend and that depresses me…. FOLLOW ME

Here are my stepLINKS

Olivia Munn is All Sophisticated and Shit
GO

Lindsay Lohan Family Insanity of the Day
GO

Some Hoods Aren’t Clit Hoods
GO

Spend the Weekend Sith Sluts Who Don’t Talk Back
GO

Britney Spears Looks Amazing When She is Photoshopped to Shit and Doesn’t Look Like Herself
GO

BLACK SWAN WAS THE SHITTEST MOVIE EVER AND THE WHOLE THING WAS A FUCKING SHAM YOU ARE ALL BEING LIED TO YOU FUCKING SHEEP
GO

Because in the End, Vacations Are All About Getting Laid
GO

Cam Shows That You Have GOT to Check Out
GO

Jenny Poussin is One Hot Canadian
GO

Blonde Cutie Self Fisting
GO

The 50 Worst Super Bowl Commercials of All Time
GO

Toys for When You Play
GO

That Barefoot Contessa Cunt Basically Shattered a Dying Child’s Dreams.
GO

Hottie and a Motorcycle
GO

Vanessa Hudgens Side Boob Shot
GO

Yeah I’d Bang Mary Louise Parker
GO

Penelope Cruz is Looking HOT
GO

Hot 100: Busty Babes Blowout
GO

Let’s All Go Get Lunch at FAT HO BURGERS!
GO

I Would Totally Bang Lacey Schwimmer
GO

You’re Gonna Wanna Check Out Leah
GO

Alyssa Miller naked for Greg Kadel
GO

YOU MUST FEAR GODZILLAAAAAAA – VIDEO
GO

Sammie Rhodes and Sea J Oh My Godness
GO

Some Art Shit I Dont Understand With Lots of Tight Bodied Chicks and Boobs
GO

Camilla Belle Thinks She’s a DJ
GO

These Sluts Like to Get Nasty
GO

WWE Diva Trish Stratus
GO

Wtf is With Fashion People Thinking That They Have to Wear Absolutly Everything At Once to Look Good
GO

Fashionably Hot Women @ Nylon Magazine’s 12th Anniversary Party
GO

Random Pic Dump of the Day
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Yet ANOTHER Pole Dancing Fail
GO

Jesus Gives Woman Orgasm – VIDEO
GO

sexy Amateur Insanity
GO

Chantelle Houghton Wears A Lettuce Dress For PETA
GO

Check Out Hot Blonde Blanka
GO

Whoopi Goldberg Was High as Shit During Her Oscar Speech
GO

Vanessa Hudgens Sexiness
GO

Follow Me On FACEBOOK and TWITTER

Posted in:stepLINKS

2011

25

Mar

Taylor Momsen’s Crotch Shot of the Day

I think I like Taylor Momsen so much because her name starts with MOM And I never had a mom…I mean that or because she’s a teenage whore who isn’t really a whore but pretends to be so people talk to her before she turns 18 like she was Panettiere, Lohan, Jojo, Mandy Moore, Miley, The Olsens and a whole lot of other pussy people fixated on at 17, cuz 17 makes them old enough to fuck, just not in America, causing all kinds of confused feelings the media eats up and spits out to make you think these bitches are relevant, until they turn 18 and follow the path of Panettiere, Lohan, Jojo, Mandy Moore, Miley, The Olsens and a whole lot of other pussy people fixated on at 17. Which is pretty much no where special…rich…sure, but totally fucking uselss and practically non existent…if only they could stay 17 forever….DIE 18th birthday. If you know what I mean…. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Taylor Momsen

2011

25

Mar

Vanessa Hudgens is the Amazing Face of the Day

Vanessa Hudgens is today’s Amazing Face….

Amazing face is a stupid new feature I started for no real reason other than posting a picture of a motherfucker with a stupid face, making a stupid enough face for me to consider it an amazing face….

Whether it’s Chris Brown dressed like Sisqo humping fat bitches in bikinis, or Amy Winehouse and Joan Crawford’s bad plastic surgery, or Vanessa Hudgens looking drunk enough to be an easy date rape…the world is filled with Amazing Faces and I think this is the best this site has to offer…. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Amazing Face|Vanessa Hudgens

2011

25

Mar

Doutzen Kroes Bikini Pictures of the Day

Here are some pictures of Doutzen Kroes showing off the shittiest fashion accessories of all time, a baby stroller. Shit.

Bitch had a good thing going for her, why did she go and ruin it with some sperm that she’ll probably be breaking up with down the line anyway, making her ask if it was really worth it or not…more importantly making her convince hereself that is was the right decision that should wouldn’t trade for anything, not even her model body back, cuz without conincing herself of that she’d have no choice but to kill herself…. FOLLOW ME


Posted in:Doutzen Kroes

2011

25

Mar

Emmy Rossum at the Opera of the Day

Wow, she’s so cultured, classy and sophisticated….and here I thought she was just a set of tits on TV, who brings her tits on TV every single week….which I like to think is a much better look than this Opera shit…cuz the Opera isn’t a fucking fetish, it’s for stuffy rich bitches or pretentious trashy bitches looking to be rich bitches, who you have to hope either going bankrupt due to a drug addiction or gets their asses kicked to the curb and their finances turned off due to drug addiction..just to get the chance to see them naked in exchange for drug money….while Emmy Rossum shows her tits on TV to get the chance to the Opera…It’s all backwards and confusing when really all I care about is seeing her fucking tits… FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Emmy Rossum

2011

25

Mar

Nicky Hilton’s Got Bad Ass of the Day

I’ve always Nicky Hilton’s body. I’m sure that’s had a huge impact on her everyday life, you know hitting the gym, buying the right spanx and jeans, studying herself in the mirror wondering if all the hard work, money and time that went into her revamping her look would get my approval, you know since I have a totally insignificant website no one ever reads…but that doesn’t change the fact that she’s got a shitty body and a budget to fix it if she really wanted to. I don’t get how someone seemingly skinny, can look so fucking sloppy, I’m talking her dumpy ass hanging off her bones, like some kind of muscular disorder that doesn’t allow the bitch to tone the fuck up….It’s insane…but I guess in her defense, at least she’s not Paris Hilton…cuz even if bitch rolled out in a wheel chair, attached to a bag to shit in, wearing a helmet so she doesn’t bang her head into the wall compulsively like some kind of retard, she’d still be the sister the family is most proud of, provided they got their Yuppie rich kid heads out of the bag of coke they still dabble in while the kids are out making sex tapes….A family of trash living off one man’s successes…I’m sure that Hilton empire founder would be proud of how shitty his genetics are. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Nicky Hilton

2011

25

Mar

Eva Longoria is an Idiot of the Day

It amazes me how stupid a bitch can be. Like she must have been real smitten with her ex husband Tony Parker’s cock. That motherfucker must have owned her meaty Mexi pussy. Cuz to get a wrist tattoo to profess your love, before being cheated on, or realizing you actually hate the motherfucker when you have to spend more than 5 minutes not fucking the motherfucker, is fucking hilarious…

It’s almost unstable and creepy, like bitch decides “I’m so in love, I’ll throw all logic out the window, cuz I’m a chick and I have no logic, strictly emotions, and I happen to be about to get my period, making me way more insane than before, so I won’t think about this tattoo idea for more than a minute, and I’ll blazen the shit on me in a visible place, not even on my pussy where only people I fuck get to see my failures when the whole thing goes to shit, but on my fucking wrist for the world to see cuz I’m insane and this wrist tattoo will show him I’m not obsessive, creepy and weird at all….kinda thing.

Now she’s rockin’ some tattoo removal tatto on her wrist…scars to represent one of the dumber moments in her life…I mean other than getting into a failed marriage in the first place… FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Eva Longoria

2011

25

Mar

Lindsay Lohan’s Dyke Lover Has a New Pussy of the Day

I have issues with Lindsay Lohan, soon to be just “Lindsay”, cuz she’s disassociating from her woman beating father by dropping his last name, good hustle idiot…

Those issues are really just one issue and that is that we were friendly, she used to text me everyday, but her stupid lesbian, unattractive, opportunist cunt who was literally riding her to the top, turned on me cuz I made fun of her, and I guess wanted to show me who the boss of Lohan was….or maybe it had nothing to do with that…but I know that on some level she ruined my chances of being Lohan, soon to be just Lindsay’s purse carrying friend who follows her around everywhere she goes. Instead, Lohan unfollowed me on Twitter, changed her number, went to rehab and now has nothing to do with me.

She had Lohan, soon to be jus Lindsay in her back pocket. She’d throw her around and get her to do anything she wanted, while having these blow-out fights, I’d somehow always end up being involved in and the whole thing was boring two years when it went down, probably more boring to read now…it was the glory days motherfuckers….

I’m just trying to say she’s a manipulative cunt with no talent who ruined Lohan soon to be Lindsay, and now she’s onto new pussy, who I can assume is going to be famous soon, which may not be news to anyone, cuz most of the world doesn’t know who she is, but it is just proof that Lohan soon to be Lindsay should have stuck it out with me…cuz I got nothing going on and would have been happy just sniffing her dirty panties all day…with no drama…

Either way, I hate Lindsay Lohan’s manly dyke who brain washed her into UNFOLLOWING ME….

-To See The Make Out Pic – If you care about ugly dykes crying for attention –
Follow This Link

Posted in:Samantha Ronson

2011

25

Mar

Nicola Haffmans Half Naked for Helmet of the Day

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I don’t know who Nicola Haffmans is, but it is safe to say she’s another hipster who doesn’t want a real job who snorted coke with the right modeling agent in London, grew out her bush and is now getting work, totally willing to get naked in the shoots, cuz getting naked was what she was doing for money before she got a model contract, but it was for rich boyfriends who wanted hot girlfriends, instead of for photographers and magazines….

I appreciate a girl who knows she has what it takes to stand in front of a camera making serious face in exchange for more money than most bitches make a year working an office like some kind of sucker, giving her tons of free time to do nothing but play with that stupid money she’s making… I mean who wouldn’t show some tit, even if it goes against all morals and values for that deal, I mean shit, it’s just a tit, it’s not like she’s letting strangers cum inside her…I think working an office job is a hell of a lot more expoloiting, whoring, disgusting, and degrading. This model shit screams freedom at me like it was braveheart…this is a hot little photoshoot…I dig…keep it up…. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Nicola Haffmans